The Trials
by SoWrites
Summary: 2014 Edit. A naive Naruto and a bitter Sasuke face The Trials given to them by the Konoha Council. If they pass, they will become the Hokage and Assistant. Even if they succeed, what could they possibly do about the corrupt Ninja World? NaruSasu, First Person Switching by chapter. Warnings where necessary. Consider 699 to be last chapter and this as a continuation. #RealNewEra
1. Pretrial: Confrontation

New and improved and edited!

After the Naruto ending we were given, I was so grateful that I had written this a few years ago. Now I have an idea of what I would've like to see happen in the end.

I hope this is a good enough gift to those who hope to see the #RealNewEra

Regardless, this is still dedicated to my girlfriend, whose relationship to me, including our three year separation, always seemed eerily similar to NaruSasu. Still holds true, in its own way.

I don't own anything of Naruto. Do you still really have to say that on fan fiction?

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><p><strong>The Trials<strong>

_Pre-Trial: Confrontation_

The newly built Hokage tower rises above the rest of my young village. Well, not that it's really young, but you know what I mean; it's all fresh and unpainted. In a way, its newness could be blamed on me. I couldn't get to the village fast enough to save the buildings. Excuse my timing or whatever. At least the people were all safe in the end, right?

Though, now that I'm thinking about it, even the villagers are acting younger and darting around like a weight has been lifted. Apparently, the Will of Fire finally got through to ninjas and citizens alike. It's almost like there isn't any stigma attached to the village's past anymore. Maybe that's true?

Ha, look at me, using words like "stigma". I think I'm hanging out with Shikamaru and Sakura too much. I even read another book! And I liked it! It blows my mind.

But right now, I have no time to waste on reading Pervy Sage's Icha Icha books, none at all! I've finally gotten my chance, and I'm not ruining it by pulling a Kakashi! So, I work myself into a quick pace, my excitement getting to me. Everyone's heard the news, so I receive enough praises and pats to leave both my cheeks and my back red.

The glow remains until I notice a particularly large group of ANBU posted along the rooftops a few blocks away. A ladder is raised, and a few guards begin to climb. Another dark figure, not an ANBU, struggles to climb the ladder while they are yanked by heavy-looking chains.

Now that the figure is at the top, I can just make out that they have handcuffs and chakra suppressors all up their forearms. And if that isn't harsh enough, two guards pull on their chains while another blindfolds them with a headband. A prisoner...

It's injustices like that that just piss me off and make me wanna become Hokage even more. And finally, that dream is within walking distance.

Making my way down the curved hall leading to the meeting room, I let my nerves slow me down. Wait, the great Uzumaki, nervous? No, I'm just trembling with anticipation, that's all.

Alright, I don't really have the same expectations about being Hokage that I did when I was a kid. I know it's way harder, but this is my dream we're talking about! Now, it's not a matter of being the best and having everyone finally acknowledge me - that's been done.

Even though Konoha has healed and improved so much in such a short time, it's still not what I believe it can be. I need to be Hokage to make my promises happen, not just for the people in Konoha, but for all of the other ninja I met and fought alongside during the war.

Hopefully, the meeting can stay on points like that instead of other things I'd rather not talk about. The last thing I need is for the old geezers to pretend to be deaf to me and say some shit about me still being a child. I'm eighteen! I mean, Gaara was even younger when he became Kazekage and was Commander General of the Joint Shinobi Army!

I'm never going to be as level-headed as Gaara is now, but that's always worked to my advantage, anyway.

The guards outside the meeting hall have familiar faces, and I feel just a little calmer as they smile at me.

"You'll probably get lucky, Naruto. They're always less grumpy after they've had tea," Kotetsu chuckles and pats my shoulder.

"Konoha's rooting for you, Uzumaki," Izumo adds before the two open the double doors and shove me in.

It takes all the self control I have not to stumble as my sandals sink deep into the tatami mats. A cloud of incense floats past me, revealing the three people I need to convince: the Konoha Council.

"Take off your sandals, boy, you're getting our tatami dirty," the oldest hag chides me. Her green and red earrings wave with the slight shake of her head.

I feel my eye twitch as I bow shallowly in apology, but I obey the orders and kneel down on the dark green cushion given to me.

The low table in between us is bare on my half, but littered with various official-looking scrolls and an old tea set on theirs.

"Utatane-sama, Mitokado-sama, Tsunade-...sama," I let the unfamiliar title for baa-chan roll off my tongue. Even I can hear the tell-tale rasp in my voice, the same that I had mostly grown out of, but I don't dare clear my throat.

They aren't the type to waste any of the short amount of time they have left, so Mitokado starts reading off of a scroll that I recognize as my record file.

"Uzumaki Naruto, Chuunin, age 18, a former member of the Rokudaime's Team Seven. Ninja registration number 012607, graduated under Umino Iruka at the Ninja Academy at age 12. The Jinchuuriki of the Kyuubi, and now in full control of the demon. Had a large hand in the defeat of Uchiha Madara, Uchiha Obito, and Kaguya during the Fourth Shinobi World War. Defeated Pein and other members of Akatsuki. Son of Namikaze Minato and the former Jinchuuriki of the Kyuubi, Uzumaki Kushina," he finishes and glances up at me above his green frames like he's asking for me to comment. I simply nod my head to show that I listened to him read off my record like it's a baseball card.

"You have been recognized as a hero of sorts for this village," Utatane grumbles, "But that doesn't guarantee anyone the title of Hokage."

Duh, I want to say to her, but it should get me pretty damn close. Maybe I should read off her record to see what "guaranteed" her the title of the official Scary Grandma of Konoha. Nevermind Tsunade, how the hell did Sandaime work with these jerks?

"Naruto," Tsunade's softer voice is a welcomed change, "we wouldn't have called you here if you had no chance of becoming Hokage. There will be much more involved in this process for you than there has been for years."

"Why?"

It's much easier to talk to Tsunade after all these years of calling her an old hag, but that might end up being my downfall here. Wait, what was it she said? A process? I never heard of there being a process for becoming the Hoka-

Tsunade interrupts my thoughts like she read them, "It hasn't been a process for many years because all but one of the previous Hokages were appointed during a time of distress. The Shodai Hokage, my grandfather, appointed his younger brother during the First Shinobi World War. They were still fighting that war when Nidaime passed the title down to Sandaime. Many years later, he was defeated by Orochimaru, and I became the Godaime. I was going to take too long to recover from the war, so I chose to step down and allow Kakashi to handle the aftermath as the Rokudaime."

I'm sure she knew I would notice which one was missing. How couldn't I?

"My father, he was chosen to be the Yondaime after the war, right?" I asked, locking eyes with Tsunade to avoid seeing the expressions on the other two.

"It was a time of relative peace, and there was no rush to instate a new Hokage since Sarutobi-sama still had plenty of years left in him. It was then that he discovered the Trials in documents left to future Hokages. These were scrolls written by Shodai himself. In them, he found that a new Hokage wasn't meant to be named until they passed the thirteen Trials left behind. These are the trials that your father completed to become Hokage, and they are the trials that you have the choice to attempt."

"So what, is this like the Chuunin exams? Am I going to be thrown into the Forest of Death again or pitted against an army? Or am I going to be running around an arena for everyone's entertainment?" Oh shit, I think, as I bite my tongue and bunch the orange fabric of my pants into my fists.

Mitokado speaks up finally to deliver this charmer, "As profitable as it would be to televise your Trials, we have already come to the conclusion that we wouldn't want to risk a camera or a cameraman to record it," Geez, straighten out your priorities, "You'll just have to come back to the village after every trial and come to this meeting room with your Assistant to report."

"Did you- I mean- Assistant?" I instantly picture Shizune running into Tsunade's office with a huge stack of reports and Ton-ton waddling alongside her.

And just like the woman she's assisting, Shizune can read minds, apparently, as she is the next person through the doors behind me. She's followed by Sakura and Shikamaru, of all people. The three of them enter, line up side by side to bow, and take their seats; Shikamaru on my right, Sakura on my left, and Shizune next to Tsunade on the other side of the table.

"Haruno Sakura, age 18, Former..." Blah, blah, blah I know where this is going, Mitokado does the same thing for Sakura and Shikamaru that he did for me. Sakura has been working in the hospital non-stop since her participation in the war, earning herself a high position in the medic nin field. Shikamaru, on the other hand, was constantly being sent out for missions that required his amazing skills as a strategist. Both of them were irreplaceable during and after the war.

Once he finished Sakura's spiel, she bowed so deeply it looked like she was imitating a rock. Shikamaru's bow was more of a drawn-out nod.

"For these qualities and accomplishments, Nara Shikamaru has been chosen by Utatane Koharu-sama and I, Mitokado Homura, as a candidate for the position of Assistant of the Nanadaime," he announces, and things start to click.

These Trials or whatever sound hard, but I'm not going to be alone.

"And for her qualities and accomplishments, I have chosen Haruno Sakura as a candidate for the position of Assistant of the Nanadaime. Naruto, both candidates are close friends of yours, but they are both highly qualified for their work. You are now allowed to choose which candidate you wish to have as your Assistant."

I stare blindly at Tsunade for a second, but I soon snap out of it when I feel a gentle hand placed on top of mine. I turn my head to my left to catch Sakura's little smile. It quickly turns into a silent scream as the doors are brutally snapped open and a dark body is thrown onto the mats behind us.

Two masked ANBU march forward to grab the figure and force them into a kneeling position by kicking their legs together and yanking them up by their long mat of dull black hair. Their entire body is dusted by some crumbly white stuff.

Hey, they have handcuffs, chakra suppressors, and a headband blindfold! This must be that person I saw with the huge entourage earlier, that prisoner!

Well, no matter what they've done, they can't possibly deserve being tossed about like this!

I begin to stand up in protest, but one of the ANBU begins to speak. His words are muffled slightly by the long beak on his mask.

"We've brought the prisoner, as requested. It was a longer trip than intended, we apologize, but we had to drag him across rooftops. We followed your orders; he was never walking in the streets. He didn't complain, at least- Whoah!"

A teacup smashes on the wall right behind where the ANBU's head was just a second ago. Tsunade is on her feet, her monstrous fists threatening the two guards. Shizune stands gaping next to her, trying to hold her back with a too-gentle hand.

"You complete morons! If you miss your appointment, don't assume that we aren't busy with something else! He's the last person we want in here! You were supposed to be in and out of here an hour ago!" she screamed, and the tension of the room turns into one that's not so official.

"We apologize, Hokage-sama," the next ANBU, this one masked as a badger, makes himself known, "But, if you would please complete the sentencing, it won't be a wasted trip! All you have to do is sentence him to death and we'll be on our way."

Death? Who the hell could be bad enough to deserve death? No one, that's who! So, of course, I have to speak up.

"Yo, Baa-chan, who's this prisoner and what did he do?"

But now Koharu begins complaining,"Fools! It's hard enough to feel safe in the same room as the Jinchuuriki, now you want to add the Uchiha to the mix?"

Wait a fucking second.

Uchiha?

The table smashes in half from the sheer force of my hands slamming down. I quickly lift myself and spin around to face who might be my best friend on the ground.

The ANBU make a quick move towards me, but there's no stopping me. I take the handcuffs in my hands and break the chain with red chakra. I use the same chakra to overload all but two of the chakra suppressors.

Soon, I feel the weak signature that I craved to run into years ago. The same signature that was supposed to be in Kumogakure, willingly and freely serving under them for a few years as a repentance for attacking the Eight-Tails Jinchuuriki and taking the arm of the Raikage. Or so I was told!

Though common sense tells me not to, I have to see what's behind the blindfold to be sure it's him. I slow down my frantic movements to untie the familiar headband. I let it fall into the lap of Uchiha Sasuke. His red eyes, dulled by the suppressors but still vivid, show the pattern of the Eternal Sharingan and Rinnegan. They could've been keeping him blindfolded for more than a year.

He spent a whole year as a prisoner, and not even Tsunade told me about Sasuke's suffering!

"I knew it, I knew I shouldn't have let him leave! I trusted you assholes! You said he was pardoned!" I turn my head to scream at them, then turn back quickly to assess the damage to the once-proud Uchiha.

Though I should be more careful, I reach behind Sasuke's head and bring his hair forward. It falls in dreads and mats that brush his calloused hands that lay in his lap.

Hands? They must have given him an artificial arm like mine. Now, whether it was his choice or not…

My eyes travel up, and I see that he's thinning quickly; even the loose, black shirt can't conceal his protruding ribs and weakening muscles.

"Naru...to?" His ragged voice pushes past his chapped lips.

Trying to hold back tears of anger, I turn my head once again to look at Tsunade and address the bigger issue at hand.

"Death? You were going to kill Sasuke behind my back, after all those years it took to get him home? He even helped us at the end of the war, and you three think he deserves death?"

"Guards, put the blindfold back on the Uchiha and move him to the corner. Our current business is more pressing," Koharu snips, which makes me want to attack her just to wipe that small smirk off her face.

I really would've done it, too, if it weren't for Sakura, who's reaching her hand out to lead me quietly to my cushion.

If it wasn't already broken, I would've broken the table again, but I did every trick I knew to keep my anger down; I bit my tongue, bunched the fabric of my pants in my fist, and stared right at the one person I knew would give me some answers.

"Naruto, if we would've completed his sentencing today, we would've claimed that he had died of disease out in his travels. I'm sorry, but it's been decided by the council that his crimes couldn't be pardoned. What he did in the name of revenge and revolution was inexcusable, no matter the ultimate outcome."

Tsunade does look torn, tired, and apologetic, which leads me to believe that it was the two wrinkled asses in front of me that were responsible for this whole plan. What the hell did they end up telling Kakashi?

"Tsunade, he must make his decision now. Time is of the essence, you realize. They need to make it to the inn they're staying at tonight before sun down," Mitokado sighs impatiently.

He waves a hand at the guards, and I watch as they take the opportunity to blindfold Sasuke again and drag him by his hair to sit in the corner. At least Sasuke has the strength to use his freed hands to help move himself.

A cough from in front of me brings my attention back to the matter at hand.

"Why do I need an Assistant? And do either of these guys even want to do it?" I demand, and for the first time, it's Shizune who speaks up.

"An Assistant is vital to the Hokage. They are supposed to make up for any pitfalls that the Hokage might have and support them so they can make the best decisions. In my case, Tsunade-sama has a difficulty staying awake long enough to finish her reports, and she is very loose with money. I, on the other hand, have issues with unfinished work, and I'm very frugal. You see? It follows the principle of Yin and Yang, of compatibility," she explains it as clearly as possible, but something still doesn't fit for me.

"So why did you choose Sakura or Shikamaru?" I ask, and now it's Shikamaru, who I thought was sleeping this whole time, who answers me.

"Sakura was picked for her intelligence and that she would be driven enough to make you do your work, assuming you wouldn't do it anyway. Also, she can represent the feminine Yin that you lack. I, on the other hand, was also chosen for my intelligence, though I think they didn't realize that I would be even lazier than you. However, I know that I was chosen for my battle experience, which would be helpful for your trials." He shrugs, then rolls his neck around, making small cracking noises.

I don't spend more time watching him as I'm too busy trying to picture who would be the best to bring with me.

Sakura would be great as a medic nin, but I don't need healing usually because of Kurama.

Shikamaru would probably make the best plans, and I've always wanted to work with him when I'm the Hokage. But, this Assistant thing sounds like a huge commitment, and he's already committed to being his clan leader. And he's right, the last thing I need is to become less motivated to complete boring reports.

But if they're my choices…

"Is the decision I make now final?" I glance up at Koharu, but it's Tsunade who tells me that it is.

So, I tell them that I've made my choice. My finger raises and points to which friend I wish to have work beside me. Everyone gasps, and the guard that I'm pointing at has a finger pointed at himself.

"No, not you, you dolt! Sasuke! I choose Sasuke!" I yell, jumping up and making Sasuke stand up by pulling on his rough hands.

"He's not one of your choices, Naruto! He's not a candidate!" Mitokado and Koharu start complaining, but they're too old to stand up and stop me.

"No, he's right. His decision is final, and he chose Sasuke. If he was still a recognized Konoha ninja, he would've been my first choice as his Assistant."

She steps over the broken table and lifts the headband off of Sasuke.

"Uchiha Sasuke, do you accept the position of Assistant to Naruto as he goes through these Trials and promise to serve him if he succeeds?" she asks, daring to stare into his Sharingan.

"Hn..." he starts out, sounding more like himself, "What do I get from it?"

"A full pardon," I scramble to answer, making sure that the elders realize it's directed at them, "And he's actually considered a Konoha ninja this time!"

"And if you fail?" Mitokado asks, raising his eyebrow. I suck in a breath to answer, and Sakura's face makes it obvious that she knows what I'm about to say.

"I'll go on death row in place of Sasuke, and he is free to go and live anywhere outside of Konoha."

I know that they find me as even more of a threat than Sasuke, so I wasn't surprised when the two elders nodded their heads in agreement.

"Do you accept these terms, Sasuke?" Tsunade asks again.

Everyone's eyes are on Sasuke, who straightens his back and looks at me to answer.

"I do," he says, but his eyes turn into slits, "For purely selfish reasons."

Hell, that hurts, but I should've expected he wouldn't be too happy with me.

"I accept them, too," I say, and take the headband from Tsunade. Instead of tying it around his eyes, I tie it around his forehead. His hair is all messed up, but I can still see a bit of the Sasuke I said goodbye to a year ago.

"Now, where is that inn you talked about? And I assume we'll be given some supplies?" I ask hurriedly.

"So you can travel with all the equipment specified in the document, you and your...Assistant...will be riding in a carriage with storage compartments to the town. You'll receive your first Trial tomorrow."

I twitch a bit at how disgusted Koharu sounded when she said 'Assistant.'

"Is it out there now?" I ask, my hand already on the door.

"Yes, but-" Mitokado begins, but I cut him off.

"Then we'll be leaving. Nice seeing you, Sakura, Shikamaru. Sorry, no offense to either of you," I smile at both of my friends.

Though they look concerned, they smile back.

At that, I take Sasuke by the wrist and pull him through the doors. Yeah, I hear the two elders squawking at Tsunade, but they don't matter to me now. I don't really have to impress them anymore, I just gotta get through these Trials.

With Sasuke.

Who, speaking of which, seems to be going along with me, even though I'm dragging him. It's a bit unnerving, actually, knowing that he's quick to comply because he's been shoved around by those ANBU for about a year. He's so used to being blinded and cuffed.

My mind wanders to all the things that the ANBU is capable of doing to people. He might've also been subjected to the terrifying Interrogation and Torture Squad!

I can't seem to calm down until we get to the exit. I swallow and let my gaze shift towards Sasuke.

"There's not many people out there, so you don't have to worry about them noticing you before we get into the carriage. But, in any case, you should protect your eyes. You haven't used them for a while, right?"

Oh, damn, I feel like I need to cough but I just swallow again and lead us out of the Hokage Tower. Sasuke doesn't make any sound, but he does keep his head down and eyes away from the light.

I guide him into the wagon and follow right behind him, shutting the doors gently. I seat myself across from him and finally allow myself to look at his face again. I jump a little when I'm met with dim red.

Oh, right, I forgot about the chakra suppressors.

My hands wrap around the last metal bands, and for a split second I reconsider, but I still overload them. One of them lands on my toe, but I don't make any sudden sounds.

Sasuke shakes his head, eyes closed, and rubs his arms. When he looks at me again, I finally see the familiar crimson of Sasuke's eyes.

"Uh, there you go! I'll need all the help I can get from you to do these Trials," I give a huge grin, and it's not completely faked.

"There was no guarantee that I would lift a finger to help you. Shikamaru and Sakura, they would've been more than glad to fall all over themselves to help their hero."

I'm trying to stop myself from kicking my own ass. The connection between us has not weakened at all, so all the pain in his heart is flooding into me while I look into his eyes. He said hero but I heard betrayer.

"This is obviously a better deal, don't you think?" I press and forgo any attempt to fake a smile.

"No matter how this turns out, I get out. Shouldn't that be even more of a reason for me to not care about the outcome? In fact, it would be better for me if you failed," he bites back, one eyebrow disappearing under the headband.

Ahh, wait...if I complete the Trials, Sasuke becomes a Konoha Ninja and gets a full pardon, but he has to work for me. If I fail, I die in his place and he gets out of Konoha for good. Both sound pretty good for Sasuke. Fuckin' A. My hand flies to scratch the back of my head once I realize how stupid my terms are.

"Look, I'm sorry, I just-" I start, but his growl stops me in my tracks.

"It's your fault, you idiot. You tricked me to get me to come back here, saying stupid shit and spewing lies. Then you believed the very bastards who are responsible for the massacre of my clan! Like hell they were going to let me out of Konoha freely!"

Okay, so maybe I don't want him to talk. I would join him if he wanted to rip my heart out of my chest and start stomping on it.

"My fault? Do you really think feel it's my fault?" I ask, but I already know the answer even before Sasuke's glare tells me.

Thinking back to the war, I remember Sasuke fighting against me and what we've admitted to each other. He trusted me, and he lands in jail because of it. Fuckin' A!

"I trusted Tsunade and Kakashi, but those elders seem to have even more power than they do!"

What an excuse, idiot. Blame the old chick, that'll make Sasuke happier!

His voice is warmed up now, so his words are hitting me at full force.

"Even if it were true that I was in Kumogakure, one would think that, after all that garbage about wanting me back, you would think of checking up on me. Or you would send a message, even, to your old friends over in that village, and maybe put a word in to ask about me? Was anybody stopping you?"

Though he's saying one thing, I'm the only one who would be able to hear what he's really asking me. I didn't want to think of Sasuke asking these things from inside a small cell.

Why aren't you saving me?

What are you doing that's more important than helping me?

What happened to being my friend?

The only thing I've been doing this past year was training, building, eating, and sleeping. Non-stop, no other thoughts. Once I thought that Sasuke was safely in another village, repenting and being treated well, I began running on auto-pilot.

For the first time since I've met him, Sasuke didn't constantly slip into my thoughts. Since Sakura was always in the hospital, she and I never talked about him, and she didn't think of asking about him, either.

Kakashi is also busy as the Hokage. He's currently surveying the damage to the country and small villages because of the war.

Nobody made time for Sasuke in their thoughts at a time when he would most need it.

"Sasuke, all I can say is that I'm so sorry. I just didn't know and I never would have thought they would do this. You're my best friend, Sasuke! I never wanted this to happen."

I plead with him, hoping that my feelings reach him like his are reaching me. It seems to be working, I guess. He looks a bit more relaxed than he did a few minutes ago, at least, but he refuses to acknowledge my apology.

We spend some awkward moments in complete silence. Sasuke's dreads sway with every rattle of the carriage.

"Hey, Sasuke, can you sit in front of me for a minute?" I ask as quietly and cautiously as possible.

"I am sitting in front of you, usuratonkachi."

Even though I know he's pissed at me, the old insult makes my stomach flutter and a smile pull on my lips. Maybe, just maybe, this isn't the end of everything between us.

"I mean here." I point to the floor between my feet.

"The hell?" He sends bloody daggers with his bright eyes, but what for?

All I said was . . . oh, shit. I scramble to cover for myself, but I feel my neck heating up a bit.

"I want to cut your hair!" I clarify, and he noticeably relaxes. Safe!

"I'm not sure that the inn will let us in if you look like I picked you up from an opium den," I spout, and his glare returns.

Fuckin' A!

Despite my suddenly horrible social skills, he sits facing away from me and unties the headband so that I can have access to the long mess of black strands. Ah, well at least the only bad dreads are a couple ones up front here.

Oh...

Prison is boring enough for dreading your own hair, I guess…

Hey, at least the back isn't bad, but it definitely needs cleaned and combed. I take a kunai from my pouch and chop off the dreads, which were luckily near the bottom.

It's not the nicest job, but I manage to cut his bangs so that they resemble what they were a few years ago, if not a little longer. The back is quicker, but I stop cutting once his hair is short enough to spike in the back like it used to.

I run a hand through just to untangle the last few knots. Despite the dust, your hair is pretty soft, ne, Sasuke?

"What did you say about my hair?" Sasuke's quick to go sit back on his side.

He doesn't stay there for long once he sees all of his old hair on the ground. I watch him throw it all out the open window and wipe his dusty hands on his black prison clothes.

"Uh, I didn't say anything, I just asked if you wanted your headband back," I grab my convenient cover-up and offer it to him.

His hand hesitates, but he takes one end of the headband. My heart aches as I remember his departure yet again. This headband meant so much to both of us, and to see it used to hurt Sasuke is unforgivable.

Instead of tying it around his head, it goes around his neck like how Hinata wears hers. Uh, weird comparison, self, don't do that. Hinata and Sasuke?

Glancing up at my face, he gives me a simple explanation, "I don't want to risk it covering my eyes." Understandable, "Anyway, I'm not used to wearing headbands anymore."

"We had some kick-ass headbands during the war, didn't we? I wish we would've kept them, but I guess that would defeat the purpose of having the different village symbols on them in the first place, right? No one would know what village a shinobi's from if it just says that he's a shinobi. Vague, huh?"

Good, a conversation about headbands. This is such a great topic, I'm sure we can shoot the shit like this until we end up at the inn.

And then I can hide in my room.

"Did you forget that I never wore one of those, you idiot?" His arms and legs cross in one fluid motion, and I can see some strength returning to those weakened muscles. By the way...

"Oh, right. Hey, enough talk about past war stuff. We gotta stay in the present right now! We're getting the Trial tomorrow. We'll have time to shower and relax and think of strategies and whatever else tonight. So, I was thinking," I smirk at him, knowing he'll hear the challenge, "How about warming up a bit with me tonight?"

"What." I didn't even hear it as a question, that's how bluntly he said it. Damn it...

"Sparring, Sasuke, sparring. You haven't used your muscles in forever. They need warmed up!"

I made sure he heard every damn word so there couldn't be any more weird misunderstandings, "Strictly taijutsu. You'll just have to practice with your Sharingan along the way."

Once he seems to understand, he smirks a bit at me.

"Sounds good."

Aw yeah, that's the first positive-sounding thing he's said this whole time!

He didn't expect me to answer, so neither of us spoke up until we made it to the inn. The driver pulled a huge bag out of a compartment underneath his seat and threw it onto the ground. I guess they're our supplies.

Then again, the town we're staying in has signs everywhere for shops of all kinds, so they seem a bit unnecessary. Feeling the sad and deflated frog wallet in my pocket, I remember to be grateful.

Despite what I said before, the woman running the inn does not actually seem to think Sasuke was pulled from an opium den. I must be better at hair-cutting than I thought since I can see on her cheeks the same blush that used to tint every girl's face whenever they were around Sasuke.

When we open the door to our room, I get proven wrong yet again. I would have no room to hide in. Even a ninja can't hide in a shared room.

Fuckin' A.


	2. Soul Trial: Reacquaintance

Now, we switch to Sasuke's perspective.

* * *

><p><em>Trial 1: Reacquaintance<em>

Currently, the only thing that has my attention is the door to the shower room. He's trying to talk to me and get me to look at him, but he's not saying anything important. I don't care if my futon is closer to the door or to the bathroom, anything is better than a prison cot.

Sifting through the supplies, I find what I'm looking for; I pull out a towel, a bar of soap, shampoo, and even a bottle of conditioner just to be thorough. My own filth, the grime from the prison, and the building materials they constantly had me working with are coalescing on every inch of my body.

I've barely survived this long by ignoring it in the same way that people have to ignore that their tongue is never comfortable in their own mouth.

"Taking a shower?"

Why no, Naruto, I'm about to make dinner. You learn interesting recipes in prison. Would you like a cake with a nail file in it?

"Hn."

It's not exactly what's on my mind, but with the way his stupid grin falls, it seems sufficient enough. I close the bathroom door behind me and strip unceremoniously. I plan on burning the clothes anyway, so I don't even bother to pick them up from the floor.

Unlike the prison showers, I could get the water to be a temperature other than devil's piss or melted glacier. Gray footprints mark up the tiles as I go to sit on the shower bench.

The drain becomes a disgusting whirlpool, like someone I know. But it's hard to be...bitter, I guess you could call it, when I'm getting clean. Unfortunately, it's not going to last long since I agreed to go sparring with the moron. That guy...

Though I'm making it seem to him that I blame him entirely, I've spent too much time pondering my past in a cell to feel like I'm not at least partially responsible for what I've done. There are plenty of people that my old self would still want revenge on, but that's not who I am anymore.

I think.

If that were still me, if Naruto had given up on me . . .

I admitted to myself long ago that Naruto is the only reason I didn't make every mistake possible.

But even while we fought, I wouldn't let him have what he wanted from me. He wanted me to try living, which included trying to trust the people around me. Once Madara and Kaguya were out of the way, I was stupidly eager to go along with that idea.

Despite my desire for revolution, I knew how it would end before it began. To be honest, it felt good to just give in to him. With how much he improved, I had doubted that I would be able to do anything else.

But look where it's gotten me!

And yet, he thinks a sparring session will make me forgive him? I'm well aware that his method of being a punching bag for my hatred works for me. It's not enough this time.

Hatred isn't what I'm feeling. Hatred makes people irrational. My anger has been clearly justified by the village's actions. If he wants to become their puppet, spouting his half-baked ideas for change while they continue to work from the shadows, I want no part in it.

I will hear the Trial tomorrow and just wait until he fails. The dobe better hope there's no written exams, but at least it would be cleaner that way.

I sigh as I run the towel over my hair, wishing I had remembered to pick up a comb from the bag . . . damn it, that's what I forgot. There's no way I'm putting my prison rags back on, so I have no choice but to wander out there in a towel to grab something to sleep in.

I wonder if he will dare to insult me when he knows he's already on my blacklist.

Pulling the towel around my bare waist, I get so far as to put my hand on the door before I catch a glimpse of myself in a full-length mirror.

He didn't do too bad with my hair, I guess.

Prison food is disgusting and I lost interest in exercising after the first few months of being in jail, so my body is way too thin for my liking. I still have muscle definition in my arms, chest, and abs, but my ribs, collarbone, and hip bones are too prominent.

My elbows and wrists feel weak as stretch my arms out to my sides. My legs are still toned, and my knees aren't knobby, but there's only so much damage a year in prison can do.

As for my face, I look like I'm in desperate need of sleep. Sleep's something that I won't get unless I'm dressed, so I push on the door and stride quickly towards the bag I saw clothes in.

"Hey Sasuke, I made dinner, I hope you like -"

I'm not facing him, but I can feel his eyes burning into my back, so I turn around to face him.

"Unless you prefer I stay like this, I have to get something to wear."

I wasn't serious in the slightest about there being any other option, but that didn't stop Naruto from becoming as red as the sauce on the spaghetti he cooked.

If that idiot would just look away from me for a second I'd be able to turn and get my clothes, but no, he has to stare at me like a moron.

Where are his eyes going?

I'm suddenly aware that this towel is too short for comfort. I force a cough, and his eyes go flying back up. Taking the short opportunity, I just grab the whole bag with my free hand and shut myself in the bathroom.

I catch a small glimpse of myself in the mirror and I refuse to believe that I have any color crawling onto my face.

There's a light blue sleeping kimono top and matching pants in the bag, but again I recall the upcoming sparring session. Digging through the bag, I find a black pair of thin sweatpants and a pair of blue boxer-briefs.

I don't find any shirts. How could they forget that? Perhaps they forgot it as they rushed to get it packed for me instead of Sakura or Shikamaru. What idiots.

There's a bit of summer left in the air, so it will have to do. What I really could do without is the look that dobe gives me when I come out and sit at the table.

He manages to keep the staring down to a minimum, which is for the best since I'm not attempting to use proper table etiquette.

At least it's not very easy to wolf down spaghetti. Luckily, I avoid making a mess of myself. By the end, I still feel like I could eat ten more plates. He didn't make nearly enough to feed a starving prisoner.

While he clears the table, I make my way out of the inn and onto the roof. This town looks nothing like Konoha, but it's similar to some of the places I've ended up when traveling; there are shops and neon signs as far as I can see in one direction, but the low sun is pushing its rays through trees a few kilometers away in another.

"You're looking for a place to spar, right? I'm not paying for damages to the inn's roof!"

I wasn't expecting him to appear behind me, nor did I sense him somehow, but I manage not to flinch. I'm sorely out of practice.

I'm reminded of his reputation during the war as the next Yellow Flash, or more like Orange Flash. It's rare to see him being serious enough to earn such a title. When I look to him, all I can see is the hyperactive boy that I couldn't get out of my mind.

Too bad I was so forgettable to him.

"West, you can see the trees from here," I state bluntly.

That weird smile returns to his face again. It's the same one that's been appearing every time I say a word. If he keeps it up, I'm well-trained in being mute.

"Let's get there and back before it's dark, alright?" He suggests in a rare moment of intelligence.

Before I can nod, he starts rambling again.

"Hey, how about we race there? Wait, no," He stops smiling, "It's not that I think you'd run away, I just don't want to throw the chances out there, ya know? Whatever, it's hard for you to beat me even when you're at your peak!"

Pissing me off...

"Keep talking like that and I'll kick your ass, usuratonkachi. Hokage or not."

I get prepared to jump to the next roof, but a loud burst of laughter stops me before I push off.

"You're really trying to be a prick, Sasuke, but you're out of practice with that, too!"

The hell?

He has to stop laughing again before he continues, "After all those threats about just walking out on me, you pretty much say that I could become Hokage!"

Sheer stupidity, that's all that just poured out from his huge, idiotic grin. As an instinct left from our past, he and I stand with our glaring eyes just centimeters apart. He'll be able to feel every damn word I have to say since they seem to make him so deliriously giddy.

"I don't even see why you have to do these Trials. I don't remember a single Hokage who didn't just get in. Are you so stupid that they need proof you won't run the village into the ground? Your village is in a crater anyway, so you're perfect for the job! Send the village straight to Hell for all I care!"

"My father, you asshole, he-!"

"Ah, so it runs in the family?" Biting and snarling...it seems too familiar. Nostalgic, even.

"Shut up! Do you know how many low blows I could take right now 'cause you brought that in?"

"What? You don't want to mention my family? Hn, wonder why! Maybe it's because you're trying to get me to work for the same bastards who have destroyed my clan and its honor?"

"No, Sasuke. Just listen to me!"

He's getting so close that I can smell spaghetti. I can't stand this proximity, I have to back up-

SHIT!

"Sasuke, you should be grateful, you know."

He thinks he can toy with me just because his grip on my wrist is the only thing keeping me from falling to the pavement. Stupid curb.

"Grateful?! You fucking dumbass!"

The idiot tries to lift me back up, but the slippery pavement strikes again.

"Fuckin' A!"

Leave it to Naruto to try to stop someone from falling and end up toppling backwards himself.

"Would you just let go of me already!" I growl.

His grip has gotten tight enough to feel like a handcuff.

"Funny, Sasuke. You first."

He's smirking at me, the bastard.

Looking down, I realize why. Unlike me, he has a shirt on that someone can grab, which is unfortunately what I'm doing. Naruto also has a lap for me to fall and land in.

He's too warm, it's unnatural.

"I can't remember the last time I've seen you blush, Sasuke."

I whip my head around to glare at him before chewing him out, but his cocky grin and my current position take all of the fuel out of my anger. I jump up and wipe my hands off on my pants like I'm trying to get rid of any traces of him. It's extremely childish, but it always works on him.

He huffily picks himself up. I'm already flying across rooftops to the forest. He yells out some incoherent complaint as he chases after me.

As uneventful as taijutsu sparring is on most occasions, it does the trick for me. Before either of us makes a move, he already has out a thousand clones for me to tear through.

Once I get to the real Naruto, I refuse to stop until I see him get as exhausted as I am. By the end, we are dragging each other through the town.

We collapse side by side on the cool tatami floor, panting heavily. Naruto groans every time he has to move his ribs to breathe.

I nearly go insane watching every drop of sweat form, trail down his whiskered cheeks, then fall off his strong chin onto the tatami floor. The sweat highlights the angles in his face that were barely present a year ago. I don't know why it's bothering me so much.

His face contorts in pain as he presses up from the floor. He stumbles over to the closet that holds the futons.

It's hard...to think clearly, but I know I'm crawling. There's a pillow and then...

Flashes of red and gold, like fire. Purple and silver light the way towards a familiar grove. We trained here. We...there's always been a "we." I'm gone, it's "we" now.

When are we going to see each other again?

We're in our Valley again, fighting endlessly.

My only weakness, and he's crying this time.

Something is missing, or I'm missing something, what is missed?

What's this pressure on my leg? What's grazing it...a bug? Just what...?

"Huh?" I blink until I'm at least semi-conscious, and the first thing I make out is an orange knee. Another graze at my leg caused me to be fully alert, but I was too sore to make any move to get away.

"You got a cut on your leg that you didn't notice, or something. I'm just cleaning and bandaging it."

Naruto doesn't look at me to speak, he just dabs rubbing alcohol on the shallow wound and starts winding a small bandage over it. His hands work nimbly, but the repetitive grazing on my inner thigh makes me want to push him away and do it myself.

It's so frustrating. Or is it agitating? Nevertheless, it's bothering me and I want him to stop, but he's done before I can properly complain.

"Breakfast is nothing special, I just made some of the crappy oatmeal they had in the supply box. I already ate, but I wanna shower before whoever's coming gets here with our Trial."

It's unlike him to be so efficient, but I can't help but think he's trying to do it for my benefit. Hell, when hasn't he done something for my benefit? Excluding this past year, of course.

He's done with his shower a minute after I finish breakfast and wash the dishes.

Without any exchange, I take my turn to shower and prepare myself for the day ahead.

The choices I make during this Trial will determine quite possibly the future of the whole shinobi world. Naruto has become such a beacon for people all around who live in this disgusting world of ninja. Before becoming an adult, he already had converted various influential people to his Nindou. For a small time, I was one of many.

No matter how many he swayed, they were just side effects from chasing after me, just events on the path to having me come back to him.

Why have all of his roads lead to me? The same can't be said for my path, since I'm perfectly willing to throw him to the lions in my place while I leave Konoha behind forever. That's one road of mine that won't end with him.

Smoke is dissipating in the main room as I leave the bathroom. My eyes detect the movements and every detailed change in the atmosphere. I can see a small frog in the middle of the room before it's cleared. Knowing Naruto's history with frog summons, I relax my fighting position but stay tense as I await the Trial.

"Naruto-chan! 'Bout time you became Hokage!" the old, shriveled frog croaks.

Naruto looks like he's going to kiss the thing when he picks it up and spins around like a child.

"Fukasaku, you old bag! It's been forever! You look even more ancient than I remember!"

They kept exchanging banter until I lost my patience with either of the idiots.

"What's the Trial?" I manage to interject after Naruto gets done asking about someone named Shima, who's the frog's wife, I assume.

"Ah, thanks for reminding me!" Fukasaku exclaims and clears his throat.

It's taken him long enough to notice me. His gray eyebrows stretch far back when he finally looks in my direction.

"Why, you're the Uchiha boy Naruto talked about!" He laughs as though I would get some joke, "I tell ya, he was mourning Jiraiya-chan, but I swear he talked about you more than anybody else during break times!"

"Damn it, Fukasaku, shut up about that and answer his question. I wanna know, too! Are we fighting some bandits? Transporting a scroll? Protecting some feudal lord's daughter?"

He lists boring missions that we could've done as genin. Maybe he forgets what interesting missions are like now that the war is over.

"Nope, you're coming with me!"

And with that, I feel a strange popping sensation over my whole body, then another one before there's smoke again. The air is heavy with chakra that I can't place, so I know we've been reverse-summoned to somewhere I've never been before.

"Mount Myoboku missed you, Naruto-chan!" A female frog, who I believe is Shima, hops over and greets Naruto.

When she looks at me, her reaction is identical to Fukasaku's.

"Oh, wow, Naruto didn't even skim the surface when he mentioned how good you look! You are definitely an Uchiha, aren't you? That clan had some of the most beautiful men in the Fire Country, it did!" She stares blatantly as she hops around me.

"Ma, why do you even care about the beauty of a human, huh? Just trying to make me jealous, you are, I know it!" Fukasaku pouted and patted his wife on her purple curls.

"Just because I can't have it doesn't mean it's not worth looking! Whole point behind art museums, right?" She glances over at a small clock on the wall. "Oh, Pa, you're going to make them late! Follow me, boys! You need to go get your prophecy out of the way before we can start with the Fire Meditation."

Neither of us ever heard of Fire Meditation, and I'm not in the mood for prophetic bullshit. Regardless, we follow her through the colorful jungle of Mount Myoboku to an elaborate chamber where the oldest creature I've ever seen is awaiting us.

"You seem familiar, yes...yellow hair...stupid grin...Ah, you must be," The old frog slowly pointed at Naruto, but his finger dropped, "Nope, can't get it."

"Naruto, you old geezer. I'm Uzumaki Naruto. I'll say it again, maybe you'll remember it for the next time you see me. U-zu-ma-ki Na-ru-"

"Aahh, Uzumaki Naruto, I knew I would remember it eventually! My memory seems to be getting better lately, don't you think, Fukasaku-chan?" His laugh is watery and strained, and it's amplified by the stone walls surrounding us.

"No, Ojiji-sama, I think you're even more senile than the last time you saw Naruto-chan. It was just a year ago!" Fukasaku smiles as he chides the elder frog.

"And I've seen this other one in my prophecies for Naruto-chan. An Uchiha, by the looks of that fancy Sharingan you have there."

Naruto audibly pouts when I'm recognized by name.

"You can talk to the Uchiha boy after you tell them their prophecy. Naruto's going to become Hokage, right?" Fukasaku presses.

Ah, so this is the prophet. Should've figured it was going to be something idiotic like a senile frog. This is Naruto and Konoha, after all.

"Yeah, yeah, Hokage, Trials, I saw those things in my dream. Not certain that he'll do it since the instability of this Uchiha is muddling up their future. If he can stabilize, they will be the strongest duo this world has ever seen. If he continues on the path he thinks he's chosen, I'm afraid...aloe vera!"

Naruto nearly falls over at the stupid outburst. He slaps his own face, dragging his hand down past his eyes.

"What the hell does aloe vera have to do with this?" Naruto grumbles through his palm.

"No clue, but it has something to do with you two, and it's a doozy. Nope, no idea, but now you're getting me off-track."

He shakes his head at Naruto slowly, like it's Naruto's fault that he screams the first thing that comes to mind.

"Overall, it's up to this boy to decide your fate, Naruto, but you have the biggest hold on him. He's been promised to you by his brother, after all!"

What.

"Sasuke's promised to me? That doesn't even sound right!"

There's no way Itachi said anything to him!

"Itachi just said that he entrusted him to me, that I'm supposed to take care of Sasuke for him. Nothing was promised, Ojiji-sama!"

What?!

"We've heard the prophecy, why are we still standing here talking to some ancient toad?" I let my voice ice over in warning to all present.

"True, it's almost noon. Fire Meditation is always best done at noontime. Thank you very much for the prophecy! We'll be back later, Great Toad Sage!" Shima waved goodbye before ushering us out of the chamber.

I swear that I hear the old sage say something like "So that's what it's for!" as the large doors close behind us.

We're immediately accosted by two huge toads, one yellow and one brown. They also seem to be Naruto's friends and perhaps his summons, if I remember from back then.

"Naruto-nii! You finally got back that Uchiha you talked about so much! I swear, I was going to make you repay me for every second you wasted talking about this guy if you didn't do it, but you did! Congrats!"

Again? Did Naruto talk to every toad here about me, or what?

"Naruto-nii, did you bring any food?" The slow-sounding yellow one nudges Naruto, who just laughs and pats it.

"Sorry, Gamatatsu, it was a bit sudden. Gamakichi, I don't have any time to play today. Sasuke and I are supposed to be doing some Fire Meditation?" Naruto scratches the back of his head with the same hand he used to pat the oily frog. Ugh...

"You what?! You two are getting married? Now when did that happen? That explains everything, I'm so happy for you!"

What the hell . . . I'm done with this place.

"Married?! No, wait! Is that what the Fire Meditation is!?" Naruto screeches.

Naruto starts panicking, flailing, and blushing at the same time. I, on the other hand, give Shima two seconds to explain before I torch this jungle.

"No, no, that's not what the Fire Meditation is for today. Yes, Naruto, we usually have couples do the Fire Meditation as part of their wedding ceremony. The last time it was used for your purpose was your father and his Assistant. He also came here for his wedding with that lovely Kushina. But no wedding today," she jumps up on Naruto's shoulder and bumps him with her elbow, "Unless you boys want to kill two birds with one stone, hm?"

"Ha, yeah, funny, can we just forget all that?" Naruto flounders, and obviously tries to avoid my glare.

Fukasaku jumps on his other shoulder, getting ready to tease Naruto, too.

"Sure, when I asked you a while ago who you wanted to marry, it was a slip-up when you said Sasuke instead of that Sakura girl. Uh-huh," Really, Naruto has no limits to his idiocy, "But you know, slip-ups usually reveal what you're really feeling subconsciously."

"If we don't start right now, I might find that I have an insatiable craving for frog legs." My tone quiets the group of morons, and it's as though they just realized that I was there the entire time.

"Alright, alright, we're just teasing our Naruto-chan," Fukasaku yields, but dares to smirk at me, "But you know, we would approve of this."

He's hopping away before I can retort. He and his wife spend too much time drawing a large rune circle with markings that suggested Yin and Yang. When they're done, they pour oil on the line separating the two forces. They motion for us to sit on our respective sides, Yin being mine, and Naruto's Yang. This had been made clear to us during the war, so no discussion was necessary.

They wait until we're seated before lighting the oil. The flames rise to our shoulders. Naruto should only be able to see my head, whereas my Sharingan lets me still see him fully. He must not realize that I can, because he allows himself to start fidgeting in what might be worry.

It's understandable. After all, this is a Trial. There must be some way that this can go wrong.

"Now, everyone experiences different symbols. Usually, the ones getting married see red strings of fate. Your father reported seeing him and his Assistant making the seal of reconciliation. Whatever happens, it's your hearts communication. You'll just be observing. If you don't see anything symbolic of your bond being a success, or you don't see into each other's hearts at all, then Sasuke can not be your Assistant and you have not passed this Trial." The old female frog dictates the Trial to us.

After finishing the official explanation, Shima softens for Naruto. "Don't worry, Naruto-chan. You have to meditate like we showed you. You, too, Sasuke-chan."

Though I want to stay aware so we fail the test, it happens instantly when Naruto calms down and meets my gaze over the flames.

We are in the familiar white space where we've read each other's hearts on multiple occasions. The lights that resemble stars are shooting around us and twinkling above and beneath us. My heart sees Naruto standing meters or centimeters away from me, we are close and far apart at one time.

His bare body is standing before me, his skin glowing and flickering. His lower half is obscured by white fiery tongues.

A barrier of fire between us can't be a good representation for a bond, can it?

But the greatest symbol for a bond is present on us, and I want to refuse its existence. The red string of fate is connecting our little fingers. If that's present, then all that's around us is just supplemental proof of our bond.

This bond...this string, I know what it means, but it can't be possible. There must be several other possibilities of what this string could mean.

It's in horrible shape, so maybe that's a sign of the difference between this string and the one known through myths. It has black burn marks on my side, and looks ragged on his. The center of the string is stretched over the fire barrier.

I feel my heart as it opens its eyes and detaches itself from my thoughts and plans entirely. It focuses entirely on the glowing blue eyes across from it. They get larger and brighter as Naruto's heart is drawn towards mine.

The fire burns lower as he approaches, but all my heart watches is Naruto's smiling face.

He has me lift my tied hand so he can give me one end of a gold wire. Together, we tie off the damaged parts of the red string, leaving only a centimeter on each side. With that, he extends two fingers to me, and I take them in my own. Searing pain snaps us back to reality.

It's our physical bodies that are making the seal of reconciliation through a very physical fire.

Naruto pulls away in a flash, while I rip myself away from the fire. Neither of us leave the large circle, but as to whether we did that consciously, I'm not sure.

Like waking up from a dream, it's a dizzying feeling to suddenly go from a meditative state to an aware one. I can't seem to remember where we are.

"Naruto, Sasuke, are you okay?" Shima asks, but Fukasaku jumps in before either of us answer.

"We don't know if that was a good sign or not, really. We've never seen the physical bodies react while they're meditating. Were you doing that in the vision?"

"Yeah, that part was like the first time I read Sasuke. We did it back then without knowing what it was completely." As he speaks, Naruto's voice is deep and smooth with only a hint of the roughness he has in his usual voice.

What could he have seen to make him sound like that? I don't like what it does to me.

"That part? What were the other parts?" The female frog tries to prod the information out of Naruto, but he becomes uncharacteristically silent at her question.

The frogs give each other looks like they were assuming the worst. There's no reason for him to be keeping quiet about what we saw. I could try looking at it in every way possible, but there is no doubt that it was a positive vision. For him, at least.

"I don't know why he's being silent. He should be bragging about it," I scoff.

If they would just speak up, Naruto would tell them everything. So, I'm just trying to not have my time wasted. That's all, nothing more.

"Yeah, I should, really. We had this messed up red string connecting our fingers. We walked towards each other, and then we tied a gold wire around the string. It was like we were tying off all of the parts that were bad. After we tied it, Sasuke, he . . . he was crying and smiling at the same time."

Naruto avoids my gaze when he describes how I appeared in the vision.

"Also, where the hell were our clothes?! Whenever we would go into that white space, we looked how we did in the physical world," Naruto asks the question that has been nagging the back of my mind.

"I've heard of that, actually. It happened for the wedding Fire Meditation for your father and mother. They didn't know what exactly it symbolized, either. I suspect that it shows you were baring your hearts completely to each other. The much more important part is that red string you're talking about!" Fukasaku tries to turn the subject to that damn string, but he doesn't get any further than mentioning it.

"Yeah, I could probably sit here and ask you to figure out what it all meant, but I wanna get to that first Trial!" Naruto declares as he throws his hands behind his head and shifts all his weight to one leg.

The flames between us roar before dying out completely. It scares Naruto out of his ridiculous pose.

"What are you talking about, Naruto? That was the Soul Trial. You two already passed. In fact, you may be a better match than you know!" Shima giggles and her eyebrows waggle suggestively.

When he hears that he's one step closer to becoming Hokage, Naruto is stupid enough to backflip in celebration and then wrap an arm around my neck.

"Stop choking me, you idiot! Don't touch me!" My protests go unheeded, so I jam an elbow into his solar plexus. He quickly obeys me after that.

"You said this was the Soul Trial," I ask, shifting my focus from the idiot dangling off me in pain to the frogs on the ground, "What are the other Trials? There are twelve more, correct?"

"Well, you're allowed to know. The first Hokage had a deep respect for Yin and Yang, but he also placed a lot of weight behind the twelve Zodiacs. Plus, the Trials needed to be able to last for as long as the village was standing, so they had to be flexible enough to fit into any time period. Therefore, the Trials are chosen based on their relation to the Zodiac!" Fukasaku gives me his long-winded answer.

Great, a theme. That really makes this seem way more legitimate.

"Makes sense to me, and I like the Zodiac!" And, of course, Naruto's all for it. Like always.

"If we're done here, I have things to attend to. Transport us back," I demand.

It's a simple request, but it gets shot down by the increasingly annoying frog couple.

"Hey, while you're here, why don't you learn to meditate with the best? Naruto-chan here learned in a short time what was impossible for Jiraiya-chan, which is how to calm down and center himself entirely. You could probably do for some realignment, Sasuke-chan. Go ahead, you two! We'll just head back home and we'll send you back," His wide mouth smirks at me," Eventually."

I make a move to threaten him again, but Naruto stops me by the shoulder as they disappear. Glancing towards him, I notice the light scars on his large hand. Since when did his hands become larger than mine? And if I look back . . . he's taller than me. Barely, but I see it.

"Oi! I'm taller than you!"

Leave it to him to be able to know what I'm thinking for my momentary lapses into pointless thoughts.

"Explainable by you being able to eat, train, and move around properly, and I not having any of those things," I hiss, making no effort to hide my annoyance.

"I didn't mean anything by it, Sasuke. Forget I said anything and come sit down. I'm sure you know how to meditate, right?" With nothing to it, he drops onto the ground and starts meditating.

Every trace of the Naruto from my past is replaced entirely with this new Naruto. When he's aware, he's still an idiot, but when he's concentrating with such tranquility . . . I don't know what to think.

There were two constants about Naruto- His voluntary stupidity, and his obsession with getting me back. I thought any interest in me left when he let me rot in that prison. Now, it's like he switched once he saw me again.

This usuratonkachi . . . he's showing me who Uzumaki Naruto is. In return, he wants to get to know Uchiha Sasuke. Not Uchiha Sasuke the Avenger from the past. He wants the true me, the Sasuke I can be now that I'm free from revenge, hatred, and prison.

But who is that?


	3. Rat Trial: Disapproval

**Warnings: Slurs, alcohol use, sexual harassment**

* * *

><p><em>Trial 2: Disapproval<em>

Damn, I must've been meditating for hours; the sun is already in the west. Well, well, well, it seems like I wasn't the only one. Unlike me, Sasuke relaxes when he's in deep meditation, so he's not frowning and his eyebrows aren't furrowed like mine do. If he shaved his hair, which I really wouldn't recommend, he'd look like a monk.

It's a bit mean to interrupt him when he seems so at peace, but we have to get to Konoha to report our Trial before we get the next one tomorrow. A small pat on his shoulder pulls him out of focus, but he doesn't jump.

Lucky! I always seem to fall off of things when someone wakes me up.

"It's almost night," He points out once he pries his eyes open. It's not fair, he stands up even more gracefully than he normally does! Anyway, the bastard's right, but I thought it first!

"I know that, that's why I stopped you. We have to go make our report. It's not too late, the old geezers shouldn't be sleeping. We can even get Fukasaku to send us straight to Konoha!"

Speak of the slimy devil, Fukasaku hops over a bush and over to us.

"No problem! You guys behave, now. Shima and I will see you at at your inauguration!" He beams, then makes a hand seal.

I have just enough time to wave good-bye before Sasuke and I are covered in a white cloud. When we walk through it, the gates of Konoha are right in front of us. Without thinking, I start walking straight onto the ramp leading into Konoha. Sasuke doesn't follow me.

"Oh, right," I mutter and scratch the back of my head.

Normally, I'd suggest we take some precautions with letting the villagers see Sasuke, but the idea of hiding it like I'm ashamed of him bothers me. Nope, not gonna happen. I'm not gonna let them shun Sasuke the same way they did to me. Maybe they'll be okay, since I'm considered a hero. That's gotta count for something!

"Nope, we're walking straight through. Come on," I call, motioning for him to come along.

I continue walking without waiting for him. Soon, I hear his quiet footsteps following behind me.

Maybe his uncertainty isn't completely unfounded. When we pass by shops, the conversation lowers to a quiet buzz. Some store owners are even glaring at him. People on the streets stay to the outer edges as we walk through. The weirdest thing is that some people seem to be glaring at _me._

But since nobody stops us, we enter the Hokage Tower and request a meeting with the elders. The wait isn't too long, but it's unsettling to have conversations suddenly stop as workers spot us. To be honest, I only relax when I'm sitting in front of the elders! Fuckin' A, that's so backwards. Granny Tsunade's not even here!

"We assume this is about your first Trial. You seem relaxed, Naruto. It must've gone well," Mitokado remarks.

Is it just me, or does Mitokado seem to be the nicer one?

"Don't get ahead of yourself, Mitokado. They have to give their report," Koharu sneers.

Yup, I was right.

"Alright, here it is. We got transported to Mount Myoboku by Fukasaku, and we received a prophecy from the Great Toad Sage. We also did the Fire Meditation and got positive results from that. So, are we done here?" I speak quickly but clear enough.

"What was this prophecy?" Koharu directs all her questions to me, but maybe that's for the best.

Sasuke doesn't seem to be doing so good, or at least, he's a bit more tense than usual.

"He said that Sasuke and I would become the most powerful duo, as long as Sasuke can stabilize himself. That, and something about aloe vera."

Before they can open their mouths, I finish, "Don't ask me, the old toad has said some weird things before. They all came true, but in weird ways."

"Did you see your bond during the Fire Meditation?" Mitokado asks, and in response, my stomach grumbles.

"Yeah, yeah, it seemed in better shape. Look, we've only eaten crappy oatmeal all day. We wanna go eat! Can we be done here?"

I don't think my whining makes me seem like a better candidate for Hokage, but I've always hated reporting. It's just saying the same shit that just happened, like trying to explain to someone who just came in what's going on in the movie you're trying to watch.

Sasuke doesn't seem to be enjoying it either, and I'm sure he's as hungry as I am.

"First you come in unexpectedly at such a late hour, then you think you can end the meeting yourself! Hasn't anybody told you to respect your elders?" Koharu yells, her cheeks getting all red and puffy.

Heh, this is fun!

"Sorry, I missed out on a lot of life lessons when I was a kid. By the way, this new table's nice," I smirk, knowing I've won when Koharu rolls her eyes .

"That'll be all, Naruto, Sasuke. Prepare yourself for the next Trial. They won't all be as easy as that first one," With that, Mitokado sends us off.

* * *

><p>Though I seemed confident about going to eat, I have no clue where we can go. Everyone seems so weird about Sasuke.<p>

But before I can make any plans of action, Sakura runs up to us. Giving Sasuke a once-over, she makes it obvious that she is also a bit hesitant about having Sasuke free and in Konoha. She has forgiven him for what he's done, but she's always been a wary kunoichi. Maybe she thinks he's back to being an avenger now that he was thrown in jail.

However, she always seems to be on my side, so I know that I just have to give her some time to get used to it.

"I'm glad I found you guys before any of them did. Look, come out eating with me. I think I know one place that should be pretty free of those people."

The hell is she talking about? Instead of saying it myself, Sasuke asks it in better words.

"Who are 'those people'?"

I'm proud of Sakura, really. When she's addressed by Sasuke for the first time in a long, stressful while, she keeps her cool and looks directly into his red eyes.

"The theorists. You wouldn't believe some of the ideas about you two that I've heard. I'll tell you more when we get to the bar. These streets aren't the safest for you two," she whispers hurriedly as she directs us down an alley.

I have a million questions at once, but the least important one always seems to be what comes out.

"A bar? We're only eighteen!"

Oh, what the hell, my age was never an issue to me before. I mean, I stole porn mags to perfect my Sexy no Jutsu when I was eleven! Why can't I ask proper questions like Sasuke?

"They don't have the highest standards at this place. Just ask Kiba, he celebrates the end of any hard mission at the Paper Bag," Sakura replies.

Sounds real classy.

"Alright, we'll go. They better have good food there!" I nearly shout, but Sakura shushes me.

She leads us down a few alleys into an earlier built area of Konoha. I remember it enough, since a termite infestation took out a few of the new buildings here.

One of the houses that was supposed to be knocked down is still standing. It has a warped board messily nailed above the door, and scrawled on this board is 'The Paper Bag'.

"This village is hardly a year old and it already has seedy hole-in-the-walls."

Sasuke makes a good point, but I'm pretty glad to see the village getting some character back.

And this bar is full of characters, alright. The wooden bar looks like it was attacked by a mob of three-year-olds armed with crayons and juice. None of the bar stools match, neither do any of the plates and cups. A mismatched selection of cheap booze lined one wall, and the rest were covered in posters and paintings in an attempt to cover the termite damage. The few tables the bar could fit seemed to be nailed and glued together from the remnants of the other termite-ruined buildings.

He might be crazy, but you have to admire the guts it takes for the owner to keep this shithole running.

A burly woman who had been serving drinks behind the bar comes up to us, wiping her hands on a moth-eaten rag.

"Naruto, eh? Heard o' you before. Call me Sweetie. This other guy's with you?" She asks in the deepest, huskiest voice I've ever heard.

When Sweetie gives Sasuke a once-over, she spends way too much time staring at his crotch. She proves to be like many women when a blush splotches her face.

Damn it, Sasuke, stop being so attractive and hot to everybody!

"No, no, Naruto! He can keep on being as hot as he wants!" Sweetie chuckles, but it sounds like a bear grumbling.

Fuckin' A, I said it out loud again! Oh man, Sasuke's got an eyebrow raised...

"Please, take a seat! It's on the house. Make sure you drink plenty and come talk to me later, okay?" Sweetie suggests with a discolored grin.

She makes sure Sasuke sees her winking before she returns to the drunks at the bar. Once she's gone, Sasuke looks at me again. Thinking fast, I plop down at an empty table and instantly regret it. The cushion might as well be a rag between me and the hard wood floor. Sakura and Sasuke both make faces when they sit down on their crappy pillows, too.

An old, nearly toothless guy comes to take our order. I don't plan on drinking, so we just get some cheap food. Sakura finally speaks up once Sasuke and I start eating.

"I've heard all the different rumors in the hospital. I know there's no way any of it is true, but it doesn't take much to rile up these villagers. Think about it, they found out about Danzo, Root, and many other dark secrets about Konoha. The end of the war and the rebuilding made everyone want to work together and be peaceful, but hearing about you and Sasuke working together was like opening the floodgates. Now, all of a sudden, everyone's coming up with different ideas about what's going on." She reveals with clear distress in her voice.

With every word, I get more seriously pissed off. Sasuke doesn't deserve this bad of a reception!

"What's their deal about Sasuke? The war is over, he's with us now, what more do they want?"

I thought I was still hungry after I finished my food, but I've lost my appetite now.

"That's just the thing, Naruto. It's not just Sasuke they have a problem with," she murmurs and looks up at me.

Her gentle stare makes it pretty damn obvious who they're suspicious about.

After all I've done, it just takes one choice to have them back to hating me again? Kurama and I are friends and we won't hurt anyone! Really, I still haven't gotten rid of the stigma attached to being a Jinchuuriki? Not even saving the whole fucking world changed their minds? What does it take? I swear, I'll do anything if it would just work for once!

"What about the other ninja? Kakashi, the rest of the rookies, what do they think?" Sasuke asks, and I feel a pool of dread form in my stomach.

"Kakashi hasn't been back to hear the news, yet. As for the rookies, they're still on your side, but I can tell that some of them are concerned about the theories." She sighs and runs a hand through her pink hair.

It can't be easy telling us this, but that's obvious since her eyes are starting to shine with tears.

"So, what are the theories you've heard?" I ask through my gritted teeth.

"One says that it seemed convenient that you have built up a reputation as a hero right after Sasuke left and became a missing nin. They think that you two plotted everything that happened from the Chuunin exams onward. That all includes getting Orochimaru involved, you winning against Neji, and Sasuke's actions. They think it was so that you could seem to be the hero who changes people and brings peace. Then, once you 'change' him, Sasuke would be allowed back into the village."

"What a load of bullshit!" I growl, and get quieted down by both Sasuke and Sakura.

Sakura continues, "When they heard that Sasuke had been in jail instead of out on his journey, they started to theorize that you were having him stay in there to be protected by Root until you could become Hokage."

Though it sounds ridiculous to me, I can see how some people might piece things together like that.

"They believe that you both hold strong grudges against this village, that you want to run it into the ground. But really," she pauses, looking away from us, "I think everyone is afraid of how powerful you two are when you're together. The war stories from when you started working together have become legendary because of how ungodly strong of a team you make. They think you could not only destroy Konoha, but all of the ninja villages!"

"They're all idiots. They think that we somehow made such a complex plan for world domination when we were twelve? There are so many instances where a plan like that could've gone wrong. No, they don't know anything," Sasuke scoffs.

I may be the one whose reputation is falling the farthest, but Sasuke already doesn't have high hopes for this village. If they make him hate it even more, there's no way he'll want to work as my Assistant!

"Is that the worst of them?" I ask her, but really, what could be worse than this?

"Oi! Yer zat U-zu-ma-ki Naruto guy, huh?"

Some greasy drunk guy is tripping his way over to our table. What the hell could he want?

"This other ass, yeah you! Yer that Sasuke ev'ryone's talkin' 'bout, huh?" He grunts and points a filthy finger at Sasuke, "So whazzis I hear 'bout you guys bein' fags since ya two were twelve, yeah?"

Who the fuck does this guy think he is?!

"Ya know wha' I heard? Heh, they're all sayin', no shit, zat you, fuckin' Uchiha fag, zat you suh-...sedu...got all gay and shit with Naruto! Now, I be one of dem who think you guys made all yer lil plans, but some guys are sayin' it was all yer idear, U-chi-ha!"

Sasuke's Sharingan spins faster with every word the drunk slurs. The guy lets out a few wheezing laughs before spewing some more bullshit.

"So whazzit, blondie? Izzat Sasuke guy dat good a fuck? Yer gonna shit on yer village jus' so ya can fuck 'im? Fuckin' fags!"

I'm surprised Sasuke lasted this long, but that asshole really deserved the broken jaw.

Sakura's too shocked to move for a second, but I see her start healing the guy before I follow Sasuke, who's storming out of the bar.

"Sasuke, wait up, seriously!" I call out as I slam the door behind me.

He's not running, so I rush to grab hold of his arm. His reaction is to whip around and drag me closer to him by my collar.

"You really thought this through, didn't you? Let alone the fact that I can choose to fuck you over at any moment, you have to worry that these idiots won't accept you as Hokage since they think you're plotting something with me!"

"Look, I get that you're not used to the villagers hating you, but I sure as hell am. I know from experience that they will come around if you just prove to them that you're not a monster! That's all we have to do, okay?"

His grip loosens slightly, but I get closer instead of backing off, "In the meanwhile, they'll just have to deal with us working together."

"Get away from me before somebody thinks that drunk's theory has any merit," He growls and pushes me away.

Caught off-guard, I stumble a bit at the force.

"I'm going back to the inn. Their staring is driving me insane," he hisses and stalks off.

Ya know, you can't be driven when you're already there, bastard!

"Well, it's not like I'm gonna try staying here!" I grumble and follow Sasuke up the ramp and through the gates.

Another figure is coming towards us, but it's hard to make them out now that it's night. It's not until I see the tell-tale weird hairstyle that I know just who it is.

"It's nice to see you two together again. It's almost nostalgic," Kakashi smiles, I can tell, but who the hell knows with that mask of his.

"We wouldn't be together again if Sasuke had been put to death! What the hell were you thinking, letting them put Sasuke in jail?" I snarl at my old teacher.

I refuse to believe this would happen.

"Believe me, Naruto; I was fed the same story you were. I never expected that they would go this far," Kakashi sighs and crosses his arms.

"But they did! They threw him in jail without even telling you, the Hokage! Don't tell me they can just get away with that?"

I try to keep my voice to a dull roar. Sasuke, on the other hand, is staying completely silent.

"It's complicated, Naruto. The power structure in the villages isn't as clear-cut as people think. I'm just glad you're okay, Sasuke. I can only say I'm sorry for what they did."

"What they did? Are you referring to throwing me in jail or ordering my brother to murder my family? And these are the people you're letting run the village?" Sasuke seethes, but keeps himself away from Kakashi.

"As I said, it's not so clear-cut like that. You two will find out if you pass your Trials. Speaking of which, I'll be leading you to your next one," Kakashi informs us before turning back around to start walking out of the village.

With no other options, we follow him.

"Trial? I thought we were getting that tomorrow?" Sasuke mutters and adjusts the headband around his neck when he catches Kakashi looking at it.

"I thought I'd save you a trip and have you spend the night at the casino. The room is already bought and paid for. So, come on, we can still make it there at a decent hour if we hurry."

"Casino? We're staying at a _casino_? I didn't even know there were any of those in the Fire Country!" Not only that, what the hell could a Trial be if it's at a casino?

"Well, where else do you think Tsunade-hime loses most of her money?"

We talk louder as we start jumping through the trees. I groan when I think of what this Trial could be.

"Don't tell me this Trial is getting the Hokage out of paying her debt to a casino," Sasuke sneers.

Even he's pissed at the idea that these Trials might not be any challenge to us at all!

"No, no, there's a different objective. This is the Rat Trial, so it deals with you two going undercover as spies. Your target the owner of the King Coin Casino and his mistress, Lady Chance, who's a popular high-roller. The owner goes by the alias of Big Dealer, and not much is known about him other than his interest in money, gaudy jewelry, and attractive women."

"So, what, we have to kill them? I thought we were spies, not assassins!" I protest, catching up to Kakashi.

To be honest, I'm still squeamish about the idea of killing someone. It's weird for a ninja, but I don't think I've killed a single person myself. Our whole war was against zombies, really, so there wasn't a chance there. If someone has died during one of my missions, it was usually by someone else's hand. I hope I never have to.

"No. They're both targets because it's up to you two to win over Big Dealer and Lady Chance. Naruto, you'll have to use your Sexy no Jutsu form for this one, and you'll go under the alias Diamonds. Sasuke, you're Spades," Kakashi briefs us like any team Captain should.

"Who are you, then?" Sasuke asks while I try to get over being named something as silly as Diamonds.

"I'm nobody, since I'm going straight back to Konoha once we get there."

Kakashi is quick with his responses, but he still hasn't gotten around to telling us the important part!

"Okay, fine, we don't need your help anyway. Or, at least, I don't think so since you haven't even told us what we're doing!" I grumble, sounding more like my younger, brattier self.

"I see you haven't figured out how to be patient. I hope Sasuke can balance that out in you when he's your Assistant," He tries to drag on, but Sasuke and I growl at him.

He shrugs, unfazed, "Or, maybe not. Anyway, your objective is to get the two pieces to Rummy's Mask without causing alarm while you're there. You'll know who Big Dealer and Lady Chance are by seeing what two people are wearing half a mask. Unfortunately, that's all I can tell you."

Damn, it seems so boring!

Nobody says another word until we're outside of the neon casino town. It's built around a skyscraper that has a huge marquee wrapping around it. The marquee has these rainbow words scroll across the screen: KING COIN CASINO! COME SEE LADY CHANCE AND BIG DEALER! PLAY HIGH-STAKES POKER, ROULETTE, BLACK JACK, AND ALL YOUR GAMBLING FAVORITES!

Kakashi produces two dress bags from his back pack. One is a sleek, black suit for Sasuke, and the other is a shimmery white dress for my Sexy no Jutsu form. I transform and change into the dress and matching heels, but I feel a bit bare. Using the Transformation Jutsu again, I add a diamond choker that covers my neck in dangling rows of sparkles. I add a little bling on my wrist and...there, that should make me look rich enough for the Big Dealer!

Okay, fine, maybe I just like dressing up. It's not every day that I get to be "Naruko", as I call her. To be honest, I've spent so much time perfecting this jutsu that she's become a part of me. Some days, I will wake up and feel like being her for a while. To me, it's like being myself, just in a different way. I don't know how else to describe it, really.

One time, I left my apartment as Naruko in order to train. I was fully dressed and I wasn't planning any pranks, but I still got called a pervert! So, I don't go out as her anymore. I mean, it's obvious that she's supposed to be me! I wouldn't perv on myself! Sure, I'm hot as Naruko, but I'm hot as Naruto, too! I don't get why people have to be so weird about it.

Anyway, once I'm done admiring my own hotness, I look over to check on Spades.

I regret it immediately.

Sasuke didn't have to do anything special other than put on the suit and keep the silky black undershirt unbuttoned half way. Instant dreamy dark prince. Damn it all. Just, damn.

After he sees me decked out in diamonds, Sasuke transforms and gives himself a short necklace. It has a stylized spade pendant carved out of a shiny black stone. It's onyx, I think, though I don't know much about gems and stones. What I do know is that it looks so damn good against his ivory skin.

Once we're finished dressing, we head out to the casino without Kakashi. Now that he's not around, I can't help but stare openly at Sasuke.

"You know, Spades, I wonder why you aren't going by Black Jack. You look like something I'd want in my hand," I giggle in my new, feminine voice.

Fuckin' A, am I really gonna try to flirt with Sasuke of all people? Besides, in what universe would a shitty pick-up line work on an Uchiha?

Sasuke chuckles under his breath and it completely blows my mind. When I look up in surprise, he catches my eye and . . . _w__inks_ at me.

MAYDAY! MAYDAY! ABORT MISSION! My face is going numb with all the blood rushing around in it! What the hell was I thinking?!

Since I'm just _slightly_ distracted, I only notice the huge bouncer in front of me when I run straight into his rock hard chest.

"Names." As he asks for ours, I notice that this mountain of a man has a name tag.

"Well," I flirt as well as I can while being ominously stared down, "It's very nice to meet you, Black Jack. I'm Diamonds. My friend here, he goes by Spades! Suits him, right? Get it? Suits?"

Sasuke places a hand on my back that not-so-subtly means, "Stop that. Now."

Black Jack spends another minute glaring at us, but then he grunts and lets us into the shining King Coin Casino. He must appreciate puns more than tight-ass Sasuke does . . .

"So, I guess that's why you're not Black Jack, huh? What a faux pas, two people in a casino going by the same overused nickname!" I snicker under my breath.

"Good thing I didn't have to compete for the title," Sasuke murmurs. My loud snort of laughter nearly blows my cover.

Sasuke regains our disguise by putting an arm around my waist and whispering into my ear.

"Look, I should have said this earlier, but my part is easy. Nobody will notice if I use my Sharingan."

Playing along, I stroke my fingers along his jawline. Tilting my head the same seductive way I've seen in movies, I whisper back to him, "I'm glad you've decided to play with me, Spades."

Sasuke's face becomes blank for a moment, but he starts smirking as Spades.

My whisper transforms into a sensual purr, "Just remember that you're not supposed to look suspicious. You have to get her attention and flirt enough with her so that the people around her aren't shocked when she goes off with you."

Putting on his poker face, Sasuke searches the crowd for a woman wearing a mask. All he sees is a dense crowd over near the roulette tables.

"Alright, she's probably over there. Let's just get her attention and then go to our room. If I can make eye contact, I'll make sure she remembers me enough to call me over tomorrow. I'll also try to use it to make her think you and I are high rollers that she's heard about," Sasuke murmurs his plans to me.

I have to take a moment to grin to myself. Sasuke's really gonna help me! I can almost hear Shikamaru telling me to think about Sasuke's motives, but hey, I didn't doubt Sasuke before and I'm not gonna start now!

We push through a thinner part of the crowd until we can see the woman who is obviously Lady Chance. Not only is everyone mesmerized by her, but she's got a gigantic pile of chips in front of her!

Lady Chance is an attractive redhead that's decked out in lots of gold jewelry. Her black, low-cut dress keeps no secrets. The most interesting part of her appearance, though, is the ornate black and gold mask she wears on the left side of her face.

So this is who Sasuke has to flirt with, huh?

Hmph. Nevermind, she's not that pretty. I'm not glaring, nope.

"I'm done, let's go," Sasuke orders and takes my arm and leads me to the wide velvet stairs in the back of the casino.

"About time," I grumble, fiddling with my bracelet.

"Good acting, usuratonkachi. You didn't even drool when you saw her." Though he's sort-of praising me, he's still speaking dryly. "Actually, you managed to look jealous of her."

"Uh, yeah."

I didn't look jealous, stupid Sasuke!

Once again, I have to pull myself together before my pouting draws too much attention. With some guidance from signs, we find our way to the room that Kakashi reserved for us. It's only after we change clothes that we notice there's only one bed. It's fairly large, though, so we only argue about it for a minute.

"At least change back into your normal form," He asks, and I take a second to think about what could happen if someone were to come in. As though he read my mind, he takes the Do Not Disturb sign and hangs it on the other side of the door. Once he shuts it, I'm out of the transformation and sprawled on the bed.

"Fine, but now you can't call me Diamonds or I'll punch you," I laugh quietly as Sasuke shakes his head at me. I don't know if it's the rush of being on a mission or what, but I feel playful.

"Move, you're on my side of the bed," He orders with a dismissive flick of his hand.

He's always so _demanding!_ What I wouldn't do to melt him a bit . . .

"You should be nicer to me, Spades, or I won't want to play with you anymore," I purr.

It's really scary to hear my normal voice like that, seriously! It must've caught Sasuke off-guard, too, since I can see a light blush forming on his neck.

"Go to bed, dobe. Preferably away from me," he hisses at me, but it's weak.

"But Spades, I wouldn't want you to get cold," I drawl, weighing my voice down with as much suggestion as possible.

Maybe I'm just hearing things, but I think Sasuke's breath just hitched. Of course, I did just move so that my warm breath is hitting his neck.

"E-enough!"

Did Uchiha Sasuke just stutter?

In order to escape my teasing, he bends in half with his legs laying flat. I slap his back jokingly before rolling over to my side of the bed. Once he's sure I'm on the other side, he flies under the covers with his back facing me.

I knew it, that guy hates it when he's being made fun of. Though, I don't remember him getting so flustered when we were younger. Weird!

* * *

><p>That's the last thought I have before I'm opening my eyes in the morning. I didn't dream, which is how it usually is during missions for me.<p>

Speaking of missions, I turn back into Diamonds and get myself dressed before Sasuke's done showering. I get in there and figure out it was stupid of me to get into a dress before taking a leak. By lifting up the dress and letting go of a part of my transformation, I'm able to get ready for my debut as Big Dealer's new mistress. A gross shiver runs down my spine when I think about it, though I haven't even seen the guy yet.

"Let's go, Diamonds," Sasuke says through the door, and I'm out in a second. We make the trek down to the casino hall.

I'd have to be blind to not be able to see the flashing and clashing mess that's sitting on a throne. He's flanked by busty women serving him drinks or fanning him. The guy even has a jeweled cane with a carved die topper.

Yup, this is Big Dealer, who definitely lives up to his name. His purple- and green-striped shirt is looks like it's bursting at the seams. The buttons are holding on for dear life! To top it off, every single sausage finger is being choked purple by gold rings. Those fingers pinch and slap at every ass that passes by his throne.

Do I really have to flirt with this guy? Fuckin' A!

Sasuke splits from me once he sees Lady Chance's crowd, leaving me to approach Big Dealer alone. I strut up the long carpet up to the throne, secretly glad that I've had some practice in heels.

Some part of me gets his attention; my baby blues, my golden hair, or maybe my fancy diamond choker?

Nope, he's already staring at my tits. Damn, I knew this was going to be too simple.

"Well, who do we have here?" He slurs, waggling an overgrown eyebrow at me.

"Oh no, you don't know me?" I walk up much closer, laying one of my small hands on his knee. Bending over a little, I give him a fantastic view of my cleavage, "Well, we just have to fix that, don't we? I'm Diamonds, and I know who you are. Big Dealer."

I let my hand slide to his meaty thigh as I sensually form his name with my pouty lips.

"Well, I'd certainly like to get to know you better. My suite, perhaps?"

Yeah, I'm sure you're just going to ask about my childhood, if your obvious boner's any indication. I know I'm strong enough to avoid getting violated, but that doesn't stop me from getting Sasuke's attention before following Big Dealer to his suite.

His room is no different from our's, except for the addition of gaudy statues and paintings. Also, his bed is heart-shaped. This guy is as subtle as a kick to the crotch.

"You don't seem like a stupid girl. You know what I want, right? So, what's your price?"

I wrack my brain, knowing that if I just ask for his mask, he might suspect something.

"Oh, I feel horrible for saying it, but I . . . I want to be your mistress! That Lady Chance, she's nothing compared to me, darling. My estate is worth three times as much as hers, but here she is, wearing that mask instead of me!" I moan and run my hands over the front of his shirt.

"Oh, well, Big Dealer can have a few mistresses at once," I curse inwardly when he squeezes my ass.

"But she's the only one with a mask," I pout, pressing my breasts against his even softer chest. This, in turn, also makes him harder against my leg.

"Honey, I could buy you as many masks as you want," Damn, this isn't going the way I planned. I probably have to take a more direct route. I don't want this to go on any longer!

"Okay, baby. So, are we going to play around?" I ask with one eyebrow raised suggestively.

Big Dealer chuckles before pulling me towards the bed. He lays down on it, then motions to have me come closer. Finally, I give my last idea a whirl.

"You know what really turns me on?" I breathe, crawling up to him from the end of the bed, "When my man relaxes and lets me do all the work. I just get so hot when I see a man tied to a bed. Oh, please. It'll be the best you've ever had, babe," I strain my voice with lustiness.

Meanwhile, my insides want to be what lays on top of this jerk. Better puke than me.

"Fine, as long as it doesn't cost extra," he growls, pulling me on top of him.

While he's slobbering all over my cleavage, I take a pillowcase and tie his hands behind the bars of his head board.

"You know what else I like?"

I'm getting so damn tired of acting sexy. How do they keep it up for so long in porn?

"What, c'mon, what!" He grunts into my breasts.

He's starting to get impatient with me, but I've got him where I want him. I take his face in my hands and pull him away from my chest.

"Blindfolding my man is hot, too." I giggle and finally get that mask off of him and onto myself.

I screech and fall back as strange chakra pumps into me. I whip it off and stare at Big Dealer, who got shocked into sleep by the sudden absence of the mask. I wish I could check his pulse to see if he's still alive, but I can't move my body where I want it to go for some reason?

Mmm, everything feels so soft now, so nice. I just want to lay down. Or something, whatever, I have to find Sasuke! So foggy . . . that's the door, okay. I stumble out and fall straight into someone who smells very, very nice.

"Hey, babe," I have to keep up my Diamonds act, right?

"Dobe, let go of me. I got the mask, we should get out of here. She fell asleep when I took it off. We were in her room, so no one saw. It's only a matter of time before someone goes looking for her."

"I know, alright, sure," I press myself into him until he's backed up against the wall, "But why are we in a rush? It's nice here, isn't it? Such a nice place."

His neck is so pale and smooth and soft, and it tastes good, too...wait, wha-?

"What the hell are you doing!?" Sasuke growls, pushing me away.

I stumble and fall on my ass. The floor is a fluffy carpet, so I run my hands all over it. Oh, I feel like I could fall asleep on it . . .

* * *

><p>I don't remember anything after that. I wake up by a fire and hear Kakashi and Sasuke's voices. Once I get full control of my senses, I realize that I'm not a girl anymore and I'm wearing normal clothing.<p>

"Finally awake, Naruto?" Kakashi checks, and I slowly nod my head.

It takes me a second to think of what caused my weirdness at the casino. I stretch and crawl towards the fire that's in the center of the camp.

"That mask, it has some weird chakra drug or something," I slur as I shiver against the cold night air.

"You never told me why we needed the masks, Kakashi," Sasuke calmly reminds our annoying teacher.

"It doesn't matter, they just need to be destroyed," Kakashi dismisses us and picks up the mask pieces that were laying on the ground in front of him.

With no warning, the two halves that Sasuke and I worked and flirted and got drugged for were thrown into the fire!

There was no keeping calm after that.


	4. Ox Trial: Differences

**Disclaimer: Fuckin A, I don't own Naruto or Sasuke :(**

_Trial 3: Differences_

It doesn't take long for me to convince Naruto that we should sneak in and out of the village when we report our success to the elders. Throughout his entire recount of his time with Big Dealer, he's gagging and groaning about what he had to do. It's hard for me to keep a straight face through it, too, so I can't blame him for acting childishly disgusted. I avoided all contact with Lady Chance, so my report isn't nearly as cringe-worthy.

Without even asking to check in with Sakura, Naruto leads us out of the village via the Hokage mountain. Dobe's silent, but I can't put my finger on what's wrong with him. I'd go for the obvious and say that he's bothered by the villagers hating him again, but he's not as easy to read as he used to be.

Not that I have any particular need for reading him. Knowing what he's feeling isn't going to change what I do or say.

"How many times a day do you think of leaving me?" Something like that, really?

"I figured something was wrong. But why torture yourself with the answer to that?" Naruto has two settings when he's upset, I've learned. He's either immobile and dark, or pissed off and in my face. The latter is much more comfortable, despite the fact that I'd tear anybody else to pieces if they dared to get so close to me. Inevitably, if we're fighting, there's going to be eye contact and the grabbing of clothes. In this case, it's the headband around my neck and Naruto's jacket.

"It's important!" His growl has improved over the years. Where there used to be whining, there's now rough malice. I feel myself smirking as my anticipation and excitement build.

"To you, maybe," My goading smirk and calm voice laced with contempt nearly send Naruto over the edge. He catches himself by gritting his teeth.

"That's just it. Nothing's important to you! You just do what you're told until you don't feel like it anymore. I've been waiting for that, Sasuke. We're going on our third Trial together, so when is it going to happen, huh? When you know it's going to hurt the most? When I trust you? When I need you!?" He shoves me down with his other hand, but my grip on him brings him down, too. We don't miss a beat. He's kneeling between my legs, pulling me up by the metal of my headband. I'm regretting how I'm wearing this damn thing.

"When did you ever not trust me? And you always seem to need me," Laughing sarcastically, I place both hands casually on the ground behind me and let my head lull back like I'm just looking at the sky instead of being strangled.

"Says the crazy asshole who nearly got himself put to death!" He lets go of my headband suddenly, and pulls my arms out from underneath me. Shoving them above my head, I have his breath in mine again.

"So, you want thanks? A show of appreciation for all you've done for poor me?" My control is snapping, and I become acutely aware of every brush against me and every growl I hear from him. Some of it's adrenaline, some of it's my Sharingan, but some of this awareness is coming from somewhere else.

"I want to know who the fuck you are! That's all I want! I've read your heart, felt your pain, and took the brunt of all of that damn hatred you had. And this is the result? Some selfish, empty shell?" Naruto of the past would already be crying onto me, but this one looks like he could eat me alive.

"Selfish? I'm still helping you do these fucking Trials, and you think I'm selfish?" I growl, but I break our glare and face away from him, "Maybe I am. I'm getting a few things out of these Trials. For instance, I'm seeing just how fucked up Konoha still is. And if I find out I'm just a relic from a past that everyone wants to forget," I push up enough to speak directly into his ear, "I'm gone, and so are you."

"It's a deal," He lets go of me and pushes himself up. I debate ignoring the hand that he offers to me, but I use it to pull myself up. Naruto knew what I was saying with the gesture. He tries to leave, but I don't let him go so fast.

"You're wondering who I am, aren't you? Well, I know one thing about myself for certain. I am different from you. Even if I don't have revenge, I still seek power. You don't want to show your strength to those people because you think they'll see you as a monster, but if you do nothing but preach, they will walk all over you," I'm done, I let him go. As we both come down from the high of fighting, Naruto smiles.

"We all have things we have to work on, don't we?" He laughs and stretches the rest of his anger out, "Ah, man. That was pretty intense fighting! I nearly bit you!" What an idiot.

"Bite me?" When I see the teasing glint in his eyes that I remember from when we were kids, I regret giving him an opening. Gripping my hair in one hand and untying my headband with the other, Naruto exposes my neck to him. I grab onto his shoulders, intent on pushing him away. Before I get that chance, he hisses like he's some idiotic Dracula and bites down near where my curse mark was. There was no preparing myself for the uncalled-for addition of his tongue to my skin, or the harsh sucking that went along with his biting. It wasn't until he pulled away that I notice I had screwed my eyes shut.

"Oops. I left a mark," I leave an equal mark on his cheek with a well-aimed punch.

"The hell was that, dobe!" I'm not liking my tone one bit. Not only is it hard to talk, there's no possibility for thinking straight. My blood was flowing out of my head and into my face, Naruto's mark on me, and also...

This is getting to be too much like that night at the casino. I pick the direction of the inn and start running that way, willing my blood to move into my legs and out of places it shouldn't be. I make it back to the inn and into the bathroom only a few minutes sooner than Naruto. I have the shower running without me in it when he pounds on the door.

"Okay, look, I'll try to lay off of the teasing, alright? If you haven't noticed, I'm not the best at having normal conversations. Especially not with you," I can hear his loud sigh through the door that I'm leaning against, "By the way, I'll put your clothes outside the door, seeing as you like to forget them when you go running into the shower," His footsteps trail off, and then I'm able to take a shower in relative peace.

When I get my clothes off, I'm relieved to see that I've calmed down considerably. The cold water helps quiet the hypersensitive nerve endings all over my body. Playing the scene over and over again, I can't understand what made Naruto want to bite me. And not just that...

The adrenaline from fighting will make anyone's body more aware. When Naruto is "teasing," the effect on me is similar to that. It's a familiar rush, but with one crucial difference. If we're fighting, my body knows to prepare itself for battle, but in times when we're not arguing about anything, and he catches me off-guard, my body has no focus. It has no clue what to prepare, or where to have my blood rush off to. Recently, it's taken a liking to going to the very places I never want it to go.

Blushing was bad enough, but I never expected I was going to have to bend in half to cover what Naruto's purring had done to me.

NO!

I'm not bringing up memories of that again no no no no-

DAMMIT!

Naruto's teasing isn't new to me, and I had recognized the warning signs. Even when we were kids, he was always overly affectionate and playful towards everyone, including me. When he did it to Sakura, it was flirting. Whenever I wasn't in the mood to fight with him, he'd "tease" me. I say "tease" because there wasn't and still isn't anything he can tease me about. If anything, it consisted of showing off that he can get into my personal space without being knocked out instantly. Back then, that meant throwing an arm around my neck or grabbing my hand and dragging me. My only reaction was to scoff at him and pull away.

That was a lot easier back when Naruto was just playful. Now that I don't know his intent, I also don't know how to tell my body to react. And plus, he never gives any reasons for what he does to me. He'll just say he's teasing or that he just _felt _like biting me.

I rinse myself off in icy water before drying off and retrieving the clothes he set outside of the door. The pile was topped by the headband that he had pulled off of me earlier so he could...

No.

A change of thought process is necessary, so I look at what I had been wearing. It wasn't my choice, but I used to have on a dark blue, long sleeve Konoha shirt, complete with the red spiral on both arms. The pants were baggy and black, and the sandals were a standard blue pair. Ultimately, I felt like I was wearing pajamas a few sizes too big.

This outfit that Naruto's picked out for me, however, has much more potential, and its color scheme is similar to my older outfits. What I thought for a moment was ANBU armor ends up being an armored, sleeveless turtleneck. It's a lighter shade of white than ANBU armor, and it has a black zipper running down the center. The black pants are a tighter, more fitting pair than the last ones. My sandals are the same as my old pair, so I tuck the bottom of my pants into them. Lastly, he threw in a pair of arm guards that cover as much as my last ones. Pulling it all on and trying the black headband around my throat, I see the result in the mirror. The only thing missing is a sword and a weapon belt, which should also be in the supplies.

I manage to find a black weapon holster for kunai, so I wear it like a belt. When Naruto turns away from the counter and sees me, I catch him giving me a once-over.

"Now, that's a lot better," I let the dobe be pleased with himself while I go searching for a katana. Unfortunately, they only gave us kunai and shuriken. Damn it.

"Hey, uh, would you come here for a sec?" Naruto's being sheepish, so it's not hard to assume that he's going to try to apologize for earlier. I humor him and stand in front of him, waiting for him to beg for forgiveness.

Well, he does say sorry, but only when he's untying my headband again and unzipping my shirt. With my neck exposed again and my fist at the ready, Naruto only has a second before the walls get splatter painted.

"I just figured you wouldn't want the mark to be that bad," He said while placing a cold spoon against my neck. My fist relaxes as I roll my eyes at his logic.

"I'm wearing a turtleneck and a headband there, so I doubt it's ever visible," I point out, so Naruto just shrugs and continues pressing the spoon on my skin.

"Why?" Hopefully he knows that I'm asking him why there's a mark in the first place, because I'm not going to ever say it outloud.

"Ah, well," he takes the spoon off and sets it on the table, "You know, I didn't plan on doing anything but bite you. But you, um," Spit it out, idiot!

Wait, me?

"You made a sound when I bit you. I thought it was kind of funny," I growled at him, and he sputters, "I was teasing you, that's all! But when you made that sound, I just kept trying different things," He rushes through his explanation, "I was just getting you to make sounds."

I made _sounds?_ Like what!

"No, no, don't freak out!" His hands fly out in defense. Nervously, he zips my shirt up and ties my headback back on me while I glare at him.

"Really, they weren't weird sounds, I promise! They were just, well, just a little bit," he rambles on until he finds the word, "Encouraging! That's it."

"You think I was _encouraging _you?" Naruto groans when he hears my hiss.

"I don't know what else to say, Sasuke. I'm sorry. What I did was weird and I swear I was just teasing," He runs a hand through his hair, "But how I went from yelling at you to biting you, that just doesn't even make sense to me."

"Nothing about you makes sense to me, dobe."

We don't talk for about half an hour, and that's just to discuss the next trial. The Ox Trial is given to us by the innkeeper woman.

The Ox Trial is given to us by the innkeeper woman. She isn't the one to tell us what it is, she just simply gives us a scroll that came addressed to us. It's a map to Lady Chance's home village and a vague description of our objective.

"A revolution?" Naruto furrows his brow in concentration, finally taking something seriously.

"These things happen after wars. " Well, mine did.

I study the map and find that it's only twenty kilometers North from here. Aware that we're heading into a war zone, he and I pack shuriken and kunai into pouches. Under the cover of night, we travel through the trees and stop outside of sight. Though it's nearly midnight, there's a torch-wielding mob in the small square of the village. A grizzled man climbs the statue of a tree that stands in the center of the square.

"The Momiji clan has been oppressed for too long! We've pleaded with them to share the goods that come into this village, but they refuse to give us anything but their table scraps! The other clans couldn't hold out, but we will, and we will win!"

Naruto, who apparently can't ever see someone making a speech and not interfere with his own, flies from our hiding spot and lands on the roof of one of the shacks.

"How is attacking them going to make them want to help you out any more?" When Naruto speaks, the whole mob readies themselves for an attack.

"A ninja! Those fucking rich Kashiwa bastards hired you, didn't they! Do they really think that one ninja can take down my whole clan?" He yells, but the rest of his people fall silent when I go to stand beside Naruto. Seeing my infamous eyes and Naruto's unique appearance, they realize who they're dealing with.

"Oh, so they didn't hire just normal ninja, huh? They're afraid enough that they've paid the big bucks for war heroes!" With my eyes rolling, I set him straight.

"We're not hired. We were only told that there was a revolution here. Naruto and I are looking for something called the Golden Acorn. Where is it?" I demand, but Naruto can't get past seeing them as the underdogs.

"If you help us, we'll talk to this Kashiwa clan for you and get this straightened out."

"There is no use for talking anymore! We're done talking to them and pleading with them!" The crowd roars in agreement, but I'm already heading towards the compound that looks like it belongs to the Kashiwas.

"Sasuke, what are you doing?" He grabs me before I can get too far.

"I'm going to ask the Kashiwas about this acorn. They're too busy playing war to help us," Though as I say this, the man on the statue addresses me.

"Uchiha Sasuke, huh? That's you, right?" I glance back at him when he says my name, "Well, if you're looking for the Golden Acorn, we don't have it. It's just another Momiji relic that those fucking Kashiwas stole from us. They claimed that it was theirs though it's been in our clan for centuries!"

"Then I know where we're going," I pull away from Naruto and continue into the compound. Silently, I navigate through the polished halls until I find a room that's occupied. I slip in, unseen and unheard, and see the occupant of the room. It's an old man sipping tea. He's wearing an ornate kimono, so I assume he's one of the heads of the family. Without further delay, I press a hand against his mouth and a kunai to his throat.

"Must be nice to relax in here while there's a revolution outside," I whisper into his ear without letting him see my face, "I'd rather not have to use my eyes, so why don't you just tell me where the Golden Acorn is being held and you can go back to having your house burned around you," so I can hear his response, I slide my hand down, but I remind him of the kunai against his throat. Once his mouth is free, he sucks in a big breath.

"Now now, don't scream or you'll ruin your kimono."

"Sasuke, what are you doing to this old guy?" Naruto wanders in without trying to be a ninja and decides to chastise me for actually doing something productive?

"You're a complete idiot, you know that? He's obviously one of the clan leaders, so it would make sense for him to know where that acorn is," I growl, turning back to face Naruto. Taking the opportunity, the old man pushes away the kunai and tries to run. I use the kunai to pin his kimono to the floor, and he trips when he's pulled back.

"Damn it, Sasuke, can't you see he's old! You're not supposed to trip old people!" Naruto slaps the back of my head and goes to help the other guy up.

"I'm sorry, gramps. Sasuke's not in the greatest mood for some reason. I'm Uzumaki Naruto, by the way. Do you mind telling me about what's going on outside?" To hell with manners.

"The Momiji clan, they've been complaining about rations for a month now. We truly give them everything that we don't need! None of us understand why they can't just be happy with that. We're just a farming village! They just assume that since my granddaughter is making millions at casinos that we must have so much more," The old man is shaking like a small dog, so Naruto pats his hands gently.

"Lady Chance is your granddaughter? Sasuke and I just met her," Naruto meant to be comforting, but hearing the woman's name frightens him.

"Is she still alive? Did that man kill her?"

"Sasuke? No, he didn't even touch her, promise!" Naruto smiles, but the old man shakes his head.

"Not him. That man, that horrible man!"

"Big Dealer? No, she's his mistress," nothing Naruto says calms the old man down.

"No, no, I don't even know who that is! Oh god, what if that man comes here!"

I'm getting tired of this man's rambling. Instead, I look at the decorations around the room. One piece in particular catches my interest, so I take it down from its mount. A katana, and one that's been cared for. Its holster is sleek and black, and its hilt has a crossing black ribbons that end with a carving of a hawk with ruby eyes. Trying the blade out on the paper door, I see that it's perfectly sharpened.

After resheathing the katana and putting it on using the holster's strap, I turn back to Naruto to see if he's made any progress. Obviously not, since the old guy has fallen asleep.

"What, did you sing him a lullaby?" I scoff and return the slap to the head that Naruto had given me earlier, "Did you at least get the location of our objective?"

"No, and shut up! This revolution's more important than getting that acorn," He stands up and crosses his arms. His excuse for a glare doesn't faze me.

"This fight is their business. Ours is getting that acorn!"

"If we can just get the Momijis and Kashiwas to talk, we can stop them and then get the acorn in peace!" Naruto argues back.

"There you go again, preaching of peace! Can't you see that nothing you say will help? The Momijis are stubborn, and the Kashiwas are too ignorant in their comfort to notice anything outside of these walls! They've already tried talking. Even if you have them explain their sides, the peasants won't believe that they aren't being oppressed, and the rich will never understand how hard it is to live on the outside!" I haven't gotten closer to him, so I know we aren't really fighting. But if he says one more ignorant thing, I'll take some time out of doing this Trial to kick his ass.

"They haven't tried with anyone unbiased around before! Maybe that's all they need! And we need to do it quick or else that mob is going to burn this place down!" He's still trying to convince me, but that's even more fruitless than trying to convince these clans to understand each other.

"Preaching won't do anything! They've already decided on what they're doing. And so have the Kashiwas. Instead of screaming from the sidelines, these people need a real distraction right in the middle of their stupid game,"

"So, what are you suggesting?" Naruto asks, and I remind him clearly of what I said this morning.

"I'm suggesting that you start seeing things my way more. Your words are nothing if you don't have the power to back them up. You give me two minutes and I'll have this argument over."

With that, I head out of the compound and go back to the time square. The Momiji clan is still gathered there, so I jump onto the top of the tree statue to get their attention.

"I've lost my patience with you idiots!" Powering up a Chidori, I press my hand against the metal statue. The leader goes flying from the statue, unscathed but smoking. Now that I've gotten their attention, I need to get the Kashiwas out here.

Activating my Sharingan, I leap straight up into the air. I hear a few screams from the crowd.

"_Amaterasu_!_" _As the blood pours from my eye, a circle of black flames surrounds the small village. The screams from the Kashiwa compound are instant, and they're quickly running to the square, trying to get as far away from the fire as possible. They stop in a scared huddle when they see the mob.

"Kashiwas! You've abused us for too long!" One of the Momiji men yell out, and the mob cries and starts running towards the other clan, but they stop before they reach the new line of fire I placed with another jutsu.

"That's enough!" My voice overpowers all of theirs. Every pair of eyes stare up at me.

Bad idea.

The Tsukiyomi I use on the two clans are different from the usual torturous nightmares. For the Kashiwas, I let them see for seventy-two hours what it's like to starve and work in fields and watch their children die from malnutrition and curable diseases. The Momijis experience was harder to make, because I couldn't scare them by making them live the sheltered life of the Kashiwas. Instead, they're also starving and suffering because I have the Kashiwas not exist to buy the necessities for the village, the ones that they called "table scraps."

The few seconds it takes for the genjutsu is enough time for Naruto to reach me. He goes to punch me, but I dodge him and bring him near. His eyes are shut, which is a smarter move than expected for a dobe.

"I wasn't going to use it on you, idiot. Just watch them," I point to the awakening crowd. I put out the fire between them so they can see each other clearly.

"Brothers!" The old man from earlier, who apparently was woken up and dragged here, speaks out, "We promise, we never knew what you suffered!"

"Brothers?" Naruto asks, "You're all related?"

"We are cousin clans, yes. Generations ago, only the Kashiwas produced a male heir, so they got all the wealth and the Momiji clan became their workers," the Momiji leader speaks up, but without the rage from before.

"We can't fix our past transgressions. We can only offer our full support and help with the work that keeps this village alive," the Kashiwa elder approaches the Momiji leader and offers his hand.

"We've seen what would become of us if you were really oppressing us and giving us nothing. My clan felt under-appreciated, but your support is what we didn't appreciate for what it was. If we work together, we could turn this village into something, especially if the other clans come back!" They shake hands and Naruto's obviously pleased, but I'm not done. I pull the flames back from around the village, and whisper for Naruto to do his part. Using his abilites with wind chakra, he clears the smoke from the area so that the stars and moon brighten the village.

"Now, that's all great, but we need that Golden Acorn," I remind them, jumping down to face the two men. Nodding at me, the Kashiwa man calls over an old woman, his wife presumably, who pulls off her necklace and presents it to me. The Golden Acorn is the pendant of the necklace. Even in the dark it has an unearthly glow. Taking it into my hand, I feel the strange power locked inside it.

"Thank you, Uchiha Sasuke," the Momiji leader backs away from me and kneels on the ground. The Momiji's follow suit, and so do the Kashiwas. I know what they're doing, but I don't believe it. When they bow to me, I take a step back and feel Naruto against my back. He puts his hands on my shoulders and whispers into my ear.

"That's one way of having people see the other side of things. A bit brutal, but it got them talking. You did good, Sasuke," his words are dripping with pride. He's proud of me? No, I was trying to make a point!

"Idiot. It's 'You did well' not 'You did good,'" I must be grasping at straws if I'm correcting his grammar.

"Yeah, but I mean what I said. What you did here is a good thing, so you did good. A good deed, or something like that."

"You're really starting to annoy me with your talking."

During our reporting this morning, Naruto can't stop talking about me. The elders are surprised to hear my so-called "good deed." Naruto rants for a good hour about how "cool" I looked and he kept bringing up how they bowed to me. They were impressed the first time they heard it, but not the twenty-third time.

"At least he's showing potential. Now, as we've said, we need to see the Golden Acorn," Koharu demands from us, and I take the opportunity to shut the dobe up by giving them the pendant.

"Ah, there it is. Mitokado, prepare the Destruction Scroll," she says it so flippantly! Once again, just like the mask, we go through so much work just to have our objective destroyed! They place the Golden Acorn in the center of an open scroll, then make the Tiger hand seal. The acorn melts, turns black, then turns into smoke.

"What the hell did you do that for?" Naruto screams, beating a fist down on the table.

"You've completed the Ox Trial. What happens to the items you bring us shouldn't concern you," Mitokado assures Naruto, but that only works to piss him off more. To avoid needing their new table replaced, they try to change the subject.

"That's an interesting sword you have, Sasuke," the female elder makes it clear she wants to know who decided to arm the Uchiha with his best weapon.

"It was a gift of sorts from that village," I shrugged, not seeing any point to telling them I stole it.

"Looks good! Is that a hawk?" Naruto's too easily distracted.

"Yeah. Look, I'm ready to go," I sigh and stand up, nodding to the elders to excuse myself. Naruto quickly follows.

"Hey, before we go back to the inn, I want to show you something I found when I wandered around the town there!"

After the short run, he has us searching the streets for whatever he wants to show me. Once he finds it, he pulls me in and shows me a back corner of the store.

"I thought it was really weird to find it here, but it turns out that the owner of the store is named Uchiwa!"

The corner is full of the Uchiha symbol in various different color combinations and sizes. There are patches, posters, scrolls, and actual fans. Naruto digs through the assorted patches and finds one as big as his hand on the bottom.

"You're always putting it on your clothes, so I thought you'd want one," he shows the patch to me, and it's the same colors as my clan symbol.

"I thought you wanted me to get over that," I ask, but I take the patch from him and stare at it to see if there are any loose threads.

"No, I want you to remember that the past is the past. That doesn't mean that you aren't still Uchiha Sasuke. This is your symbol now, not the clan's. So, you should be able to wear it proudly."

"Dobe," I pause to sigh before looking up at his overly-earnest smile, "Thanks."

"Anytime, teme."


	5. Tiger Trial: Possession

_Tiger Trial: Possession_

Oh man, I'm smiling so damn much it's starting to hurt. Since I'm standing behind Sasuke, I can clearly see the Uchiha symbol that's sewn on his back. The patch that _I bought _for him, despite my poor Gama-chan wallet being so empty and sad-looking. The very patch that he practically ran home to sew on to the shirt that _I chose _for him. Hell, while I'm at it, I can even admire his spiky hair that _I cut. _I'm doing a damn good job with putting Sasuke together!

If I need anymore proof that he's doing better, I just remind myself of the sheer awesomeness that was Sasuke stopping the revolution. Peacefully! And that's just the beginning of the changes I've seen in Sasuke. Everyday, I see him develop little quirks and habits. Like when he eats, he'll pay attention to the order that the food was made and eat it in the same order. Probably something to do with freshness or some other kind of picky bullshit, but hey, if that's his personality, that's fine by me. Another quirk is that he has to be outside for at least three hours or he gets cranky and can't sleep. If I know that he hasn't been outside much that day, I'll send him out to pick up things from the store or push him out to go train.

"Are you still staring at my symbol or can I get up?" Yeah, he's still a sarcastic dick, I know that'll never change.

"Oh, go ahead. I was just looking 'cause I think it's just a little lop-sided," Teasing mode, start up!

"No, it's not," Sasuke's at the door to the bathroom when I break down and start laughing at him. Oh fuck, he's so easy!

"Yeah, yeah, you're right, I gotta tell ya," I choke out, "No, really! You'd be staring at it in the mirror for hours, and I gotta piss sometime!"

"Tch," Oh, come on now, Sasuke, use your big boy words! That sends me into another fit of laughter. Sasuke crosses his arms and raises an eyebrow at me, his standard "You're teasing me, and I know it, but I'm not going to acknowledge it, though by doing this I am acknowledging it" pose.

"Damn, Sasuke, please don't be a perfectionist. You'll drive me nuts as my Assistant!" Okay, deep breaths, calm down or he'll rip me a new one! But... I just can't stop!

"I'm not a perfectionist," he says it flatly, but his pouting is giving him away.

"Oh really? Tell that to me when you're making me redo all of my reports because of my sloppy handwriting!"

"Being a perfectionist takes effort. You're not a perfectionist if you're automatically perfect." I back the hell up because that's some serious Sasuke-logic there. I fall on my ass and burst into another fit of manly giggles. This guy! How is he so funny without even trying?!

"Sasuke!"Oh man, I can't breathe!

My laughter stops dead when I hear something from Sasuke.

"What was that?" I'm grinning still, but my eyes are narrowed at him. When he sees my look, the hand that's covering his mouth whips down.

"What?" He resumes his cross-armed defensive position.

"No, come on, what was it?" I mimic him and cross my arms, and then I get close enough that our arms nearly touch. I'm giving him my patented Uzumaki Stare Down, which has a success rate of 115%!

"It was just...hn. That's all," He doesn't let himself break eye contact, but he doesn't know that's one of his usual signs of bluffing.

"Nah, I swear it was more than just one. I distinctly heard two sounds. You might have been all 'hn!' but there was another sound! Like a 'heh' or something! That's a laugh!" Once I say it, Sasuke shakes his head stubbornly, but just once.

"C'mon, you were funny! What you said was funny, so you laughed, admit it!" I push my arms against his once before putting my hands on my hips. It's what he usually does when I say something stupid.

"What's it like to be a ninja with hearing problems?" He's pouting, so I know I only have a few more minutes of good teasing time left before he punches me or runs away.

"Sorry, didn't hear that. I'm too busy wondering if I could get to you laugh again! Are you _ticklish_?" I jump him, pushing him to the floor and sitting on him to pin him. He obviously has no clue what the hell I'm doing, since his face is a hilarious mask of shock. With the precious seconds I have left, I shove my hands up his shirt and start tickling his sides and his stomach in random patterns.

"Stop! Na- no!- Naruto! Off!" He starts clutching at my hands, but I'm moving them around too fast for him to be able to get a grip on me through his shirt. I pull my hands out and grab his ankle. I'm not stupid enough to try to tickle the feet of a ninja who's into kicking, so I just pull his ankle up and out a bit. I use my other hand to tickle the underside if his knee.

Jackpot! He's not laughing, but his face is bright red and his protests turned into yelps and screams. I do it to his other leg and tears are forced from his eyes.

_Temporary Sasuke POV_

_ Damn it!_

_ Shut up, body!_

_SHUT UP!_

_ FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK-!_

_Now back to our beloved Naruto POV_

"No!" He cracks his head against the floor. I assume it was so he could collect himself and do something to get me to stop, seeing as the next things I feel are his knees against my sides. He whips me on my back and quickly gets out from under me. He curls himself into a tight ball once he's free.

Well, it was fun while it lasted!

I stand up and stretch before ruffling his hair as a last tease. He growls wordlessly, which just makes me chuckle a bit.

He refuses to speak to me again until we get our next Trial, but it's not really something I want to hear. All I did was put my hand on his shoulder so I could read over it, and suddenly he's on the other side of the room glaring at me.

"What the hell is wrong with you!? Why are you always touching me?!" My hands fly up in defense. I don't really know, so it takes me a while to think of an answer.

"Just teasing, I'm just teasing you!" I spit out.

"Teasing? Teasing has nothing to do with touching! Keep your fucking hands to yourself for once in your life, you dumbass!" He throws the Trial scroll at me, "You weren't even half this bad when we were kids!"

"I don't get why it bothers you so much now!" It's rare to see Sasuke so hysterical. I really must be pushing him to his limits if he's this vocal.

"Of course it bothers me, you idiot! When you aren't pinning me, you're stripping me or you have your mouth all over me! You breathe against my neck constantly! Who wouldn't be bothered by that?" When it's put that way it's a little strange, but what's so wrong about it?

"Oh, right," I flounder for a second, but I finally come up with some stupid excuse, "Uh, I learned it from Sai."

"So you 'tease' him like this, too?" Good news, he's not screaming anymore. Bad news, his hiss is scarier. At least he's taking my lie seriously.

"Yeah, totally! All the time! Whenever we're together!" Good, just nod a couple times and he'll relax. He's not familiar enough with Sai to know that he'd rather tease me with questions about my dick than do what I do. I just go along with it, what else can I do?

"Hn," That's the last thing he says to me until we get to the location of the Tiger Trial. I never got the chance to read the Trial, so when I find myself in some creepy ass, foggy forest, I decide it's about time to ask.

"So, um, what's our objective, Sasuke?" We're leaping through the trees, but we're not high enough to be out of the thick fog. I make sure I can see him at all times.

"We have to search the murdered scientist's abandoned mansion and find a vial of green liquid that's emitting purple smoke," Oh, you've gotta be kidding me! There's no way in hell I'm going to a place like that! I come to a full stop in seconds. Sasuke gets just a bit further before noticing that I stayed back.

"You're not afraid are you, bibiri-kun*?" I twitch at the familiar taunt, but now is not the time for skipping merrily down memory lane! The Trial is asking me to go straight to a doomed and tortured existence for all eternity! Have these people never watched any horror movies?!

"How are you totally fine with going there? That place is guaranteed to be haunted in the worst kind of way! There's going to be demons and ghosts and monsters and murderers all over the goddamn place! Now who's the idiot here?" I fling my arms out, because if Sasuke hasn't already noticed the nearly perfect horror movie conditions, he sure as hell needs to.

"Still you," he shakes his head and turns to continue running, but I grab on to him and make him stay on the branch. Oops, kind of forgot the whole "no touchy-touchy" thing! The stare of death I get from Sasuke isn't as scary as being torn apart by the ghost of a mad scientist, so I'm not fazed.

"Are you so freaked out that you've lost your mind, dobe?" Teme's hissing again, so I know to give him a little room.

"Insult me all you want, asshole. When you're getting eaten by the demon spirit of this crazy, evil scientist, don't try asking me for help!"

Okay, mental images here are very unnecessary, brain. Can we forget the chains, at least?

No? Fuckin' A.

"I have nothing to worry about. Don't ghosts go for the blonds first?" I let out a stream of curses while glaring at Sasuke, hoping that he can translate that into my refusal to move from this spot. Once he does, he lowers his head and sighs in that "You're such an idiot" way. Placing his hands on my shoulders, Sasuke locks eyes with me.

"If you're going to be Hokage, the problems you're going to have to deal with everyday will be much more frightening than ghosts. Not to mention, these problems will be real," I'm pretty pathetic right now if someone who barely speaks is giving me a pep talk. Well, it's a pretty effective talk, actually. Geez, I must be rubbing off on him more than I thought!

Speaking of rubbing, I start grinning at Sasuke. One questioning eyebrow flies up, so I'm pretty sure he thinks I'm smiling about his little speech. I'm going to have fun clearing that up! Guess what, Sasuke~!

"You're touching me!" Ha! his face! Going for gold, I place my hands on his waist. The fist smashing into my face is probably well-deserved.

"I hope you like my version of touching," he growls before flying off. I debate chasing him, but he brought up becoming Hokage. This is something I have to do to finish these Trials, so I follow him. Thankfully, he doesn't just barge into the mansion when we find it, so I'm able to delay the horror.

"If I die here, I will haunt you forever. And if you die, I'll make the afterlife hell for you," My threat is a bit weak since my voice breaks in the middle of it. All I get from him is a short scoff. I know damn well from my horror movie watching to not be the one standing in the back, so I run ahead of Sasuke when he walks through the spiked gate. He's acting like we're strolling through a sunny park when we're in the middle of the overgrown courtyard from Hell. We walk around a pants-shittingly creepy fountain that has crying cherubs being attacked by some thorny ivy, both in the statue and by the actual plant. When we finally make it to the mansion's gigantic entrance, I cringe at the horrible lion door-knockers.

"How about some ding-dong-ditch, Sasuke? You first!" I joke bitterly. Now that I'm resigning to my fate, I might as well make my death funny.

"Before we go in, we should plan a course of action for our search. We can do a quick sweep of the first level for any signs of a laboratory. If we find nothing there, we should check the basement. From my personal experience with mad scientists, it's the most likely place to find a lab," While he's busy plotting out what we do, I'm staring at him in disbelief.

"The basement?" I slap my hand over my eyes and drag it away slowly, "Remember what I said about you getting eaten by a demon? Well, I was wrong. Why should you worry if you're just gonna serve yourself up in chains?!"

"Chains weren't mentioned, dobe," With that, Sasuke pushes against the door and disappears into the house. No fucking way I'm being left alone, so I run straight in and slam against him. He didn't move much past the entrance because of the vase pieces scattered in the hallway. Dust covers everything, the wallpaper is peeling, and there are tons of cobwebs; I mean, why the hell does this have to look like the perfect setting, huh!?

"I'm assuming we're not splitting up to search?"

"And I'm assuming that we're not planning on being totally batshit insane!" I meant to scream, but it only comes out as a harsh whisper.

"Hn," He steps around the shards, and I run ahead of him again. Let him be the one who gets ripped away from behind! Wait, then the ghost would just come to get me next! Damn it, I hope they like pretty, pale bastards that already look like ghosts. That'll buy me some time to get the hell out of here!

Uh, nevermind about that one part.

With no warning, there's a horrible cracking sound behind me, then a huge crash. Fuck! Sasuke screamed! Oh shit, shit, shit! I turn around as fast as possible. Sasuke's not there, but there's a huge hole in the floor from where the demon must've grabbed him! The demon has Sasuke! Fuckin' A!

You know that thought that comes to you a split second after you do something really stupid? I got one of those when I was about halfway through jumping in the hole.

At least it's not a long fall, and I land on something soft. Once the dust around me clears, I see that the 'something soft' was Sasuke.

"Oh, hey! There's no demon!" I smile brightly at him when he opens his eyes. But, something's off. His eye color, maybe? They're a weird kind of pink or something, but it's a bit hard to tell in this lighting. It's almost like the whites of his eyes bled some of their color into his red irises.

"Ngh," Sasuke makes this weird groan, which I take as a cue to get off him. I must've been wrong...

Uh, Sasuke? Are you crying? Why into my neck?

"Ah? Are you hurt, or just-? I mean, what's wrong? Sasuke?" The more I say, the tighter his arms hold me. He's not really sobbing, but it's too pathetic-sounding to be normal. What if he has something stuck into his back? What if he's dying!?

I pull him up to me quickly so I can see if his back is being stabbed. No, it's a bit dusty and a few stitches from his patch have come loose, but nothing's pierced. Clutching for me again, Sasuke scrambles to sit on my lap. As hard as I try, he won't pry his face away from my neck, so I have to hold him away from me by his shoulders.

"Sasuke, what's gotten into you?" A deep blush colors his cheeks and his weird eyes flit away from me.

"I'm just so happy," What the hell? Sasuke never talks so with so much...breath? Did I really knock so much wind out of him that he can't even talk right? Or, what if he hit his head? I start checking him for any bleeding in the back of his skull. Apparently, he sees this as what I called "encouragement" before.

It's as hard to get Sasuke's lips off of mine as it was to get him away from my neck. As a last resort, I could punch him to get him away, but I'm too shocked to move that much. His kisses are desperate and, well, passionate. Playful, too; he just bit my lip! If I'm completely honest, he's not a bad kisser at all, but whatever! I mean, this doesn't make any damn sense! Whatever happened to the whole "no touchy!" thing!?

What the hell is that? It's kind of like...

_His tongue?_

So, did you ever have those split second "Wow I'm dumb!" thoughts within minutes of each other? Yeah, it was about when I felt Sasuke's tongue against mine that I had another. Opening my mouth in shock was not my best idea. Now I can't even punch him away or he'll bite his tongue!

Well, he has to breathe sometime, right? Hm...that's it! If I can prevent him from breathing too much, he'll pull away! Now, how to do that? His tongue is way too distracting, it just keeps flicking and rubbing and...oh, right, duh! Fighting against his busy mouth, I get my tongue far into his mouth. He goes completely nuts with it for a short time, but he pulls away as planned.

We're both gasping for breath, and our lips are red and shining. Getting a grip on myself, I fly up and try to find something to put between us. Luckily, there's a table covered in beakers right behind me! I jump behind it when Sasuke picks himself up from the floor. This weird ass guy dusts himself off while giggling. Something's really fucked up if the Uchiha is giggling!

Maybe I am in Hell! But, where are all the demons and fire and monsters?

"Darling, you're always playing with those silly beakers. Why would you do that if you could be playing with me?" Sasuke flounces towards the table and sweeps an arm over it, sending all the beakers crashing to the ground. My eyes hurt from the dust flying into them, but I can't help but hold them wide open to watch Sasuke. He crawls on to the table, one leg, then the other. His eyes give me a slow look from my hair down to...what!? What the hell has gotten into you, Sasuke!? While staring at my crotch, he licks his lips and comes closer to me slowly.

"You can experiment on me all night, sweetheart," Sasuke's eyes flick up, and I'm frozen in place by his expression. He's biting his lip while smirking, his cheeks are lightly flushed, and there's a playful glint in his eyes – I just can't take it! While I'm distracted, one of his hands flies to my zipper and pulls it down.

"Just relax, doll, and my mouth will do the rest," He's not really going to – oh hell! I'm out of that room before Sasuke's other hand can make it into my pants. I zip up as I race through the rooms, ignoring whatever's in any of them. Frankly, I don't give a damn.

Sasuke just...he just...me, wanted to, just now! I'm in the spookiest house ever and the scariest thing in it is a horny Sasuke!

Shutting five doors behind me should be enough for now, so I stop to see where I am. I try to look, but this room has an eerie purple haze that's coming from who knows where. There are beakers around this room too, and some other weird tubes and burners and scientific doo-hickies that I don't know the names of. Well, though it took falling through the floor, we found the bastard's lab. He must have had way too many experiments going on at once to need so many different work rooms. Did this guy ever leave his basement?

"Where are you?" He's starting to sound annoyed, "Oh, damn it! You have too many rooms down here!" Sasuke's voice is coming from a few rooms behind me, but he doesn't seem to be moving fast. Quick, I need to barricade the door!

"You're not just a scientist! You're a human being, too! And humans need love and socialization to survive. You're smart enough to know that! You're going to waste away in these labs if you don't come out to play!" Nothing that Sasuke says makes sense to me! He keeps calling me a scientist and using weird science-related pick up lines!

So, three strikes! It's official, I'm a dumb ass! It took me this long to remember what I was even doing here in the first place and who died in here! The scientist guy, that's who Sasuke is talking about. But, why like this?

I had found a heavy table to use as a barricade, but Sasuke's kicks are too strong. The door flies off its hinges and lands down on the table.

"Why are you running away from life? From love?" he shoves the door towards me, and it would've hit my stomach if I didn't jump away in time, "Why are you running away from what I don't have anymore?!"

"Anymore?" I'm still not fully understanding, but I don't feel like he's talking to me.

"I died from loneliness, because you loved your experiments more than me! You forgot about me, you bastard!" He's crying again, but this time it's heart-wrenching sobs, "I loved you! Why did you let me die all alone? Was I just a mistress to you?"

Mistress, my mistress? No, not mine...

Could it be possible that Sasuke's being...?

Well, that explains everything!

"Who are you and why are you using Sasuke?" I yell at this "mistress" that's somehow controlling Sasuke.

"I was yours, that's who I was!" he crawls over the table and drops to the floor. He's crying at my feet and clutching at my legs. It pulls at something deep in my chest. All I want to do is hold him and let him know I'm here. However, this isn't Sasuke; I have to remind myself of that every time I see his pained expression. I steel myself so I can speak to the one inside him.

"No, you weren't. I'm Uzumaki Naruto. I'm a ninja, not a scientist. The scientist who lived here was murdered," It took a few gasps and head shakes, but the girl possessing Sasuke seemed to finally see who I was.

"My...my Kemi was m-murdered?" Sasuke's body goes limp, but then he starts shaking.

"I'm sorry, it happened years ago! So, please move on and let Sasuke have control of himself again. Your Kemi, he must be waiting for you," I run my fingers through Sasuke's hair to comfort the spirit inside of him.

"No, that's impossible. He didn't want me around when we were alive, so why would he want me in the afterlife?" Sasuke's voice is weak and strangled with tears.

"This guy," I start, carefully picking my words. This is too important to mess up, "He must've been really dedicated to his work. It was his dream, right?"

I'm going somewhere with this, so I kneel down and hold Sasuke's shoulders again.

"People go after their dreams and sometimes, without trying, they can end up hurting those closest to them. Time that could be spent with the ones they love is used on chasing that dream. For people like that, it can take a lifetime before they see what they've done," I'm not really liking how much this can apply to me, or even Sasuke in the past, but I let the words flow from me.

"Do you think that, maybe, he knows now?" Sasuke sniffs and wipes his eyes. Pink eyes shift to me again, and for once, they look hopeful. It's all or nothing now!

"I'm sure he knows. He's probably regretting how he treated you. I promise, he'll never think of neglecting you again. Actually, I doubt there's any labs there, so you'll have his full attention!" I smile as brightly as I can. A little smile pulls on the corners of his mouth, too. He even chuckles a bit before talking.

"Oh, that silly man is probably bored out of his mind!" He sighs and wipes his face with a hand, "He might have been a genius, but he was a real idiot."

"I'm sure he'll love to hear that," I joke and ruffle his hair again. It's another successful speech!

"Yeah, but at least he was my idiot," he laughs one last time before his pink eyes darken to red. They close as he collapses in my arms. An orb of light forms in front of his chest before flying up into the air. Knowing that it's her, I wave goodbye.

After a few moments of worrying, Sasuke stirs and his eyes flutter open.

"Naruto?" His voice is back to normal, albeit confused. Whatever, it doesn't matter, Sasuke's back!

"Yeah, I'm still here. No monsters have gotten to me yet," Laughing, I sweep the hair out of his face. The glare I get in return tells me that this is definitely Sasuke.

"Oi," the glare vanishes and is replaced with a raised eyebrow, "Whatever happened to leaving me to the ghosts?"

"Well, I need you to complete this Trial and become Hokage, like you said. So, that's why I saved you," I smile down at him, but in doing that I notice that I'm still holding him.

Well, I...he can stay, I guess. I mean, why should I shove him off if we're perfectly comfortable like this...somehow?

"There was nothing to save me from, you idiot. It's probably your fault that the floor caved in, anyway. You were stomping all over the place in front of me,"

"Don't try giving me any shit, Sasuke! I was right about this place being haunted and you didn't believe me! You thought you were so smart for not believing in ghosts, but everyone knows that it's the skeptics that get possessed!"

"Dobe, what happened to me?" he's demanding to know, but I know hell would break loose if he knew.

"Trust me, you don't wanna know what you did while you were possessed. It took me a little bit to figure out, but it was pretty obvious that you weren't in control. The scientist's mistress was using you to talk to me," Yeah, talk. Sure...

"I was possessed by a ghost? That's ridiculous and impossible," he scoffed. Seeing that he's in my arms, he pulls away and sits up straight. Without his heat, I have to cross my arms against the cold basement air.

"Alright, be that way. If you want to take responsibility for shoving your tongue down my throat, be my guest!" It's not the smartest thing I've said, but he's annoying me! Why does he have to be so close-minded, huh?

"I did what?" He's way past the hissing stage and well into his "I'll tear your throat out with my teeth," growling stage.

"Oh, you want me to go into details of how you jumped me? It's just my bad luck that you'd end up getting possessed by some horny ghost!" It's a good thing he hasn't recovered entirely or else he'd be jumping me again. This time, it would be to kick the everliving shit out of me.

"You're fucking with me!"

"Sorry, I didn't take up your offer earlier!" Obviously, I would've been able to prevent myself from screwing the possessed Sasuke no matter how much he begged for me to "play" with him.

Oi, stupid brain! What did I say about those mental images, huh!? Don't bring those memories up right now! Fuckin' A, this is serious!

He stays quiet and still for five minutes straight. Bored of him I start searching around the room for any sign of our objective. Which was what, by the way? Too much weird stuff happened, I totally forgot what it was!

"Yo, Sasuke? What are we supposed to be finding?" I ask quietly, hoping that he's gotten over it by now. He's still giving me the silent treatment, so I ask louder.

"A vial. Green liquid, purple smoke," he grumbles. Nope, he's not over it yet. I kind of figured he'd be like that. If anybody can hold a grudge, it's Sasuke. Thing is, I didn't do anything to him!

"Yeah? Well, good luck finding it in here. This stupid haze is too thick, I can't see anything!"

"It's purple," Maybe falling through the floor did mess him up, because he can't seem to talk normally.

"Thank you, Captain Obvious, but can you do something more useful? Like, get up and help me?"

"You idiot! The haze is purple. The vial we're looking for is emitting purple smoke," He stands up and starts searching the room, "I'm saying it's in here somewhere. Look for where the smoke is thickest and don't stir it around too much!"

After ten minutes of searching, Sasuke finds the vial on a shelf that's built into the corner of the room.

"Alright, so what do we do with this one?" Sasuke doesn't know either, so he hands me the vial. He pulls Trial scroll out of one of his pouches and unfurls it. The purple smoke prevents me from reading it myself, so I just watch Sasuke's eyes scan it.

"It says you're supposed to drink it, Naruto," Sasuke rolls the scroll up while I complain loudly about how there's no way in hell I'd drink that.

"No fucking way, never, nuh uh, not going to happen, that is the dumbest thing I've ever heard! They're trying to kill me!" I nearly pour it on the floor, but Sasuke's hand stops me.

"Drink it, Naruto," I'm about to protest, but he speaks over me, "We'll go to Ichiraku after reporting! We'll take the risk of being in Konoha for too long if you just do what the scroll says."

It's either death or ramen, but my chances seem good enough to me! I down it all in one gulp.

Huh, I feel fine!

Of course, that's only until the gut-wrenching pain starts and makes me drop to my knees. When I scream, I hear Kyuubi's roar in it, too. Whatever that shit was, it's hurting both of us. It feels like salt being poured into a huge wound in my stomach! I scream until I can't breathe, and I feel myself slipping.

"Naruto, don't you dare!" Sasuke? Don't I dare do what? Die? Right, I can't die here, are you kidding me? Focus, c'mon, wake up! Wake up!

"Wake up already!" Sasuke shakes me until I open my eyes. All I can do is weakly laugh and breathe slowly for a while. Once I can move, I shakily stand up by using Sasuke for support.

"We better-," I gasp for breath, "We've gotta get out of here so I can beat the shit out of those elders!"

* * *

><p>Despite my threats, they don't tell me why they made me drink it. The only thing they do is tell me the name of Kemi's mistress. She was Kashiwa Mona, so she was from Lady Chance's village. In fact, they tell us that Mona was her mother, and that the scientist was probably her father!<p>

Though I'm the one who brings her up, I make sure to leave out the part where she possessed Sasuke. When they ask how I know about the mistress, I lied and said that I found a bra in one of the rooms we searched. We are dismissed after I tell them the rest, so Sasuke and I are free to sneak into Ichiraku's!

"Old man Teuchi!" I greet my favorite chef loudly when I take my seat, but I'm actually worried as hell. What if he's heard the rumors and believes them?

"Why, if it isn't Naruto! I've heard some weird stuff about you lately, so I was wondering where you were off to!" I sigh in relief when I hear that his kind voice is unchanged.

"You brought a friend, Naruto-kun?" Ayame is behind the counter, too, and she's already staring at Sasuke.

"Don't you remember the Uchiha boy that Naruto always talked about?" Teuchi asks Ayame, making him the third person to yell out in front of Sasuke that I talked about him. Did I really mention him that often?

"Oh, yes, now I remember! It's Sasuke-kun, right?" When he nods, Ayame blushes coyly. Teuchi butts in by asking us for our order. Sasuke doesn't eat ramen ever, but he shrugs and just gets what I order. One large miso ramen with extra meat, come to papa!

I'm almost done with my second bowl before Sasuke's even through the toppings of his first. I hear the curtains flap behind us, so I turn to see who came in. If it's some crazy theorist again, they better be prepared for a fight!

"N-Naruto-kun? Sasuke-k-kun?" Okay, maybe not if it's Hinata. It would be like kicking a puppy! Whatever, I doubt she's here to call us fags like that drunk guy. Besides, Sakura told me none of the rookies believe the theories.

"Hinata, long time no see!" I pat the stool beside me. She nervously sits herself in the chair and meekly orders a small vegetarian bowl of ramen. Something seems to be on her mind, but I continue slurping on my noodles. It usually takes her a few minutes to get up the courage to speak.

"The...the theories are..." Hinata gets scared when I look over at her, so I smile at her encouragingly. She gulps and tries again.

"They aren't true, but Kiba-kun, he's not sure. I-I've t-tried to reason with him, b-but Kiba-kun is..." She's always trailing off, but I can fill in her thoughts.

"A stubborn ass, I know. No, Sasuke and I haven't been planning world domination and I'm not some evil genius disguised as an idiot. Obito pulled that off with acting like Tobi, but I doubt I could've done that for my whole life," I shrug and return to my food.

"Th-those aren't the theories he believes, Naruto-kun. He thinks...it was just that one r-rumor." She has to look away for a moment to collect herself. She's gotten much better at speaking to me since she confessed, but I can tell that she's always going to be shy around me.

"Which one?" Sasuke decides to be the one to ask. I know it involves him, but why would he be so curious about what rumor Kiba believes?

"S-Sasuke-kun, he suspects that you and Naruto-kun...that you've been...t-t-together since we were t-twelve," If her voice gets any smaller it would disappear. Since I'm right next to her, I hear every weird thing she says.

"And is he the only one who suspects that?" There he goes again! Why the hell does it matter?

"N-no. Honestly, I...I'm probably the only rookie left, other than Sakura-chan, who d-doesn't," I'm surprised when she forces her white eyes to look at Sasuke's Sharingan. Sadly, she gets scared off just because Sasuke raises an eyebrow.

"Okay, Sasuke and I weren't dating when we were kids, I promise," I laugh and suck down the last of my second bowl.

"I wasn't sure, N-Naruto-kun. For a m-moment, I was even...happy about the idea." Earth to Hinata, start making sense! She screws her eyes shut and clutches her knees before spitting out the rest of what she's trying to say.

"I thought that if you felt that way about Sasuke-kun, then you didn't really reject me! I started putting pieces together. I-I heard that you let the Lightning nin b-beat you up because you didn't want to tell them about Sasuke. Then, when Sasuke was declared a target, you rushed out of the village. You came back and insisted on being the only one to fight him, so everyone assumed that you were protecting him. I c-confessed, b-but you never...all because Sasuke was more important to you. If I thought of it that way, it didn't hurt so much..."

I was torn between gaping at her and staring at Sasuke, whose Sharingan is spinning for some reason. I can't even follow what she was even thinking!

"I came here t-to ask if you two are t-together now, s-since you chose Sasuke-kun as your Assistant a-and he's...still here..."

"No. We're not. Lucky you. Here, have your first date with this idiot." Without even coming close to finishing his ramen, Sasuke stalks off. I get up to chase after him, but I need to pay for the ramen. I fumble with Gama to get out the yen while apologizing to Hinata.

"I'm sorry I hurt you. I was so wrapped up in the whole Sasuke thing and then the war! Plus, I had no idea what to say other than thank you," I slow down for emphasis, "I mean it, thank you. I know it's a bit weird to say, but you reminded me of myself. The things you said about wanting to walk with me and how you were always watching me, I ended up telling Sasuke the same things. I made him my rival just because I wanted to be him. Every time I saw him alone, I wanted to talk to him and have him acknowledge me."

"There you go talking about Sasuke again!" Teuchi's hearty laugh bursts from the kitchen, and I finally see that I'm jabbering about the bastard without even registering it! Damn, I'm probably hurting her even more!

No...she's smiling at me for some reason.

"I'm sorry, Hinata. I shouldn't be talking about him, this is about you and me. You're a really important friend to me, and I-" She interrupts me by laughing a bit.

"What?"

"Just go after him already, I'll be fine!" Her smile grows, and I know that she's not just putting up a front. It's probably the first time I ever heard her not mumblr or stutter. I guess things are cleared up between us, which is great! I plant a quick kiss on her forehead before yelling goodbye to everyone. Leaving the girl who loves me behind, I chase after the bastard.

Wait, what the hell? Something's a bit backwards here. I guess I don't really mind. It feels right.

"Go back, dobe!" Sasuke snaps without looking at me. He's jumping even faster through the trees, so I have to really push it to keep up.

"What? Sasuke, I'm not dating her!" he slows down just long enough for me to grab him. Before he can protest, I pull him down to sit on the branch with me. I can't really place his expression. His eyebrows are furrowed like he's annoyed, but his eyes aren't angry and his lips aren't pressing together.

"She confessed to you."

"Yeah, well, so did Sakura and you don't see us together either!"

"Sakura?" He's surprised? It kind of pisses me off; girls can like me, too, you ass!

"Yeah. It was just her attempt to get me to forget about you and think about my own safety. I rejected her pretty fast once I saw through it." I shrug while Sasuke works it out in his head.

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why did you reject both of them?"

"For the last time, I didn't reject Hinata! For crying out loud, she had just jumped in front of Pein! At the time, those were her final words, so she just got out everything she was feeling. Hinata's not stupid! Nobody would ask someone out if they thought they were about to die!" I try to lighten the mood by talking like a snobby girl, "Yeah, um, I think you're totally hot and amazing and super awesome. Can we date? Yeah, I know I could totally die right now and all but like whatever, right?"

Sasuke stays silent and doesn't change expressions, so I keep on trucking. I stop talking like a snob, though, because that shit's creepy to hear coming from me.

"Then I had to go deal with you and the war! Even if she asked me out, it would've been pointless. That goes for Sakura, too."

"While that makes relative sense, which is surprising coming from you, why didn't you date anyone while I was in prison?" Easy enough question!

"For the same reason I didn't know you were in Konoha's prison. I barely saw anybody when I was training to become Hokage, and I never thought of anything else."

"Fair enough," he stands up on the branch, and I follow suit. We start making our way to the inn, but Sasuke still has some questions.

"What did you say to Hinata? It took you a while to get to me, so I assume you two talked?"

"I apologized, and then I thanked her. I wanted to tell her that she's an important friend and she always will be, but she interrupted me."

"That's unlike her."

"I know! She told me to go after you already and that she'd be fine."

"She told you to what?" What the hell is up with this guy? It's either silence or questions! I sigh harshly before repeating myself.

"To go after you!"

Sasuke stops for no reason, so I turn back. What did I say?

"As in?"

"What do you mean 'as in'?! You aren't making sense at all!" The people who decided that Uchihas were geniuses were probably high off their asses.

"That could mean two things, you idiot. Either she was telling you to chase me down, or she meant-," Sasuke interrupts himself before he says it.

"What, what, what, what, what!?" I'm tired of all these people who can't get a sentence out without stopping!

"Or she was telling you to date me, you idiot! Tch," he pauses to regain his composure, "Whatever you said made her think that the rumor was true. And if Hinata believes it, even Sakura's going to start wondering."

"As long as they don't think we're evil, I couldn't care less what other rumors people start believing."

"I'm just pointing out that it's already hard enough for you to get a girl interested in you. Not a single one will try if they think they'd be competing against me. Nobody would be stupid enough to try to take something that belongs to an Uchiha."

"What? I don't belong to you! If anything, you owe me so much that it should be your ass that belongs to me, teme!" It takes me a second to notice the other insult, "And, hey! It's not that hard for me to get girls! I was the village hero, you dick, they were lining up at my door!"

"You didn't date any of them?"

"I told you, I didn't have any time because of training!"

"Yet, you somehow found the time to be all over Sai?"

"The hell are you talking about? I wouldn't touch Sai with a ten foot katana! He's a creep!"

Why am I being punched for saying that? When I jump back up in branches, I glare back at Sasuke.

"You told me you teased each other all the time!" Fuck a duck, I'm caught, aren't I?

"Okay, so maybe not all the time. I gave myself one day off to hang out with Shikamaru or Sakura, and sometimes Sai would tag along. He usually makes a weird comment, and I kick his ass."

"That doesn't matter. You lied to me. I'm the only one you touch, aren't I? Why!?"

"Look, I'm sorry that I get in your personal space all the goddamn time! It's just that you were the first person who didn't push me away the second I got close!" I yell loudly enough to scare all the birds out of the trees around us. Their flapping keeps us silent for a few long seconds. When they clear, I jump over to the thick branch he's standing on and land with my left hand on his right shoulder, just like how he did two years ago.

"Last time I checked, you didn't mind getting into my space, either."

His eyes flash with recognition. After a few tense moments, Sasuke sighs and relaxes.

"I should've known it was impossible for you to follow a simple order like 'don't touch me'."

"You know me, I'm not the best with orders," I laugh, and he rolls his eyes at me.

"Fine, do what you want. Just prepare yourself for the consequences if you go too far." Yes! Sasuke is defeated! Ha! I finally won! So I can gloat a bit, I wrap my arms around his waist and hug him tightly. I feel him tense up a bit, but his arms move around my neck.

And for the shortest moment, Sasuke hugs me back.

* * *

><p>*Bibiri-kun is a less-known Japanese word, but it's what Sasuke calls Naruto waaayyy back in Part one. It pretty much means Scaredy Cat, and I thought Sasuke would be more likely to say Bibiri than Scaredy cat.<p> 


	6. Rabbit Trial: Dependence

A/N: Well, I did say that I'd be late if something happened, and something did XP! There was a blackout in my neighborhood, so fail. This chapter would already take me a while because it's Sasuke's POV and a bit...different. So I rushed and wrote the ending of this around 4:30 AM so just like...I dunno, take this one in stride XP I'll probably end up fixing up this entire story once I'm done so enjoy this rough version XP

Oh, and if you haven't already realized it, yes, there is a subplot to this that I'm using as my skeleton for the Trials and pretty much the main action conflict of this story. Thing is, too bad for you guys, that it's not going to really ever be completely spelled out in the story. If I were to do that, this would become way longer than I wanted and it just wouldn't feel like a NaruSasu fic. So, I'm planning on posting the subplot after I write the whole story. It's a bit strange, and it's all over the place, but I'll fix it up and get it up ^_^ I'll do what I can to put most of the pieces of it in my story.

In other news, 1,030 views in 10 days and 35 reviews 0-0? AWESOME! *~*~*~* I really love all the reviews I've read, really. And special thanks to everyone who reviews every chapter. That is just... 3!

Hope you enjoy your trip through the sixth chapter of The Trials!

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><p><em>Trial 5: Dependence<em>

His weird touching usually catches me off-guard. Since he's done it enough times, I've steeled myself against it. However, this didn't prepare me for that simple hug. I'm so used to him being invasive that my body tensed when I felt his arms wrap around me. I was expecting purring, biting, laughing, anything that I'm used to, but nothing happened.

A breeze made my bangs reach towards him, and I let my arms follow. The few seconds I allowed myself to hold on to him felt like an embarrassing eternity. I couldn't stand to see what I was doing, but shutting my eyes made it worse. Without my sight, I could feel each individual finger pressing into me and count the times our chests pushed together as we breathed in. His body warmth was seeping through my skin. It numbed me and made me more aware at the same time.

That's the fifth time my mind replayed that scene! This is the most vivid it's been all night, however. I feel numb again, and my blanket feels like it's the same temperature as Naruto. For some reason, the warmth feels like it's against my back instead of where I felt it earlier. My mind must be playing tricks on me.

Then again, I don't recall him snoring, either.

My eyes rip open as I try to wrench away, but the sleeping idiot has a vice-like grip. From his face to his feet, every part of him is pressed against me. One of his legs managed to push itself between mine, and my neck is resting on his arm.

And he...he just keeps...ugh! Damn it, you moron! Stop nuzzling me!

I stop struggling as fast as I start. My escape plan presents itself when his head slides behind mine. Cracking my head against his, he finally wakes up. His complaints only last as long as it takes for him to notice what he's doing.

"Well, damn," He's laughing? "Hope you slept well!" The cocky bastard dares to hug me before getting up and going into the bathroom. I wait until the numbness fades before I pick myself up from the futon. Running on auto-pilot, I put both our futons and blankets away and start a pot of black tea.

When he sits at the table, I open my mouth to yell at him for this morning. A knock at the door interrupts me. Growling, I go to see who it is. Once again, it's the innkeeper with our Trial. This one, for no reason that's immediately apparent to me, is contained in a box that's labeled with Naruto's name. I quietly thank and dismiss the innkeeper before placing the box in front of Naruto.

"My name is on it?" He raises an eyebrow as he opens the wooden lid. As usual, there is a scroll, but a suspicious eyedropper bottle is packaged with it. When Naruto is finished reading the scroll, I reach out for it, but he pulls it away from me.

"Why can't I read it?" I snap, but I don't reach for it again.

"It's part of the Trial," He's talking to me, but his eyes are looking far away.

"Whatever. What's the objective?" He should at least be able to tell me what we're even doing.

"We have to search a medic school. There was a fire in it a few years ago, so nobody has been in there for a while. If we can, we're supposed to find another one of those liquids. This one is red and bubbling. Even if we can't find that, we're supposed to gather any information on that scientist from our last Trial. Kemu was a professor there, apparently," he mutters everything he says and doesn't look at me.

"Naruto, we're only on the Rabbit Trial, but these Trials all seem related. With the exception of the Fire Ceremony, we've been searching places that involve that Lady Chance in some way."

"This one isn't that related to her, is it?" He finally looks over to me when he talks. Good, it's unnerving when he's lost in his thoughts. It almost makes him look like he's not an idiot.

"Of course it is. This scientist, Professor Kemu, he was her father. We've searched her dad's house and her village. What is so interesting about this woman that the elders turned your Trials into an investigation of her life and family?" I finish my drink and move to put my weapons together in preparation.

"We'll ask when we report to them again," He speaks up suddenly when I reach for my katana, "Don't bring that this time, okay?"

"Why not?" I prop the katana against the wall again and turn to him. Without me knowing, he had gotten up to stand right behind me. In his hand is the weird bottle that came with the Trial.

"Look, the scroll isn't really clear about this stuff. I'm only allowed to give it to you every ten minutes, no matter what you say. If I don't give this to you, we fail the Trial. Thing is, I don't trust the elders, not since they made me drink that vial," He should knows that I would never trust the elders.

"I doubt they would make you give me something deadly,"

"I would kill them," his firm declaration stuns me a bit.

"Naruto?" I try to start, but he hugs me. I'm not sure if I want to know what the scroll said if this is how he's reacting to it.

"Sasuke, please take it. If it hurts you at all, I'll run you straight to Sakura."

"You'd be forfeiting the Trial, you can't-"

"Fuck the Trials! For all we know, this whole thing is just an elaborate scheme to kill us. Maybe the stuff I drank really was supposed to kill me, but it failed. This time though," he laughs bitterly, "They know it would take us both out if they had me kill you."

"What the hell are you talking about? How would we both die if I'm poisoned?"

"I'd wait until after I'm finished with them, but it's just," he pulls away only slightly so he can look me straight in the eyes. When I see into them, I know just what he's thinking. He takes a deep breath, then breaks our gaze.

"Open your mouth a bit," I hear the bottle opening behind me. I hesitate for a few moments, considering if I could run away. He has a pretty firm grip on me, so I doubt that I have that choice. He pulls the full eyedropper out to show me. It's full of a milky liquid that I can't identify.

I'm immune to many poisons thanks to my time with Orochimaru, but I'm sure that the elders would do their research on me enough to know what poisons they could use. If I can't identify it, it's probably not something I'm immune to.

"Please," he begs me quietly, and I take another second. Slowly, I let my lips part enough for the eyedropper. He brings it close to my mouth, but pulls it away suddenly. In the same motion, he...

He...

Naruto kisses me. He pulls away as fast as he started, but the damage to my mind is done. I try to put the pieces of my shattered thoughts together as he starts talking.

"Ah, you know, that was, I mean," he babbles for a second as the blush on his face grows deeper, "It's the only thing I could think of doing to apologize in advance if this goes badly."

Dobe...

With the small part of me that could still think straight, I tell my hand to move. It slides over the hand he's using to hold the eyedropper and pulls it closer. I shut my eyes and place my lips around it. With one squeeze to his hand, the liquid is pushed into my mouth.

As soon as it absorbs into me, I start swaying. Something deep in my stomach churns, and everything is thrown out of balance.

My chakra, it's my chakra that's wrong. Is it? That's not my blood, no. I try to suppress my chakra, but I can't get a hold of it. My Sharingan feels like it's spinning backwards. I can't believe what I see when look around with my Eternal Mangekyou.

It was like the room wasn't ours anymore. Everything is so clean and white, but colors soon start spilling from the corners of the room. Blue smears down the wall, while yellow bleeds into the floor. Drops of dye fall onto my hands, and I stare at it as it travels up my arm guard.

"Sasuke?" the sound echoes many times, softly, loudly, but I know it's his voice. I reach out, then realize that he's right here. His warmth, which used to make me feel pins and needles, is now making my nerves explode wherever our bodies touch. Wanting to feel more of this strange sensation, I drag my hands through his shining, golden hair. I stare into his eyes, watching the glowing blue undulate like ocean waves.

"Sasuke, are you okay?"

Nuzzling my face against his neck sends shock waves through me. He must know how great it feels for me, since he's picking me up and holding me in his arms. I look around us as we move through the forest. We must be going faster than time, I feel like I can see us passing it in a stream of vivid colors. While we run towards forever, I feel a literal bubble of laughter in my throat. Needing it out so it doesn't choke me, I open up. With every giggle, a colored bubble floats out and surrounds us. I laugh enough so that we can float on these bubbles.

"I brought the Trial scroll, but are you sure we should be doing this?" the glistening Naruto asks me, and I can't help but grin at his beauty.

"We should do everything. We can do anything," When I speak, I can see the words writing themselves on the trees around us.

"Sure, Sasuke. Whatever you say,"

"I'm not saying it! The trees are, don't you get it?" Everything I'm saying is being told to me through these trees, I know it. Whatever they say, no matter what it is, I have to say it. If Nature is speaking, it must be important!

"No, I really don't," Naruto is stupid for questioning the Earth, but he'll know soon. I just have to tell him what I'm seeing.

"Can you see the little hearts beating in the leaves, Naruto?" Just one would nearly be unnoticeable, but since they're all pounding at one tempo, I can feel them.

"How about we get you away from these trees, huh?" He runs faster, and I see the trees crying yellow tears and waving goodbye to me. I wave back, swishing the pink air around with my hand. It smells like watermelon, though I didn't know watermelon had a scent before this. I'm sure that's what I'm smelling. Sweet watermelon...

In a blink, we enter a large, gray building. In here, there is no warmth, not even from Naruto's chest. It's colorless, lifeless, and it makes me cry inky tears.

"Open your mouth for me, Sasuke. It's been ten minutes," I watch as he pulls the bottle from the some place in his mouth, I think. I open up obediently, but my mind takes over. Though I can see him clearly away from me, I feel Naruto's mouth over mine. The eyedropper pressing into me transforms into his playful tongue. After exploring my mouth for a few mind-blowing moments, his tongue becomes dripping wet. I moan as the sweet liquid drips down my throat.

The hallway, which had been a drab gray, was now a symphony of textures and colors so bright that I have to squint. Every picture on the wall dances around in time to the beautiful music I'm hearing. I sing along with it, following as the tune get more complex. The notes I sing materialize and spiral down the hallway before disappearing into a spinning, blue light.

"Sasuke, I'm going to take a quick look into these rooms. Please, don't wander off," He places me on the floor and I float on it. It wiggles and bounces with every step he takes away from me. Sliding through a green waterfall, Naruto leaves me alone.

Some part of me knows that what I'm seeing is impossible, but it's just so beautiful...

Dragging my fingers across the floor, I draw pictures of animals. They come to life and start flying and prancing around me. Remembering that this is the Trial of the fluffy bunnies, I draw a few. They multiply quickly, as rabbits often do. I pet every one that comes near me. They're so adorable...

But then one bunny I pet falls over.

The next loses all its fur.

And the third bursts into flames.

When they see their fallen friends, the rabbits turn to face me. There's a lot of cracking noises, and they start changing into grotesque monsters. Their skins rip where they grow too fast, and their claws turn into curled daggers. With a horrible squelch, their eyes rip from their heads and float towards me. Eyes start opening all throughout the bleeding walls, and all of them stare at me in judgement. I try to run, but a white-hot iron bar explodes from the wall and strangles me. All I can do is scream as the fanged monsters tear into my flesh.

"Sasuke! What's wrong?" Swinging a sword of light, Naruto slays all the monsters and stabs the wall to make it let go of me. My blood stains him as he holds me in his arms.

"Is it the drug?" Aw, he's worried about me, "It's only been seven minutes, I can't give it to you just yet. Hang in there, okay? I think I know where the main office is, so I should be able to find Kemu's record soon."

"I don't know how long I have, Naruto. I'm bleeding!" I wail and hold onto him, clinging on to the few moments I have left.

"No, you're not, Sasuke. It's just in your head. You're fine!"

When I look down to see if he's right, I see that I don't have any mark on me. He must have healed me!

"You saved me!" I repeat that a few times as he picks me up, because my voice sounds like it's barely above a whisper.

"Shh, it's okay. Yes, you're welcome. Just a couple more seconds," I can't feel the warmth of his chest anymore, and all color is drained from him. It's like...he's a corpse, he's dead, Naruto is dead!

"Naruto! Please, don't die, Naruto!"

"Just one more minute!"

"You're going to die in a minute!" The walls break like mirrors and plunge us into a black abyss. My world is breaking, and Naruto is dying!

"No, no, I'm not!"

"Don't leave me!"

"Just take this!" he shoves the eyedropper in my mouth, and soon the world turns white. The red fades away, and Naruto gets his brilliant colors back.

I feel like I could sleep, but I can't. I feel strong, like I could level a building with one punch, but I'm too tired to move.

"We'll only stay here for ten more minutes, I promise. Whether or not I find this record, we're out of here! Okay?" With the few moments of clarity I have, I can see the halls of the medic school form around me. It's not long before purples and oranges stain the walls and create a strange scene once again. Carrying me on his back, Naruto runs through the rooms as quickly as he can, searching for the record.

I close my eyes only once, then open them back up to a torturous red hell. It gets hotter and hotter, until I'm watching the skin melt right off of Naruto. Soon, it's his blackened skeleton that's running me around. I scream, trying to push him away, but the bones close around me tighter.

"This has to be it!" When he keens this, his jaw breaks and dangles from his skull. When we move again, the building protests it. The walls reveal the true form of this school. Entangled tentacles replaced the walls, and they reach for us. The end of the hall becomes the face of a multi-eyed beast. It parts itself down the center, baring rows of serrated teeth. Naruto's skeleton pushes on faster and flings us into the monster.

We burst through the back of the beast in a bloody explosion. Speeding through the burning trees, we reach the gates of Hell. We run on the spiked edges of the gates and break into a demon prison. Once we run through many fiery halls, I'm thrown down in front of two growling demons.

"What is this shit?" Naruto screams, spraying another dose of it into my mouth. The scene clears itself of horror and shows that we're in front of the Konoha elders. My skin is soaking with a cold sweat and my breathing is erratic.

"Did you find the red chemical?" Koharu asks, ignoring the records that Naruto flung in front of her.

"No! It's not like I had the time to! I was only in there for a few minutes before Sasuke starting screaming! What are you making me give him?" His voice fades into white noise.

"Well, it was to make your Trial more difficult, originally. However, we would suggest that you keep him like this," It's Mitokado who suggests this, but his head is replaced with that of a rabbit.

"Why the fuck would I ever want to keep Sasuke like this, huh?"

"If he's dependent on you for the chakra drug, he won't cause any problems," says Koharu, who is now a huge tortoise.

"He'd make a pretty shitty Assistant if he can't go a minute without freaking out!"

"We would allow you to have another. You could have Shikamaru, or that Sakura girl. You have the Uchiha under control now, so he wouldn't need to die. Isn't that all you wanted in the first place?" It takes all of my concentration to hear them speak.

"I want him to be safe and okay! I don't know what you guys are thinking, but there's no deal. I'm taking him to Sakura!" Naruto smashes a foot down on the table, splintering it like he did the last time.

"What if you don't have the option? Unless, of course, you don't want to become Hokage?"

"No. Deal." Naruto stares Koharu down, and I see her turn twelve different shades of purple. After forever, Mitokado dismisses us.

"Prepare yourself for the Trial tomorrow, boys," Without missing a beat, Naruto pulls me into his arms and drags me to what must be the hospital. It looks like a giant flower to me.

Sakura's voice bounces off the walls, and that's the last thing I hear before I feel a needle...

* * *

><p>"Sasuke-kun?" It's a bit mottled, but I'm getting my hearing back.<p>

"Am I okay?" I don't want to admit it, but I'm too frightened to open my eyes to see what hell I could be waking up into.

"It took a few rounds of pulling the drug out, but you're detoxed now. Five of us spent a few hours just trying to get your chakra to flow correctly. But yes, you're okay," Her hand on my forehead feels normal, so I dare to open my eyes. Nothing in the hospital room is out of place, and I don't feel my Sharingan spinning anymore.

"Sasuke?" Now that he's no longer a skeleton, I don't have any problem looking at Naruto, "I thought about it for a while. I think that drug was the same one that was in the mask I put on. Obviously, that mask was a lot weaker than whatever was in that bottle."

Now that I can think clearly, my memories of what the elders said earlier come back. If I'm clean, that means Naruto didn't take them up on their offer.

"You're so stupid," I whisper because of the rawness of my throat. I must've been screaming constantly for it to hurt this badly.

"For giving you that stuff, yeah, I know. I'm sorry,"

"No," I stop him with a harsher whisper, "For getting it out of me." Naruto's eyes fly open.

"There was no way in hell I was going to control you like that, Sasuke," Naruto's growling, but I know it's not at me. If he didn't trust the elders before, there's no way he ever would now.

"Sasuke-kun, you would've eventually needed an IV of that drug. Without one, you'd constantly experience nightmarish hallucinations. What Naruto did was the only option," Sakura speaks gently. I can't decide if I should glare at her or continue glaring at Naruto.

"There is never only one option. If he didn't feel like having me as his slave, he could take me off the drug, and I'd probably kill myself. I'd starve myself because I would think the food was poisoned," Despite the pain in my throat, I'm hissing, "He had options!"

"Didn't I tell you earlier, teme? You're not going to die because of me," Naruto can't hit me, so he just squeezes my hand tightly. I have no rebuttal, so I give my throat a break and stay silent.

Apparently, these rooms can't stay quiet for longer than twenty seconds. That's how long it takes for Sai to slide open the door and stroll in.

"Oh! Sasuke-kun, it's you! When Sakura said she was helping out Sasuke, I thought it was someone with the same name," He gives me an obviously fake smile, "I hope you're well!"

"Sai, don't start anything. He's still recovering," Sakura warns him, but I notice something odd. From the moment he came through the door, her attention was exclusively on him.

"I apologize, Sakura. I didn't come to fight. I just wanted to ask Naruto about these theories," he has the audacity to sit down at the foot of my bed. If I wasn't too weak right now, he'd be dead the moment he placed a hand on one of my blanketed legs.

"Leave him alone, Sai. If you got questions, ask me," Naruto balls his fists and threatens Sai. Taking the hint, he pulls his hand away from me.

"So, I assume that one of the rumors are true?" It didn't take much guessing to know which one he was referring to.

"Which one would that be, Sai?" The slow idiot doesn't pay enough attention to be able to understand things right away.

"The one that says you two are lovers. Personally, I was shocked when I heard it," He closes his eyes like he's amused by something, "I didn't think either of you would be smart enough to notice it. Everyone else knew this whole time, of course, but neither of you showed any signs of realizing it. We're so proud!"

"What the hell, Sai? You're the one who asked me if I liked Sakura before!" Naruto blushes slightly, as if he just became aware that Sakura was in the room.

"Yes, I did. And, you got Sasuke back. That was your promise to her, right? You told me that if you could fulfill that promise that you'd be able to tell her how you felt. I watched and waited, but you never even approached her."

"I was training, Sai! I'm doing the Trials to become the Hokage!" Naruto springs up from his seat, ready for a fight.

"You could've done these Trials with Sakura instead of Sasuke-kun," Sai stays on the bed. His only reaction is a small, faked smirk.

"You don't know anything, Sai. Sasuke would've been killed if I didn't choose him as my Assistant!"

"Fair enough. How about once you become Hokage? Will you ask her out then?"

"Sai, what are you-" Sakura gets interrupted by Sai, who keeps addressing Naruto like he's the only other one in the room.

"If you don't, what if he does?" I'm watching Naruto's face as Sai speaks, and all the anger drains out of him with Sai's last point. There's a few moments of tense silence as Naruto glares down at Sai, who is unfazed by everything, it seems. So, this is what Sai's teasing is really like.

"If you take too long, Naruto, someone will get to her before you. It could be him. In fact, if neither of you step in, I'll try. I've gotten to know her very well these past years while you were too busy training to get Sasuke back," Sai's words shock Sakura enough to make her body go rigid.

"I don't give a damn, alright? As long as she's happy, I'll support her!" Naruto flings his arms out in exasperation. This strange scene is giving me a headache, I wish they would just leave me alone.

"I have no doubt that you'd be able to make her happy, Naruto. Thing is, would you be able to do it at the price of Sasuke's happiness? You'd be pulling him back into society just to leave him stranded in it. Again."

That's the last straw for Naruto, who launches himself over my bed to tackle Sai to the ground. Sakura grabs both of them and holds them off the ground by their collars. I know she's gotten strong, but this is a bit too much.

"I'm right here, you idiots! Sai, stop antagonizing Naruto. He's done all he can for Sasuke, okay? It's not his fault that he didn't know Sasuke was put in jail, the elders lied to him! He's just trying to make up for it," She puts them down and crosses her arms, "And as for the dating thing," she takes a quick, apologetic glance my way, "I don't see myself dating Sasuke-kun."

"Really? After attempting to cut your head off with a Chidori, you don't think I would make a good boyfriend anymore? Did you realize this while I was choking you, or after I tried to stab you with your own kunai?" I'm honestly a bit amused, since she spoke as if it would be a painful surprise to me.

"No, it took me a bit longer than that to come to terms with it," her voice is shaking, but she's smiling a little bit.

"I thought you knew how you felt before you tried to kill me," I sit up straight, finally feeling some of my strength returning.

"Sasuke-kun, I'm really glad I didn't hurt you back then. Naruto explained what you were feeling at the time, and assured me that you wouldn't be like that ever again," she walks over and takes my hand, "I've forgiven you, obviously, but I don't think I can see you in a romantic light anymore."

"Sorry, but I'm not disappointed by that," I speak bluntly, but I squeeze her hand slightly. When I do, her answering smile is genuine and free of any flirtatiousness.

"Besides, I wouldn't be able to stand it, being with either of you," Sakura includes Naruto with a look.

"With either of us?" Dobe's taken aback when he's suddenly addressed.

"Yeah. It would be hard to date someone if I know that I'm not their most important person," she giggles. Before Naruto or I can speak, she says her goodbyes and tries to pull Sai out of the room.

"Bye-bye, Naruto! I'm glad your penis has a use now!" Sai waves his fingers tauntingly while grinning at Naruto.

"What? Fuck you, Sai!"

"Let's not make Sasuke-kun jealous, Naruto!" Sakura smacks Sai and slams the sliding door behind them.

So, Naruto wasn't kidding about Sai, but what did he mean by all that?

Something about it having a use now, and not making me jealous? Jealous because he said...

Oh...

That's a first. We've been called lovers, but I assume they mean we're involved romantically. Not...sexually.

We're left in the awkward aftermath of the encounter. As much as I wanted to deny it, the whole thing was alluding to Naruto and I being together. Once again, I'm forced to think about it. It's becoming a daily thing, and it happens every time we speak to anybody. Normally, I let Naruto deal with who ever we're talking to. So far, that has revealed a few things itself. I found out about how Sakura and Hinata both confessed to him, though he didn't do anything about it.

He didn't do anything about it...

Come to think of it, he never really does anything about this rumor, either. Even if they're asking him, he never says outright that we aren't. Isn't he the type to yell out that he doesn't like men and just leave it at that?

Men? No, I don't think they mean that. They're specifically saying that he likes me. Not like there's a difference, I'm obviously a man. Point is, they aren't asking if we're...gay.

That's the word. Now it's in my head, damn it.

They're asking if we like each other. If we're together already.

"Man, I guess I lost that shot, huh?" Naruto laughs a bit before sitting down where he was earlier. I follow him with my eyes, not paying much attention to what he's saying.

"I hope Sai wasn't joking about asking Sakura out. To be honest, he's a good match for her," I thought Naruto hated Sai?

"You're not upset at all?" I'm starting to become uncomfortable with sitting upright, so I lay back down, "I thought you really liked her."

"I'll always love her, don't get me wrong. It just never got the chance to turn into anything romantic, so it is what it is," he shrugs, as if it doesn't bother him at all that he won't ever be with his childhood crush.

"Frankly, I never saw you as the type to be alone, but at this rate, you're going to be married to your position as Hokage," He's turned down Hinata, and now he's been turned down, in a way, by Sakura. What other options could he possibly have?

"If I get married, I get married. If I don't, oh well, but I'll never be alone. I have my friends, I have my village, and I have you,"

"So, I'm not included in your friends?" It's weird to picture his large group of friends, then myself standing alone.

"Ah, well," he scratches the back of his head, succumbing to his nervous habit, "You're in that group, too, but you set yourself apart, in a way."

"How so?"

"You...well, you know. You're my friend, but you're also other things. You've always been multiple things to me."

"Like brother, or whatever it is you used to call me?" I'm bringing up all the memories of the different things he's called me.

"You're whatever I need you to be. You can be my rival, my goal, my team mate. I've seen you as my friend, my brother, and," he pauses and looks away, "My most important person."

"I don't have many important people left in my life. Even fewer have ever done so much for me. If even Itachi entrusted me to you, I doubt my most important person could be anybody but you," As round-about as I'm being, his bright smile assures me that he understands.

"You know, you're also my teme. That's a title no one else has," His teme? That doesn't make any sense to me, the dobe is just saying that I'm his bastard, that doesn't have any meaning. Well, actually...

"That makes you my dobe, right?"

"Your one and only! Of course, until you find yourself a girlfriend or whatever," He laughed, but something about his sentence is off.

"What do you mean 'or whatever'?" Is he implying what I think he is?

"What?" His confusion only lasts for a second before he gasps, "Oh! No, no, I don't mean that! I meant until you found a girlfriend or someone else that would be your dobe! I didn't mean or a boyfriend," He said it.

"This is pretty ironic," my eyes roll when he starts to get too flustered.

"Ironic?" Obviously, he has horrible short-term memory.

"You're the one that kissed me, yet you're implying that I'm the gay one?" If he'll say boyfriend out loud, I can say gay.

"Oh, right, about that," His hands start gripping his knees until his knuckles are white.

"Don't say you were teasing me," As strange as I'm feeling, I can keep my calm facade.

"I wasn't. Really, I thought that the drug or this detox would make you forget about it."

"My memory isn't nearly as bad as yours, dobe," Naruto sighs while wiping his face with his hands.

"Then remember what I said! I told you that it was just in case you did get hurt. It was my apology."

"You could've just apologized the normal way," Though I say that, I know that sorry wouldn't have been sufficient in that situation.

"If that's what you want, then fine. I'm sorry I kissed you," I can tell he's getting a bit irritated, but it's not often that people ask him to explain why he did something. Knowing him, most of what he does is instinctual, so it's hard to come up with real reasons.

"I don't need an apology for that. Just know that I'll be expecting a real reason if you ever do it again," By reason I mean a life or death situation. But of course, dobe doesn't think the same way I do.

"I promise, if I ever do it again, you'll know my reason."

"And that would be?"

"There might be an accident where you would need my help, but that would be mouth-to-mouth. If I kiss you on purpose again, it'll mean something."

"You're being vague," I warn him, and he starts looking uncomfortable again.

"But you know what I mean!"

"Would it just be to tease me? I'd beat the hell out of you if you did that,"

"No, you bastard. I'll make this easy. If I kiss you, it means I like you. That's what it usually means anyway!"

"You already like me, dobe," I'm not stupid, I know what he means, but he needs to clarify. The rule needs to be set properly.

"Damn it, Sasuke. I mean _romantically_! If I kiss you, I'm saying I want to be with you romantically. Fuckin' A, this is a straight-forward thing!"

"Why do you do that, dobe?" It's a quick change of subject, so it catches him off guard.

"What did I do? Say Fuckin' A? I don't say it to refer to anything like that, I mean-" He needs to shut up and listen, for once.

"You never deny it when people assume you're gay," When I say the word, Naruto winces a bit. I'm not the only one who's been avoiding that line of thought.

"Well, how the hell am I supposed to know? You don't know that sort of thing until you just realize it. There's always the possibility," Naruto, by definition, is an animal of instinct, so I can tell that he's just saying the first thing that comes to his mind.

It doesn't put me at ease to know that Naruto could suddenly "realize" that he's gay.

Or, hypothetically, what if I realize it first? I'm trying to figure out who I am, so I'm not about to deny anything I find out. What if that's the outcome?

What if, despite not knowing much about the subject, I already know the answer?

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><p>Oh, wow. Well, read and review please ^-^<p> 


	7. Dragon Trial: Adversaries

A/N: nope, don't own Naruto. Okay, whatever, that doesn't matter right now. This is hella late for two reasons. One: Libreoffice decided to break the five pages I had written last night, so I had to do it all over again today. I think it came out better, so whatever. Another reason is that a couple days ago, I found out that I had lice after dying my hair frikken green by accident with kool aid. So I'm there with green and pink hair and lice, and so I chopped off my bangs. So they're boyshort now, but whatever. Then I had to go and dye my hair a dark black/burgundy. I love being blond, so this was a bit of a downer. By now, I kind of like how it looks on me. My girlfriend has yet to see it in person. Plus, I burnt my hand :(

And to be quite honest, I was a little sad with how few reviews and views I got for the last chapter, though I loved the ones I got. I hope to get a lot more of both for this one, since it's has a few subjects from the manga that anybody can comment on ^_^

Random addition: I'm American, but I use centimeters and kilometers in here because that's what they use. I catch myself wanting to say "A few feet away" or "Just one more inch..." heheh~ But I don't!

Read and review this chapter, and start thinking of recommending this fic to other NaruSasu fans you know ^_^

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><p><em>Trial 6: Adversaries<em>

Maybe it's the come-down from the drugs, or whatever the nurse gave him, but Sasuke is sleeping like a log. I probably shouldn't be watching him sleep, since it's pretty damn creepy, but I don't want him to wake up alone in Konoha. For all I know, he'll take that time to work out a reason why he should leave and go through with it.

Fine, I'm being a bit paranoid, but I can't help it. I can't stand the idea of him leaving again. Unlike the first time, it would be my personal failure if he left, because it would mean he would rather be in some unfamiliar place than be with me. Wait, that's wrong, I mean that he would want to go away from Konoha, which just happens to include me!

Is there anything wrong about thinking that I'm important to him?

He moves for the first time since he fell asleep, so I figure that he's either waking up or the drugs wore off enough for him to sleep normally. Since he's not glaring or tensing up, Sasuke looks very young. Well, actually, it's more like he looks his age. This guy is only eighteen and he already lived through his clan massacre, was cursed by Orochimaru, became a missing nin, killed an S-rank criminal, avenged his clan, obtained the Eternal Mangekyou, fought in a war, spent a year in jail, and was put on death row. It's no surprise that he looks much older when he's awake!

I've been through some shit, too, but I manage to still act like a kid. During the years he was gone, I spent a lot of time wondering why we turned out so differently. Though it's not the only possibility, there's one answer that makes sense to me. When I was a kid, I was searching for friends and companionship to make my life easier, so I opened myself up as much as possible. Sasuke, on the other hand, believed that friends would make him stray from his goals. That's something that Sasuke himself told me, and it seems to apply for the whole time he was gone.

So, if that's why Sasuke is still having problems, all he should need is a few good friends, right? He's technically "allowed" to have close bonds now that he isn't an avenger. I never let him break our bond even when he was going insane, so now I have to make our bond even stronger.

Somehow, I think the Fire Ceremony gave us a good start.

All my friends claiming that I'm with Sasuke doesn't help my case! He wouldn't admit it, but anybody would be scared if they had to go from having no friends to having a sexual relationship.

Oh man...

Sex with Sasuke. It sounds like some porno, one that every chick in Konoha would watch immediately. I'm not so sure they'd watch it if I was the one fucking Sasuke.

Damn you, Sai! This is not a topic I should be thinking about ever! I don't even know how two guys would even have sex, it's not like Jiraiya wrote about that sort of relationship! I should know, I read one of his books. A few years ago, I was bored by Icha Icha Tactics within a couple pages, but I managed to find the time to read Icha Icha Paradise. Honestly, I wasn't paying much attention to the story. All that mattered was that the words were written by Jiraya...

Out of curiosity's sake, I might just ask Kakashi about it. I've seen him lurking around porno stores plenty of times to know that Icha Icha isn't the only thing he's read. Maybe he knows how the hell two guys would do anything.

Oh fuck, then he'd think I'm trying to get into Sasuke's pants! Could I ask Iruka-sensei then? No way, that's a stupid idea, and I doubt he knows either.

Fine, dirty magazines have been my old stand-by whenever it came to anything to do with sex, so I'll just find one that includes gay guys! If I look hard enough, I could find one that explains it in simple enough terms.

Um, why exactly do I need to know it, anyway? Let's see, um...

I know! The villagers, since they're accusing Sasuke and I of doing whatever it says, I should at least know what they think. Who knows, maybe there's some way I can prove that we're virgins. Sasuke's a virgin, right? Fuckin' A...

He better be one! If he isn't, I'm going to find a way to bring Orochimaru back so I can tear him to pieces and burn him. Or, what about that Karin girl he used to travel with? Didn't he also have two guys on his team? Their names were Jugo and Suigetsu, right?

I probably have nothing to worry about. For how strongly he reacts to my simple teasing, he'd most likely kill anybody who tried to fuck him.

Would he try to kill me?

Okay, it's settled! When we get back to the other village, I'll find a porn shop. I'll buy a gay magazine out of curiosity and just in case, not because I want to do anything with Sasuke. I'll find out how gay guys have sex and I'll see if I like guys and girls. See, that has nothing to do with Sasuke!

Speaking of him, he's starting to wake up. I push off from my seat, and have to sit down immediately when a shock wave runs through me. Looking down at the source of the shock, I notice that thinking about sex causes problems.

Shit, his eyes are nearly open! He can't wake up and see me like this! I mean, what a way to say "Good morning, Sasuke! I was thinking about you!" Anything, I need to do something to get this to go away! Oh no, no, no, he's rubbing his eyes! Quick! Tsunade yelling at me, dead kittens, old people, Sakura punching me, Tsunade and an old guy having sex and punching each other with dead kittens! Go down, damn it! Fuck!

"Dobe, what was that?" His groggy voice sounds like he's whispering, but I have no way of knowing. In desperation, I whacked my head against the wall, hoping the pain would snap me out of it. I'm facing the wall, so even if it's still there, Sasuke can't see. Luckily, my plan worked, but I'll never be able to stop thinking about Tsunade and some old guy doing it. Ew.

"I, uh, tripped and hit my head against the wall. That doesn't matter! Are you hungry? The food here really isn't bad, I should know, I've been here a lot! This one time, I needed food and this nurse-"

"Can't you at least wait a minute before rambling? I just woke up," Thanks, Sasuke. I needed to be interrupted or else I'd keep vomiting out words.

"Sorry, teme. I'll just go get the food," Taking the opportunity, I run like hell out of the room and find the hospital kitchen. The nurses look at me weird when I stop to catch my breath, but I don't care. Hell, for all I know, they believe some of the theories about Sasuke and I. That doesn't matter at the moment, I just need food.

Some of the nurses had prepared some simple rice and salmon for the hospital guests, so I take that for Sasuke. After searching through the cabinets, I find some cup ramen! Once it's cooked, I bring all of the food to Sasuke's room.

I should have knocked. Of course he would get ready when I'm out of the room!

"Oh, uh, hey, food," I hold them up defensively in front of me. He's glaring at me, but he doesn't have much to worry about. He's wearing pants, he just didn't get to putting on a shirt. What catches my interest is that he's wearing the high arm guards already. I've seen a similar look on some of the girls in dirty magazines, so it looks kinky on Sasuke. If those arm guards were all he was wearing...

"Ah, well, I'll just let you finish getting ready!" I scream out and leave the food on a table right next to the door before flying out of there. Without stopping, I ram my head right into the wall on the other side of the hallway. I'm too dizzy to stand, so I sink to the floor and rub where I hit my head. At least it did the job.

"You idiot, I'm not eating ramen," I lift my head to see that Sasuke is dressed and has opened the door. In his hand is the cup ramen I had made for myself.

"Oh, yeah, forgot about that. It's mine," I'm a bit shaky, but I get to my feet and take the ramen. He lets me back into the room, and I go to sit on my chair. It's my chair now because I slept in it all night, even though it's an uncomfortable metal bitch.

I slurp my ramen, hoping that I'll shut up as long as I have food in my mouth. Sasuke's already finished with his food, so he sits back down on his bed, facing me.

"What are we doing about these Trials?" Good question, it takes me a second of consideration to figure out the answer.

"I don't really have a choice, so I want to continue with the Trials. Before we do, I say we go talk to Tsunade. She's never there when we're reporting, so I want to see what she says."

"Right, that seems like our only option. We can ask her if the elders ever suggested that they were going to try to get rid of both of us," Hey! Sasuke's actually figuring out that he can trust people here!

"Then again, she might have heard the theories. Perhaps she never went to our report meetings because she was looking into them. I know she trusts you, but she could believe that I'm manipulating you. You do realize she doesn't have a high opinion of me?"

He has a point again. Tsunade came here right after Itachi fucked with his mind. Sasuke wasn't right after that until now. She almost allowed his death, after all the work I put into getting him back. I'm the one who told her the good things about Sasuke, but she never saw them herself.

"In that case, we really should see her. You can show her that you've changed, and I'll try to make it obvious that I'm not being manipulated."

"How do you plan on doing that?" His arms are crossed, so he probably expects a plan of some sort. After a few moments, I get a good idea.

"Ino! Or her father, which ever. Some Yamanaka. There's also a lot of ANBU specialized in detecting genjutsu. We get a group of them to check me out and see that you haven't done anything," I see Sasuke mull this over for a moment before shrugging.

"Let's go. I want to get out of the village as soon as possible," I feel the same way, so I throw out my empty ramen cup and find Sakura. She wishes us good luck and checks Sasuke out of the hospital.

Without missing a beat, I drag Sasuke through the Hokage Tower and run straight to the Hokage's office. This time, Izumo and Kotetsu are guarding her room. I grab at the handles, but two arms get thrown in front of me. I yell out and take a few step backs.

"Uzumaki-san, Uchiha-san, do you have an appointment with the Hokage?"

"The hell, you guys, what happened to calling me Naruto? And no, we don't have an appointment, but when have I ever needed one?" I catch Izumo glaring at Sasuke, so I step in front of Sasuke protectively.

"You can never be too careful," Kotetsu, who used to happily greet me, is now treating me like I'm a monster!

"I can't believe you guys! The rumors aren't true, Sasuke and I aren't planning anything!"

"The Hokage is busy. Get an appointment and come back later," Fuck you, Izumo!

"Bullshit! Tsunade! You old hag! Get the fuck out here!" I scream as loud as I can, making sure that she can hear me.

"What the hell is going on out here?" Tsunade swings the doors open, hitting Kotetsu and Izumo in the face with them.

"Baa-chan, we need to talk. Now. I don't care if you're busy," I growl, taking her and Sasuke's hands and dragging them into her office. I let them both go to slam the doors. Taking a few moments to calm down, I turn around and walk over to the large window.

"You seem to be doing well, Uchiha. I heard you were in the hospital,"

"Because he was fucking drugged! By those damn elders!" Okay, so I can't calm down very fast. Looking out over the people who used to be my friends and admirers doesn't help much, either, so I take a chair and sit down.

"I heard they were going to use a mild hallucinogenic on him."

"You call that shit mild? He was addicted to it! They wanted me to keep him on it so he'd become dependent on me. Did you approve that shit?" Well, this isn't turning out how I planned. If I don't calm down, she'll be pissed and won't listen to us.

I can't seem to get over Kotetsu and Izumo, but it all washes away when Sasuke places a hand on my shoulder. I didn't even know my shoulders were tense until I let them relax under him.

"Why are you two here?" Once she done asking, she takes her place behind the desk. Since I don't completely trust myself, I let Sasuke explain what happened.

"As part of our last Trial, Naruto had to give me a drug. It redirected my chakra flow and caused nightmarish hallucinations if I didn't take it. They wanted to use it to keep me under control. Naruto and I wanted to know if you knew anything about their plans regarding us," Tsunade listens closely, sitting back in her chair as Sasuke speaks.

"You have to understand, I avoid them whenever possible."

"Don't you think that it's your duty as the current Hokage to protect the next one?" I might as well not even be in the room right now, they're too busy staring each other down.

"Last time I checked, you didn't seem so interested in staying here. If Naruto is 'the next one', as you say, that would mean you're planning on staying," Right, we figured she would ask something like that.

"I decided that it seemed logical for me to stay here, given my new goal."

"And what would that goal be?"

Sasuke doesn't answer quickly, and he sighs before he starts.

"I wish to live as myself, as Uchiha Sasuke. It's a simple goal, but I need help from an expert to accomplish it," I like the sound of his goal, but what expert is he talking about?

"Who is this expert?" Tsunade has always been curious about things, like me.

"It's Naruto. In the same setting, he had to first distinguish himself from the Kyuubi, and then prove it to the villagers. They were all scared of him, and they came to adore him. They're afraid again, but it's only temporary. So, with him, I can learn how to live with who I am and what I was. If that means staying here, then that's what I have to do. I'm staying for selfish reasons."

"Yeah, right. Sounds good. First, prove to me that you aren't just manipulating him with your Eternal Mangekyou."

"It's true that it has that capability, but I haven't done it to Naruto. Call for one of the Yamanakas and get a few specialists in genjutsu detection. We'll prove it," Sasuke's always calm and composed, so he easily figures out a way to prove that I'm not being manipulated.

Hey, wait a minute! That's my plan! Asshole...

"Alright, I'll tell Shizune to get them," A few minutes after she gives the order, Yamanaka Ino and Hyuuga Neji walk in and both bow politely to the Hokage before staring at us.

"Sasuke-kun, it's been a while," Ino smiles awkwardly, making it pretty damn obvious she's heard the rumors just like everyone else. Neji is more relaxed than her, which is great. He's always been on my side, that guy.

"Ino, Hyuuga," Sasuke addresses them with a nod, "I'm certain you've heard of the rumors. We can't disprove all of them right now, but we have a place to start. We need you two to search Naruto for any signs of being manipulated or being under a genjutsu. Take him into a different room and ask him some questions," He gestures to me, and I stand up.

"We'll make a report of our findings for you, Hokage-sama," Neji bows again, and then looks at me. Understanding the look, I follow him and Ino to an nearby conference room. We get situated, and I wait for them to start.

"Naruto, we're going to have Neji look at your chakra to start. If you're under any genjutsu, it should show up in your chakra. After that, I'll look into your mind to see if there has been any alterations or signs of manipulation. Is that okay?" Ino has been very sweet to me since the end of the war, and I trust Neji completely, so I nod in agreement.

"Byakugan!" The veins around Neji's eyes show up, so I know he's looking at me. His scan of my chakra only takes a few moments.

"There's nothing, his chakra is normal. Your turn, Ino. I'm going to start the report while you're working," Neji goes to do that, and Ino sits in front of me. She makes her hand seal and directs it at my face.

"Shintenshin no jutsu!" I've never had this done to me, so it's the weirdest feeling to lose all control of my body.

"I can hear you, Naruto. Let me just take a look through here. I'll let you come along," Inos voice comes from nowhere, but soon we materialize in what must be my mind. It's similar to the white space that Sasuke and I go into, but this time it's darker.

"Welcome to your mind, Naruto!" She giggles a little, looking around at the meteorite-looking things. She catches me looking at them.

"They're neurons. Aren't they pretty?"

"Oh, weird," I take one last look around, "So, what are you going to do?"

"I'll just take a look into your memories regarding Sasuke. Simple! If I run into anything that suggests he manipulated you, or you two were plotting this from the start, I'll find it. And, also..." She trails off, blushing. I can't stop her in time, she's already bringing up my memories. They appear like a large, fuzzy picture. It's curved, as though it's being projected on the inside of a dome. Well, we are in my skull, I guess!

"Let's start when you're kids, since some people say you started plotting back then," In a moment, she's scanning through my memories of being mistreated by the villagers. She hears fragments of my thoughts of revenge. She sees the first time I meet Sasuke, and all the thoughts I have about him. My jealousy, my admiration, she brings all of it up. I recognize some scenes, like when Sasuke "died" in my arms, and when we were training together. His encounter with Itachi and our fight on the hospital roof appeared, too. Once those memories started showing, I know she's going to see Sasuke's descent.

The memory of our fight at the Valley of the End is clear, like it happened yesterday. She gets to view every moment and hear every word that Sasuke said to me. Back then, I thought of why I was so attached to Sasuke. When she stops, she has to wipe tears off before looking at me.

"Wow," she chokes out.

"Yeah, I know."

"I had no idea. To be honest, I was always jealous of how you always had Sasuke's attention. After seeing this...how could I have been so selfish?"

"Sakura was the same way. I get where you girls were coming from, if that helps at all," I smile a bit, even though I'm shaken by having all those thoughts dragged up. I know some of the nature of the jutsu, and I think it makes her feel what I felt in those memories. If that's true, she just went through a lifetime of suffering.

"We still have some memories to go through. Sasuke-kun's Eternal Mangekyou might have done something to you, so I need to check more recent memories."

"Go ahead," Maybe I should've thought about what my recent memories were before I let her drag them up.

"Wh-what?" Ino's in shock as she sees all of the times I was teasing Sasuke. She spent a good amount of time lingering on the time I bit Sasuke, replaying the parts where he made sounds over and over again.

"He's moaning! That's Sasuke moaning! Oh my gosh, I never though I'd ever hear it!" She was blushing furiously, but she started bouncing excitedly. She replayed it again, experiencing the sensations I felt back then.

"If that's gotten you so excited, you could keep going,"

"No, you guys didn't! Really!"

"Do what?" She doesn't listen to me, she's too busy scanning through our memories to find whatever she's looking for. The next memory that gets replayed multiple times is the kiss.

"How sweet! It's like a movie, you just swept him up like that!" Damn it, why does she have to squeal so loud when she's in my head? I'm going to have a head ache for weeks!

I get hit for that thought, though I wonder if it affects my body or my head. Great, an even worse head ache!

"Nothing in here seems to suggest that he's controlling you. And this disproves those theories about him using sex, since you do haven't done anything like that yet."

"Yeah...wait, yet!"

"I'll be giving your mind back now! I hope you have better luck getting Sasuke than us girls!"

"Ino, wait up!"

She makes the hand seal again and releases herself from my mind. I'm so dizzy I could puke, but I make a fast recovery, like always.

"So, Naruto, what should I put in my report? Everything?" Ino giggles. She's going to tell Sakura everything, I just know it, but I don't need Tsunade hearing about all that!

"Just sum it up by saying that I wasn't manipulated and he never used any other tactics to control me. Don't you dare tell Tsunade those things!" I try to glare at her, but she waves a hand and continues laughing as Neji comes back with his report.

"Naruto, the Hokage wants to see you if you're done."

"I thought you were going to ask questions?" I'd really rather not answer any of them, but this has to be thorough.

"Fine. Are you being manipulated by Sasuke?"

"No."

"Has he ever put you under a genjutsu?"

"No."

"Are you two in a relationship?"

"Neji!" Even he's asking!

"You wanted to be asked questions, Naruto. I wanted to cover all of the rumors with them. I heard about your encounter with Hinata, so even I believed that last rumor to be true."

"Oh, come on! What about Rock Lee, he doesn't seem the type to believe things like that!"

"On the contrary, he rambled for an hour about how it's 'beautiful that the blossom of youthful love can bloom between two men'. He's also concerned about how Sakura is taking the news of Sasuke's orientation," Figures, what else could I expect from Bushy Brow?

"So, every damn one of you guys thinks Sasuke and I are gay?"

"Yup!" Ino chirps out, and I slap a palm over my face and sigh.

"I'll be going now," I growl at them and storm over to Tsunade's office.

"You don't look pleased. What did you find out?" For how pissed I am, I probably look like I found out that Sasuke has been manipulating me, so I'm quick to calm down.

"You'll get the report. I'm clear of any signs of genjutsu and manipulation, I can tell you that," I sit down next to Sasuke, who was furrowing his brow until a few seconds ago. Did I worry him?

"With that out of the way, we should discuss your next Trial," Tsunade waves to get our attention. Sasuke's much quicker at answering than I am.

"We're getting it from you?"

"I didn't get any word from the the old asses about your next Trial, so I'm going to give you one. Since we're on the subject of these theories, I'd like you to go see a few who believe the more serious accusations."

"Like Kotetsu and Izumo?" I growl and sink down in my seat, wanting to run out of the room and kick their asses for believing such bullshit.

"No, these people are much, much worse. They meet every other night to discuss escape plans and revolution strategies, should you get in office. It's a group of about thirty men and twenty women, some ninjas, some civilians. It's a mixed bag in there, the spy reports say that they've seen high-ranking ANBU members leading it occasionally."

"You want us to walk straight into a place full of villagers who think we're out to destroy everything? I might be able to do good speeches on the fly, Baa-chan, but how the hell do you expect me to talk to a mob?"

"The last time he tried, I had to use Tsukiyomi," Sasuke chips in, since he's not too pleased about the idea, either.

"What would our objective be, anyway? We can't attack them, and we can't convince them that we're harmless!"

"They won't be dumb enough to attack you two. They're in this group because they fear how powerful you two are. To them, attacking you would mean instant death," Tsunade calmly explains something that I find completely horrifying as if it's no big deal.

"More importantly, he asked about the objective," he's not as concerned about the people as I am, the bastard.

"Right. I'll let this be a simple one. Walk in there, see what happens. If you come back tomorrow to report, which means showing your face in broad daylight to these people, I'll believe that you can handle having these rumors surrounding you. To be honest, there's a chance they might drive you away from Konoha and you'll never come back."

"It's a deal! They didn't drive me out before, they can't do it now!" I hop up and make a fist, showing how prepared I am for these people. Sasuke slides his chair back and stands up fluidly. It's like he's trying to make up for how spontaneous I am by moving as gracefully as possible.

"We'll come in tomorrow at noon to report," He's confident, too, since he's making us come through Konoha at its busiest time.

"Before I forget, the name of the group is the Dragon Knights."

"Man, that's kick ass! Yet lame," What? If ninjas could be called Dragon Knights, I'd probably wear that title with even more pride.

"Isn't this the Dragon Trial?"

"Good observation, Sasuke," Tsunade nods, "That's the point I was going to make to the elders to justify giving you a different Trial."

"Cool! Thanks, Tsunade! See you tomorrow!" I wave goodbye and take Sasuke out through the windows since I don't want to pass by Izumo and Kotetsu again. Once outside, we both realize that we don't know where they're meeting. It's getting dark fast, so they're going to be meeting soon.

"I'm not thrilled about going in front of a bunch of people who hate us."

"Me neither, teme," I sigh, watching the sunset's colors turn all of Konoha my favorite color, orange. Seeing Konoha in a different light brings up something that Sasuke said recently.

"So, you're staying?"

"It's the logical choice, dobe," He turns his face from me, so I decide he's due for a teasing. I grab on to his waist and pull him up. There's not much space on this roof, but I manage to spin around with Sasuke in my arms. He's stringing curses together and holding on to my neck like I'm going to fling him off the roof. Once I've had enough, I put him down and smile at him. I don't bother to move my arms at all.

"Do you have to be stupid all the time?" He yells at me, but I'm not fazed.

"Now, Sasuke, why would you choose to get help from an 'expert' that you think is stupid?" I chuckle, watching his lips press together. I slide a hand up his back and into his hair.

"You're the one that said it," My head tilts a bit to the side, since I'm playing with him. The next time he looks at me, his eyes widen while his eyebrows fly up. His entire body tenses and stills like he's hiding from a bear. My teasing must be working pretty well!

"Thank you for that, Sasuke. I've always had a big head, but you've made it even bigger," Okay, did I say something, because he's never turned red that fast before.

"Let. Go," He forces a whisper out somehow, even though his lips don't move. How is this going too far, I've done way worse! I just have a hand on his back, one in his spiky hair, and my head is tilted.

If I just lean in a centimeter, I'd be kissing him. Which would mean...

No wonder he's freaking! I back a good meter away from him and scratch the back of my head. It takes a few coughs, but Sasuke manages to compose himself.

"We should find out where they're meeting. Let's transform into ANBU, we can get in that way without causing a problem," He doesn't usually speak so quickly, but I know I'm not in any better shape.

"Yeah, that way we can eavesdrop on some crowds and watch them to see where they go," Without much preparation, Sasuke and I transform into masked ANBU. Our choices of masks are obvious; my mask is of a fox with red swirls, and Sasuke's is a hawk's with blue markings.

"Naruto, I doubt they'd be very welcoming to someone wearing the demon they're so afraid of. Choose a different mask," He has a point, but I get a bit huffy.

"What, should I be a llama instead? I don't know any other animals I like!"

"Make it a dragon, dobe, not a llama," It's more complicated than a fox, but I manage to make a convincing dragon mask with green markings.

"Better?" I relax when I he nods. Preparing for what we're about to run into, we wait until it's dark before jumping into the main line of shops. We had assumed that it was going to be hard to find someone mentioning the meetings, but it turns out that Sasuke and I are a hot topic.

"So, what's being discussed at the meeting tonight?" Some old toy seller guy is chatting with one of his customers as if they're talking about the weather!

"We're running some drills, like what to do if the Uchiha uses Amaterasu on you, or if Naruto has one of your children. Things like that," What is this bullshit?

"Perfect. We just have to follow these two and they'll take us to the meeting tonight," Sasuke whispers to me discreetly while assholes all around us openly talk about how much they hate us. It's a good thing they start moving towards where they're meeting, or else I might just give them a taste of what they're so worried about!

"Whatever they say, keep calm. I doubt Tsunade wants to hear in our report that we caused a scene and attacked civilians," his words are soothing, to be honest. It's something about his tone that brings me back to focus. The two men walk into a familiar building, though it's not until I see the sign that I know where we are.

"The Paper Bag, are you kidding me? This place again?"

"Just shut up and follow my lead," Sasuke takes a couple more steps towards the door.

"Hiro-san, about that Uchiha brat's Mangekyou, is it true that you wouldn't even know you're being controlled by it?" Oh, I see what he's doing. But Hiro, really?

"I haven't heard much about his powers, Tanaka-san. I'm just worried about being torn apart by that demon kid!" The conversations around us echo our stupid-sounding "concerns."

"This meeting of the Dragon Knights has now begun! First to the podium will be, uh, Sweetie!" Where have I heard that name before? It doesn't take too long to see the woman who owns this pub stand behind the crude podium in the corner of the room. Everyone else has taken their seats at the tables, though most have to stand against the wall.

"Alright, alright, listen up y'all! I said shut the hell up!" She croons out, smacking one of her fat-ass fists on the podium, "I know they said this here'll be a meetin' for drills, but I got some words to say!"

No way, she couldn't be standing up for us, could she?

"As hot as that Uchiha might be, he's an asshole! A big, ol' cocksucker, he is!" I see she didn't like being turned down by Sasuke. Yeesh.

"And the cock he's suckin' is that Naruto boy!" What a charming lady, too bad she's a bitch.

"They should both go to Hell!"

"Yeah, they should start by getting the fuck out of Konoha!" Every jeer brings another wave of shouted agreements. They just keep coming! I thought these meetings were supposed to be about something productive.

"Hey!" I jump up and yell over all of them. "Let me behind that podium!" The whole room of people stops and looks over to me.

"Yeah, what makes you so qualified?" Sweetie growls out, and I release my transformation.

"I think I have a couple things to say that you want to hear," Without stopping, I pull Sasuke up with me and stand at the podium. The screams are a mixture of genuine fear, curses, and threats. When Sasuke transforms back, his spinning eyes catch all of their attention. Catching themselves, they all look down to avoid being caught in a genjutsu.

"As you all know, I'm trying to become Hokage. Sasuke and I are going through Trials to prove that we're good for the job," It's a start, but I don't know where I'm going with this.

"We don't want you, demon boy!" The voice comes from a young woman, one that I don't know at all.

"Okay, about the demon. I've worked through a lot of issues with him, and he's actually starting to warm up to me. Point is, he's not a threat to you. Notice I said he, since Kyuubi isn't me. Your Hokage is going to be me, not Kyuubi. There's a difference, and you all know that! You all believed it after I fought Pein!"

"You were just pretending to be our hero so you would be nicely set up to destroy everyone!"

"That theory is one that I can only disprove after a couple years in office," I'm struggling here, and they can sense it. Mobs tend to sense uncertainty pretty damn quickly.

"By then, you could've already taken out all five of the Great Nations!"

"Face it, we don't want you in office!" They begin their rallying cries again. I don't notice how pissed off Sasuke's become until the podium explodes into pieces from the force of his fist. That shuts the mob up.

"What you idiots don't seem to understand is that there are even more powerful ninjas out there than us! Ones that actually want to kill all of you! If you don't have Naruto to protect you from them, then who the hell do you have? All of your ANBU and other ninjas have proven to be incompetent or easily manipulated from the shadows, and you want to drive away someone who's been devoted to you ungrateful morons this whole time? Despite the fact that he's suffered through your ignorance all his life, he's still fighting for your side! He's the only reason you still have a village anymore, the only reason I didn't kill all of you myself! Don't you dare make me regret that I didn't."

I'm speechless. Their speechless. But Sasuke, he's still fuming.

"Naruto, this was all we had to do, right? We've done the Trial. I want out of this village. Now."

"Carry on," I kick some of the pieces of the podium aside for emphasis before walking out of the Paper Bag. Without any exchange, Sasuke and I go to spend the night at our room at the inn.

We'll decide in the morning if we have a reason to go back.

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><p>Alright, you read it?<p>

You sure?

Then tell me what you think! Don't be a ninja reader who goes through this whole story without saying anything! You get cyber popcorn, remember! *~*~*


	8. Snake Trial: Recognition

So, I have a few reasons for this being so late, but I feel horrible anyway. Seriously, this is even a shorter chapter and I've had it thought out for a while! But noooo, my brain just didn't want to work. I couldn't even crank out my minimum, man! School's coming up this Monday, so I had to finish reading the Scarlet Letter and I have to write two essays for it. Fuuuu internet didn't work yesterday either X-X

My girlfriend also yelled at me for not giving cyber popcorn, sooo here *~*~*~* Yum, right?

Alright, I need lots of reviews to get through the first week of my Junior year, come on~

Might as well put a warning and disclaimer: I don't own Naruto/anything in it. **Also, this isn't the best chapter for weak stomachs, in my opinion. You'll miss a couple plot points, but they'll be brought up again in the next chapter, if you feel like skipping**. **I mean there's some gore. Just sayin'.** Please don't though, it was hard as hell to get this chapter out XP

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><p><em> Trial 7: Recognition<em>

"You idiot, is the bookstore even open this early?"

I'm only talking to the crumpled note he left me, since he managed to slip out of the inn without me knowing. The bookstore, that's the one place I would never expect to see the dobe walk into. With that said, it sounds like a blatant lie.

Is he trying to run away? If he didn't want to go back to Konoha, he should've told me instead of taking off himself! Where does that leave me?

The moment I can be seen in public, I'm walking the shopping district to find this bookstore. I'm not having much luck, this seems to be a town full of gift shops and convenience stores. Turning a few more corners and pushing through the mass of tourists, my search finally ends.

"Mind your own business, asshole! I'll read whatever the hell I want! I bet you got a huge stash of these at home! Why the fuck do you sell them if you judge the people who buy them, huh?" That would be Naruto, for certain, though I can't see through the crowd too well.

"You're the one who was yelling in my store, actin' all defensive! Don't come back here, you dumb ass!" Naruto, do you have to anger every burly store owner we encounter?

"You know, you're lucky I didn't just steal these like I used to!" The moment I can see some orange, Naruto comes bashing into me. In doing so, he drops his paper bag. He doesn't want to give me the opportunity to see what they are, but my Sharingan is too fast for them. I only caught the name, and it doesn't ring a bell. "Out Magazine"? Knowing Naruto, it's some grotesque magazine, like the ones Kakashi used to show to me when he wanted to read his book in peace.

"When I read "bookstore", I thought you were joking. If you were going to run out to buy something like that, why did you tell me?" He can't seem to form words, and there's way too many people pushing past us, so I drag him into a nearby, empty alley.

"S-Sasuke, I can explain, these are-"

"No, don't. Spare me," I nearly lean back against the grimy alley walls, but I catch myself in time. There's the sickly-sweet smell of rotting garbage coming from a nearby dumpster, also, so I lead us out of the alleyway. Once I figure out what street we're on, I head towards the inn.

"So, tell me, Sasuke, are we going to pack up our stuff and make a run for it, or are we going back to Konoha?" After all of his obnoxious speeches about how I should stay in Konoha, he's giving me the choice to have us leave it behind forever?

"Are you saying you don't want to go back, dobe?"

"No, I'm just seeing this as our one and only time to make that choice. I want you to go back to Konoha with me, but I'm also okay with the idea of running away with you. It might be fun to start over where nobody knows us. Maybe I'll become a ramen chef, you never know!"

"I have one other choice, Naruto. I could just run away from everything, including you. But, as I said before, that doesn't seem logical. Neither does running away, frankly. We're just going to the inn to pick up my katana and your weapons, then we're going to the village."

He laughs, and tries to put his arm around my shoulders. I shrug out of it after a moment, though normally I wouldn't let it happen for any length of time. However, in this case, I'm worried about rejecting him too often. It's better to allow these little touches than to let it escalate into something I can't handle.

"Fine, fine, let's go!" he pushes me aside playfully, but he stays relatively calm as we gather our weapons and head to Konoha.

Naruto's trying to hide it, but I know he's scared.

As if the entire village was alerted of our arrival, the main street is teeming with onlookers. They've set themselves up along the sides of the road, leaving a clear path in the middle, like we're a two-man parade. I'm waiting for Naruto to make the first move down the ramp, but he stares down at the villagers intently instead of moving towards them.

"Naruto?" Good, that breaks him out of his trance, but now his eyes are locked on me instead of the crowd.

"You know, you have a katana and your Mangekyou displayed to everyone," Ridiculous, if I wanted to flaunt my strength, I'd come in on my hawk summon at the very least.

"Your point being?"

"These people are afraid of how strong we are, but why shouldn't we be proud of it? The Hokage has to be the strongest in the village, someone who can protect them from anything. You're showing your strength, so I'll show mine," In what seems like no time at all, Naruto begins glowing and red marks appear around his eyes. From the looks of it, he's combining his Sage Mode and his Nine-Tails Mode together. To do that, he'd have to balance Kyuubi's chakra, Natural energy, and his own chakra perfectly.

"If even I'm impressed, everyone's going to be awestruck," Normally, he'd grin like an idiot at the compliment, but he can only pull off an awkward smile.

"You'll have to do better than that to make it, Naruto,"

Glancing over the small, fresh village once more, he breathes in and exhales slowly, calming his nerves. He turns his face up towards the weakening autumn sun, but I stay turned to him. Naruto, with his orange cloak of light, resembles a much stronger sun, one that's rising from the east side of this village, basking it in his optimistic light.

By now, Naruto's name can be used interchangeably with hope and strength, so why can't they see it? How can these people still be living with their heads up their asses after all this time, after everything he's done to prove himself? If they can't see it, then it needs to be shown to them directly.

"What's the worst that can happen, right?"

I feel my right hand being squeezed by him, but then he lets go and stands up straight. Walking as proudly as we can, which is something that comes natural to me, Naruto and I face the gauntlet. Whether it be out of fear or reverence, the throngs of people are silent. With his glowing body and my spinning Sharingan, they have no choice but to be awestruck. They press against the buildings to get away from us, but their eyes are on us the entire way.

Naruto doesn't relax or even breath a sigh of relief even though we've made it into the Hokage tower. However, he does stop both of his modes, so I stop my Sharingan from spinning. Without bothering to acknowledge any of the guards, he and I open the double doors together and stand in front of Tsunade's desk.

"Welcome back, you two. How was the meeting?" Smirking at us, the Hokage greets us as though she didn't expect anything different. She leans forward to start speaking about something else, and I'm forced to see her ridiculously large chest. You would think that, in her position, she would find more decent clothing, especially since she's a ninja!

It's not a subject I ever dwell upon, so I shift my weight towards Naruto and let him speak for us.

"The old crone who owns the Paper Bag was yelling about Sasuke since he 'rejected' her. I stood up and said a few things, then teme over here jumped in and stole the show!" Dobe needs to keep his mouth shut, he just made her direct her smirk at me.

"Why am I not surprised?" She sifts through a few of her papers before she finds what she was looking for, "Congratulations on passing your sixth Trial. After this next one, you'll be more than halfway there. You're both doing well, but you might have noticed that these Trials seem related."

"Hey, yeah! Everything seems to point back to that Lady Chance. What's going on?" Our curiosities are piqued, but I can keep myself a lot more composed than the dolt.

"She's important, yes, but she's a victim. It's her brother who caught the eyes of the elders," I'm more comfortable knowing what we're after. All of our previous missions felt like we were running blind for their amusement.

"Her brother? What's his significance?" Right, I suppose that's more important than dwelling on past Trials.

"Sasuke should be familiar with this subject," I raise an eyebrow in recognition, "Since he's involved with Orochimaru."

Orochimaru? I'm not pleased to hear about him, but just the name tenses Naruto up. I don't understand, I left the village and I'm the one who nearly killed him, but he still blames Orochimaru for what happened instead of me. Even if he doesn't want to see it this way, I'll always have to live with the fact that I left and hurt Naruto to go train under the snake Sennin on my own volition. Maybe, one day, I'll tell him that I made the plan to kill Orochimaru because of him. I had never expected Naruto to show up three years later, still chasing after me instead of training to become Hokage.

I've asked him before, but I never really knew why he cared about me so fucking much. Like a friend, like a brother, his important person, I've heard it all. Why does it never make sense?

"Sasuke?" Tsunade breaks me out of my thoughts harshly.

"Hn?"

"Have you ever heard anyone mention Kashiwa Kuroni?" Kashiwa again, the high class group of that Tree-obsessed village?

"I knew a Kuroni," I toss the name around my mind for a moment, and I manage to call up a memory, "That guy, he was one of the medics I hated. He was always trying to convince Orochimaru to raise an Uchiha clone army by using my DNA and...other things," As if that was ever going to happen, "Orochimaru nearly accepted once, so I used a non-lethal Chidori on Kuroni. That's all I remember of him, I don't even know what hide out he'd be in."

"Well, that's not the first time we've heard about his interest in cloning. We intercepted Lady Chance, and she gave us some vital information. Apparently, Kuroni has created a surgically-altered army and a partial clone," Surgically-altered? When it comes to Orochimaru's men, that never is a good thing.

"Seriously? A clone! I didn't even know that was possible! Did he clone himself?" I have to remember to tell this idiot that he watches too many movies.

"Shut up and listen!" She glares at Naruto, but he has developed an immunity against any glare but my own, I'm sure of it.

"Fine, fine, then who?"

"You! You've been cloned and the other people have been altered to look like you!"

Either this Kuroni guy is an idiot, or he gets some enjoyment from fucking with the wrong people. I'm assuming both.

"Holy shit, why me?"

"We don't know that yet, Naruto. That's what you two are going to find out. However, that's only one part of your mission," It's my turn to answer, since I want to get out there and find this guy as soon as possible.

"Fine, what's the other part? Kill him?" I hope so.

"That's not necessary, though apprehending him would be a great bonus. No, your main objective is another collection mission. It's a touchy idea, so I'll leave it up to you. Either you kill the Naruto clone, or you bring it back here."

"Doesn't sound that complicated. There's no way the clone has his abilities," It's not going to settle well with either of us, but who knows how messed up this clone will be? We'll put it out of it's misery just so it can avoid being here in Konoha. We can kill him with a clear conscience then.

"I'm certain he wouldn't be a difficult kill, Sasuke. According to Lady Chance, who was the surrogate, he's only fifteen months old."

A baby.

A fucking baby?

"We'll...we'll see what kind of shape it's in, and decide what we'll do then," His voice is shaky and he's breaking out in a cold sweat, but Naruto manages to think more calmly about it than I can. It is his clone, after all.

"Sasuke, the hideout he's in is protected by three tribe villages. Do you know which one that is?"

"Yeah, that's one of the few in Konoha. I remember how to get there."

"Good," Her serious air softens once she looks at the distress on Naruto's face, "If I were you two, I wouldn't wait too long to get there. It's not something you should think about for too long. Do what you're best at, Naruto, and go with your gut instincts. Prepare yourselves...physically and mentally."

Naruto and I nod together, and we both wait to be dismissed. When she does, I follow Naruto to the Hokage Mountain again. It's calming for him, it seems, but I doubt it'll work for this.

"She's right. I wish I could stop fucking thinking about it."

"It's one of Orochimaru's subordinates, too. It's much worse than it sounds. I'm not looking forward to cutting down your look-alikes."

Naruto lets out a bark of laughter before flopping onto a patch of grass. We both stare up at the sky in silence.

Nearly an hour later, we're ready to go. As ready as possible, that is.

"These trees look familiar. It's around here, about a kilometer ahead of us," My memory is good. Too good, sometimes, but it's a necessary evil.

"Sheesh, I swear I can feel Orochimaru's mark on this place," I, as a reflex to being around Orochimaru's territory, stiffen and focus all of my senses to my surroundings.

"Naruto, if we draw any attention to ourselves, Kuroni might have the time to escape with the clone. We should try blending in."

"Again? I feel like we're becoming masters of disguises, Sasuke!"

"You're a new sort of stupid, aren't you? Our enemies all look like you, those poor people, so you already blend in."

"Hey, I caught that!"

"Shut up. You're a ninja, act like one!"

"But I'm not good at that," Naruto mock-whines at me. His antics manage to clear away some of the cold atmosphere, but I have a feeling it won't help once we go inside.

In a puff of smoke, I henge into a perfect copy of Naruto. I still can't grasp how we're ninjas trying to blend in, and yet we're wearing orange.

"Man, Sasuke, you're too good at this. It's downright uncanny!" He inspects my henge, but must not have found any error with it.

"Stop messing around. We should go."

After running the final kilometer, we find the steps leading down into the hideout. The unguarded entrance is overgrown with weeds and ivy, but I can make out the large door at the bottom. It's never wise to go through the front door on a mission, but it's our only option.

The door has been used recently, most likely for supplies, so it's not difficult to open it enough for us to slip in.

"Okay. We could either check the labs or the medical wing for the clone. We're more likely to run into Kuroni if we check the labs first."

"Then we should go to the medical wing. We can't have him knowing we're here before we find the baby," Alright, he's getting serious. If he doesn't lose that, we'll make it out of here relatively unscathed.

"Then follow me, but be quiet."

I lead him through three of the hallways leading to the east wing before we encounter some Naruto look alikes. They're all in the dark, but I can make out the bright orange clothes.

One turns around and comes into the light, and Naruto barely stifles a scream. It's...what the hell kind of monster would make this? It, this thing, was it a woman? It's crude, patch-work jacket reveals her scarred chest from the botched removal of her breasts. That isn't nearly as horrifying as her face, and I can barely stand to describe it in my mind. Her nose is sliced down the center, the left side being a unnaturally tan prosthetic. The other side is dripping a long string of bloody mucus. The eyelids, stitched and scarred, are opened wide to reveal two glass eyes that don't match each other. One is a glazed looking blue, and the other is electric.

Another of the group staggers beside her. For a moment, I thought he was smiling, but no. His lips were taken off and the corners of his mouth were sliced unevenly wider. His hair is bleached nearly white, which must be why there's patches of it missing. Somebody used a black marker to draw thick eyebrows near his thinning hair line. This one is more of a ringer for Rock Lee than Naruto. Right? Oh fuck, this is insane.

Without thinking much about it, I drag Naruto back a couple hallways and collapse with him on the ground. Once he's able to move, he lifts himself enough to puke on the floor. Once he does so, I realize that he's not the only one who's gotten sick here. There's all types of substances on the ground we just fell on, and I stand up in shock when I see a rotting finger lying an inch from my face.

"Naruto, Naruto come on. The sooner we do this, the sooner we can get out."

"Ye..yeah," He pulls himself up, knees shaking like a newborn, "Oh Fuckin A. Shit!"

"I know,"

"No, there's literally shit on the floor. This is too much!" He's starting to panic, I can tell, so I put my hands on his shoulders and touch my forehead to his so I'm the only thing he can see.

"Pull it together, Uzumaki. Once we deal with the crazy asshole who did this, we'll help all of these people or put them out of their misery," He breaths in as I speak, and I realize I'm doing the same. Surrounded by such a strong stench, his scent is a comforting respite.

"If they're that bad, what about the baby?"

"We can't think of that right now, Naruto. If we don't take this step by step, we'll get overwhelmed. I've seen some of Orochimaru's worst experiments, but none of them reached this level. We have to end this!"

"Okay...alright," He hugs me to him, and I can feel how badly he's shaking. My breath comes easier when I hold on to him as tightly as possible, so we stay there without being seen for as long as possible.

Or at least, we thought we weren't seen.

"Oh, hello, boys! I'm sorry for the mess, the family is full of a bunch of pigs, right? They really take after you, don't you think, Naruto-kun?" That high-pitched voice, it's him. But where is his voice coming from? Naruto and I jump back to back with my katana and his kunai at the ready.

"Don't be so jumpy, Sasuke-kun. It's just an intercom, silly! Now the aliens aren't the only one speaking from the walls, ha! I'm just as strong as those muffin-eating bastards!"

"What the hell are you talking about?" Naruto yells out right before I get out my own thoughts.

"What kind of sick plan is this, Kuroni! What have you done to these people? They're like zombies!"

"Don't insult them! They'll be offended, and we don't want that, do we? No, how about you instead use your words to tell me what you're doing in my house? Are you working for the woodpeckers? Those devils have been digging their way into here with their lasers, I just know they want to peck into my brain!"

"We're here to kill you, you fucking bastard!" I jump in before Naruto can say anything. He may not be that stupid, but I can't risk him saying anything about the baby. If we throw this guy off our track, we might be able to get it.

"You, and all of your army! You should give yourself up, Kuroni! There's no way a scientist is any match for Sasuke and the future Hokage!" Naruto got my point, good.

"Oh, I'm sure you'll just be delighted with the gifts I have for you, Naruto-kun! Nothing but the best for you, holy embodiment of the second coming!" Is that more of his weird nonsense? He wasn't nearly this strange three years ago.

"What second coming?" Naruto yells, but the answer comes from around the corner.

"The second coming of Lord Orochimaru, of course! Almighty savior, genius! The one true Divine!"

"Hate to break it to you, Kuroni, but it would be the third coming. The second was when my brother sealed him. There's no way he's coming back from that!"

Naruto takes the chance while I'm talking to see what's around the corner. He motions that the coast is clear, so I go to see what it is. It's just another intercom, one with a glowing red light around it. Because of it, the whole hallway is bathed in an eerie red light.

"Fuck off, Uchiha!" Suddenly, Kuroni's voice takes a gruff edge, "How about you join my family for dinner!" With a loud cackle, the intercom turns off and we're plunged into darkness. Instinctively, I grab on to Naruto's arm to keep track of him and use my other hand to grope for the wall.

Last time I checked, walls weren't warm and slimy. Before I'm aware of it, I'm slashing blindly with my katana and hitting something human every time.

"Fuck! Fuck! FUCK!" Naruto's pulling on me as he attacks his side of living zombies. With every slash, I hear guts and body parts splattering onto the floor, but I can't see them. The floor is slick with what I hope is only blood, so I try to keep Naruto from moving too far. Wave after wave we fight, but Naruto gets out of shock enough to have an idea.

Soon, the room is lit by Naruto's Kyuubi mode.

I really wish it wasn't. Screams tear from our throats as we look at the mutilated people climbing over the mounds of bodies and blood.

"Duck!" I avoid his large chakra arms just in time. He uses them to push everything as far away from us as possible.

"Kage Bunshin, Oodama Rasengan!" Naruto uses clones to build up a large Rasengan, which he sends into the hallway wall. The room it opens into is also full of these hideous people, so I do what comes naturally.

"Amaterasu!" The black flames engulf the whole room as the blood drips from my eye. Once they've all turned to ash, I stop the fire. It takes a lot out of me, but not nearly as much as before I got the Eternal Mangekyou.

"How dare you ruin my house! I guess I should be thanking you, though. That wall was an asshole to me! It sounded like my father, don't you know. Have you met him? Nope! He's dead!" It takes everything I have to ignore him and focus on where we are. I grab on to Naruto so we can run through the last few halls, using fire balls, Rasengans, and any force needed to get the the medical wing.

"It better be here. The labs are on the other side of the hideout!" I can hardly recognize my voice, it's so strained and rushed.

"Right, fine!" He yells, and starts bursting through doors to try to find this clone.

"Hey, hey, hey! What're you doing in there? This isn't a theme park, you know. If it was, my ant rollercoaster would've been much more successful! Then again, the ride to death should be much more fun for you!" A loud alarm sounds, and a green gas starts pouring through grates in the ceiling and floors. We hold our breaths to search, but it brings tears to our eyes.

"Ra...sen...shuriken!" Naruto, holding his wind chakra and spinning Rasengan, clears the room of the gas and sends it into the ceiling. The moonlight streams in from the outside.

"Now, come on, what if it rains? Or worse, what if the woodpeckers find it?"

"I can't understand a damn thing he's saying!" Naruto yells out to me as he checks a room down the hall.

"He sounds like he's on that chakra drug,"

"CHAKRA DRUG? That beautiful stuff, it's been gone! Poof! Out of me, out of here, I haven't seen the lovely drug since dear Orochimaru departed temporarily from this world!"

"Permanent withdrawl symptoms?" It's just a guess, but intuition tells me that Naruto is correct. This man has permanent damage done to him because of whatever drug Orochimaru gave him. That explains why he thinks these zombies look anything like Naruto.

"Keep searching, Sasuke!"

I check down another hallway. Instead of the usual look-alikes, this hall is filled with an even worse sort. They're all kids, every one of them, but they've gone through surgeries as terrible as the adults. Many of them are missing limbs, eyes, and teeth. Some don't even have their jaw anymore, and there's charred flesh where he must have attempted to cauterize it. There are little bodies strewn on the floor, and those were the lucky ones.

If there's going to be a clone child anywhere, it should be around here. But first...

"Tsukiyomi," To lessen the pain, I send them all into a peaceful, happy dreamland, then go to work. Their deaths are swift and painless, much better than what they were going through.

"Sasuke?" Naruto stands still at the beginning of this hall, and I lay the last child onto the floor. I dust myself off and stand up as straight as I can at the moment.

"You're crying, Sasuke-"

"The littles ones! Why did you do that to my little ones, Sasuke-kun! You know, they could've been your little ones, if you would've just let me use you! All I needed was your spunk, your spew, your happy baby juice, and I would've had the strongest little ones!"

"I hope you rot in hell, you bastard!" Naruto screams back at him. With a new burst of energy, Naruto sprints and checks all of the doors in this hallway while I just gawk at him.

"Is...is this him?" He disappears into the last room he opened, and comes out with a little bundle in his arms.

"Has he gone through any surgeries?" After all we've seen, I'm afraid to look.

"No, that's why I think it's him."

"YOU BASTARDS, THAT'S MY CHILD! The clone, the clone! He's Orochimaru's! Give him back, damn you, GIVE HIM BACK!"

"You're lucky we aren't tracking your ass down right now!" Screaming back, Naruto takes us back to the hallway where he blasted the hole through the roof. It's big enough for us to jump out of, so we do it as fast as possible. With the baby safely in his arms, we flee that hell.

"We brought it back," Naruto and I, now cleaned up, hand the squirming baby over to Tsunade. She peels the dirty blanket away from it and inspects it with her chakra.

"There doesn't seem to be anything done to it, but it's weak. It was probably born prematurely."

"What's going to happen to it?" I ask, since I know how Konoha treats unwanted children.

"I'll take care of it for a few years. I'll keep an eye on it's health. Hell, it'll give me something to do in retirement, right?" The little baby stretches a chubby arm towards Tsunade, which she gently takes in her hand.

"Are you just going to shove it into an apartment after that?" Naruto growls. Is he becoming protective of his clone?

To be more accurate, the child doesn't look too much like Naruto. It has a lighter shade of blond hair, and his eyes are a grayish blue. It doesn't have his whisker scars, his build, or many more of Naruto's defining features. The resemblance shows only when the baby smiles, since it's as crooked at Naruto's grin.

"Well, Naruto. In a few years, you might be married and want kids yourself. You could consider adopting him then. If not, I'll take care of him or find other parents."

"Why can't I just take care of him now?"

"Don't be stupid. You're just eighteen, and this is a sick baby! You're also about to become Hokage!"

"She has a point, Naruto," He listens to me, finally, and relaxes back into his chair.

"As for the rest of the hideout and Kuroni, I've sent a large group of ANBU to clear it out and some Tracker ninjas to find Kuroni."

"Okay. I hope they have stronger stomachs," We both groan, remembering the piles of flesh and puddles of blood.

"You two look like you need some rest. Go back to your inn and get some sleep," Tsunade dismisses us, and we make our way to our inn, leaving the child behind.

"Sasuke, what do you think about Aero as a name for him?"

"Ero? Are you trying to name him after your sensei in some weird way?" We step into our room and start laying out our futons.

"No, no, no, Aero, with an A. You know, air? But, yeah, it's sort of paying back Jiraiya, since he came up with my name. Uzumaki Aero!"

"Sounds alright. Now get to sleep."

"After all that we saw today? I probably won't get any sleep for a month!" He says it, but he's already pulling off his clothes and changing into his sleepwear.

"If you stayed up, I would drug your food. Or use Tsukiyomi, it's your choice."

"Brutal, Sasuke."

"I'm no where near what we saw earlier, dobe."

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><p>Okay, done, phew. Man, I just keep doing whatever, don't I? It wasn't until this chapter that I realized what I accidentally wrote into it. This ain't an Mpreg, but it appears my subplot has materialized an unplanned child for our boys. I'm serious, I didn't even notice I did that until I was trying to figure out what to do after this. So, this gives me the chance to kind of avoid my MpregNaruSasu child pet peeves. Sweet!


	9. Horse Trial: Trusting

**ANNOUNCEMENT AT BOTTOM, I'M CAMPING!**

Okay, lololol. I had a great first day of school, really, but it cuts into my writing time XP I carry a Hello Kitty notebook around if I ever come up with some ideas. This chapter turned out a LOT different than what I planned, probably because it could have spanned at least two chapters (You can tell by all of the line breaks!) Luckily, a bit more of it will be explained eventually but the subplot run-down at the very end of the whole story, so don't be too confused! Sorry about the lack of fluff, but oh boy do things start to heat up XP

I don't own Naruto, random reviewer comment placed at the bottom XP Enjoy this chapter, read and review as usual. Cyber popcorn because I can *~*~*

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><p><strong><em>Trial 8: Trusting<em>**

"No, go away..." Come on, man! I don't want to get up yet, I'm warm here!

"Naruto, we have to go. Get up."

"Nuh-uh!"

"Look, I don't want to do this, either," Huh? Sasuke's voice isn't quite right today. Maybe I'm just still sleeping. So sleepy...

"Dobe!" He smacks me in the back of my head. Trying to fight back, I fling my hands out to both sides of me. I can't figure out where he is, but I'm gonna grab on to his shirt.

But, uh, I really shouldn't have a shirt in both hands, right?

"Who?" As much as I don't want to, I wake up enough to sit up.

"It's Shikamaru. He's coming along with us to do this Trial," Damn, he's right! It's Shika!

"Hey, what's up, Shika? How did they convince you to wake up so early?"

"My mom bitched me out of bed. I really need a place of my own, but finding an apartment in Konoha is a pain in the ass," I admire Shikamaru. He's a jounin and a well-respected ninja, yet he's still a lazy bastard. That's my kind of guy, the type that won't change themselves for anything, just like me!

"Early? It's nearly noon. It doesn't even take twenty minutes to run here," Sheesh, Sasuke's pissy this morning. Then again, I was still awake when he finally fell asleep. That was about, oh, three hours ago?

"You just don't get it, Sasuke. A guy needs his sleep! Look at what happened to Gaara! Twelve years without sleep, he's a maniac. The second he got that demon out of him and caught some Z's, he turned into the nicest guy I know!"

"Aren't you forgetting about Chouji?" Right! Shikamaru's team mate is just a big lug, just don't tell him I said that. In fact...

"He's nice, but I'm still scared of him. The last time I even suggested that he had put on a few, pounds, he Meat Tanked me!" The week he did that, I had to train by reading scrolls. I couldn't move at all!

"Oi, as much as you two must enjoy chatting, this Trial sounds like it'll take a while."

"Hey, sorry we don't have social issues like you!"

"It's fine, Naruto. I didn't really expect a warm reception from him. I was the one who decided the rookies should kill him. Also, I'm sure he can sense that I don't trust him. Isn't that right, Sasuke?" Hey, lookie here. Guys! Guys?

"Can you stop glaring at each other for two seconds!"

"What, dobe? I thought you wanted to waste time on insignificant things. That's all I'm doing," You sly bastard, that was an insult to Shikamaru, wasn't it?

"Yeah, sure. Look, if you guys would just give me five fucking minutes, I'll be ready to go. Try not to be at each other's throats this whole time, it's annoying as hell!"

When I get back out from the bathroom where I just got dressed, I find Shika laying on my futon and Sasuke glaring at him from across the room, near the exit. I kinda figured that's how it would be, since I never saw Shika argue with someone for more than five minutes. He'd always tell me "It's too troublesome to go around in circles with stubborn people." That definitely applies to Sasuke, but that doesn't stop me from yelling at him. Hey, if I get tired of arguing, I just get the message across with my fists!

Using said fists, I wake the lazy ass up. He must've told Sasuke what the Trial is, but he didn't tell me yet, so I need him to wake the hell up!

"Come on, get up already! What's the Trial this time, huh? You better tell me it's sunshine and lollipops compared to our last one, or I ain't going unless you drag my ass!"

"Fine, just stop hitting me," he sighs, rubs his eyes, and takes his goddamn time before he tells me, "The hide out and Kuroni are being taken care of, so it's up to us to break up the villages who were protecting and supplying him. Given their placement, they were probably influenced by Orochimaru, but they don't seem like a threat."

"I've never heard of breaking up a village, but it sounds too easy! Though, there always seems to be a catch. So, get out with it, why is this a Trial and not just a mission for some ANBU?"

"It's a pointless nuisance. This is more of the elders trying to exert their power over us," Oh hell, not those fuckers again! If they're trying to make me reconsider becoming Hokage, they're doing a damn good job of it! Alright, relax, those two are super old and won't be able to annoy me for much longer!

"I don't particularly like them, either. They said something like 'The Hokage must be able to give orders as well as take orders. They have to trust the other shinobi in order to be trusted.' They know as well as I do that you and Sasuke aren't the type to take orders. That's why I'm here, to be your leash. You have to follow every single order I give, no matter what it is. If you don't, I have to fail you, as bothersome as that is for me."

"Every single one? Am I allowed to complain or even make suggestions?"

"They may have gotten us with this one, usuratonkachi. You and I aren't allowed to object to any of his directions. If we fail here, at least we know that we never have to be their puppets," Something about what he says hits a nerve with me.

"No way! I've wanted to become the Hokage my whole life, and I've worked too hard to get here! I've made a lot of promises, and I never go back on my word!" I point at Shikamaru, "I'll follow your orders, Shika! I would follow them even if it wasn't part of the Trial, you're someone I listen to."

"Tch, that wasn't the case a year ago," Shikamaru stands up next to me and slides his hands into his pockets.

"That was different!"

"How was it different. It was just orders."

"It wasn't just orders, you stupid asshole! It was Sasuke! You were trying to get him killed!"

"Whatever, past is past," He didn't just 'whatever' me! I'm about to give him a piece of my mind when I catch the look on Sasuke's face.

"What the hell are you smirking about, bastard!" I glare at him as I stomp past, "Come on! Let's get this over with!"

"You were the one taking too long, dumbass,"

"Ya know, maybe you need a gag, Sasuke, then you wouldn't be able to object or insult me!"

"I'd like to see you try,"

"Don't tempt me!"

"Are you guys like this every day? It'll be annoying if you two keep this up the whole time. You two should just kiss and make up, already," Shikamaru, you seriously need to watch what you're saying, or else both of us will gladly kick your smart ass!

"Is that really...Does that seriously count as an order?" Hey, hey, hey! Don't give him ideas, Sasuke!

"Sorry to disappoint you, but it wasn't an order. However, if you fight the whole way there, I'll consider making it one. Though, it doesn't seem like it would be much of a problem,"

"Are you trying to say something, Shika?" An order to kiss Sasuke? That sounds embarrassing as hell! Why wouldn't that be a problem?

"He's implying something, but it's not important. Let's go," Has Sasuke stopped glaring at Shikamaru since he got here? At this rate, I'm going to end up being the annoyed one!

* * *

><p>"The elders gave me some information about what we're getting into. According to their records, these villages have recently turned into tribes of some sort. Each of them has a shaman as their leader."<p>

"Shaman? I've only seen them in movies!"

"I seriously doubt that's how they are in real life."

"Yeah, what do you know, Sasuke? You've never seen them, either!"

"Be quiet. We're near the first tribe!" Damn, that's an order. Silently, Sasuke and I glare at each other until the huts come into view. They look just the way they do in movies! Take that, bastard!

"There's one important part of this Trial that I haven't mentioned fully. These villagers can't know we're the reason they're breaking up. Everything we do has to be in the shadows."

"No duh, we're ninjas!"

"We know, Naruto. Just keep quiet while I come up with a strategy," I'm going to be bored out of my mind, aren't I?

Hey, they're starting a big bonfire! Women dressed in bright, psychedelic dresses start flinging powder into it when it's finished. Every time they do, it turns some funky color, like purple or completely red. They stomp and spin and dance around the fire, flinging their arms in the air and shaking their hips around. Another group forms near them. Most of them have drums painted with really cool designs, but I also see a guitar player and a flutist. Two guys have those awesome, long things you blow into. What are they called? Didgeridoos, that's it! One drum starts up, and then another. Once they have a steady rhythm going, the guitar jumps in with buzzing riffs. The wooden flute doesn't sound anything like the metal, high pitched sound I'm used to hearing. If trees could sing, it would sound exactly like this.

It looks like such a great time, I have to remind myself constantly of the Trial so I don't join them. The party was about to be broken up, anyway, since some masked guy steps onto a high, decorative platform that I didn't notice until now. His mask isn't anything like the other ones we've seen. It's carved and painted to look like a pissed off, red god. The crazy, white fur that borders the whole mask sticks out nearly a foot away from him. The shaman is shirtless, but he's decked out in clay and feather jewelry. He has an intricate tree painted on his bare chest, for some reason known only to these people. He flings his arms up towards the sky, and every person answers with howls and whistles.

"I have heard the trees! I have brought you their messages! I am your savior!" Where have I heard that before?

"Bring me the food of the gods!" He bellows out, and they answer by playing their instruments and dancing again. The beat gets faster as a very flashy woman brings a wicker basket towards the platform. She bows down to him as she hands the basket to him. He plucks something from it and shoves it through the cut in his mask, so I assume he ate whatever it was. A moment later, he starts screaming.

"The skies shall open in three days time! The gods shall be watching that day! If any wrong me on that day, they shall feel the fury of the powers!" As he speaks, the woman with the basket takes it away somewhere.

"Follow her!" Shikamaru orders us around, but this one seems reasonable enough. It might be interesting to see what this guy ate to get so weird, but I don't see where Shika's going with this. Shouldn't we be listening to whatever the guy is telling the people? What if he's brainwashing them, or enslaving them in some way! Damn it, I hate taking orders!

The woman slips into a hut, so we have to wait in the trees until she comes back. I'm twiddling my thumbs for an hour, but she doesn't leave! Instead, the shaman guy walks in there, leaving his entourage behind.

"Do you think he's taking more of those mushroom?"

"Oh yeah, baby! Take it! Come on!" Holy fuck, are you serious? They can't really be doing that in there right now!

"We should be able to go in there, soon,"

"Um, Sasuke, are you deaf or something? They're having sex in there, why the hell do you think we'll be able to-"

"OH GODS!"

"That's why."

"Damn."

Just as Sasuke predicted, the sweaty couple leave the hut, giggling. Once we're in the clear, we walk in there to find that basket. The only light is one candle, but it's enough to see the mess that guy left behind.

"Gross! It even smells like sex in here! Do you guys see the basket anywhere? I wanna get outta here!"

"It's over here, dobe, but I don't know what's in it."

"I would assume it's a drug," Shikamaru picks one up, and I noticed it's familiar shape.

"It's a mushroom?" I take a few in my hand and roll them around with my fingers. Sasuke stays a few feet away from them. I don't blame him, he didn't have a very good experience with drugs before.

"This guy is using psychedelic mushrooms to have his 'visions', apparently," Now that Shikamaru has said that, he puts his fingertips together in his thinking pose.

"Getting anything yet?" I should know better than to interrupt him while he's thinking, but that isn't a good reason to hit me!

"I think I do. These people see that guy as their savior because of these visions, according to our observation. Now, what if everyone suddenly had that ability?" While he's talking, he pours the contents of the basket out into his back pack.

"We'd have to be able to drug everyone at the same time. The uproar needs to be big enough so that they'll split apart. If that's what you're thinking, it makes sense. If everyone is a shaman, it'll ruin their hierarchy," Oh, so they'll be nice to each other when they're showing off how smart they are, but not when it actually matters!

Shikamaru nods to Sasuke and me, then he leads us out of the gross hut. Back into the trees we go! Lately, I feel like I've been living in them. Hey, that would be kind of cool, right?

"Focus, Naruto," Heh, that's an order I probably couldn't follow even if I tried, but I make a show of attempting by squinting my eyes and shading the sun with one of my hands. I don't see why I even have to be looking out for anything, since this smarty pants will take care of the strategy while the other smarty pants glares at me. All I'm doing is following orders, it's easy and boring as hell.

"We could slip it into their food supply."

"They only have huts, Nara. Do you expect us to walk into every one of them unnoticed?"

"Then water, they obviously don't have plumbing. They have to all be getting their water from somewhere," Back and forth, back and forth, can't they just agree on something already?

"Not many places have wells around here. Since we can't contaminate a river or a stream, that's not an option."

"Seriously, guys. You sound like you're trying to figure out how to prank these guys! How about we paint silly faces on their huts, decorate the platform with toilet paper, spike the punch and call it a day?" Two sets of eyes swing over to me and glare as if I just insulted their ancestors and scratched my balls in public at the same time. Soon, however, the look changes entirely into one I can't place.

"What?" I'm trying to get an answer, but both of the so-called geniuses go into their thinking poses, Sasuke's being the one where he laces his fingers in front of his face while resting his elbows on something. It's his knees, in this case.

"We have a few days for this Trial. Let's set up camp and watch his show again tomorrow."

"Alright, we'll do that," Orders are orders, "Man, I knew we should've watched that guy!"

* * *

><p>Around noon time, the bonfire gets started again. I sway to the music and watch the dancers until the crazy guy gets on his platform again. His outfit and markings are just as random today as it was yesterday, but his mask is the same one. They go through the rigamarole of howling and screeching again, along with the fast drum beating. But this time, the mistress comes to him empty handed.<p>

"What! The gods have not sent the food yet? Well, stupid girl, go into the woods and beg for the gods' mercy! You better come back with the food, or else you will be shunned from this tribe as an unworthy one!" The girl bows deeply and runs off crying into the woods. Poor girl, she couldn't be more than sixteen, and she's already being taken advantage of by this creep!

"Meanwhile, all of you can enjoy your simple physical realm food early. Just remember to drink that lemonade, the gods told me clearly that it is important to ingest citrus to ward off evil!"

"Evil, or sickness?" Yeah, last time I heard, Vitamin C was supposed to be really good for your health. Hey, wait a minute!

"We're spiking the punch," Damn it, Shikamaru! That was _my idea!_

Currently, said lemonade stand is abandoned by the workers, since everybody's waiting to hear some news from 'the gods.' This gives me just enough time to sneak over there and pour all of the mushrooms into the huge barrel of lemonade they have out. Shikamaru and Sasuke spent too much time debating who should go, so I just took the shrooms and ran. Everyone else is dressed up brightly, anyway, so I probably would look like I fit in if anyone caught a glimpse of me. I doubt it, though, I'm pretty damn fast!

A few drinks later, and every 'shaman' was trying to push the other 'shamans' off of the platform where they all keep trying to share their visions. A huge group of them attack their leader and grab his mask. They fuck up when they fight over it, so the mask ends up flying through the air and landing in the bonfire, which grows ten times higher in an instant. Luckily, it dies out entirely the next moment. Some dancers band together and start tearing down the huts, screaming that they are an abomination to nature.

"Our job looks done here. Let's move on,"Yeah, Shika, we're only done because I had a super awesome plan. Just admit it! No, of course you won't, because you and Sasuke can't believe that I'm capable of coming up with strategies! I've done it tons of times before, especially during the war! Hell, they should be the ones learning to trust me and my plans, not the other way around!

But, no! I'm stuck taking orders from Shikamaru. Then after that, the elders get a shot at tying me down! Fuckin A!

* * *

><p>When the second crazy tribe came into view, one of the guys wrenches me back. I don't know which one until I feel the familiar hot breath against my neck. I should've figured, Sasuke's the only one I know who will refuse to speak above a whisper if it's not absolutely necessary...or does he just do that to me?<p>

"This has been too easy."

"I know! Who would've thought they would have a lemonade stand?" His answering scoff raises the little hairs on the back of my neck.

"No, you dolt, I mean Shikamaru's orders. This is supposed to test us, yet he's not telling us to do anything that we would object to."

"Well now you've gone and jinxed it! Look, Shikamaru's not the type to give orders that don't have a purpose. He'll just try to get this over as fast as possible so he can nap! Don't worry so much!" If I didn't have a chakra grip on the branch, he could've sent me flying with that shove!

"If you two will stop flirting, I'll be able to observe this village properly," Flirting! Did responsibility make you cheeky, Shika?

"They already seem more sane than the other village. They don't have huts, nothing is painted, and their clothes are normal," Smarty joins Pants on his look-out a meter above me.

"Normal, yeah. More like conservative, I haven't seen so many people in black and so many women in long skirts before," Not to take credit for it, but I noticed that a few seconds ago. There isn't a drop of bright color in any part of this drab village. It's fucking boring me to death just looking at it! Some spotless children try to play marbles in the dirt, and they get scolded immediately by five matronly chicks!

The guys tip their pointless hats at each other while women bustle around and work the few gardens around their settlement. There's like, one guy I can find who's doing any work, and he's pounding away at red-hot metal like it's nobody's business. The other guys? They're drinking tea while shooting the shit. None of them bat a damn eyelash when the women, their wives maybe, clean up the area around them, fill their cups, and set out sandwiches and cookies. No thank you, no acknowledgment at all!

"Do these guys have no respect? I'll beat the shit out of every one of 'em, maybe then they'll learn to appreciate when somebody's being nice!"

"Naruto, back off and look at them objectively. You're making an observation, not a critique. There's a few things you can learn from just observing. One, they are definitely patriarchal society, so there should be a man in charge somewhere. Second, they are very sober people. Thirdly, the women are largely ignored," You know, Shikamaru? I liked you better when you spoke like a dumb guy. Why can't you be a kid anymore, huh? Stop going on so many missions, dammit, they're aging you!

"They're so strict, that must mean their structure is highly fragile. If one person acts inappropriately, it could ruin their whole foundation. If you looked at history at all, Naruto, you would see the warning signs instantly," Sure, direct it all at me as if I couldn't have figured that out myself! I know better than anybody that people need to loosen the hell up!

"Alright, alright, I get it already. They're an easy target, that's what you're trying to say, right? So tell me, geniuses, what do you think will break them up?"

"This may be something we could leave to you, Naruto. Someone as bright and obnoxious as you should be able to come up with a way to freak them out"

"Exactly! You two would be nothing without my creative genius!" I'll ignore the fact that he insulted me, I don't get many real chances to gloat!

"Hey, genius, why don't you tone it down a bit? Are you trying to fail this Trial? They aren't supposed to know we're here!" I wave my hands in his face and zip my lips and sarcastically throw away a key. Bite me, Sasuke.

"Give him a moment to think about our plan, Sasuke. He needs it,"

"You're not the only one who can come up with plans, Shikamaru. Naruto probably has one already," A benefit of having my friends fighting? I'm always going to be defended!

"Yeah, Sasuke's right, I do!" Hooking my arm around Sasuke's neck, I put our heads together and grin at Shikamaru, who just sighs and lays down on a nearby branch. For the next few minutes, I ramble through what might be the most brilliant plan I've ever made.

"It's a prank, dobe. Not a plan,"

"Well, it worked last time, asshole! It'll work! This time, it'll only take one night!"

* * *

><p>A sweet-looking, busty girl tiptoes out of her little cabin. A cute little gift blocks her path, so she picks it up and checks the fancy label to see who gave her this vibrant gift.<p>

"From your fine leader? Mayor Jinshu? What ever could this be?" Her nimble fingers unlace the silky bow, but they drop the box as soon as she sees the vulgar contents. Out spills a light pink, lacy bra , big enough to fit Tsunade's tits. Her scream awakens the rest of the village women (the men like sleeping in, probably) who go outside to find their own gifts from their leader. Some of those fat matrons who scolded the kids received chains, leather whips, and handcuffs. Mothers push their children away from the boxes full of patterned thongs.

The whole time, I'm laughing my ass off. Not only at the villagers' expressions, but at the scowls on Sasuke and Shikamaru. I had tried to force them to wrap the gifts and pick out some of their favorite lingerie from the store we ran to in the night, but Shikamaru ordered me to do it all myself. No problem, I'll just be that much more proud of my work!

"Ah man, check it out!"

"Our leader is supposed to be a fine, pure, upstanding man! How dare he send us these...these sinful clothes!" A wailing cry passes through the crowd of women, and it manages to wake the rest of the men. They, to put it nicely, were not pleased with my presents, or should I say, Mayor Jinshu's gifts!

"Burn them! Send them to Hell where they belong with the tramps and whores!"

"Yes! Burn the clothing!" The girls cry out together, gathering up the offending boxes in their strong arms.

One man, fat with all the food his wife makes for him, speaks out from his group.

"I didn't mean the clothing."

"Shit, I didn't plan for this! I didn't mean for something like this to happen! Who the hell would even suggest to burn their mayor?" Shaking them around, I try to get Shikamaru and Sasuke to do something, but they would only watch the scene.

"Mayor Jinshu? But, dear, you said 'them'?" A muscular woman answers this slob with the softest voice I've heard on a woman that ripped.

"You women! You must have all put Mayor Jinshu under your spells! You forced him to give you these sinful things! You shall be burned! No wife of mine would receive such gifts, you are a witch!" Holy shit! Batshit insane, they are totally out of their fucking minds! I have to stop them, I have to save those helpless-

"What did you say?" His wife stepped towards the group of flabby men, flexing her arms threateningly.

"Oh," Shika shrugs as he speaks flatly, "I think they've got it handled. The third village is the main one we're supposed to take out. If we're done here, we have to get going."

"But what if those guys get killed, or the girls get hurt?" I'm not just leaving them right before a big fight breaks out! Already, girls are pulling their husbands' long hair and punching them in their double chins! Despite those horrid dresses, these women move a lot better than their primped men! Yeah, you go, kick their asses!

Alright, they're fine. I won't have to feel guilty, no way.

"It's in their hands, now. Let's go," It's not the easiest order to follow, but I'll live.

* * *

><p>"Oh gosh, it's so...sparkly," That doesn't even cover it. This place has more bling than a millionaire rapper! Every roof is topped with a large, yellow crystal, the paving stones on the streets are huge red gems, and the lanterns are glowing, orange diamonds!<p>

"Where could they have gotten all of this?"

"I'm not sure, really. Either they have a very lucrative industry of some sort, or they find these nearby. Search for signs of both possibilities. If they're a rich, drug-making village, that's one thing. If these are found around here, Konoha will want to know about it ASAP."

"Surely, the elders need a reason to be greedy fucks," I'm afraid of your claws, teme! At least I was thinking that it would be good for Konoha to have some extra income for when I come into office. We'd have the place fixed up in no time. But no, you go straight for their jugulars.

Heh, I like it.

Watching people for the third time is boring, but at least the buildings are nice to look at. I have a soft spot for the flashy things in the world. I like things that make statements, and these gems make the loudest one I've ever seen. It says "Do you see how rich I am? I get shined by the tears of albino peacocks, I'm so fine!" It's not classy whatsoever, but since when have I cared about that? It's shiny, so it's a win in my book!

Sasuke spots carts and tracks in the distance. He drops down from the top of the tree he was using as his crow's nest and gives us the low-down of the area.

"It's obviously bigger than the other two villages, and much more stable. However, they might be relying on these mines too much. If we can cause a cave-in to collapse their tunnels, it should be enough to bet them to rip up all of these gems and move along."

"Sounds like a plan, Uchiha. We'll use explosive notes on the support beams that should be in there."

"Hey, slow down," Don't glare at me, assholes! "Shouldn't we figure out why the hell there even are so many huge gems around here?"

"Sorry, Naruto. I have to give the orders. Place the explosive notes at the end of their work day and bring the mine down," Fuck him and his stupid orders, seriously. Huge gems don't just form randomly together in one place, especially not ones with different colors!

My thoughts didn't stop anything. Sasuke, Shikamaru, and I find ourselves hundreds of meters underground, surrounded by blinding, clear crystals.

"What the hell? Where are all the colored ones? We didn't pass any on the way here!" When I reach out to touch one of the crystals, it turns a vivid yellow. Sasuke, seeing what happened to the one I touched, reached out and touched another with his finger. In a flash, it turns a deep blue.

"Funny, I always said my chakra felt yellow."

"Chakra?" There he goes again, going into his thinking pose, "Naruto, use the Nine-tails chakra and touch another one."

"Whatever," Using my mode, I touch a small cluster of the crystals. They shine bright red for about three seconds before disintegrating, "Shit! What happened to them?"

"They absorb chakra, Naruto. They're not normal crystals, that's probably why they've grown so large. Most likely, they've been absorbing Natural energy ever since they began forming. Do you know what that means?"

"They are really zen?" Ow! You know, fucker, maybe you wouldn't think I was a dobe if you would just let me keep my brain cells instead of punching them out!

"No. Each of these crystals could probably power an entire city with the amount of energy they have. Natural energy can be used like electricity or fuel, but it's been impossible to contain it. Now that they have it..."

"They could become the most powerful people in the world. If they sold these or let the world know of their existence, it could cause mass chaos."

"But, couldn't it be used in a good way? If every village had one of these, they wouldn't have to worry about fuel or electricity. I'm sure some of the smaller villages could really use them!" I touch a few more as soon as I stop my mode, and they all turn the same bright yellow.

"Sasuke, touch the yellow ones," Sasuke follows the order, but they keep their color. They both nod, so they must be noticing something I'm not.

"What? Is there something wrong with them now?"

"No," Shikamaru touches some, and they turn dark green, "But once they've absorbed any amount of chakra, they won't take in any other kind."

"Okay, so? Those gems out there have chakra in them?"

"Yeah. It would take some experimenting, but I don't believe they can use the natural energy from them after they've been touched. The chakra would replace it entirely without anything actively balancing them. The ones out there don't have as much power as the ones in here."

"So, we're still destroying all of them, right?" I really wouldn't want to, but he gave the order earlier.

"Give me a moment. This might be a case we just take back to Konoha for further instruction." Shikamaru leaves Sasuke and I behind, so I turn to start yelling about my thoughts. He manages to get his out first, somehow.

"In order for all of those gems out there to be working still, the people who put their chakra into them must have poured in everything they had," H-hey? He doesn't mean that they...

"They were killed? For their chakra?"

"And that's how it would turn out if everyone had it! The feudal lord would jump all over using the shinobi for infinite fuel and electricity. He won't need their services if he had that much power, and there wouldn't be any more wars to worry about."

"That isn't fair, though! The natural energy could be used if people just wouldn't touch them!"

"Taking them out slowly enough to prevent touching them would take too long, dobe. He'd have to get it done fast enough that the other villages wouldn't notice."

"This could help people! I've seen so many villages where they don't have enough fuel for winter, or enough power to run basic appliances! Sasuke, if everyone had this, there wouldn't be any reason to fight over resources with other villages. If used correctly, these crystals might be our ticket to some actual peace!"

At least he gives the thought a mulling over instead of brushing it off entirely. However, he ultimately shakes his head at me.

"It won't work, dobe. Eventually, someone will want the power to themselves, even if they have to tear through villages to get it. We have to destroy them."

"Fuckin' A! I'll stop any asshole who tries to do that!"

"You won't always be there! Dobe, don't you get it?" Damn it, I'm tired of him thinking I can't understand! "Your job as Hokage won't be to make everything peaceful overnight! Everything's too fucked up for that. Your job is to set the foundation for peace for when the next generations take over. There won't always be someone who could stop this from turning into chaos."

Set a foundation? I want peace! I want to be able to see it with my own eyes. I don't want him to be right, but...damn it all.

Before he even gives the order, Sasuke and I begin destroying every last crystal before blowing up the mines. The ones in town are left, since they'll run out of their bloody chakra soon enough.

Another chance at peace blown to bits.

* * *

><p><strong>ANNOUNCEMENT! I'm going to be camping with my family starting tomorrow, and I won't have internet until Monday. However, I will be writing the next chapter as much as possible there, but I doubt it will be finished by the time I get back. Thanks for being so patient with me and my hectic life XP<br>**

**To cool bruhhh: **Cool story, bro. I could totally just write the story in my mind and keep it for myself, I like it. I'm proud of it. But, instead, I post it on FanFiction because I figure that there are others out there who would want to read some of the same things I do. So, if I spend a bunch of time writing it and I bother post it, why shouldn't I want to hear what they think? Not to mention, I have school and a life. Writing something this long isn't that easy, and I could spend my time on other things. Reviews provide the motivation I need to put this story into words for others to read. If that's review whoring, then super, I'll put on my fishnets and open wide~

I know I should care about improving my writing, but that happens automatically. It's something you can't really be taught, you can only learn and utilize different tricks. Now, if there's a part in the story where someone feels strongly that it's out of character or not interesting, I'd like to hear that before I post this as being completed.

And I know you might not read this, but this is to anyone else who thinks I sound desperate for reviews. I am, I can't lie, but I've never heard of that being a bad thing. XP

**To all of my awesome reviewers: **I'm not forcing you to spend two seconds typing your thoughts, but it's obviously appreciated XP With all that being said up there, don't assume I'm going to jump on every negative comment, I don't even think I jumped on that one. I just wanted to clarify a bit. I'm writing while I'm in the middle of Hurricane Irene, obviously I'm dedicated to the story and not just the reviews. I'm doing this mainly for myself and my girl friend XP


	10. Goat Trial: Understanding

Author's Note: Man, I'm starting to feel like this is a chronicle of my life up here in these author notes. First off, disclaimer, I don't own Naruto -do I have to say it every damn chapter...-

I don't know if anybody pays attention to the silly news about the East Coast weather in the US, but we're having flooding. Right now, we're under mandatory evacuation. Maybe that'll change by the time I post this. However, my house is stone and on a hill, and we just started getting water in our basement. I'm just hoping that any of my East Coast readers are okay.

I also just came back from a really great event called Stones Rising. It's nice to remember what it feels like to be in a place I happily call my home. A big lesson they were trying to teach there is **"Know Thyself", **so, I wanted to pass that gem off to my readers. The more you know yourself, the more you can figure out why you hate the things you hate and why you enjoy the things you enjoy. When you know that about yourself, you can start seeing similar stories in others.

Also, be the friend that everyone runs to when they have problems. It might be a hassle, and it might put a lot more on your plate than you want to, but you should never put anything above the well-being of people you care about. Naruto is one of those friends, but he's much more proactive than I'm suggesting XP

So sorry if this chapter is not your favorite, my mind is a bit elsewhere. If I end up not liking the Trial I pulled out of my ass, I'll consider it a bookmark and go back to fix it after I'm done.

* * *

><p><strong><em> Trial 9: Understanding<em>**

This idiot can't be serious.

I've made it very clear to him. I don't like being in Konoha, I don't like his friends, but more than everything else, I despise being forced into social situations.

So why did he even think for a moment that it would be okay to invite his crowd to dinner at a barbecue joint in Konoha? Great, all of the people I don't wish to talk to cramped into one room with me. Granted, not everyone will be there, but it's still too many. Neji, Shikamaru, Chouji, Kiba, Hinata, Sakura, Ino, and Sai were all invited, and they're the ones that agree to come. The rest of Neji's team is on a mission, and Shino had something more important to do. I try using that same excuse, but Naruto insists that pretending to have something to do is less important than subjecting myself to torture.

There isn't any point, so I had start walking back to the inn. Dobe takes a few punches before he comes up with an effective bribe.

"Hey! If you can spend this little bit of time here, I'll do the next report myself. You'll be able to go straight back to the inn! Now will you just come already?" He grabs and shakes me by the strap of my katana holster. What? It's perfectly customary to bring weapons to a social gathering with ninjas, certainly in my case. This way, I'll be able to slice them up when they start turning on us.

"Fine enough, but I'm warning you, dobe. If they annoy me, I'm leaving. I won't let you stop me the next time," Wrenching his hand away, I walk in the direction of the damn restaurant.

"Who said you'd be letting me? I could make you," He's too cocky for his own good, which is why he thinks he can slip his arm around my waist and walk in stride with me.

"You know, bastard, we can leave whenever you want. Chouji would make us stay for hours if we didn't bolt!" So, he's sucking up to me. Good, it means he's learning.

"We? Why is it always we, dobe? I've never agreed to being referred in conjunction with you," The restaurant is in sight, so I push his arm off me. I don't want to dwell upon the fact that I let it stay there for so long. That would lead my thoughts in the wrong direction entirely.

"Maa, Sasuke! We're working together, living together, and so we might as well have fun together," Somehow, I haven't overdosed on this idiot's presence.

"Fun is subjective," Though I say that, I'm still not stopping him from dragging me to the restaurant.

We end up being the last ones to arrive (We? Even I'm doing it...), so everyone has already started eating, or, in Chouji's case, inhaling.

"Damn, you guys! Can't you even wait two seconds for us to show up before you stuff your faces?" Naruto dashes around the room, hugging and greeting his friends. Meanwhile, I stay hovering between the hall and the doorway.

"Did you forget that Chouji was here?" Ino must be the only one who could say that without causing an Akimichi rampage. Hn, maybe that's something else I could give a try to get out of this.

""No, I didn't forget. That's why I brought extra money!" Of course, everyone laughs for the master of social skills.

"Why are you two so late, anyway?" Before Neji's answered, Naruto sits us down between Sakura and Shikamaru. Needless to say, I chose to sit next to my former team mate.

"Man, we aren't that late! It just took longer to get him to come than I thought it would," Well, nothing about that seemed strange to me, but then the girls started giggling. Did he really...seriously? Why do I always have to fix his mindless comments?

"I didn't want to be in Konoha for longer than necessary."

"Yeah, I just had to convince him!" Damn it, dobe! Keep your mouth shut, everything you say sounds perverted!

"Dig in, guys!" Look, Ino. One hyperactive blond is more than enough. Naruto throws enough meat on the grill for ten people, proving to me that his stomach is a black hole bigger than Chouji's.

"So, how did your last Trial go?" Sakura's directing the question at me, but Naruto answers for us.

"It was so easy! It was a bunch of pranks, except for the last one. Seriously, I felt like a kid again!" Turns out, part of the barbecue that Naruto had slapped on the grill was for me, since he puts it on a plate and sets it in front of me. Humoring him, I dip the meat slightly into the given sauce and eat it. At least dobe knows how to not overcook food.

"You are a kid, Naruto," Chouji expertly speaks around his food. He magically doesn't spit on me at all, even though I'm across from him.

"Asshole! I did what I had to do! You know damn well that I've changed since then!" I have to agree with him, though I don't verbalize it. If he hadn't changed, I wouldn't have listened to him whatsoever when the time came. The change was more dramatic for when I noticed it, since I hadn't been around him for the entire time like the others in Konoha.

He'll always be dobe to me, even if he becomes Hokage.

"N-Naruto-kun is right. His strategies during the war were a-amazing!" I'm sure you were only paying attention to his strategies, Hinata.

"I was also impressed during the war, Naruto," The other Hyuuga compliments him, "You managed to be passionate while keeping your thoughts calm. That's difficult for any shinobi during a war, but you did it."

"We all know he's his own kind of shinobi, guys," Kiba joins the conversation, though he continues to stuff meat into his mouth. He's sitting next to Chouji, so it might be some sort of dumb-ass competition.

"Heh, thanks!" Naruto hooks an arm around my neck and his other around Shikamaru's, "I love you guys, really!" Dobe is the only one I know who can sincerely say that to a room full of people.

"Speaking of that, didn't you invite us out to tell us something?" Sakura's eyes glint deviously. Looking as confused as I feel, Naruto asks her what the hell she's talking about.

"Uh, we all assumed..." When will these idiots realize that assumptions are nearly always incorrect? Depending on what they're talking about, it might be annoying enough to justify leaving.

"You mean you aren't announcing it yet? Man, and I had this whole speech thought out, too!" Why would Inuzuka ever feel obliged to make a speech about anything?

"What the hell is 'it'? I just wanted to hang out with everyone! I didn't plan an announcement!" No, I think I know what they're implying. Not this shit again, I just know Naruto'll say something ridiculous unless I set their facts straight.

"I'll say this once; Naruto and I are not together, or dating, or whatever it is that you suspect. I don't know what we've done to make it seem that way, but-"

"You're always together," Neji, don't you dare interrupt me with something so asinine.

""Naruto ran after you after rejecting me," Damn those Hyuugas!

"He whined about you constantly, man! I told him so!" Kiba, don't be a bitch.

"You listen to him and no one else," Just keep eating, fat-ass!

"I've been around you two sine the beginning," Sakura lays a gentle hand on my knee, "And I've seen it, even when I didn't want to."

So, not only do they believe the rumors, they perpetuate them with these twisted observations. There's a logical reason for everything I did! Naruto was the one who just ran with whatever his feelings said. Not me. I merely recognized that my path was leading to being controlled by Kabuto, so I rejected it and chose something different. I'm not in love with Naruto just because I chose him over the other fate!

"Last time I checked, this wasn't an intervention," Thirty more seconds of their stupidity, and I'm out.

"Okay, okay, stop playing. If I was dating anyone, I would just yell it out, not organize something like this!" He squeezes one of my tense shoulders. Maybe he's learned more of my verbal cues than I thought. His hand stays on until he's sure I won't try to leave. He manages to do a subject change, and we don't tread those waters for the rest of the time.

Though they aren't saying anything more, I can't help but notice their pointed glances every time Naruto gives me the food. Their stares intensify whenever he puts his hands on me, which happens much more often than necessary or wanted.

After two hours, Shikamaru gets up to leave. This is my chance to ask something that bothered me about the last Trial. I meet his eyes with my own, so he should get the message. Dobe starts to ask what's wrong, but I tell him that I'd be back.

He's right outside the restaurant when I leave. Finally, someone who can listen and follow orders without them being stated outright.

"So, what is it?" it doesn't matter that he's staring at the night sky instead of looking at me. I know where his focus lies, and it better stay on me every moment I speak.

"You wasted your chance. The elders gave you the opportunity to force me to leave. A couple of orders and I could've been in a deadly situation or one I would never agree to. Why didn't you?" Silence lingers for just a moment between us, but unlike Naruto, I have learned patience. If I hadn't, Shikamaru would already be incinerated by my Amaterasu.

"It would have been too troublesome," Really, now? I slam him into the wall with my arm and draw myself closer. He must not realize who he's addressing, so I might as well make it clear.

"You're regarded as a master of strategy, huh?" His eyes stay lazily on mine as I growl, "You're the only one who could have figured out a way to get me out of the picture without hurting Naruto's chances! Tell me, dammit! Why didn't you!"

"True, but I would be hurting him directly."

Am I supposed to believe that this is for him? Keeping me around is for Naruto and nothing more? I'm a threat, and they had realized it long before the bastards put me on death row!

"Chasing you was for Naruto. Protecting you was for Naruto," Finally, his voice begins to rise, "Letting you side with us was for Naruto. Taking you back was for Naruto. Putting you in jail was for Naruto! I have done nothing for just you!"

"The jail was your idea? You lied to him about where I was!" The star and shuriken spin in my eyes, reminding him of my position over him.

"Technically, it was a group effort, Uchiha. All I said was that Naruto needed to focus on training. If you weren't put somewhere else, he would be trying to help you with your transition back," So, I was put in storage in a jail? Why am I not surprised that these cowards would pick the only option that could eliminate any threat I pose?

"Death row was an afterthought, then, a way for you to make up for your utter incompetency?" Of course, why would be stupid enough to challenge me when I'm unchained and not blind? Most of the ninjas here wouldn't dare to fight me even if I was comatose.

"I never wanted you dead, you know. I wanted your revenge to end before you attacked people I care about. Naruto stopped that from happening. All I want now is for him to concern himself with his own problems for once."

"He's dragging me along for these Trials, so it seems that your goal is accomplished," My grip on him loosens, but I keep my tense stance and close proximity to him.

"No, it's not. The second he saw you again, all of his thoughts turned to you again. I saw it myself, so," Hn, it's his turn to threaten me, so his chest presses back against mind, "Don't you dare break his heart. You have to ability to do it. If you don't hurt him, then I won't regret what I did for you two."

"Nara, you-"

"The fuck, Shika!" Arms wrap around my waist and rip me away from Shikamaru. My back is assaulted by a familiar, muscular heat.

"Sorry, Naruto. Didn't meant to get so close," He shrugs and casually dusts himself off.

"What? You weren't fighting? Then, you were...?" Everyone gets the wrong idea, I'm sick of it. If anybody's coming on to me right now, dobe, I'd say it's the one who won't get his hands off me.

"We had a discussion about the last Trial. It devolved into an argument, dobe. Now let go of me," There's a hint of something when he slides his arms off me. Reluctancy? Can't be.

That doesn't stop the effect that the suggestion has on my heartbeat.

"I'll see you guys around. Stay safe, and good luck," With that and a single wave, Shikamaru strolls down the street. Coming in the opposite direction from him with a much more purposeful speed, an ANBU stops to address Naruto and I.

"The elders have requested a meeting with you two regarding the Trials," One fight to the next, no rest for the wicked. I doubt this next Trial will be a walk in the park.

It was the criminals against the executioners, but it's hard to tell which group was which. An unwavering aura of malice permeates the room. Delicious.

"You do realize, Uzumaki Naruto, that we aren't your enemies," I'm impressed that dobe didn't call bullshit on Koharu outloud, "If you do pass these Trials, we will be working very closely together. We shouldn't start that relationship off so poorly, don't you think?"

"Putting Sasuke on death row didn't start it off too nicely," For emphasis, I raised an eyebrow and brought the focus to what they fear most about me. The high contrast between Naruto and I serves as intimidation when we work in tandem. His bright colors come off as confident, quite like the flamboyancy of the alpha males in nature. I'm built for mental terrorism from the shadows, and swift destruction on the field. Together, we make a complete beast that strikes these elders with fearful awe.

In short, they're fucked.

"Now, Naruto. We've made an agreement and we will abide by it. All you have to do is complete the Trials we assign to you, such as this next one," I'm prepared for the level of difficulty of this next Trial. I needed a challenge.

"For your next Trials, we want to make sure that you understand that agreement. So we're going along as your comrades," They should hope they don't end up alone with me during this, then.

"You'd really risk going out alone with Sasuke and I? And what would our objective be?" Judging from his tone, Naruto is much more taken aback by this than I am. I knew to expect something drastic from them, but not anything that would get their own hands dirty.

"Our objective is to capture Kashiwa Kuroni. He eluded the ANBU until now and is said to have escaped into the Sound Country. Not only is this out of the Fire Country, but we're going to the very village that Sasuke joined after he became a missing nin. Therefore, we must come along. Concessions will be made for our safety, however," Ah, there it is. They're testing whether or not I would attempt to kill them when given the opportunity. It's even in a country that I'm more familiar with than any of them.

They think I'd also kill Naruto if I could get the elders at the same time. If I would do it in the Sound Country, I wouldn't even have to escape afterwards.

"We're not going to attack you, dumb asses. I'm trying to become the damn Hokage! Can't I just do that in peace?" It's strange to listen to his voice be a low growl instead of a childish whine like when we were young. I can't imagine Naruto in his twenties...thoughts, do you mind not digressing to Naruto when something important is going on?

"I doubt you'd be able to do that with Kuroni wandering around, dobe," On-topic, much better.

"You're right, Sasuke," he sighs and returns to glaring a the elders, "So, what are these 'concessions' going to be?"

"Before you over-react and do something improper, listen to the end," Mitokado pauses to note that we're paying attention, "You'll be given a chakra-activated cyanide bracelet. We promise to release it after the Trial is finished."

"Chakra-activated cyanide? How the fuck are we supposed to do our jutsus then, or anything?" My matching response is an animalistic growl. Not again, they are not putting me under restraints again!

"To be more precise, it's activated if we do a specific jutsu. It's similar to remote activation," I can't believe this is happening, really.

"We'd be able to kill you before you'd be able to make a single hand seal, you realize," Naruto and I both have taijutsu far more superior than even the Konoha Beasts. These decrepit, so-called shinobi should fear for their lives even if they have a sure-kill strapped onto us.

"Yes, and that is why it also activates if we die. Either way, you aren't coming anywhere near us," He's lying out his ass, I can see it.

"That may be true, but that would defeat the purpose of coming along in the first place. You want to see if I would betray you all, so why give me no choice in the matter? If I wanted an opportunity, I take it right now or during one of our reports, not when I would be killed by a bracelet."

"Who said anything about you getting a bracelet, Uchiha?"

She must be joking. So, that's they're plan, huh? Using Naruto's life as collateral is the best they could come up with?

Do they really think that would work on me?

Damn them!

"Get the hell away from him! You do a single thing to him and you two won't be the only ones I kill! Think for a moment about the consequences of pissing me off again! Would you really want to murder the world's only hope against me?" This isn't a moment for subtlety.

"Sasuke, it'll be fine, right? We'll go there, kick Kashiwa's ass, then come back. No one will do anything stupid," I know it's bad if Naruto's the level-headed one here. I just can't stand their arrogance, and they obviously hate mine.

Even if Naruto becomes Hokage, our relationship with the elders won't end well.

I'm appointed as the lead since I seem to be the only one who knows this territory. One would think that Konoha, or at least one of the neighboring countries, would have set out to do something about the Sound Country after the war. No, instead they've left it to its own devices. In the absence of Orochimaru's financial support, the whole country sank into poverty. Not even the thieves, loan sharks, or drug dealers have anything left.

"You've gotta be kidding me! This place looks worse than the old Wave Country!" I didn't feel the need to point out that these aren't regular citizens he's looking at from the trees. There are kids in the mixed crowd, so he has a right to his concerns.

"This country is not our issue. Kuroni is our target," Koharu tends to be the all-business type. Mitokado isn't any more trustworthy, but I don't have such a strong aversion to him. In my mind, they're lumped together as the elders.

"Can't we, like, annex them or whatever it's called? They aren't enemies anymore and they could help us rebuild," Just keep adding to your list of things to do as Hokage, usuratonkachi. Maybe you'll finish it by the time you retire, if you're lucky.

"And lower the status of the Fire Country even further? No, they'll just have to reap what they sow. They should've thought of this before they sided with someone like Orochimaru," If they would've bickered like this on the way here, I wouldn't have any patience left for this.

"So, since you two are the elders here and supposedly know more than we do, how are we going to find Kuroni?" The fucking idiot, he's leaving us open to orders from them!

"In a place like this, it's as simple as locking him in and smoking him out. Naruto, you use your kage bunshin and surround this village while Sasuke starts fires," Koharu's plan isn't anything new, but it visibly upsets Naruto.

"So we're supposed to burn their homes? They don't have anything else left! Let me just send in bunshins to check all the houses!" Also a reasonable plan, and it's one that doesn't require unnecessary damage. It's not as merciless, but it's more fitting plan for shinobi.

"He could escape that way, Naruto. We need you on the perimeter. Sasuke, begin using your Fireball jutsu when Naruto decides to follow orders," I should've known that they weren't planning on doing anything themselves. This is our Trial, so we shouldn't receive much help, but they could have changed out of their normal robes, at least.

"Amaterasu would be better for this," My Amaterasu? I can understand why that would be better, but why would Naruto be saying it?

"Whatever he wants," Mitokado gives me the okay, and Naruto proceeds to make thousands of clones. They let me go closer to the town so I could have more focus. Before I can activate the jutsu, a very small, black bird lands on my shoulder. When I look over to it, I notice it has blue eyes.

"I wasn't sure if you knew why I told you to use Amaterasu instead," So, the bird has Naruto's voice. Interesting idea, dobe. It's easier to keep in contact with me this way, and the elders won't find out. Plus, the bird should blend in with my hair from a distance.

"You're learning some good tricks with your bunshin, Naruto. However, I already assumed what you wanted of me. You want me to be able to pull the flames back, right?" I could prevent most of the damage that way.

"Not exactly. I don't really know too much about your Amaterasu, but can you control where it is?" The bird's head keeps twitching to the sides, but I'm picturing Naruto cocking his head to the side.

"I can control it. What's your plan, then?"

"Don't like the fire touch the buildings. Just have it hovering over. If you can do that, I'll transform a whole other batch of bunshins search the buildings. They'll be disguised as bugs or small animals like this one, so Kuroni and the elders won't notice. Can you do that?"

"Yeah. Amaterasu doesn't tire me anymore with these eyes," Naruto is going very far out of his way to help these people. Now that I think of it, "But, Naruto, the people will still panic if they see black flames over their houses."

"That's where it gets a bit tricky for you. Can you also put them all under a genjutsu?" Well, I've done a mass genjutsu before, but not while controlling such a large Amaterasu. Frankly, I don't foresee any problems.

"Alright. Just remember, most of these houses have trap doors and hidden rooms. They were all thieves, you know. Most of them are behind alcohol bottles, if I remember correctly."

"Hey, Sasuke?" He whistles lightly in my ear. It's low for a bird that size, so it comes off strangely.

"What, dobe?" He raises his feathery wing and skims over my cheek. I know he can't do anything but soft touches since he's a bird, but I keep picturing him being normal.

"I'll be fine."

"Hn," Of course you will be, dobe. That doesn't mean you should have a lethal injection strapped to your arm.

He puts his clones in place and gives me the signal to use the genjutsu. It's a simple cover up of the flames, so none of them look suspicious. Keeping the black fire away from the roofs while still making it look plausible isn't simple. There needs to be a little smoke and scent, so I let it scorch some of the roofs of completely abandoned buildings. Naruto begins his search for the crazy bastard in all the buildings.

An old inn with boarded up windows becomes my next target. It's near the outskirts of town and down wind, so hopefully the smoke will blow over the rest of the town and make the other flames seem legitimate. When the walls catch on fire, someone bursts through the boards. They cough incessantly and collapse on the ground. Damn it, after all that work to prevent hurting citizens, I'm the one to fuck up!

"They finally did it! They made their attack, but no way they could take me, no sirree! Those walls are no match for me! Ha! Look at them squirm, listen to them scream!" This horribly familiar screech precedes an obnoxious coughing fit.

"Naruto, I got him!"

"Right!" An orange flurry of bunshins speeds by and tackles the raving scientist. He's pulling out chunks of hair from his long beard for some inexplicable reason, and he's wearing a woman's kimono backwards. If his shoes weren't duct-taped on to him, they would've been flung off by Naruto's force.

"Orochimaru, you've come to save me! Orange lord, orange savior, orange light, orange soda! Would you like something to eat? I hear burnt wood tastes fantastic! Tee hee!" His head falls down limply, and I pull the hilt of my katana away from his neck.

"That should shut him up long enough to get him back to Konoha."

"Good job, good job," Naruto and I spin around and see Koharu approaching. Her wrinkled lips are turned upwards in a smirk, and her puffy eyes are slitted enough to glare at us.

"You didn't follow our orders very well," Mitokado looks displeased, but Koharu is obviously supposed to be the intimidating one. He stays behind her and doesn't break eye contact with me while Koharu directs her anger at Naruto.

"We said burn the houses, you don't even let the flames touch. We saw the people! You would think one of them would see the fires and start panicking. That was the point, you imbecile, to stir them up into revealing Kuroni!" Shit! I should have noticed such an obvious error!

"Naruto didn't know! I had a new idea and I wasn't able to tell him!" I have to cover for him. There aren't any other options!

"Oh? So what was your plan, then? Trick us into thinking you were following orders, then run away while we weren't paying attention!" Get that bracelet off of Naruto! I want to kill this bitch right now! Calm...I can't convince them unless I have a calm voice.

"Kuroni would be the only one of the citizens who could see the fires. He's not in the right mind, so the simple genjutsu didn't affect him. If he had been outside, I could have seen him panicking. When no one did, I began at the most likely places that a criminal would hide. I burned the old buildings until we found him, and we did. There shouldn't be any complaints about what I did. You said burn the houses, I just started in a different manner. Naruto did his job perfectly, so there shouldn't be a problem there," I let my lie sink in with them. Since they don't immediately claim that I'm being insubordinate, I feel as though I can relax.

"Damn it, Sasuke. Can't you at least think to tell me? I have bunshins surrounding the village; you could've talked to one of them!" Good, Naruto has become a better actor over the years.

"I apologize if there wasn't enough clarification on my front. Usually, if I'm given orders, they're more specific than 'burn the buildings'," I'm getting a bit too confident, though this is an appropriate moment for hubris. Koharu's spitting in anger, so Mitokado has to speak for her.

"We'll consider this Trial finished when you make your report back in the village. I know it was short, but you seem to have learned the lesson it was made to give. We'll be taking him to Konoha."

"Oi, take this damn bracelet off me!" Naruto flings his wrist in their face. A clunky bracelet is squeezing his wrist until his hand turns purple. The shining, metal ring breaks apart in half when Mitokado makes the Tiger seal.

"Homura, you idiot! You've just set them free in the Sound Country!" True, and they're also not in safe from us in this place.

"What? We're just gonna go back to our inn. It's been a long night! Hell, the sun's even starting to rise!" Naruto likes playing the nonchalant card, I see. That's a great way irritate someone as unstable as Koharu, so I commend him for using it. However, if the idiot doesn't knock it off soon, they'll start to suspect something.

"We'll see you in the afternoon, Uzumaki Naruto," Mitokado finishes with a seal and a puff of smoke, but Koharu lingers behind.

"Don't go thinking that your insolence bears no consequence," After her threat, she's gone.

"Oh, man, that was way too close!" Naruto collapses on the ground and cradles his growling stomach, "Why did you have to make me leave the barbecue joint, huh? I was still hungry! Now it's already morning, so I'm gonna miss breakfast, too!"

"Usuratonkachi, I didn't make you leave. I even said I would be back in," So, we finish a Trial, and all he can think about is his shortened dinner?

"Yeah, well, I thought I felt something slam into the restaurant. I went out to go check, and you're pinning Shikamaru against the wall!"

"I just wanted to know why he did some things," I shrug and join him on the ground. I've done enough to warrant sitting down. Doing Amaterasu and in conjunction with a genjutsu isn't enough to tire me out, but it still strains me to control it so precisely.

"What I wanna know is why our friends thought I was going to make an announcement! They're so weird. First they believe the rumors, now they actually expect it to come true! Seriously, what are they smoking, I mean-"

"I get it, they're idiots. Now shut up," I'm not going to listen to him ramble about how ridiculous it is to even assume that he would ever be interested in me.

He needs to make up his mind! Either there's a possibility, however slim, that he could find out that he's gay, or it's moronic to even think it could happen.

Not that I ever thought it would.

"Okay, I will, but not until I say this next thing," My glare doesn't dampen his high spirits, "That was a really cover story. You saved my ass back there."

"Don't celebrate too soon, dobe. You heard Koharu, right? Or were you too busy listening to your stomach?" He jabs me in the shoulder, so I snub him by casually re-adjusting my arm guard.

"I'm not deaf, teme. Big deal, though! We only have four more Trials!" His eyelids fly apart, "Wait! We only have four more Trials! I'm gonna become Hokage for sure! Sweet!" His celebration shouldn't include jumping me, but it does. Good thing we stayed out of sight, as I don't think any villagers would be kind to two boys rolling on the ground together. I just know they wouldn't take my protests into account, nor would they notice me pushing him away.

All they would see is two entangled boys.

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><p>I'm very glad to get this done, and somehow it didn't turn out like a piece of crap. I honestly had no clue what to do here, since I was too focused on the next few chapters *hurr de durr* By the way, I realize that this Trial has nothing to do with goats. The Horse Trial had nothing to do with horses. So, it's mostly about what they representtheir personalities. I just thought that some of you might be wondering about that XP

The water has receded, but I don't know the next time I'll have school. Until then, read and review *~*~*~*

By the way, extra butter popcorn for my 69th reviewer, Dashel ***~~*~~*~~*~~***


	11. Monkey Trial: Revelation

_ **Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. Duh. I really should just cram 100 words in this space just so I don't have to feel bad about posting something that's less than 5000 words. I know, it's not my normal size, but I figure that you guys would forgive me since it's for the story purpose. I could go into more detail into the stuff at the end, but I really wanted to save it for the next chapter. So don't feel cheated, pleaseee? I know I'm just releasing once a week, but that's school life for you!**_

_**Also, for anybody paying attention, this is the Monkey chapter. Note all of the random acrobatics they do XP**_

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><p><em> Trial 10: Revelation<em>

I need to scrub all this scummy crap off my face, it's itchy!

I just hope Sasuke's comfortable, it's a bit cold tonight.

Isn't there a washcloth anywhere in this damn inn? I should go ask the innkeeper...

...if she could turn the heat up a bit so Sasuke can sleep well.

DAMN IT! Ever since we got home, my mind has been pretty much obsessed over the bastard. I've been trying for the past hour to make it change the subject. I've tried counting my leftover kunai in my head, planning ahead for the next Trial, meditating, even (can't believe I'm admitting this!) masturbating! The last one was a complete failure, seeing as it took about thirty seconds into it before Sasuke was on my mind again.

Of course, it hasn't helped that I've read that Out Magazine front to back. Now I know more than I would ever want to know about gay sex, and then some. I said to Sasuke that we can only understand each other through our fists, but that is definitely NOT what I had in mind! No, that's scary as hell sounding! What's making me curious is the "vanilla" stuff, not the crazy BDSM, dominant/submissive parts. It was embarrassing to read through it while thinking of doing these things to Sasuke, but I figure that there's no harm in it.

Nothing's gonna come out of it, anyway.

Before I seem like a super pervert, I wanna clear something up. I swear, I do not think of screwing Sasuke every single moment we're around each other. Whether we're together or apart, I'm thinking about how he's doing, like, his well-being or whatever. I did the same thing when I was chasing him around, but it's weirder now. Seriously, I know how he is! I live with him! So, brain, shut the fuck up. He's fine! Let me wash my face in peace!

He's already getting into the futon by the time I find a washcloth and get out of the bathroom. Hey, he doesn't wear a sweatshirt to bed usually.

"Are you cold? I could go get the temperature turned up, if you want," I stop myself before I start asking a billion questions about how I could help him. I have a warmer sweatshirt, I could find more blankets, some tea would be good, I could make some food to go with that, should I make breakfast tomorrow- Gah, Fuckin A!

"I'll be fine once you get in," S-Sasuke, uh...heh? Our futons are together for some reason.

"Um, ah, I'll be getting in," Captain Obvious, this is mission control. Would you like to make your blush any brighter? We think "total tomato" may be a bit too subtle. Let's go for "red beacon you can see from space!"

"I figured that you're a human heater, so I wouldn't have to bother the innkeeper," Human Heater? Man, that's a really lame super hero name! Well, duty calls, so I start getting into bed.

"Take off your clothes, dobe,"

Haa? HAA? Right now? Really? Look, I'm not prepared whatsoever! We don't have anything for lube, and I'm still in my orange jumpsuit, so it-

Oh, fuckin A.

"What was that?" Gotta clear things up in my head! I can't sleep if I keep getting over-excited by stupid little things.

"I said take off your dirty clothes and get changed into actual sleep clothes. Pay more attention, usuratonkachi. I don't like repeating myself," It's a damn good thing that he did, though.

"Oh, duh! Of course! Sorry," Scrambling out of the futon, I run and strip at the same time. Once I'm down to my boxers, I throw a t-shirt and pajama pants on. I'm not sure why, but Sasuke's already completely covered in blankets.

"Well, I'm coming," My feet stop in their tracks, "In," No, wait! "To sleep!" Only Sasuke can scoff at me from underneath a blanket and somehow manage to make me feel like the stupid one. I backhand his shoulder before crawling into my side of the blankets.

Is he technically cuddling me? Or am I cuddling him? No, it can't be me, since I'm on my back. He's the one who's curling into me! I just happened to have my arm out when he decided to put his head on it. Satisfied that I'm not guilty of anything, I try to pull away without waking him up. Thing is, the only way I can do that is by sliding my hand past the back of his head. For only the third or so time that I can remember, I get to feel his thick, black hair. I've pet bunnies that didn't feel this soft! They didn't smell as nice, either.

Move along, idiot brain, or he'll wake up! I lower his head onto his pillow and skitter over to the bathroom. I'm just getting under the shower head when a loud slam comes from the other room, followed by a desperate-sounding woman's voice. Hey, that sounds a bit like-

"Naruto, get out here. It's Shizune. Something's going on," I figured it was Shizune, but I hope Tsunade's alright! I do get out there, but all I can throw on is a towel around my waist. Now I know how Sasuke felt (Hint, hint: Not too good.)

"Is this about Tsunade or the next Trial?" Poor Shizune, she looks like she rolled out of bed and was sent straight over to here.

"Tsunade-sama told me that this was to be a Trial, but it's much more important than that!" As a nervous tic, she keeps furrowing and unfurrowing her brow. She should've brought Tonton along, hugging her normally keeps Shizune calm.

"Is there a reason you're panicking instead of telling us what's going on?" I should punch Sasuke for being rude, but I want her to get to the point, too.

"It's Shikamaru! He's been arrested by the elders for mutiny. He's being held in Konoha Prison's sixth block, cell 24." Sasuke cringes when he hears where the bastards locked Shikamaru.

"That was the block over from mine. I still remember the screams," Fuckin' A! We need to go save him right the hell now!

"That block is reserved for the criminally insane, but the elders insisted on placing him there! He'll get killed if you don't get him out!" I hold her shoulders to try to steady her. She coughs and thanks me. Shizune and Shikamaru worked pretty close together during the war, so I'm not surprised that she's worried about him as a friend.

"So, that's why I'm here. Tsunade assigned this as a make-shift Trial in place of whatever the elders had planned. She doesn't know why the elders wanted to put him away, so she wants you to get him out," Jailbreak? Sweet! Except, when I look to see Sasuke's reaction, he looks haunted by the idea of going back to the place where he was imprisoned. I let go of Shizune and place my hands on both sides of Sasuke's face.

"If you want, you could just keep lookout on the roof with one of my clones. I won't make you go in there," Sasuke shakes his head slightly, so I can feel my callused hands graze over his smooth skin. He's like me, I guess, since I don't get any facial hair, either.

"You need me for navigation, at the very least. There are certain blocks that suppress chakra, and others that set off an alarm when chakra is detected. I spent most of my time memorizing the whole prison system."

"You were planning to escape, weren't you! Sly bastard, why didn't you?" He probably would have been able to escape within a month!

"I had a plan for getting out, but I had none for what I would do afterward. Being in jail gave me some time to be introspective and alone. When I didn't want to be alone anymore, and I hadn't heard from you at all, that's when it became a problem," His gaze lowers away from mine, and a pang of guilt makes it's way through my chest and up to my throat. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry...

"You don't have to forgive me for that, you know. Not that I ever thought you would, I'm just saying-"

"I did already, dobe. Now let go of me, you're making Shizune uncomfortable," I'm touching your face, Sasuke, so shouldn't you be the uncomfortable one?

"Heh, sorry," My hands fall to my sides and I sheepishly grin at Shizune. Don't think I can't see that blush, missy! What kind of thoughts are you having, hm?

"You guys should go!" That's weird, we're all going to Konoha, aren't we?

"Aren't you coming with us?" Sasuke always manages to ask the question while I'm thinking it in my head. Damn it, I'm not slow!

"Tsunade thinks they might send some people here for you, so I'm going to stay here as your cover," Man, that old hag always thinks about every possibility. I should get better at doing that if I'm going to be the next Hokage!

"Alright, we'll be going, then!"

"Put clothes on first, dobe," Hey, you weren't bothered by it, earlier! In fact, didn't you look down at one point? Ha!

"Nah, I'll just go like this and make all of the guards pass out from blood loss! See, I can make plans, too!" He pushes me (I'm laughing my ass off) and slaps me on my bare back. I yell, but I still chuckle until I'm in the bathroom. I get changed into my normal orange jumpsuit and walk back out.

"Dobe, for once in your life, try to attempt to be sneaky. Wear black," But that's, like...(what's the word?), sacrilegious or something!

"If it pleases you, sire," It's nice to get a jab in every once in a while. I sift through the supply boxes until I find something acceptable. Once I'm in the bathroom again, I pull off my normal clothes and shove on a sleeveless, skin-tight, black ANBU shirt. The pants aren't regulation, but they're black cargoes, so they're close enough.

"Hey, you aren't wearing black!" Normally, his eyes would look down at his own white shirt. Instead, they seem to be glued to my bared arms. For a split second, they slide over the places where my shirt defines my chest and abs. Damn, I should've looked in a mirror, 'cause I bet I look real good.

"I have the ability to sneak when necessary. In a glaring orange jumpsuit, you don't even have the option," Point taken.

"Fine! Let's just go already! Shikamaru's waiting for us, we don't have time to be playing dress-up!"

"We're off, then," Sasuke turns to Shizune, who's making a pot of tea in our kitchen, "Don't let them take you, too. I don't want to go back there more than once."

"I can take care of myself, Uchiha-san," I've seen her fight. Her poisons are scary as hell!

"I believe you," That's probably the closest to a compliment anybody will ever get out of him, so I hope she's happy. With goodbyes out of the way, we leave to go break our friend out of prison.

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><p>Sneaking around my own village is one of the creepiest feelings. It's like I'm an actual traitor, you know? Now, I'm doing this on orders and because it's a Trial, but it's still illegal! I used to do the occasional prank and vandalism, but I never wanted to land in a cell. Just thinking about it is making me feel (What is that term, it has something to do with claws, right? Whatever!) really uncomfortable. The wooden walls seem too close together, and the smelly dumpster is just totally noisome (There, since I didn't know the last big word, I'll use a different one!)<p>

"Are you listening to me, dobe?" Hey, just because I'm on the look out for anybody coming past this alley doesn't mean I'm not paying attention to your plan, Sasuke.

"Heard you loud and clear, Saucy. We go in, find the nearest vent system, crawl around the alarmed areas, pop out, throw Shikamaru into a reverse-summoning scroll, then ditch the place. None of that explains why I'm wearing black."

"For the last time, it's because we need to be ninjas for this to work!" He slugs me in the gut, "And what the hell, Naruto? Saucy? Stick with teme if you don't want to be eating your own leg."

"Whatever you say," It's all I can get out through coughing and laughing at the same time.

"Shut up and get ready to go in," Teme grabs our bags and throws them in the nearby dumpster.

"Sheesh! Who made you the leader? Shikamaru's my friend, last time I checked!" I could complain for longer, but Sasuke's already transforming into the agreed form. It sucks! I wear black, and yet we have to transform into little mice for this first run. Why not a centipede, or a fly, something that can go faster and people pay less attention to? What about anything else that's cooler than stupid mice? I asked him that on the way here, and he said something about not knowing the "logistics" of how a fly's body or a centipede's body is constructed. We did mice in the Academy, so he probably figured that's all I would know how to do. Man, if I can transform myself into a hot chick, I think I can make myself into a spider!

Still, Sasuke squeaking orders will be great teasing fuel for later.

"Follow me, dobe," Actually, a black and white mouse with Sasuke's normal voice is hilarious by itself! I should get Killer Bee to transform some time so he can rap as something stupid looking. I'll save that idea for later, since Sasuke would kill me if I didn't pay attention. I get it, this is a Trial, and our friend is in danger. That doesn't make this any less fun for me!

We skitter over to the opening side of the door and curl up in wait until we find an opportunity to slide in. Some random guard walking out for his lunch break lets us in eventually. There are way too many guards in this first room, but Sasuke ducks us into a nearby hallway before we're detected. We have to crawl through grates and wires blocking the outside rooms from the first cell block, but our little bodies squeeze past easily.

The next part of the plan is to find a vent big enough for our normal bodies to crawl through. Now where the hell would they need one of those?

Shit! Three female guards are marching towards us side-by-side. If they see us, their shrieks will alert the whole damn prison!

With his teeth, Sasuke yanks my ear towards a door that's swinging open. As fast as our little legs can, we scurry into what ends up being an empty bathroom.

"Stand up on your hind legs on three," Sasuke says the counts, and I rear up. In a flash, he uses my head as a jumping platform, swings up on sink pipes, and digs his claws into the hanging paper towels. It starts unfurling, but Sasuke manages to jump onto the faucet. He leaps from faucet to faucet, turning all of them on purposefully. For his finishing move, he springs up and pushes in the air dryer button. Under the noisy cover, he and I undo the transformation with a pop and cloud of smoke. He casually turns off the faucets and produces a black marker, some paper, and a roll of tape from his weapons pouch.

"Write 'Do Not Enter, Leaking Pipes' on this and tape it on the door," I don't even glare at him for ordering me around before I scrawl the note. While I do that, he double-checks the stalls for hiding chicks. Yeah, this is the women's restroom, all right. There aren't any urinals, and I'm not dying from the smell.

"It's not the vent I expected us to use, but there is one in here. We'll use it," I follow his voice into the last stall.

"The handicapped stall? That's kinda wrong, don't you think?" He's getting in ahead of me so he can lead us in the right direction, so I just hold the vent cover for him.

"We don't have time to worry about political correctness. Get in and put the cover back on behind you."

"Sheesh, you don't have to be so forceful," Why not yank his chain when I can, right?

"Tch. Don't go too far, dobe," he somehow glazes over the first innuendo with another one without making it seem like he noticed. That's some fucking skill right there! If I wasn't at least attempting to be sneaky, I would've burst out laughing. Instead, I jump up into the ceiling vent and replace the cover behind me, as I was told to do. It's a vertical climb for a while, but we easily stick to the metal walls with chakra. A turn here, a turn there, I follow Sasuke in total darkness. Thanks to his Sharingan, the bastard can see just fine.

"Alright. We're almost there," Though Sasuke's whispering, it bounces off the metal walls and sounds much louder than it should, "Are you ready for your part?"

"Yeah, no problem here."

"Good, because here's the opening for Shikamaru's cell block," Slivers of light come through the vent opening that Sasuke crawls over. After listening to a second, we figure that no one's around. Quickly but quietly, I pull the vent opening off and pop my head through the opening.

"It's clear," Standard ninja procedures – I follow them. Sometimes.

"Get down there. His cell should be three cells to your left."

Taking the cover with me, I slide out of the opening, flip forward once, and land on my feet silently. After handing the grate back to Sasuke, I run to find Shikamaru's cell.

Oh, whoops. I forgot part of the plan. I was supposed to be on the look-out for keys we can steal. I've seen people pick locks with senbon needles, but I never learned how to do it. I don't have any time to waste being embarrassed about my mistake, so I get back to Sasuke pronto.

"Oi, do you know how to pick locks?"

"Dobe, you were supposed to-"

"I know, I know. We didn't have time!" It takes a lot of self-control to keep my voice down, but somehow I do.

"Yeah. I made a back-up plan in case you fucked up, anyway," Oh, I see how it is. Asshole!

I nearly get brained by the vent cover falling down on me, and then again by Sasuke coming out of the vent. Heh, his bangs flew up and flailed around when he was falling, I just love it when they do that.

He finds the cell himself and stands in front of it. Suddenly, a black flame starts burning the the metal locks. They get white-hot, and soon turn all melty, like some gross kind of ice cream. He pulls back his Amaterasu and opens the door.

"Oh, it's you guys," This lazy bastard's staring at the stone ceiling as if it were the sky! It's like he doesn't even give a damn that he's in jail!

"Were you expecting anyone else?" I wanna be able to make come-backs as fast as Sasuke. I need to start practicing that right away! I mean, after we save Shikamaru, of course.

"Not really. I wouldn't want Ino or Chouji to risk coming in here, and I think Tsunade knows that. So, logically, she sent you two."

"Everything always has to be so damn logical, huh?" I hate those "It's a genius thing", uh, things. However, I'm teasing him as a fellow reformed Academy loser.

Shikamaru glances over to me, then back to Sasuke, "No, sometimes it's just common sense," What is that supposed to mean?

"We'll have time to talk later. For now, prick your finger and sign this scroll," Sasuke flips open my weapon pouch and grabs the reverse-summoning scroll. Shikamaru slides it open, bites his thumb, then uses the blood to write his name on the scroll. Sasuke does a few hand seals and slams his hand on the scroll. Shikamaru disappears from his cell and is successfully freed from prison! Hell yeah!

"Now us," That's what Sasuke says, but we both hear the guards approaching.

"Shit, I didn't know they would get alerted when someone gets summoned out!" We flew out of that cell and disappeared down the next hallway. We heard the guards coming from that direction.

"Here!" There's a cell without a name outside the door! No one's in it! It's not even locked, so I rip it open and throw us into it. The guards go screaming by, since they all think they should be looking for someone who left the prison. Do they really have such dumb asses working to guard dangerous criminals? Man, just another thing I need to change when I become Hokage! I need to get these guys trained up ASAP!

And what the hell are they thinking, letting the inmates come out right now? It must be lunch time, since that's what that guard was going out for earlier. Shouldn't they be in lock-down mode? Sasuke and I stare out the little cell window, waiting for the inmates to pass us by. When they're gone, he turns around and finds the light switch. I keep looking out, just in case, but that doesn't last for long.

"Alright, don't panick," I'm telling myself more than Sasuke, "We'll just wait until things cool down, then do our scrolls. Right?"

"Why?" Judging by his tone, he isn't asking me to explain the plan.

"What's the – Whoa!" Dobe, dobe, dobe, usuratonkachi, Naruto. The walls are carved up with my name, over and over again. It's on the floors, the walls, even the low ceiling. There's only one person who could've done this.

"Your cell? This was yours?"

"I never got to see it, to be honest. I couldn't take off my blindfold."

For an entire year, Sasuke was in this very cell. Since he couldn't see it, he had to feel it with his other senses. I can picture him here, crawling on the floors and marking them up with my name. Wherever he could lay his hands, he wrote to me.

He was calling out to me. And I failed him.

I wasn't there when he needed me this desperately. The guilt hits me like a kunai to the heart, or his fist through my chest (pangs pierce through that healed wound, now more than ever before.)

"It's all I could think to do, other than dread my hair. I didn't realize how much I carved," Why won't you look at me when you're talking, Sasuke?

Hell, I wouldn't look at me.

My fingers brush over the rough grooves that Sasuke put in the walls, spelling my name. Though I'm late, I need to answer them. Now.

"I'm here now, Sasuke. I know it doesn't make up for that, but-"

"You didn't owe me. Before you saved me from death row, you had already saved my life. I knew when I was sitting in here that I wouldn't even be alive without you. It was a simple fact," Do I really deserve that credit?

"I could've done more. Not just when you left, but before then. You were right, I was a naïve idiot. I should've helped you," My tracing hand curls into a fist against the wall.

"That's what you're doing now, isn't it?"

Now? The present. Sasuke's talking about the present. That's obvious, I know, but I didn't notice something until he said it. It's just hard to believe.

Sasuke has moved on, and yet . . . He's still with me. It's everything I'd hoped for since I heard about his desire for revenge. His sanity is in check, he's in Konoha, and he even helps out my friends. At this very second, he's helping me accomplish my dream.

This isn't the boy who I used to fight with. This guy, no, this _man _(When did he make the transition, huh? When did I?) is none other than Uchiha Sasuke.

He has a bunch of things that he hates, and very few things that he likes. He doesn't have just an ambition anymore, now he can have dreams. He specifically likes tomatos and hates natto. If he doesn't spend some time outside, he gets pissy. He absolutely has to sleep on his right side. He's a bastard, a teme, and an asshole.

But you know what? I'm in love with him anyway.

"Dobe?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

I'll never know if Sasuke expected it. He might have been turning when I took him by the shoulders. Then again, it took him a moment to react.

Whatever. All that matters is that he's kissing me back.

* * *

><p>Before anybody says it, I know the word claustrophobic. Naruto though, who knows! And yes I know, I'm such a cocktease, even to myself. Damn it, I want the good stuff fuuu!<p>

Oh yes, I realize this one is ridiculously shorter than most. Looks like I just manage to post once a week now that school's in, so bleh. I'm writing during school, even. Random note, New Year's Day by U2 came up while I was writing this last part, so if you feel like listening to that while reading it, it sort of fits the atmosphere.

I decided to also give reviewer shout-outs to beef up the word count and to repay you guys back for a short, yet pivotal, chapter XP

By the way, I don't know if I ever explained this, or needed to explain it, but for cyber popcorn * that is the popcorn and ~ is the butter/steam. Lol, just thought I'd clear that up.

**To Mabutashi: **You need to tell me which part seems like FF7, because it's super awesome that anything even remotely reminds you of such an awesome game. And I apologize for the contact high (not really XP) I hope you like my story, here's some cyber popcorn: *~*~*~*

**To moopad: **Baa Baa Black sheep XP Thanks for covering my ass for plot holes! I try to avoid them, but who cares that much about a fan fiction having inconsequential plot holes? Who's going to go OMFG WHERE'S THE GOAT, BITCH! WHERE! And thanks for liking the Trials. There are going to be some chapters after the Trials, so look forward to them I guess! *~*~* I'm thinking of taking requests since I like my reviewers so much .

**To Hoshimi Mika: **An hour? I wish I could read fan fics that fast :( lol *~*~* cyber popcorn for you !

**To Emirri: **I found this review particularly ironic, since you were commending me for taking it slowly when I had planned for this chapter to be the "confession" chapter XP *~*~* I hope that's slow enough for you!

**To jinto22: **I love regular reviewers, and you're a really great one. I'm half tempted to take one-shot (SasuNaru or NaruSasu) from regular reviewers...after the Trials are done, of course! -whistles innocently and hands you cyber popcorn *~*~*-

**To maxridelover: **Does your name imply Maximum Ride, the book series? If it does, sweet, I made my book club do those books when I was in middle school XP James Patterson is effin amazing as a writer. Hey, cool hat -takes it and gives you cyber popcorn in return *~*~*-

**To Cogasha: **I extend the same thing I said to jinto and moopad to you, since you all seem to review a lot. You and a few others XP Thanks for all the awesome reviews *~*~*

**To kilala-hunters: **I especially wanna thank you for sticking around for so long 0-0 Ah, fuck it, I'll extend the request thing to anybody who asks, since I can't keep track even of who my regulars are. I have so frikken many now it's blows my brains. You always remember your first, though! Love you! *~*~*

**to xXxvirtuosoxXx: **I'm glad that you're even happy when I update, though I feel bad for making it less often than it was supposed to be originally. I mean, damn, right? However, I hope you like this chapter XP *~*~*

**to Dashel: **I'm glad I'm not the only pervert who noticed -wink- lol. And yet another person who's like "Little touches? Me likey" and yet here's this chapter and SHEBANG. I had this planned out since the beginning but now you guys are making me feel like I rushed it XP

**SUPER CYBER POPCORN FOR EVERYONE ELSE BECAUSE DAMN I GOTTA GO SOMEWHERE! *~*~*~*~*~*~* I LOVE YOU GUYS ALMOST AS MUCH AS I LOVE NARUTO AND SASUKE BEING TOGETHER! FOR ALL MY READERS STILL IN SCHOOL, I'M SUFFERING WITH YOU!**


	12. Rooster Trial: Doubting

This is the Rooster Trial! Roosters are super-blunt (Kind of like me, though I'm a Dog XP), so I decided to use a good amount of this chapter to be straight-forward about my previous Trials. It's not all a summary, though, since our boys finally kissed! Have fun!

Beh, I don't own anything.

* * *

><p><em>Trial 11: Doubting<em>

If I were to have tried describing my thoughts while we k– did _that_, it would have been a slurry of fragmented thoughts along with periods of white noise. Some dolt said that the only time one has a flashback of their entire life is during a near-death experience (Though I have had one of those, and it also focused on Naruto), but no one said that it happens when you're kissed.

I couldn't believe that it was dobe who owned the warm hands that pulled me into his embrace. My Sharingan saw his intention, but I didn't do anything to stop it. I was expecting his mouth to crash into mine (It's the only feeling I have associated with kissing so far), but our lips met in the middle. He sighed into me and wrapped an arm around my waist. At this point, I entirely forgot what was outside his arms. Since my eyes were closed, it didn't even matter where we were.

Again, I misjudged him. What I thought was going to be a short, aggressive peck turned into something that (admittedly) left me boneless. My arms only wrapped around his neck to keep myself upright, not to pull him even closer. No, really. That was all.

The idiot had taken it as encouragement, apparently, since my lips were slicked over by what I knew to be his tongue. He coaxes my mouth open, but he doesn't dive in and choke me as I thought he would. Naruto also doesn't keep us like that for too long, which would just have made things awkward. On his third return, I went to him. Presumably going by his ramen-eating instincts, he takes control again by sucking my tongue into his mouth. It's messy as hell, and both of our chins are dripping, but we've hardly had the practice to make it any better.

Finally, we parted mutually. I gathered my thoughts in the time it took us to languidly open our heavy lids.

* * *

><p>Now, and only just now, do I understand what he told me without using words (Our preferred method of communication, though it used to be fists.) What I'm going to do about it, I haven't a clue. However, I'm not completely certain that my assumption is correct. With what dobe told me earlier, I'm fairly sure that this isn't something easily misinterpreted.<p>

"Heh, you think too much, Sasuke," Where did that tone of voice come from? Couple wit hhis gentle fingers travelling through my hair, Naruto's calm voice sends a shiver down my spine. It's his eyes that reveal the most to me; the light in them has changed entirely.

"Do I have to say it, teme?" He thinks I don't know what he means. It's best to clarify that before he goes off and says it over and over again.

"No," His features drop a notch, so I fix myself, "No, I know what you mean."

"And?" Oh, so now he wants a response? I'm having a hard enough time staying calm, and he's expecting me to be able to explain everything in words already? Speaking of which, how is he so relaxed after what we've done?

"If you get us out of here, maybe I'll say," Waiting for Naruto to come up with a plan should give me enough time to regain my sense.

"You're a tease, d'ya know that?" A tease, but not in the way he normally does. So, putting aside actual feelings, it's pretty clear that he wants me. He always seems to be wanting me; wanting me back, wanting me by his side, wanting to be my equal, wanting to help me, wanting to know if I'm okay. This appears to be the next step of dobe's desires.

After a cursory glance around the room, Naruto's grin widens.

"Leave everything to me!" How could he have possibly thought up a plan that fast?

"This hallway's alarmed, right?"

"Actually, they had to change the alarm in here for me. My Eternal Mangekyou set it off immediately, but I can't turn it off. I'm not sure if they changed it back."

"Well, that means it's probably already meeting its minimum. Are there any other tricks this pony has?" After a year of studying it, I know exactly what other safety measures they have here in Konoha Prison.

"Every cell has a chakra absorber and an alarm that goes off if it absorbs anything. All of the outer halls in the prison have gates, sirens, and ANBU guards that always keep post there," I give him the rest of the information about the prison, "What are you planning?"

"Heh. Just one more thing. Are you sure that Shika's safe?" I can't see where he could possibly be going with this.

"He should be at our inn, so yes," For no reason, he presses close against me. Placing a hand on my chest, he backs me up slowly. His glinting, different-feeling eyes never leave mine.

"Eh?" Suddenly, I'm on my back, caught by my old bed. From between my legs, Naruto approaches me. Bending over until our noses touch, he hovers over me for a moment. Is he going to kiss me again, just out of the blue?

Then the bastard pulls away as fast as he came! He makes a point of dusting himself off, flaunting how easily I succumbed to his will.

"Just thought I'd get you back for teasing," Reminder to self: begin confession with a punch to his cocky face, "Now, get under the bed. I'm about to send a warning to the elders. They should _never_ fuck with my friends."

"Don't do anything stupid, dobe!" he laughs a couple times, yet again sounding older than he did twenty minutes ago.

"I think everything I do is automatically considered stupid. It never stopped me before!" His signature "Nice Guy" pose settles it. He's going to do something idiotic.

"Tch," As dignified as possible, I push up from the bed and slide underneath it. I can only see his feet in the middle of my cell.

"Alright!" Naruto audibly claps and rubs his hands together. Growling with effort, Naruto gathers a ridiculous amount of chakra, enough to have him double over. Red and blue chakra swirls like a tornado around the room, only just missing me. With a roar, Naruto lets go of the energy, letting it explode out from him. The shockwave tears the door off its hinges and begins setting off the alarms. One by one, every siren in the prison sounded.

First comes the dogs, and then the prison guards. Naruto whips out a kunai from his pack and confronts the first burly guard. I hear their kunai clanging together until they get locked in a stalemate. Silently, I slice the back of the guard's calfs with my katana, and he hits the floor instantly. In a blink, I'm standing on guard next to Naruto, Sharingan spinning.

"Don't kill any, of course," As if I need to warning, Naruto. I know what could happen if we kill somebody while we're suspected of being terrorists.

"Of course," I reply with a small smirk on my face. I put the last ten minutes behind me and let the adrenaline of fighting overcome me.

Waves of guards challenge us, but we keep pushing through them hallway by hallway. Once they realize who we are, they send more skilled reinforcements. I encounter one kunoichi who manages to land a meaningless cut to my shoulder, but that's the most damage I receive in the early stages of our escape. Naruto, on the other hand, was careful to not injure anyone. Consequently, that meant that he got hit much more often than he should have. How do I know that he's going to be asking me to fix his wounds?

In one of the last hallways before we reach the exit, a large team of ANBU confronts us. The leader of the pack has on a dove mask with a lavender swirl on the forehead. His exposed skin is pale, while his long hair is just a shade lighter.

"What do you guys think you're doing?"

"Heh, sorry Neji. We got locked in a cell after we broke out Shikamaru. I had to figure a way out," Ah, it _is_ Hyuuga! Neji's an ANBU captain now? That's quite a high position for a member of the Hyuuga's branch house.

"Couldn't the Uchiha have figured out a less reckless way of doing so?" With his skill for scolding, he should have been an Academy teacher.

"He told me to leave it to him. I only listened because he wanted to spite the elders," Not to mention, I was a bit preoccupied.

"This is a Trial, Neji," Naruto reveals our actual intention, "It was ordered by Tsunade. You can let us go without getting in trouble," After sighing at dobe's antics, Hyuuga raises his mask and looks us over with his white eyes.

"I'll do you one better, Naruto-kun. Follow me," His team flanks around us, repelling any guards and protecting us from their sight. I guess having a few friends can help in some situations.

We don't split from them until we retrieve our gear from the dumpster. We had packed camping gear just in case we had to take Shikamaru and flee the country for a day or two. The alarms in the prison are always changing, so we only had a thirty-percent chance of the Reverse-Summoning scroll working.

"Tell everybody that Shikamaru is just fine, okay? Shizune found a place for him to stay until Tsunade convinces the elders to let him back in," Neji nods at him, then places a hand on his shoulder. All my muscles lock up. I can't punch him, he just helped us. I can't bloody that hand that's daring to touch my–

What the hell am I thinking?

"Stay safe, Naruto-kun."

"You too, Neji. I'll be doing much better from now on, so don't worry," His grin isn't wide, but it's much brighter than any I've seen before. Neji takes notice of this, and his eyebrow raises slightly in response, but he smiles back. Assured that Dobe isn't going to be doing anything else irrational, he leads his team back into the prison.

"Hey," I'm the only one he could be addressing, so I look to see Naruto staring at me expectantly.

"Wait until we're not right outside of the prison, idiot!"

"Can you blame me for being impatient?" No, I can't really. However, I'm not going to let him know my thoughts until we get back to our inn.

"Look, I didn't say we had to walk back to the inn," I pull out our Reverse-summoning scrolls. He hugs me as if I'd just given him a Christmas gift. I unfurl the scrolls, and we both sign them with blood. Together, we perform the jutsu that brings us back to our inn room.

The dust clears, and I'm in the most embarrassing position I've ever been in. Nothing about the room has changed, it's just the fact that I'm alone in it with Naruto.

Now I have to think quickly. He's expecting a confession of sorts, right? I'm fully aware of my own feelings, so expressing them shouldn't be too difficult. I'll just come out and say it.

But there's something that's bothered me about this since the first signs starting showing.

"Naruto?" I get it attention so I can come right out with it, "How could you possibly love me? I've tried to kill you!"

"I forgave you for that years ago, I already told you. I thought you left the past behind, Sasuke."

"I have!" This is one of those rare occasions where I carelessly say what's on my mind verbatim, "But the past is what's making you think you love me!"

He's deluded himself into believing that his protective feelings for me have more depth than that. Not to mention, he's been totally celibate throughout his teen years. Pent-up lust and misunderstood emotions are the factors that are making him love me. I can't take advantage of the dobe not knowing what he's feeling.

"Keep telling yourself that, Sasuke. I'll wait for you to realize that I've understood emotions before you even knew what feelings were," Damn it, he's not listening to me!

"Naruto, my concerns are legitimate! There's no way you-"

"There's no way I could love you? Shouldn't I be the one saying that?" What? No!

"I never said I didn't love you, usuratonkachi!" So, it's a bit round-about. It's does its job effectively enough; Naruto flies towards me and grabs my hair in both of his hands.

"Then say it! I love you!" When did this turn into a fight? My fists grip the front of his jacket and pull him in closer.

"I love you, damn it, let go of me!" Of course he doesn't, he just messily throws us down onto our futons.

"Well, now that you've decided to stop fucking around, I won't, either," His fingers find the zipper of my shirt and wrench it all the way open. Next thing to go was the headband around my neck.

"Don't get any ideas!" Nothing short of a fire would get him off of me at this point. All I can do is try to stay mute as he leaves a marks. It stay silent for a while, but I break when he pants a warm breath against where the curse-mark used to be.

"Naruto, you...moron," Naruto stops dead in his tracks. Am I doing something wrong? How could I be doing anything wrong already?

"Man, this is going to be fun!" He dissolves into nearly hysterical laughter, but he keeps his arms wrapped around me.

"What is?" He can't be talking about that, not this soon! No way in hell! I'd Amaterasu him before he got his pants off.

"Dating you, duh," The statement and the kiss that follows it do not relax me in the slightest.

"Have I said anything about that?" It might be cruel of me, but I never make a decision without thinking about it, "Actually dating might cause issues with the villagers. You might not be able to do anything even if you become Hokage. Think about things first, for once!"

"I wouldn't have done anything if I wasn't totally sure, Sasuke."

"Naruto," I lower my voice in warning. I don't tolerate rash decisions.

"Okay, teme, I get it. I'll wait for your word. But, while we're under the radar, don't let it stop you. Is that alright?" After some thought, I choose not to resist the temptation.

"Yeah. 'Under the radar' means that you can't tell anybody until I make my decision. Clear?"

"As a bell, bastard. Now take your turn!" Oh, he grumbles, but that doesn't stop the traveling hand on my bared stomach.

"For what?" Maybe he means I can take my shower first. We've been fighting in a jail, crawling through vents, and laying on the floor of a cell (in my case). It's disgusting.

"To kiss me," What? Dobe!

"That's ridiculous. Why do we have to take turns with something like that?"

"Because," He sits himself up, "We're equals!"

"That again?" I should have anticipated that he would be careful not to annoy me. If he treated me like some starry-eyed girl, I'd cut him to pieces. However, nothing is stopping me.

With my mind made up, I prop up on my elbows. With one hand buried in his hair, I pull him into an aggressive kiss to tell him just what I think about being "equals" all the time. Fingernails dig into my sides, so I fist his short hair and attack with my tongue. He gets to pull away and return once before I force him onto his back.

Since everything's in full view, I see that his dark pants are barely concealing his excitement. So that's my cue to go.

"I may not be a fan of turns, usuratonkachi, but I will take my turn in the shower," I smirk and leave him in the room. His loud curses are audible even over the running water.

Payback successful.

"That was just what I needed!" Dobe sighs in contentment and leans back to stretch and yawn. He must be as worn out as I am after all we've done.

"We should get some sleep before another Trial is thrown at us. It'll either be that or ANBU from the elders," I clear away our tea cups and plates from our lunch that I had made.

"Yeah. Either way, we can pass out until then," This isn't the greatest idea I've ever had. On his way to our bed, he pulls off his shirt. He couldn't make it more obvious that he was trying to show off his muscles to me. I may hate show-offs, but damn if it isn't working. He pats beside him after he lays down, beckoning me to join him. My apprehension and instincts root me to the floor.

"It was your idea," To sleep, yes, not being taken advantage of while doing so!

My body moves to him in spite of my mind. He smiles in triumph when I lay against his warm side.

"I intend to sleep, dobe," My warning goes unheard. Under the guise of covering us with a blanket, he gives himself and excuse to hold me closer. His lips have barely grazed mine when the door flies open.

"Can someone in here explain to me why– Oh!" Both of our taijutsu is good enough, luckily, so Tsunade didn't have time to see anything. However, it will be a bit hard to explain why neither of us have shirts and all of the marks I have. The purplish marks stand out too vividly on my skin, it's impossible for her to not see every one of them. Tsunade's blush seals it.

"Explain what?" Unison! How is it even possible that we'd say something in unison? We don't think alike at all!

"Explain, uh..." She's trying her best to keep professional, "Why I have four wanted criminals out of prison instead of one?"

"Three others got out?" It must have been simple for any intelligent criminal to break out during the pandemonium we caused, so I'm not fazed.

"Yeah. That damn Kuroni got out with the help of two ronin, all because you two half-assed your escape plan!"

"Hey, I did it intentionally! I wanted to piss the elders off."

"Well, it sure as hell worked, dumb ass!" She slams herself down into one of our chairs. That furniture doesn't look stable enough to hold up against her upper half, let alone getting a beating from her.

"So, they need to be retrieved. Will this be made into a Trial?" I can't maintain my composure with her staring at my kiss marks, so I grab a nearby shirt and throw it on.

"Yes, this will be the Rooster Trial. After this, it's just two more,"

"Hold on a minute, Tsunade," The Hokage is visibly shocked that he didn't call her "old hag", or one of his many variations of insulting names, "When did my Trials turn into clean up missions?"

"What makes you think they are?"

"You've had me go pick up Shikamaru because the elders weren't happy with him after my eighth Trial. Before that, we had to capture Kuroni, since we failed to do that in the seventh Trial. The rest of the Trials were pretty much search and destroy missions for random objects! The fifth nearly got Sasuke enslaved! How the hell does all that make me qualified to be Hokage?"

"I'll be straight-forward with you, Naruto," It's about time someone was, "I'm not absolutely certain myself why the elders made you destroy those items. However, the qualifications for what constitutes a Trial are strictly expressed in my grandfather's scroll."

"Will we be able to see this scroll?" If the elders try giving us a Trial that doesn't follow the guidelines, we might be able to revoke their authority over our Trials.

"After you get in office. Only the Hokage and appointed others can read the scroll," She waved her hand in the air, wiping an invisible slate, "It's a boring piece of work. However, I can tell you about Trials you've already done."

"I only understood the point of the Fire Ceremony. All of our other Trials didn't seem to have anything to do with the Zodiac sign, from what I saw."

"Well, you wouldn't have passed if you didn't learn the lesson each Animal was supposed to teach," I recognize her tone. It's one that many older people adopt when they're about to "bestow" knowledge upon the younger generation. Naruto and I both prepare for a long-winded speech

"Let's start with the Rat Trial. The rat is a sneaky one, so you had to learn that it is important for a shinobi to always blend in with the shadows, even in a crowded room. With your disguises and use of persuasion against Big Dealer, you passed this Trial. For your Ox Trial, you were pitted against very stubborn groups who wouldn't be so easily persuaded. An ox would teach you that anything can be solved with physical strength and strength of will. As a Hokage, you will encounter many who oppose change, but you must believe that you have the strength to make it happen," This all sounds like she's ripping it straight out of the scroll.

"Hey, maybe you can just give me a quick summary?" I have to agree with Naruto. This may be interesting to us, but neither of us learn from being lectured.

"Fine! Ungrateful brats," Will I forever be "the Uchiha brat?"

"The Tiger Trial was designed to pit you against your fears. The Rabbit Trial was supposed to strengthen your co-dependence, seeing as you will need to rely on each other as Hokage and Assistant. For the Dragon Trial, it was necessary for you to confront your biggest opposition. The Snake Trial was made to toughen you against the gruesome aspects of being in the black world of shinobi," Checking them off in my head, I run through all of our previous Trials. All of them appear legitimate, even the ones the elders assigned.

"Then you guys got to the Horse Trial with Shikamaru. Now, the main part was really to show that you were going to stay true to yourself. A Hokage can't pull a one-eighty right after getting into office! The elders, however, used it to see if you would take orders. They wanted to give you a distraction," Or, they were trying to prevent us from accomplishing that Trial's requirements.

"You still accomplished the main goal, so you ultimately passed. Shikamaru allowed you to focus on the true goal by not giving you too many orders."

"Those bastards!"

"So, they threw him in prison and took you out of the country when they did so. They took you on your Goat Trial without telling you anything. From what I've read in your report, you were very close to not passing."

"How did we, then? What did we even do? It was just a pointless capture mission."

"Once again, it goes back to a Goat's personality. They are one of the most nurturing Zodiacs, so the Trial needed an element of care-giving. If you had decided to burn the village down, regardless of what would happen to the citizens, you wouldn't have passed. Your idea of using the illusion and the hovering fire was what saved you from failure."

If the elders have been going after us at every step of the way, I don't think we can be confident about passing these last Trials easily. They've made it very clear that they do not want us in office.

"And, let me guess. The Monkey Trial had to do with cleverness, right?" I've picked up on the pattern of the other Trials after her huge speech.

"You got it. What's takes more mischievous cleverness than breaking out of prison and causing a ruckus in the process? You two passed that one quite easily. All you have now is the Rooster, the Dog, and the Pig."

"So, that means I'm going to be Hokage in four days? I get inaugurated the day after our last Trial, right?"

"Right. In fact, I already have a small group of people working on the plans for the festival."

"Sweet, I get a festival?" A party in his honor? I'm sure he'll have a field day with that. He hasn't been able to celebrate his own birthday because of his association with the Kyuubi attack. I'm not sure how he's going to handle the transition from never celebrating a birthday to having an entire festival to himself.

"Not until you get your Trials done," From the way she says it, they sound like chores instead of vital tasks we need to do in order to become the leaders of the village, "So, I think I've made your next Trial clear enough, correct?"

"Yeah. Find Kuroni and the two other criminals and bring them back."

"Alright. Off you go. I'll be at the local pub here if you need me," She shows herself to the door, but hesitates before opening it.

"One more thing. You should get those bruises checked out, Sasuke. I'm sure Sakura could help," With a knowing wink, she leaves us alone in our humiliation.

* * *

><p>"Will we have to go into the village?" For tracking, a ninja usually has to start in the target's last known location so they can get a scent or path. If we do have to go back to the prison, we'd have to use every ounce of our speed to avoid detection while they're still on red-alert. Though I can see perfectly fine in the dark, I light our only lantern so he can see me. For trackers that can move in the dark, a new moon night is the perfect time for hunting. However, it is not so good when you're trying to hold a conversation.<p>

"I doubt it. I've become a damn good sensor lately. Not only can my Kyuubi mode sense malice, my Sage mode can detect even small levels of chakra from kilometers away. There's no way they have the stamina to already be out of my range!" He's come a long way from being a one-trick pony, spamming Kage Bunshins to solve all his problems.

"Do that, then, but don't take this lightly. We weren't told anything about the other criminals that Kuroni escaped with. You have to remember that Konoha Prison is for high-profile prisoners, such as myself."

"You're right. There's no way Kuroni can put up much a fight by himself. That guy can't even walk straight, let alone throw a punch! He must've taken some big fighters with him," Naruto sits cross-legged on a mossy, fallen trunk. We're far enough north of Konoha to avoid the detection of any guards patrolling the woods.

Within a minute, red coloration encircles his closed eyes. They open, and his strange frog eyes point to the East. Once we got more exact directions, I extinguished our lantern and shoved it into my backpack. He takes the lead, jumping to each branch without needing to see them (If I understand his Sage Mode correctly, he can sense the natural energy in the trees themselves. It seems quite useful for a ninja.)

As predicted, we find them only ten kilometers out of the patrol range. They had set up camp for the night, but they failed to set up night watching shifts. No shinobi would make such a basic mistake, so I'm assuming our other opponents are mere fighters. Kuroni's a genius, albeit a drug-addled one, but he should be capable of making decent traps.

I'm too cautious to say anything to dobe, so I say it through a quick squeeze of his hand; "Be careful, don't be rash." His returning squeeze felt genuinely reassuring, so I think we're ready for anything.

Under his breath, I hear him perform Kage Bunshin, creating just two other clones. On light feet, Naruto and I approach the sleeping figures near the dying fire. I unsheath my sword, and see him take out a kunai. He counts us off with his fingers: One...two...three! Whipping off the blankets, we expose our enemies.

Logs!

Damn it, it's the replacement jutsu! I'm only given a split second to block a kick from a huge leg. The hulking mass of a man punched forth with a fist as large as my face. Bruises start forming on my hands because of my constant blocking, so I know I have to go on the offensive. After a few superficial cuts, my katana slices deep into his stomach. I stab towards his shoulder, attempting to disable his arm. I'm successful, but I'm delayed for just a moment because my sword gets stuck in the many layers of muscle this guy has. He takes that time to grab my vunerable wrist – "FUCK!"

"Sasuke!" Ten armed bunshins surge forward and overwhelm this behemoth. I switch my sword to my left and help Naruto with his own battle. His opponent flashes around Naruto, disappearing into the ground and popping out from other place entirely. Unfortunately for her, that doesn't work against Naruto. She must realize this, since she resorts to more direct attacks. She's decent, but even she knows that she can't take on both of us.

"I'm glad to see you two," What's this? Did Kuroni break out a third person?

No! Kuroni himself appears out of the woods, walking steadily and with focused eyes.

"So, are you working for the elders of your village?" When Kuroni speaks clearly, it shocks Naruto into stammering out an answer.

"I-I wouldn't say that! This is a Trial given by Tsunade," Has Naruto never learned to keep his intentions hidden?

"Why do you ask?" I'll handle the questions while Naruto pulls himself together.

"They've been abusing my work. My masks, my crystal mines, even my Golden Acorn, every one of them have been destroyed. They did that, and yet they forced me to recreate one of my associate's previous works."

"Does that have anything to do with us?"

"It may. Have either of you been to my associate's manor?" It clicks; his associate was Kemi!

"Is this about the green liquid with purple smoke that nearly killed Naruto?" Dobe jumps when he comes to the same conclusion.

"You worked with Kemi?"

"Yes, and yes," Kuroni takes my arm with the broken wrist. I don't struggle as he begins setting healing my bones, "He was Lady Chance's father, but he was much closer to me. He's who inspired me to become a medical scientist, and so we spent many hours in the lab together. That liquid was the result of our chakra research. We found that chakra deficiency was a leading cause of disease and weak immune systems in non-shinobi," Kuroni finishes his work, then moves on his huge companion.

"In order to get enough chakra into a person's system, we needed to create a container strong enough to hold what we dubbed a 'chakra flooder.' Our break through came when we discovered the crystal's powers. It lead us to creating that green liquid, along with its counterpart."

"It had a counterpart? Let me guess, it's a red liquid. We tried to find it in an old medical school," I may have been incapacitated for the most part during that Trial, but I remember the optional task.

"It wouldn't have been in my old school. I took it and my own experiments before burning it down," Well, if that's so...

"Where is it?"

"I destroyed it during one of my, ah . . ., episodes," Given the opportunity, we should find out what it's going to do to Naruto.

"Did the green stuff do anything to me?" Naruto leans back onto his hands, somehow completely relaxed even though we're talking to a monster.

"Your adverse affects when you took the medicine were cause by it targeting your Kyuubi aggressively," He wasn't nearly this articulate when he was Orochimaru's subordinate, "It's supposed to be able to attach to anything from a virus to a demon, or any unwanted entity in the body, without hurting the host."

"But it hurt like hell!"

"Yes, but from what I understand, your body is highly intermingled with your demon. Just make sure you don't let anyone take the red liquid. It's what marks the sacrifice."

"Sacrifice! I thought this was some kind of medicine!" Jolting up, Naruto latchs onto Kuroni's black prison shirt.

"It's only supposed to be a simple mouse or fish. The animal would drink the solution, which would cause the now-diseased chakra flooder to transfer over, and then it spontaneously combusts in a sterilizing fire," Now, imagine if a human was on that end.

"I can't have the Kyuubi extracted! Removing the bijuu kills the jinchuuriki!"

"For that very purpose, I had created an entirely new pair. One was supposed to be given to you, so it could attach to your Kyuubi. Instead of acting as medicine, you would be the one to explode into flames while my clone of you would get the bijuu. Fortunately, you destroyed the only batches of it I had when you went rampaging through my hide-out," I'm still questioning his moral alignment, but he hasn't given us a reason to doubt him.

"So, the elders have this red liquid now?"

"They have the notes I was forced to write. They used a gruff man with scars against me, and in my state I was too paranoid to disobey him. Despite having the notes, they won't be able to easily recreate it."

"Hey, boss?" Oh, The hulk speaks. Who knew? "Where are you taking us? You said you'd take us somewhere after you talked to these guys."

"Oh, I'm not taking you two anywhere. I'm just telling you how to get there," A flat smile pulls his lips, and his eyes cloud over, "It's Northwest of here, just twenty kilometers away. My old village will accept you with warm arms."

"Kashiwa-kun?" The woman reaches to her side and takes his hands.

"Sasuke," Kuroni addresses me, so I make eye-contact, "I see you've found a use for my katana. I was such a spoiled child when I asked for that."

"So, this is yours? Sorry, but I'm not giving it back," I holster the sword and place it on my lap, allowing him to look at the intricate sword.

"No, I don't need it. However, if it's alright, I would like to use it one last time."

"For what, boss?" His lackey raises his thick brows as I hand the sword over tentatively.

"For ending my life, and taking the research with me," He reaches in his pocket and pulls out a handful of papers. One by one, he tosses them into the fire, which flares up at the new addition. Kashiwa Kuroni, his back rigid in formality, slowly extracts the blade.

"You don't have to do this, you idiot! Just run away with these two! We'll say that you were nuts and killed these two, and that you got killed in a battle with us!"

"No, Naruto. You've seen what I've done. However, that's not the only reason I wish to die," In a ceremonial style, he raises the sword to the heavens and directs it at himself.

"Wait!" Before Naruto can stop him, I restrain his arms and allow Kuroni a chance at an honorable redemption.

"Take my head for your Trial, boys," The katana pierces his heart in a smooth motion, but he chokes out the rest of his final words.

"I refuse . . . to be used any longer!"

That night, Kashiwa Kuroni's funeral pyre was tended to by four vastly different souls.

* * *

><p>Yay! A Sasuke chapter that's actually long, and not too quickly paced! Plus, I think I got enough of my subplot in here to be happy. Sorry it's a night late, a history test snuck up on me, along with horrid allergies.<p>

Sweet Caroline starting playing after Sasuke and Naruto say "I love you". Haaaaand, touching haaand, reaching ouuut, touching meeee, tou-ching youuuuu! It was perfect XP

BTW, here I am addressing one of my personal pet peeves. Now, not everybody shares this one, I know, but it bothers me! The people will get together and THEN realize that they have some reservations. People, bring those out on the table first XP Also, I hate when Naruto and Sasuke confess, but you have to suffer through an awkward chapter or two of them touching for like two seconds and then one of them being unsure. Sasuke may have his doubts, but that doesn't stop his desire for Naruto from taking control! Another pet peeve of mine, as you might have noticed by now, are travel sequences that aren't relevant, ones that are just used to add pages.


	13. Dog Trial: Loyalty

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, and I've never been a gay man XP Seme lesbian, close enough! Also, please try to ignore typos. I nearly made Naruto sound like a pirate "Against me skin!" Arggh!

**I HAVE 100 REVIEWS YAYYYYYYYYY! Cyber popcorn, loves, and hugs to everyone who's read this far! As a reward, here's some strong-ass lime! Of course, it's in my own style XP**

**I hope you enjoy my 13th Trials chapter (it's one of my lucky numbers)**

* * *

><p><em>Trial 12: Loyalty<em>

"I know it was honorable, Sasuke, but-"

"It was the only option for such a dishonorable man," That's a bit harsh, teme! Though, he is taking good care of Kuroni's severed head.

"Still," I sigh in defeat, knowing that I actually agree with him, "He was just another one controlled by Orochimaru," Like you, I wanted to add.

"Naruto," After tying up the sack that he slid the head in, he took a light hold of my collar, "About that. It's impossible for it to happen again, so you can relax."

Yeah, I guess I can.

With the kiss that I give Sasuke, I start letting the past drop out of my own worries. I mean, I thought Sasuke was the one who couldn't let go, but all that shit flooded back to me._ 'Now that I have him, what could take him away?' _I can't count how many times that thought popped into my head since the Trials began. Not anymore! I'm too happy with things to be hypocritical.

"Hey, I owe you a skip. I'll take Kuroni to the elders, you can head back to the inn," I reach for the sack, only to have him move it away from me.

"There is no way in hell that I will leave you alone with them," I love how he can say protective things so matter-of-factly, just like me!

"But I still owe you, teme," It might be nerves from what I just saw, but I feel the need to lighten the mood. What's better than some harmless flirting for doing that? So, with flirting mode activated, I slipped around his waist and put a hand in the curve of his back.

"Fine, then pick something else," Perfect opening for me, Sasuke, lemme just take it.

"Well, what do you have in mind?" Nicely-executed, self! The smirk and one-eyebrow raise were nice touches. Hell, Sasuke's even blushing a bit!

"I don't have anything in particular, dobe. I don't care much anymore about it, anyway," Like always, he's trying to ruin my fun. Too bad, he's still leaving himself wide open.

"Then leave it to me. Heh, I think I have something in mind," It takes all I have to not laugh my ass off at Sasuke's confused expression.

"Ano...," Oh, he's catching himself! "Hn," That was a close one; Sasuke nearly lost his ability to stay stoic twenty-four/seven.

"Until then, let's give our dear elders a present," My heavy sarcasm did shit to conceal how pissed off I am at them. If our message at the prison wasn't loud enough, maybe a severed head will get across to them!

* * *

><p>We're let right into the meeting room, no questions asked. Nobody cared that we were sent out to find three criminals and came back with none. No, all of their eyes seemed to be transfixed on the dripping, bloody sack.<p>

"That looks promising, but too small for three targets," Koharu eyed the blood puddle forming on the spotless tatami mats.

"Yes, it's just the one," Yanking it out of the bag, Sasuke chucked the head onto the table in front of them. It splatters blood all over their clothes and faces.

"Ugh!" Koharu screams, and motions for a guard to take the head.

"That was Kuroni," Mitokado's trying really hard to get the blood to stop smearing around his glasses, but he's failing hard, "What about the others?"

"They won't be joining us. Kuroni killed both of them before we got there," So far, our cover story is working pretty well. We hadn't talked it out too much with Kuroni's weird-ass accomplices, but we had agreed to say that they were dead.

"If they were dead, why don't we have their heads as proof?"

"There were no heads left, or bodies for that matter. We gathered that Kuroni had turned cannibal. We found bone shards in the fire pit, so it seems that he smashed everything and burned it. We have those, if you wish to see," Sasuke takes some of Kuroni's charred remains out of a smaller sack and pours it onto the table.

"You may not have been aware, but Kuroni was detoxified well before his escape. It is unlikely that he would have lost control like that.

"That would explain the pile of mushrooms at his camp!" Sometimes, I'm damn good at thinking on my feet.

"He was under the influence of hallucinogenic mushrooms?" Mitokado nods slowly and turns to Koharu, "Well? They brought back Kuroni's head and the bones of the other two. This Trial focused on having the ability and confidence to track down and nullify a threat. Do you agree that they accomplished this?"

Koharu takes her time, glaring at each of us individually. I'll admit, our story sounds a bit hokey, but our "evidence" should be good enough to even convince this bitch that they're all dead!

"Before I say your result, did either of you see any papers with Kuroni? They would have formulas on them," Even now, she's trying to use him! Not gonna happen, lady!

"He probably used them as kindling so he could burn his accomplices. Can you get on with this? We want time to clean up before we get the Dog Trial," Maybe if I play up my impatience enough, they'll let us get the hell out of here before they realize we're lying out our asses.

"Alright. Somehow, you managed to make it through eleven Trials. Congratulations," If that was any more "sincere", her nose would have grown.

"Great! We'll be waiting for the next Trial,"

"With bated breath, we assure you," Finishing each other's sentences? Those girly romance movies aren't bullshitting when they say that lovers do that kind of fluffy stuff. I think Sasuke noticed it, too, since he clenched his fists after he completed my thought, (granted, I don't think I would've said it as nicely as he put it.)

Given the chance, we skedaddle out of there, which was surprising since Uchihas don't do anything but strut. Instead of being able to make it home, though, we run straight into Sakura when we leave the Hokage tower. Literally. All the books and scrolls she was carrying spilled and opened all over the dirt road.

"Baka Naruto! Why were you rushing like that!" She gets down to pick up her things, and both of us bend to help her.

"Hey~!" I whine (I'm not proud about it) just a teeny bit, "Why am I the only baka? Sasuke ran into you, too!"

"Dobe, I don't run into people. I run through them," That's not a threat to me, right, Sasuke?

"Gimme those," She grabs all of the scrolls and books from us, "You guys are lucky that I'm in a good mood."

"Why's that?" For once, Sasuke doesn't sound totally disinterested in how she's doing. I'll just add that to the long list of improvements I've noticed in Sasuke since I confessed! It'll go right above "Has regained the ability to laugh" and below "Doesn't constantly have his eyebrows furrowed."

"Well, if you really wanna know," She blushes and scratches her cheek, "I'm...seeing someone."

"I know that face!" I go to hug her, but things get awkward when I have to get around the big stack of books, so I just squeeze her shoulder, "So, who is he, just so I know who to punch if he hurts you?" Sakura gets my joke and grins back at me.

"Don't punch him, you idiot! You can trust Sai," Him. Seriously? SAI!

"How in the hell did that happen!"

"Sorry if you didn't notice, Naruto, but you were out training all the time. Sai and I got close when you were training to save Sasuke. Plus, we had a lot of time during the war and you went off training after that, too!" Man, I didn't mean to make her get defensive.

"You two probably make a good match. Just make sure you keep him in check. He seems a bit . . .vulgar," Sasuke shifts his weight to his other leg and crosses his arms. Fine, if he's not gonna come right out and say it, I will.

"He probably has no idea how relationships work. Keep him out of your pants until he does, alright?"

"Dumb ass!" Sakura freaks and punches me over the head with books, "I can take care of myself!" Stars, they're so pretty...Ah! Snap out of it! It was just a whack to the head, even if it was from one of the strongest kunoichi I know.

"Now, if you don't mind, I have to get these to Tsunade!" She huffs, but I see her smiling as she prances off.

"Yo, Sasuke? Why didn't we mention that we're together?"

"I already told you, dobe. I'm still debating."

"Are you 'debating' being with me when you shove your tongue in my mouth?"

"I never 'shove' anything, usuratonkachi! Are you trying to imply that I don't know what I'm doing?"

"I'm just teasing, Saucykins. I fully enjoy kissing you," Perhaps the cutesy nickname was going too far?

"Fuck you!" You're a liar, Sasuke! You said you don't shove anything, but you just shoved your elbow into my stomach.

"Bas- Bastard!" I nearly cough up my guts and spit them out. As much as it hurts, I don't really feel like hitting him back. If I wasn't trying to convince him to be my boyfriend, I would've gladly rearranged his pretty face.

"You shouldn't have called me something so stupid. From now on, no nicknames." Oh, come on!

"What? But, what if I want to call you Teme?" I straighten up and wipe my mouth so I can give my best puppy-dog pout.

"That's a given, dobe," Don't roll your eyes, Sasuke, you know my stare is working.

"Alright, then what about normal pet names, like baby or sexy?"

"Do you know how ridiculous you sound?" Damn, he's right. Sexy doesn't really roll off the tongue, and it's a bit obvious. "Baby" sounds like I'm a pedo, but Sasuke's not a little brat.

"Deal," I almost lean in to kiss him, but then I notice that we're being stared at by some villagers. Yeah, I don't think Konoha's main street would be the greatest place to start making out.

I'll just have to wait until we get back to the inn!

* * *

><p>Target spotted. . . approaching slowly so it isn't disturbed.<p>

Initiate capture sequence!

"Gotcha!" It takes some struggling, but I get the target pinned against the wall.

"Dobe, don't jump me when I'm in the kitchen! I nearly burned my hand!" He stops complaining when I grab the backs of his thighs and sweep him off his feet.

Anyone else would be called crazy if they let Sasuke's deadly legs wrap around their waist. It would be like letting a boa constrictor be your scarf.

"Oh, come on. The kitchen is attached to the living room, which is technically our bedroom, so it's legit," Methinks he likes it when I purr. Just a guess.

"Shut up," This would be a great time to say "Make me!", but he's way ahead of me. Kissing Sasuke is coming natural to me, since it's like sparring, but with tongues. If I think about it that way, my adrenaline starts spiking as if we're using our fists instead of our lips. I know damn well which I prefer!

If he lets me get this far, I wonder what he'd do if I went any further. Meh, I wanna do what I wanna do, so I might as well do it. I push into the kiss with my entire body, allowing my hands to slip back further on his legs.

Damn, I thought I was kidding all those times I called Sasuke a tight ass.

If Sasuke doesn't get any control back, he'll probably start getting annoyed, so I tilt my head to the side. He accepts the invite, but way more than I thought.

"Let go...for a second," I'm a bit distracted by his crazy-hot voice, but I take my hands off him. Without fumbling or slipping off me, he pulls off my jacket and fishnet armor. Since he started it, I unzip and throw Sasuke's shirt across the room. I slide my hands under his thighs and get them back to where they belong. I try looking into his eyes, but my cocky grin falters when I take in the sight.

I've seen some sexual things, but Idon't know a damn thing that can beat a turned-on Sasuke. Especially one that's shirtless, but still has on his high, black arm guards. The headband around his neck is a great touch, but it's in my way, so it gets untied and tossed to the floor.

Our skin feels like we're just degrees away from bursting into flames, but we still want to get closer. My eyes skim down from his spinning Sharingan to watch his parted lips. As if he knows I'm looking, he bites his lower lip and slowly lets it go. I can't help myself, I have to lean in and do the same to him. Thing is, I'm not done looking, so I pull away after a couple kisses and bites to glance over his chest. It already has a light sheen of sweat which highlights every bit of definition he has. It raises and lowers along with Sasuke's light panting. But, as nice as it is, I'm more interested in his hardened nipples, so I latch onto one of them. Sasuke hisses when I suck roughly, and again when my nails dig into flesh through his pants.

Without thinking, my hips buck forward and meet Sasuke's. Oh, Fuckin' A, I don't even bother holding in my moan when Sasuke pushes himself even closer. Neither of us see any point in stopping, so it becomes a battle of tongues and hips; and, since he's the one pinned with his legs spread, I know I'll win this one.

The bucking and rubbing and licking and kissing and panting all blurs together as our rhythm quickens. Sasuke, gasping for breath between kisses and grasping at my hair, starts breaking the pace we had set. He's biting my neck a lot more, so my movements also become erratic, until we're both just thrusting wildly into each other. I'm almost at my limit, just a few more seconds...

Then again, that's all it takes for some asshole to knock on the fucking door!

"Excuse me, Uzumaki-san! I have a scroll for you!" Man, it's the innkeeper, so it's not even someone I can beat the living shit out of for interrupting!

Reluctantly, I let Sasuke go. He growls at the door before closing himself into the bathroom. I throw on my jacket to cover my marks and raging hard-on from the poor old innkeeper lady.

"Thank you," I flash my brightest, shit-eating grin, "I never caught your name, ma'am?"

"Oh!" She hands me the scroll, "I'm Ryou Tei," She bows deeply to introduce herself.

"I know you know, but I'm Uzumaki Naruto. You have a really beautiful inn. I'll always remember it. Thank you again," I bow to her, and she rushes back down the hall to take care of some other guests.

"Alright Sasuke, you can come out now," I shut the door before opening up the scroll for our next Trial.

"So, what does it say?" Sasuke avoids looking at me as he goes to finally use the stove.

"We got lucky, it's from Tsunade. She says in here that since this is the Dog Trial, and dogs represent loyalty, that-," I can't say the rest of the line. Why would she do this to me, huh?

"I can choose whether or not you become Hokage," Of all the times to read over my shoulder, Sasuke chooses the worst!

"Sasuke, I know what this says, but think about things first!"

"If I should revoke your ability to become Hokage," He takes a step back, "I must become Hokage instead."

"I understand that you could do a lot for your clan with this kind of power, but just know that I, well," I rethink things, trying to see it in Sasuke's point of view. He does have better judgement than I do. What if he thinks that I'm simply not fit to become Hokage? Out of everybody, Sasuke would be the one to know if I would be a good leader. In that case...

"I will support whatever decision you make," I've got a preference, but it's in Sasuke's hands.

"Dobe," He takes the scroll out of my hands and tosses it onto the table, "Don't be ridiculous. This seems like a standard part of the Trials. I'm sure your father's Assistant was given the same offer. For me, it's a simple choice."

"You don't think they're targeting you?" That's just the kind of thing I would expect from those elders.

"If they are, their aim is way off. I have no desire to take away your dream. An Uchiha becoming Hokage would start this entire cycle over again," I laugh in relief. I know I shouldn't have worried so much. Sasuke as Hokage? Yeah, sure, and I'd make a good celibate monk!

"Simple as that, huh?" Take that, Trials! This team runs on loyalty!

"Yeah. The First Hokage was smart to give the opportunity for mutiny, but I doubt he considered the scenario of the Hokage and Assistant being . . ._involved _with each other," Fuckin' A, Sasuke, is it that hard to admit it? Stop being such a frustration bastard!

"Makes sense. Now, that wasn't the entire Trial, teme," He's wandering off to get the tea off of the stove, so I make sure he isn't just ignoring me out of bastard principles.

"I figured as much, dobe. Tea?" I nod, so he takes out two tea cups and fills them up. Together, we spread out the scroll and read it while drinking our tea. The two don't mix well, and I nearly spew all of my tea over Sasuke and the scroll.

"Damn it! The rest is from the elders. It says that we're supposed to kidnap scientists!" I sputter as hot tea flies back into my throat.

"From our own country?" Sasuke snatches the scroll to read the rest, "No, from Suna!"

"But Gaara and his country, they're our allies! Why the hell would the elders risk ruining that?"

"Perhaps they aren't," Sasuke sets his cup down and leans back, furrowing his brow, "It seems that it's up to us. We absolutely can't fail."

"Of course we can't! Gaara would eat us from the inside out if we tried to fuck with his people. He's one of my best friends, but he wouldn't even take that shit from me!" What kind of bullshit is this! Those elders know damn well that this is the opposite of how a Hokage would act!

Hey, wait a minute. That's it! I think I got it!

* * *

><p>"Can you please explain to me why we're risking the entire Shinobi Alliance? The elders don't know what they're doing," Sasuke growls at me as we trot through the Wind Country's desert. It's not wickedly hot since the sun is going down, but I'm still not bothering to wear my jacket.<p>

"We're not risking anything, Sasuke. We're not even sneaking into the village."

"Naruto, I know you've never kidnapped anybody, but it works in the same way as an assassination. As in, you don't want to be seen!" Yeah, yeah, I know that! Just relax for a second!

"I'm doing what I would do as Hokage!" There's no way I would ever want to be Gaara's enemy. I'm sure my plan will work.

Sasuke merely sighs and smacks the back of my head "for being an idiot."

Sunagakure comes into view quickly, and just in time for it to be night. It's the perfect time to come see Gaara.

"Won't he be asleep?"

"Probably not," I think back on a conversation I had with Gaara soon after the war, "He told me that he got into the habit of not sleeping. Turns out, sleep isn't totally required for you to survive! When he's feeling annoyed, he sleeps for a couple hours."

"So, without Shukaku driving him insane, he became a night owl? And we're simply approaching him?"

"Yeah! Ya see, a Hokage is supposed to be a diplomat. I'm sure that we can reason enough with Gaara that he'll give us the scientists we need!"

Scanning the rooftops, I try to find the silhouette of the Kazekage. It's not long before I spot him on top of the Kazekage tower. We set off in his direction, but we're halted by guards. They recognize us, but we have to prove who we are. Sasuke only has to show his eyes, and I go into Kyuubi mode and do a fingertip Rasengan. Bowing, they let us into the village.

We take to the rooftops, and finally land on the round roof of the tower that's overlooking the balcony.

"Long time, no see!" I keep to a dull roar to be polite. It is night time, after all!

"I thought I saw something orange running towards me," Gaara turns and waves us down from the roof, "And you brought Sasuke."

"Yeah, about that; I don't know if you've heard the news, but I'm going through these things called Trials. If I complete all of them, I'll become the Hokage! Sasuke's helping me because he's going to become my Assistant," Might as well give him the full explanation before jumping into business.

"It's about time, Naruto. It would be nice for there to be a Kage even younger than I am," Hey, I think No-Brows just teased me!

"Hey, you know I'll do a good job! It doesn't matter that I'm young, I've got Sasuke to be the mature one," I nudge Sasuke with my shoulder, which helps both of us relax.

Gaara takes off the Kage hat and lets it hang down his back. The white robes that he's wearing are very similar to the ones I'll be wearing soon, except that his color is green and mine will be red. It was always strange to me that they would make wind be green, but I guess they can't be a weird color, like gray or something.

"How are you, Sasuke?" I don't know what it is about the question, but it gets me really nervous. I mean, Gaara was never really clear on how he feels about Sasuke. At one point, I thought he wanted Sasuke dead in order to protect me, but everything became weird after Sasuke helped us kill Kabuto and Madara. I just don't know what's going on in his head!

"Recently, I've been much better since the last time we met."

"Thanks to Naruto, right?" Gaara doesn't change his expression when Sasuke lowers his head.

"I know. What you said in the Iron Country was right, I just wish I could have seen that," What's this? Oh, right! Gaara said something about how Sasuke was in the darkness or whatever, but I didn't know that meant they talked back then.

"Better late than never, Sasuke. Personally, I'm glad things worked out so well, for Naruto's sake," Since my name is mentioned, it's as good a time as any to jump in.

"Heh, thanks, Gaara. I owe you so much already, but I still need to ask you for more. It's for my current Trial."

"I can do anything within reason," Spoken like a true Kazekage. I should take notes from him for how a Kage should act. So far, I've gathered that they're really protective, and yet they can keep a cool head. So far, I can do one out of the two. Lemme try the second one right now, since I have to ask the main question

"Okay, then. You see, our elders need special scientists for a project. I wasn't given all of the details on it, but we'd really appreciate it if you would ask Hakushi-sensei and Kouba-sensei if they would come help in Konoha."

"Those are two of my highest-ranking doctors. Hakushi-sensei and Kouba-sensei are still very busy with war recovery. Many of the villagers sustained long-lasting injuries or need therapy for lost limbs. It would be very inconvenient for them to leave right now,"

"What if we reimbursed them and sent Sakura to help here? The last time we saw her, she was delivering papers to Tsunade. I'm certain that Shizune could cover for her if she agrees to come here."

"Sakura's abilities would be very useful here," Gaara sighs and looks at one of the guards by the door. He comes over quickly and bows down onto one knee, standard shinobi style.

"Gijou-san, please go to the hospital and tell Hakushi-sensei and Kouba-sensei to report to me," The guard, Gijou, jumps up immediately and takes to the rooftops in the direction of Suna's large hospital.

"Does that mean we have a deal, 'Kazekage-sama?'" Gaara's the only person I know who doesn't roll his eyes at me when I tease them.

"You and I do, but you have to wait for their word. If they agree, allow them an hour to pack. It would be better if you travel at night through the desert."

"No kidding! I nearly turned into a puddle on the way here!" I fan myself dramatically, but Sasuke swats my hand down.

"You were the one trying to sprint all the way there."

"What? I was getting bored with looking at sand!"

"Dobe."

"Well, I see you two haven't lost a beat, despite everything that happened these past years," Come on, Gaara. You know that Sasuke and I can't help but act this way.

"I can't say that we've gone back to how we used to be, but that's a good thing," Phew! For a second there, I thought Sasuke was about to confess about our relationship to Gaara!

"Yes, I suppose being in love with each other is an improvement," Fuckin' A!

"W-what? How did you – Are you implying – I mean, how the hell?" Words are too hard to use properly when you're stumbling to figure out what was said.

"What gave us away so easily?"

"I made a few observations, and then layered in what I already know about your interactions. I wasn't sure until you started bantering, but you made it pretty obvious."

"Alright, fine. It's not like I wanted to keep it a secret, anyway," I swear, I intend on telling Sakura when we see her!

"It's not official yet," Buzz-kill, Sasuke.

"For no goddamn reason!" Telling our friends that we're dating is supposed to be fun! It's not supposed to turn into a debate.

"I'm sure you two will figure those things out. For now, the doctors are here," He's right; One woman and one man, both wearing white coats, are escorted onto the balcony by Gijou.

"This is Hakushi-sensei," Gaara introduces the short, old man. He bows to us, then looks over us both with kind eyes.

"And this is Kouba-sensei," The tall, red-headed woman bows also, then smiles at us.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Uzumaki Naruto, and this is Uchiha Sasuke,"

"Yes, we certainly know who you two are. We heard that this was about some business in Konoha?" Hakushi answers us, and Sasuke takes his turn with stating our offer. Once he does, the two doctors only need a moment to consider it.

"Many of our patients would benefit from some fresh eyes taking a look over their conditions. We'd be happy to have Sakura replace us in exchange for our services."

"You'll also be paid by the Hokage for your time," How about that, I'm not so bad at being polite to people. Then again, I wasn't every a total asshole.

"It's settled, then. We'll be ready soon, and we can meet at the gates," Kouba's words are clipped, but not rude-sounding. If she was a billion years older, she would sound like a nicer Koharu.

"Thank you again!" I say that to both the doctors and Gaara. When the doctors leave, I also give him a big hug and a promise to see him again soon.

* * *

><p>After only twenty minutes, the doctors are ready to go. We travel through the desert for a good two hours, but weather decides to be a bitch. Visibility is nearly at zero with all the sand that's blowing around, so we're holding onto each other's arms.<p>

"It's a sandstorm! We have to find cover! Naruto-san, Sasuke-san, can you find a cave or a sand bunker?"

"There's no seeing through this. We'll just have to make a bunker!" I make Sasuke grab on to both of the doctors so I can make Kage Bunshins. Armed with kunai, a thousand clones make quick work of digging into the sand fast enough to create a bunker. It's high enough to cover our heads if we're sitting down, so everyone jumps into it. Before following, I release all of my clones.

"Ah, much better!" Kouba shakes sand out of her hair. Hakushi doesn't have any hair to shake sand out of, unless it's the ones coming out of his nose.

"This storm doesn't show any signs of letting up. It looks like we have to stay here for the night," Sasuke has a point, but the doctors don't have to look so pleased!

"That sounds fine. Get some sleep, you two, we have a long walk tomorrow, and it'll be a quick one. We might have to even carry you. If we don't get you back before noon, we fail the Trial."

"What was that? You need a file?" No kidding, this storm is deafening!

"Nevermind!" I yell, "Get to sleep!"

"Okay!" Both of them respond to me. Using their bags as pillows, they fall asleep almost instantly, despite the raging sand above them. Seriously, these doctors need to get out more if just a little walk like that wiped them out!

"You know, we're going to owe Sakura a lot for this," Man, I hadn't even thought about that!

"Whatever, she knows I'm good for it! I always pay back people if I owe them!" Now that I say that, it's a bit of a lie.

I still owe Sasuke, and this time, we can't possibly be interrupted. Over this storm, we can't even be heard! Sasuke backs as far away from me as the bunker would allow, probably because I'm grinning pervertedly.

"Naruto?" I'm glad my ears are good, or else I'd have to just read his lips. Then again, it's really hard to read lips when you're making out.

"Ugh, dobe, you're getting sand in my teeth," Sure enough, I keep hearing little rocks being ground up in my mouth. I spit a few times and get some water from my flask. He takes it from me once I'm done. Now sand-free, I grab the back of his head and push him into me. While he's taking control by exploring my mouth, I try to come up with a good way to pay him back. I need something that he will never forget. Kissing we've done, grinding we've done. But wait, we've done that, and yet I've never done one vital thing.

I haven't actually seen his cock. Not even once. What the hell kind of gay guy am I?

According to the magazine I read, I have two choices: handjob or blowjob. To be honest, I'd usually go for handjob first, but Sasuke would kick my ass the second any sand got there. I look down and see that both of my hands are absolutely covered with sand. Well, this'll be interesting, then!

"Hey, Sasuke," I speak into his ear, since I know he wouldn't be able to hear a whisper, "I know how to pay you back," It shouldn't really count, since I'm going to have fun with this, too. I doubt he'll complain about it.

One of Sasuke's eyebrows raise up, but as soon as my hand gets on his waistband, both of them try to fling themselves into his bangs.

Right, I'll probably have to get him going before doing anything drastic. Letting lust take over entirely, I unzip and rip off his shirt and headband, once again leaving him with only his armguards. I like how the leather looks and feels on Sasuke, so if it were up to me, he'd never have them off.

With his skin exposed, I'm able to lick and suck at whatever I want. Even if Sasuke would want to do anything to me, he wouldn't find any time between all my advances. At some point, he figures out that he can just lean back and enjoy the attention. His body follows the rhythm of my movements, and I wait for my final cue.

"Ngh, Naruto," The moan heats my ear, then the rest of my body follows suit. Even if I wanted to wait for a better moment, I don't think my libido would let me. I catch his lips and kiss him while my hands work at his pants. Good! It actually has a zipper. I never realized that, but it comes in handy here. I make sure that I don't have any sand on my hands before I reach in. Sasuke squirms once he feels what I'm doing, but that's the only protest he gives. His fists don't stop clenching at my shirt, so that may be his silent go-ahead.

When I finally wrap my fingers around him, my thoughts break like a skipping song. He's so, just so, everything! And he's all that and even more, now that I can actually see his cock in my hand and out of his pants.

This can't be too hard, right? The magazine said something about treating it like an ice cream cone or whatever. Really, I can't think about a good strategy for this. Seriously, I don't think you're supposed to have one when you're about to suck off an Uchiha.

Kissing him calms my nerves, so I leave a trail of them down his chest. Sasuke catches onto my plan when I grip his hips to keep them steady.

"Wha-what?" I can't really explain to Sasuke what I'm about to do, so I decide to show him. As confidently as possible, I run my tongue over the very tip. As soon as I dip into the slit, Sasuke's clenches my hair. He intends to pull me away, but I'm too fast for him. Licking and sucking his head isn't that complicated, really, and it has Sasuke making all the sounds I love to hear. When I start feeling comfortable, I take more of his cock into my mouth.

It's a lot easier than a crow and a frog, but not by much. As an added bonus, his salty skin tastes much better than those things.

I'm not going to let him cum before I get to tease him a bit. His hands have been following my head up and down, but he hasn't done anything more. So, I let my lips come off with a light pop, then I look up at Sasuke. His eyes fly open when he feels that I stopped, and they stare into mine. Keeping the eye-contact, I lower my mouth towards him. I go as frustratingly slow as possible. Closer, closer...

Until he finally just shoves me down. Luckily, I'm prepared, so I don't choke on him. Sasuke seems to like this arrangement, since he's pulling and pushing my hair as he pleases. I shut my eyes and go along, letting my tongue and lips play around him. Sasuke's hips struggle against my hands, but I keep them down firmly as I experiment a bit. After running my tongue from base to tip, I end up lapping up pre-cum.

"Haa!" He's close, I can sense it. All I have to do is suck and lick and kiss and lap, rinse and repeat.

I wish I would've been looking at him when he came, but the sheer force of it kept my attention to his cock. More specifically, I was too busy trying to keep all of his cum in my mouth so we don't get messy. I don't leave it in my mouth long enough to really say what it tastes like, but it's not bad at all. I easily swallow it down and clean my mouth off before Sasuke regains any sort of composure. I sort him out and zip his pants back up, and he doesn't even make a sound. Heh, I'm better at this than I thought.

"So, was that good enough payback?"

* * *

><p>AN: I think it's just how little I use the word, but I'm not the biggest fan of the word "nipples" XP

I haven't been asked about it, and I'm surprised. The question would be "Why doesn't Naruto's point of view every have him saying Dattebayo, or 'ttebayo, or even Believe It?" The answer is: You can fill them in yourselves, but I am not writing out every single time he would add dattebayo, because it would literally be at the end of each of my sentences. You all have heard his voice, just read the story in his voice and you'll hear it. I prefer subbed btw, if you haven't noticed.

A big pet peeve of mine? Unsupported side ships. For me, SaiSaku is supported more by the anime, but the manga has some good moments and facts for these two. He's the best of both worlds for her, since he's got those Sasuke-looks that she craves, and a very mature outlook on matters, but he has a playful and naïve side like Naruto. I see him as someone that Sakura could rely on for support, and yet be able to help with her own intelligence. She'd be definitely more appreciated, I think. Also, Naruto's obsession with Sasuke made it so that Naruto was always training apart from Sai and Sakura, so those two members of Team 7 had more time to get to know each other.

Plus, if you notice Sai's story throughout the manga, it seems that Sakura has always been highly focused in it. She approached him about his art, he calls her "hag" or "bitch", she kicks his ass if he says anything mean, and he approached her about how she's hurting Naruto. Plus, there was that nice moment in the library. She's the one that wanted to give him a chance, and Naruto was the one who wanted the real Sasuke, not some replacement. I think that just sums up the Team 7 dynamics right there.

Just think: If Sai figures out what love is and how to be in it, who do you think he'd consider first?

Yeah, so I figured it was okay to slip that in. If you prefer LeeSaku, I really have no problem for you substituting him in there. I actually think that pairing has a touch of legitimacy, too.


	14. Pig Trial: Succession

_A/N: _Well, here it is. My final Trial, but not my final chapter. This also marks the beginning of my switch-around! What does that mean, you ask? Well, since I didn't want to shove in a pointless chapter or extra Trial, _**I'm switching the order of the perspectives. Yes, that means this chapter will be in Naruto's perspective again**_, while the next will be Sasuke, and the pattern continues from there. No, I w on't have double Sasuke chapters, it just doesn't fit anywhere, heh...Don't eat me 0-0

DisclaimerIdon'townNarutostuffwhateverbiteme

I hope you liked the Trials part of the Trials as much as I did, but don't think that you can just forget them once they're done!

* * *

><p><em>Final Trial: Succession<em>

Sasuke recovers way too fast, in my opinion. Luckily, I'm in the clear! Before he can open his mouth and rant at me about whatever he can think of, I shushed him with a finger and pointed to the doctors. He huffs and glares at me while I pretend to fall asleep for a couple hours. Once that's over with, and the doctors wake up, we're able to start the rest of the walk back to Konoha.

"You know, Sasuke," I squeeze his shoulder as we walk through the clear desert, "If you want to look angry, try to stop blushing."

"I'm going to kill you!" He growls low enough that he doesn't attract the doctors' attentions, "What the hell were you thinking?"

"Mmm, maybe if I lick here, I think he liked that-" Shit, Sasuke! I think...Yeah! My lip's bleeding, you bastard!

"Don't knock me out, Teme! You're the one who'll have to haul my ass across this desert!"

"I'll leave you for the vultures!"

"What are you so mad for? You weren't complaining this much when you were shoving my head down," I lick my lips, which does draw his attention, but he's obviously pissed that something so small affected him.

"Shut up!" He shakes his head and yells at me again, but I can hear the tell-tale strain in his voice.

Well, I'm starting to follow his pattern now, since it works off of mine. He's protecting himself against my teasing by being an indignant asshole! We have fun, he gets weird, I tease, he get pissed off. Knowing that, it should be pretty easy to derail him and stop him from getting any more worked up.

"Hey, I'm not going to apologize, you know," I keep my eyes on him until he makes eye contact and keeps it.

"Tch!" He tries to insult me again, but I swoop in with "The Line."

"I couldn't help myself. I want you, Sasuke," I know I have him when his eyes widen at my heated stare. Nothing works better than being straight-forward with someone as emotionally skittish as Sasuke. And since I'm possessive of him, I'll let him know it.

"You idiot," He breaks away from me, shoves his hands in his pocket and walks a few steps ahead. "Don't be so public about it, then."

I don't know why the girls always thought you were so dark and mysterious, Sasuke. You're really easy to figure out!

"Naruto-dono," Oh, now I'm _dono_ to them? "How soon will we be arriving in Konoha?"

"Just another hour yet, why?" I look at Kouba, who's blushing fiercely, "What's wrong?"

"I...have to go to the bathroom," Well, I never expected them to have shinobi-like steel bladders!

"It's your lucky day, then. We're in a forest, if ya haven't noticed," I gesture to the woods around us, "Pick a tree, any tree, just try to avoid the ones with poison!"

She scrunches up her nose, which looks kinda cute, though Sasuke does it a lot better. I get the drift of her disgust. It's not easy for civilians to get used to the "finer" points of being a ninja.

"Hey, it's either that or be covered in piss when you walk in to take Sakura's place. I think we all know the least embarrassing choice, right?" I pat Kouba on the back and push her gently towards the trees, "Don't worry, we'll make sure old Hakushi doesn't peek!"

"Like hell I would!" Damn, fiesty old guys are always awesome!

"Suit yourself, doc! I won't try to corrupt the elderly," Sasuke catches the implication and glares at me. No, I tell him through a shake of my head, I don't want to look at that chick take a leak. I don't know what creep would want to watch someone do that.

Ah, actually, it sounds like something that the younger Sakura would've done to Sasuke. My bad!

* * *

><p>With bathroom breaks out of the way, we're free to lead our pack into Konoha. We have to double-check the scroll to see where the hell these doctors need to go first. It orders us to take the "captives" to the elders. Poor medics...<p>

Look on the bright side, at least they'll be able to treat the nausea they'll get after seeing those assholes!

Making it clear that they aren't captured, Sasuke and I lead a few steps ahead of them. Sure, we're still getting looks from the villagers, but they can't even start to know how much I've changed since the last time I saw them. I would tell them to suck my dick, but that's not unpleasant enough to be a punishment for their bitching. So instead, I'll just ignore them until I get to directly address their problem with us.

"Do you think that we'll fail for using diplomacy instead of force?" Hey, I deserve to be a bit nervous. I'm too fucking close to becoming Hokage for this to screw me over!

"You never know with these elders, but I'm sure your decision was right. This Trial was based on the "trust" concept, so you can easily assume that it was supposed to focus on alliances. If we were supposed to betray our allies, it would have contradicted our Trial," Sometimes, I'm really glad that Sasuke over-thinks everything.

Despite our certainty, all bets are off when we finally walk into the meeting room. We have the "lovely" Koharu, doing her imitation of a shaved cat, and then the ever-stodgy Mitokado! My two favorite people, grumpily drinking tea behind their second replacement table (Or third? I've lost track of how many times they pissed me off by now) and eyeing us up.

"Special delivery!" I make a huge gesture, uncovering and presenting the unshackled "captives.

"You've kidnapped Kouba-sensei and Hakushi-sensei?"

"Sure, if that means asking the Kazekage to switch these two for Sakura. It has a different name, something like diplomacy, or "not being a douche-nozzle," though I understand if you don't understand either of those terms," I don't know what's gotten me going on the whole sarcasm schtick, but I'm liking how red-in-the-face it's making Koharu.

"Honestly, elder-sama," Sasuke picks up with a drier version of my tone, "We hope this is our last human trafficking Trial. It's not boding well with our morals. Are you at least familiar with what those are?" Burn, baby!

"Are you petulant children finished, or do you just want to forfeit the Trial before finding out your result?" She has me by the balls there. Man, and I had a really good follow-up for Sasuke's taunt, too!

"Alright, then. Did we pass, or did you honestly want us to risk the Shinobi Alliance and my friendship with the Kazekage?"

"I don't know, Uzumaki! How do you expect to become the Hokage when you still treat your elders with such disrespect? Putting you in office now would be like putting an Academy student in charge of an ANBU squadron!" Once again, I have to feel bad for Mitokado since has to listen to this hag every damn day.

"There are differences, Koharu," I place a knee on the table and lean down close to her, "I'm ready, I'm going to do it, and I'm going be the best you've ever seen in your long-ass life! Add Sasuke's help on top of that, and you have something that's _unstoppable._"

"Your cockiness will get you nowhere, Uzumaki," She sticks her nose up defiantly, but my presence dwarfs hers entirely.

"Unstoppable, Koharu. That includes you," I stand up and flash a smile, "It feels a lot better when you're on my side, you know! Why don't we start over, and we can make this relationship work once I'm in office. What do you say?"

"You passed, now get out of here, and take the doctors with you!" Can't say I didn't try.

"Koharu, perhaps you're being too rough. We were well aware of his behavior before allowing him to attempt the Trials. You knew to expect this," Mitokado pats her hand, but she is hearing nothing of it.

"Out!" When she screams, the doctors jump and hide behind Sasuke and I. Like hell we were going to stay there any longer than we had to, so we run the doctors over to the hospital. Once there, we run into Shizune talking to Sakura about some patient with chronic nosebleeds.

"I'm telling you, Shizune. Give him one of the older nurses and he won't have a problem anymore," We catch the end of the conversation, but both women notice me approaching. Wearing orange and being blond always helps!

"Hey Sakura! And Shizune, what's up?" I grin at both of them, and they exchange a glance and giggle at me.

"What's so funny?" I scratch the back of my head playfully. Now that I'm around decent company, I can slip back into my usual habits.

"You seem chipper. You passed the the Trial?" Sakura smiles broadly at both of us. I don't know what it is, but there seems to be a sparkle in her eyes, and she's having a great hair day.

"You betcha! Speaking of which, let me introduce you to my friends," I pull the doctors forward and motion towards Sakura, "Kouba-sensei, Hakushi-sensei? This is my friend, Sakura. If she'll be nice, she'll go and help your patients back in Suna."

"I'll be doing what now?" Okay, volunteering her for something wasn't a great idea, but she's taken it well. In fact, she giggles a bit when she shakes Hakushi's hand.

"Sakura-chan, please?" I'm allowed to use my school boy honorifics when I beg, "I had to make a deal for my Trial, and you were my bargaining chip. So, what do you say? Can you go help Gaara out for a few days?"

"Well, sure," I pump my fist by my side quickly and start rambling about preparations for her trip and how thankful I was.

"Wait up, baka-Naruto. I'm not leaving for a couple days," She turns towards the doctors as I go slack-jawed, "Can your patients last long enough? I can make it to Suna in less than a day if I fly there."

"Fly? Since when could you do that?" I squawk, and that gets me a dirty look from Sasuke. I guess I'm not allowed to embarrass my boyfriend in public.

Sheesh, I can almost hear him in my mind saying "I'm not your boyfriend, dobe." It's pitiful that he's stubborn enough that I'm already rejecting _myself_! Why can't we just be dating, damn it!

"You're not even listening me!" Oops, I zone out around Sakura way too much for my own good!

"Yeah I am! But why is that so important?" I have a "Line" for Sasuke, and this is my "Line" for Sakura. It's saved me a billion times from her crushing fists!

"Are you kidding me? Last time I checked, your inauguration and your festival are pretty damn important!"

"Right, right, right! Hey, it's not official yet!" I chuckle and wipe a finger under my nose to cover my huge smile. She's being sweet, though I know I would want to stay for all the fun stuff, too.

"Yeah, but it's about to be," Sasuke's interjection snaps some gooey barrier in my mind that was stopping me from fully realizing something.

My dream...this is my dream. It's changed it's meaning and it's purpose for me almost a hundred times, but it never stopped being the most important goal I've ever had. What everybody said was impossible is happening _right now. _Everyone standing around me has helped me get here, and there are more that I could thank all over the world. More importantly, though, are the people who aren't on this world anymore. Jiraiya, the Third Hokage. . .Mom, Dad . . .hell, even Haku and Zabuza!

But now is not the time for inner acceptance speeches. This last Trial, there's no saying what it will be! It's the Pig Trial, for fuck's sake! What the hell could that even entail?

"Naruto, you seem pretty zoned-out today? Are you nervous about your final Trial?" Sakura lays her hand against my rapidly pounding chest, and I swallow thickly.

"No shit, Sherlock," I absent-mindedly patted her head and high-tail it out of the hospital with Sasuke on my heels. I only notice that he's saying something when he pulls me back by my hair.

"Dobe! Stop freaking out," He shoves me against the hospital gate, which sloshes my liquefied brains around my spinning head. It's the last bits of will I have that prevent me from being reduced to seizures.

"I'm trying, okay? I just can't think straight for shit," This wobbly yard is making me feel nauseous. Make it stop, make it stop...

Laying my forehead against Sasuke's helps, and focusing everything I have on the shuriken-star in his eyes makes it easier to cope with the weird effects of my panic attack.

"Naruto, Sasuke?" That voice is...Shizune's, right? She was next to Sakura earlier. . .or was that Rock Lee? Fuck if I remember. All I know is that Sasuke shouldn't have pulled away from me.

"As tough as he looks, he's prone to panic attacks," Oi! This is the only one you've ever witnessed, okay? The other time, it was about you. The other time, it was _supremely_ worse than this little worry session!

Except now I can hear how fast my heart it beating, how shallow my breaths are, and I don't remember my chest being this tight a minute ago, and why are there rainbow lights everywhere?

"You two have a couple hours before you'll be summoned. By then, make sure he's prepared," I catch the back end of the conversation, but it sounds like they're speaking through a wall.

Hokage, what if I become it? Fail it, I'm going to fail it, what if I fail it, I've always been that failure, when did that ever stop?

When did I end up here? Did Sasuke drag me to...

My apartment?

Was this ramen in front of me a second ago?

"Your eyes are moving. Does that mean you're calm enough to hear me?" Sasuke sits next to me and places a hand underneath my chin. My eyes flick over to his.

"Aren't you supposed to be the relaxed 'go with the flow' one? Leave the worrying and the over-analyzing to the master," He runs his fingers soothingly through my hair as he feeds me my favorite food.

"Sasuke," My voice is never this hoarse. My ragged breathing took its toll, I guess.

"Just eat," He brings the noodles to my mouth again, but I gently take the chopsticks and put them back into the container.

"Did Shizune tell you what our Trial was?" I calm the fluttering in my chest before I can freak out over saying that damn word, "Trial." I hope I never have to say that word again after I get done with this.

"No. She just said that we should be prepared. They should be getting us in twenty minutes or so," That soon! No, no, stop it. That's plenty of time to cheer up.

"Naruto, don't hold back. If you need to panic some more, it's better to do it now than when we're at the Trial."

"Don't you think the future Hokage should be able to stay calm? They should be confident that they will pass no matter what, right? Does it look like I'm doing that?" I can't fake a bravado like I usually do, I can't even stop my brow from furrowing!

"I have no idea what you're looking at," Sasuke pulls me up and drags me in front of the dresser mirror. He forces me to look at my untidy hair, bruised eyes, and garish orange jumpsuit. This is the fucking Rokudaime?

"The boy who was always carefree to the point of being stupid? He's in there still, but he's been overshadowed," He stands beside me in the mirror, dwarfing me with his lively hair, glowing skin, and stunning eyes. How the hell am I even able to stand next to someone like him?

"You listen to me, Naruto. That bottom-rung loser you think you still see in this mirror? He's been taken over by the man who works so hard for everything, who wants to protect everyone, who is so impressively powerful that he's the village hero! This person you're looking at is that man, and he's going to become Hokage. I know for that for a fact, since no lesser man would be able to make an Uchiha fall in love with him."

Sasuke...

_Sasuke!_

"SASUKE!" He doesn't know what hit him, but he should be figuring it out now that my lips are glued to his. I don't give a flying fuck when our teeth clash, or when my chin starts dripping, since the only thing that matters is the man who just snapped me out of my funk.

If we didn't only have a few minutes to get ready, I would have him out of his clothes in a heartbeat. I wouldn't regret not "taking it slow" because I don't think anything else would come close to showing how much I love him, simple as that.

I try to resist grinding harshly against Sasuke, even though he is just as excited as I am. Getting off would probably calm me down, but I think I need some body control for this Trial, so that's a no-go. Gotta stop this before it gets too the tipping point.

"Okay, I'm ready," I push myself off of him and stand up as swiftly as I can. He doesn't register that I left right away, so I get to see Sasuke splayed out on my apartment floor, catching his breath through swollen lips. Feeling a bit awkward about leaving him high and dry, I reach down and take his hands so I can pull him to his feet.

"Fine," He dusts himself off and wipes his mouth before grabbing his katana off of my bed.

"It's time, anyway. I hope you're ready dobe, because-" Sasuke gets cut off by a loud pop, and suddenly we surrounded by white smoke. When it clears, I come face to face with the faces of all of the previous Hokages. Standing in front of us is one of the people who has their face carved into that mountain.

"Tsunade," I nod and straighten my back, then address the other two with her, "Shizune. . .TonTon," Yes, even the pig gets a greeting.

"Uzumaki Naruto and Uchiha Sasuke. You've made it to your final Trial," She stays rigid and formal, so Sasuke and I both draw ourselves up and stare straight towards her.

"Are you ready to hear about what you will be doing for this Trial?" The cold October breeze blows past us, but not one person shivers.

"Always ready," With Sasuke supporting me, I definitely can take whatever she throws at us.

"To understand the meaning behind this Trial, I will recite from the First Hokage's scroll," She doesn't pull it out, so she must have it memorized, "The Will of Fire is generational. It must be passed along to the future shinobi. It is the people who came before that will bring about the next line, but it is the new generation that will define the world. However, it is their duty to surpass the ones that came before in order to improve upon the world entrusted to them," I'm seeing where this is going.

"Naruto-kun, Sasuke-kun. You are two fight Tsunade and I for your final Trial. Surpass us in combat, and you will be inaugurated tomorrow afternoon," Shizune narrows her eyes, "But if you fail, you may never try again."

"I'll agree to fighting you, but under one condition," I relax my shoulders a bit and take a quiet step towards her. I love Tsunade as if she were my grandmother, so this match isn't settling well in my heart.

"If this is a battle to the death, I will refuse to kill either of you. If that's a requirement, then fail me right now," Everybody but Tsunade looks shocked at how easy I would accept failure. No, she just smirks at me and shakes her head.

"No, we'll be judged by the elders," As she says it, Koharu and Mitokado walk through the door and observe us from the other side of the rooftop. Tsunade brings my attention back to her with a loud knuckle crack.

"Just don't think I'll go easy on you. You think you can become Hokage? Prove it, gaki."

"Hell yeah, I will! Don't you dare hold back!" I take a ready stance, and Sasuke follows suit by pulling out his katana and letting his Eternal Mangekyou spin fiercely.

"Don't underestimate us old people," Shizune, who bunches her sleeve up to expose her poison senbon launcher, "Especially you, Sasuke. You're trying to replace me here."

"Beeh!" Even TonTon scrapes her hooves against the ground.

"Too bad for you, Shizune," He taunts her by gesturing at her launcher with his katana, "But I doubt you'll be able to find out if your special poison will make it past my immunities today."

"At my signal, the fight may begin," Mitokado holds up a small gong in one hand and a striker in the other. He glances at one team, and then the other, then back again. Once he sees that everyone is ready, he gives the signal.

"Here we go! Kage Bunshin!" My first signature move may be cliché, but it's the best decision here. While Tsunade gets herself warmed up, she's going to want to show-off her strength. I'd rather that energy gets tossed onto my clones instead of myself. Meanwhile, Shizune is used to avoiding in battles, so she's going to end up using her poison gas pretty soon. Sasuke will take it slow so he can observe Tsunade beating the shit out of my clones.

She soon gets bored with it, so I have to think of a next step to my "plan." Next part involves using Natural Energy so I can become as wickedly strong as she is. Luckily, we're on the roof, so she isn't going to be trying to smash the ground towards me.

I summon one clone to gather the energy for Sage Mode, but it gets taken out by one of Shizune's senbon. Sasuke growls and sweeps Shizune towards the wall with Rock Lee's Leaf Hurricane kick. While she's down, he gathers up Lightning chakra to the end of his katana, and he uses it to direct a sharp bolt at her launcher. Her kimono gets scorched, but the only thing harmed was her weapon.

"Who taught you to ignore your opponent?" I snapped back to attention, narrowly avoiding a chakra-infused right hook.

"Some old geezer. Wasn't you, was it?" I wonder if she'll let me live after these Trials with all the insults I'm going to end up lobbing at her.

"I would never teach a dumb ass how to be a dumb ass!" She forces me to block and back up against the railing. Giving me no time, she uppercuts me up and over, but I flip mid-air and catch myself on the roof. Following my instinct, I bounce from rooftop to rooftop in an effort to separate the two groups. If Tsunade's away, Shizune will be left open. She's the weakest link here, so capturing her will assure us a win.

"Naruto!" Sasuke yells from a few rooftops behind. He and Shizune are still clashing, but she's managing to herd Sasuke towards us. Ultimately, Sasuke chooses to follow me. Sasuke matches our speed easily, but so does Shizune, surprisingly.

"Shizune, get your ass up here!" Tsunade falls back from me in order to grab Shizune, "Plan 40-K!"

"Right!" Once she agrees, Shizune and Tsunade stand side by side, facing us. We're forced to stop and turn around, though I can only hope that Ichiraku ramen's roof is strong enough to hold us.

Suddenly, we're surrounded by a cloud of purple smoke. Poison gas, just as I thought! I shove my hands over Sasuke's mouth and nose and I stop breathing. Something smashes into us, sending us flying. With a heavy thud and crack, we're stopped by the side of a building. The cloud dissipates, revealing Tsunade and Shizune, who smirk down at us from the top of Ichiraku.

"Nice one," I peel myself from the wood, "But would you please not wreck _my _village?"

"Cockiness will get you nowhere against me, Naruto!"

"No, but genjutsu certainly will," Sasuke's voice comes from behind them, so they both turn around. I can't see whatever they're seeing, but it's freaking them out.

"I'm showing them a bit of what I went through when I was on that drug. They'll be shaken after this. Are you sure you don't want to finish it off right here?" Sasuke asks without taking his spinning eyes off of the women.

"I'd rather the finishing move be less under-handed, not that your Tsukiyomi isn't a legitimate end-all!" I shout up to him, and together we lead the women to a new location so they're disoriented when the genjutsu is released.

Near the entrance to the completely restored Ninja Academy, I sit on the new swing they built.

"Wake them up and have them facing me, Sasuke. She gave a speech, I should return the favor," I smile nicely as Sasuke follows my plan. They blink a few times and look around, probably checking for signs of weirdness.

"Sorry, Sasuke really likes using Tsukiyomi," I begin swinging lightly, dragging my feet over the dirt beneath me, "It's a really useful technique, passed down through his clan. Thing is, Sasuke and Uchihas before him all had to do something horrible to get it. What I'm getting at is this; I'm all for the idea of 'surpassing the previous generation' and 'learning from their mistakes', but that leaves no room for us to decide what we'll do."

While I speak, they take a few steps towards me, only to be blocked by Sasuke's sword. "Listen," He orders them, so I continue.

" The older ones are too busy telling us what to do or not do. They don't realize that we might be able to figure out a different, better way to go about life. I've seen examples of this too often, but Sasuke's story has been the worst yet. Itachi didn't give Sasuke the option of becoming strong by himself, and many of the things Itachi in an effort to strengthen him only made Sasuke fall further. But even before then, Sasuke's family didn't give him the option of proving himself. Instead, they told him it was better to be like Itachi."

"Dobe, when did I ever say that you were allowed to use me as an example for your little speech?" He pulls his sword out from in front of Tsunade and Shizune, who seem finally ready to fight.

"You can argue with me about it later, right now," I swing high, jumping off at the peak. When I jump, Sasuke slashes at Tsunade and Shizune. Tsunade pulls Shizune and herself into the air to avoid his sword, but that makes them collide with my crowd of clones.

"U-zu-ma-ki!" With every syllable, my clones and I kick both of the women further into the air.

"Lion's Barrage!" Sasuke, flying in from above, kicks them down with both of his legs, and then grabs them before they can be flung to the ground. Without missing a beat, I switch into Kyuubi mode and grab them with my chakra hands. When they try struggling out of my grip, I squeeze them as lightly as I can.

With both of them in my grasp, they have no where to turn. Check and mate.

"I'd rather we not go any further with this, Tsunade. You could end up with cracked ribs and broken bones and probably some burns from my chakra," I let them down enough that they can put their toes down. Seeing her chances, Tsunade chuckles and looks at me.

"You think you can do it better, change the world? To be honest, I'd really like to see you try. Something tells me your generation will be the one to do it," She smiles, and I let both of them go. She pulls herself up and starts speaking with her this-was-from-the-scroll tone.

"Utatane Koharu-sama and Mitokado Homura-sama, I, Tsunade, The Godaime of Konohagakure, have battled against the Trial's Participant, Uzumaki Naruto, and have determined their prowess in battle to be far superior to my own. The Participant's Assistant, Uchiha Sasuke, has demonstrated his faithfulness, loyalty, and strength during his battle against my Assistant, Shizune. If the Elders are in agreement with this observation, it is advised that they gather an audience consisting of the entire village and the shinobi so that they may announce the inauguration and festival that will occur in twenty-four hours, the evening of October 10th."

My birthday? I'm going to be inaugurated on my birthday!

"It is true that they defeated you in battle," Koharu and Mitokado appear from the gates of the Academy, with Koharu being the one to speak up, "But they relied on their curses, the very ones that frighten and turn the villagers against them!"

"You idiots, are you blind?" Tsunade picks the elders up by their collars, "Their strength is their own, no matter what it comes from or whatever reactions they get from them! You two are the ones who wanted to see if he could pass these damn Trials! I was just going to let him in office after that year of training, but no, you had to go and bring up old customs! They passed all of your stupid Trials, now make the damn speech!"

"Put us down, Tsunade-hime," Mitokado orders, but his facial expression doesn't change from his usual frown. She must do this to them a lot.

"It's decided, then. Shizune, go get some shinobi and gather the villagers. The speech starts in an hour," Tsunade fakes a smile to them before putting the old bastards down.

"Should we meet you there, then?" Sasuke asks, putting his bloodless sword back into its holster.

"Yeah, just come have tea with me for a little bit. I have something I want to ask you two."

* * *

><p>"This tastes horrible!" I wrinkle my nose at the sake. Oh, excuse me, the "tea" that Tsunade offered to us. I took a small sip of it, but it's strong alcoholic taste was too gross for me to keep down. I barely manage to choke it down instead of spitting it back in the cup.<p>

"Take it like a man, Naruto. That's what you are now!" Tsunade downs her fourth cup, and it does nothing to help her splotchy cheeks.

"Are you really upset about being replaced?" I ask, reaching over the desk to try to stop her from picking the bottle up again, but she smacks my hand away.

"No! I'm celebratin'!" She hiccups and refills her cup, "And I'm not really good at asking awkward questions unless I'm drunk off my ass, heheh!"

"Awkward questions? I doubt this is a good time for those," Sasuke hisses lightly. He hasn't even taken a look at his sake since it was poured.

"It's a simple question though! Awkward, yes, but simple!" Tsunade points a finger and flicks it back and forth between us while she downs her next cup. Once finished, she pops the question, "So, are you two really together?"

"How the hell does everybody know?"

"Well, I don't know who else knows. I got my intel from that gossipy innkeeper you have. She told me that she heard some questionable sounds coming from your room!" She breaks out into peals of laughter, "Damn, Naruto! Good work! I really have no idea what he would think about it being a guy, but I'm sure Jiraiya would be fucking proud!"

"Alright, alright! Stop it!" I shout as menacingly as I can, but it doesn't stop me from blushing furiously. When she sees that, she lets out another round of giggles. We sit silently as she tires herself out and wipes her eyes.

"Geez, gaki. I'm just teasing. You know I'm happy for you!" She totters behind us and pats us on the back, "You've completed a bunch of your goals! You're going in office, you found happiness for yourselves. You two went into through hell ever since you were born, and now you're coming out on the other end with a lover by your side! Your mothers would be so happy. Kushina and Mikoto were great friends, you know."

Sasuke and I sigh and look at each other. She might be annoying as hell, but she still has a point. I smile at him, then go to pour Tsunade another drink. After all, we still have a while before the announcement.

* * *

><p>"Let it be recorded that on the morning of October the 9th, Uzumaki Naruto and his Assistant, Uchiha Sasuke, passed the thirteenth and final Trial!"<p>

Mitokado speaks into a microphone to give the speech. Looking up at us are all of the shinobi and villagers. I recognize all of my friends standing in the front row. Every one of them has a huge smile glued on their faces, even the stoic Neji. I see happy faces among the other shinobi and villagers, but it's much easier to spot the disapproving faces of the Dragon Knights. Before today, I would've been worried about only those who looked unhappy with those who don't want me to become Hokage. Not anymore. My friends supported me too much for me to ungratefully ignore their pride in me!

"Therefore, their inauguration and subsequent festival will be held tomorrow!"

"Mitokado, can I say something?" I whisper over to him, but Koharu glares at me. Why won't they let me speak? I try to ask again, but Koharu stops me again.

"Bow to your villagers," She orders, but Sasuke and I look at each other first. She snaps again, "Bow!" so we have no other choice.

I hear cheering from my friends and supporters, but the silence from the rest of Konoha is deafening to me.

* * *

><p>Wow. I just wrote the last actual Trial...but, still, I'm not done yet! Hell, I haven't even made half of what happened during those Trial's relevant yet...but tell me what you thought of them, anyway!<p>

Sorry again that I'm releasing this on Saturday instead of Wednesday. To describe how pissed off I am at certain people wouldn't begin to cover it, but it served as a distraction from my writing.

Read and Review, and thanks for reading so far!


	15. Post Trial: Admission

I know I should feel bad for being late, but I'm going to be giving a double chapter anyway, so whatever XP. The next one will come either tomorrow night or the end of the weekend. It's hard to determine since tomorrow is my girlfriend's birthday.

I was a bit sad at how close the end of my story is, so I felt like it was okay to be a bit slower. Plus, Skyrim's nearly out, so I wanted to finish up Oblivion XP AAAnd my room was being worked on all week. So whoop de doo for excuses.

Re-reading _White Oleander_. It's written in such amazing language, I had to read it again.

BTW, somehow I don't own Naruto or Sasuke. Can someone please tell me why not! whatever, I got my disclaimer on.

* * *

><p><em>Post-Trials: Admission<em>

Before Naruto and I are even allowed to be put in to office, we're forced through a gauntlet of department meetings and paperwork processes. It was by some miracle that we weren't shepherded around by the elders themselves. We had been turned loose on Shizune, who shows us mission forms as if they were sacred texts.

"It's important that you stay fair with choosing what rank a mission falls into. I know it's tempting to label it as a lower, less expensive rank for the poorer folks that come in here, but you may end up endangering little Genin."

"We definitely know all about that, Shizune. You weren't around when we got assigned the mission to the Land of Waves. We had to fight against Gato, Zabuza, and Haku before I could even do my Rasengan! Sasuke here nearly got himself killed," Some days, I feel as though that was the only mission we ever went on as a team. Naruto must share my sentiments, since it seems to be the only mission he ever mentions when he talks about his genin years.

"If Haku had aimed for it, I would've been," I trace the kanji at the top of the forms, over and over the lines for Shinobi.

"Well, then, don't let that happen to other kids!" Shizune looked a bit shocked at what we had been put through, but she only holds on to Tonton tighter. A medic nin bursting in doesn't help her nerves much.

"Shizune-sama! Kakashi won't take his medicine. He says he'll only take it if you bring him Naruto-sama and Sasuke-sama!" Ah, I was expecting some contact from our old sensei soon.

"Man, did Tsunade get a hold of him or something?" Naruto sighs and starts for the door. "See ya, Shizune. Thanks for the run through, but Kakashi calls!"

Shizune waves us out, and we're made to follow the young medic nin over to the hospital.

"I wonder how that idiot got himself injured again," I make the comment as we sign in to the hospital. I get my answer soon from Sakura's screams.

"Damn it, Kakashi! You go out and get slashed with a poison kunai, and you won't even take your medicine! You stubborn ass!" She complains incessantly as we enter Kakashi's room.

"Take the pills, Kakashi, we're here!" Naruto barges in like he owns the place and throws himself onto the bed next to Kakashi, flinging an arm behind our masked teacher.

"Will do," Instantly copacetic, Kakashi hides his face under his blanket and takes his pills. Naruto cranes his neck to try to see Kakashi's face, but he fails once again. Look on the bright side, dobe, maybe you could use your powers as Hokage to order his face shown?

"Naruto, Sasuke, congratulations!" Sakura squeaks and runs to hug us both. Being as excitable as she is, she also plants a kiss on our cheeks and starts bouncing around. She tries asking us questions about our battle with Tsunade, but she's talking at a mile a minute. Our calmer sensei drowns out her ramblings.

"So, Hokage, huh? That's a mighty large leap from Genin, and in just a year. And you, Sasuke, your jump is even more impressive. Scourge of Ninjas and a missing nin of Konoha to being the Hokage's Assistant," The part of his mask over his mouth turns up in a smile, and his eyes twinkle. I know that damn look better than I know my own glare.

"Before you fruitlessly try to trick Naruto into telling you, I will say right now that I will _not_ appease your perverted thoughts!" Knowing my luck, Kakashi would be able to get every embarrassing detail out of Naruto if I didn't give this warning ahead of time.

"Into telling him what? That we're dating?"

"God dammit, Naruto! I never said we were!"

"Yeah right, so we were totally just friends in the desert, right?" That fucking dumb ass is going to die before he's even made Hokage!

"Well, this may be an interesting development, but I can't say I'm shocked. Now, can one of you wake up Sakura?" Kakashi points to Sakura, who just passed out on the floor because of blood loss. Nosebleeds seem to be dangerous, I'm glad I never get them.

"Sakura! Oh, shit, I forgot that we didn't tell her!" Naruto whacks himself in the head as he revives our former teammate.

"R-Really?" Sakura groggily mutters the word, and dobe can't help but to laugh at her.

"Yeah, really. I'm glad you aren't taking this hard. I always imagined that you'd kick my ass if I ever even considered dating Sasuke," He flicks his eyes over to me and smirks. He's going to fling out the "dating" concept over and over until I bend to his will. If that's his game, he's in for a long ride.

"You guys! I'm so glad, so so SO happy for you! Oh man, I really have to tell Ino this right now!" With renewed energy, she flies to her feet and runs towards the door, but not before hugging us again.

"Oi! I said I haven't made up my mind yet!" I yell at her back, but she's already flitting out of the room to go tell the world the news.

"Do you really think that's believable, Sasuke?" I might as well release my frustration on this cocky man.

"You know, I'm not the Assistant yet. I have nothing against beating you while you're weakened!" I hiss at him, and he just pats a space next to him.

"Sit down, you crazy boy. You have too much energy, I'm just an old man!" Bullshit, aren't you still in your twenties? I refuse to sit next to him, so Naruto takes the space.

"Is that really all you wanted to know, Kakashi?"

"Well, sure! Don't assume that I'm not proud of you becoming Hokage, but that was a given. This relationship of yours, now, that's showing true growth. It's more symbolic than you realize, boys." He pats Naruto on the top of the head, ruffling his hair.

"I thought so, too, Kakashi-sensei. I mean, you were there when I was told about Sasuke and I being fated to fight. He said that I'm like a Senju, and Sasuke is an Uchiha," Naruto takes my hand and wrenches me closer to him, "Now look at us! Senju and Uchiha, together after all these years. It's too bad we can't have a kid, huh? It might start the cycle over again, but at least we'd be able to show them what to do when hatred tries to show up on the scene like some uninvited drunk guy!"

"I guess that means you haven't taken a better look at the kid that Tsunade's taking care of," Right, the clone. That's the first time I've heard about him in a while. Even Kakashi's seen him?

"Oh, you mean Aero! Yeah, he's my clone. I think that counts, technically. But he's just mine, it doesn't really have the same meaning, you know?"

"Yours?" Kakashi raises an eyebrow at the connotation behind that. Then again, he had wanted to take Aero as his own earlier.

"Yeah! When Aero and I have grown up a bit, I was hoping to be like a father. He does have my genes, after all!" Raising a kid with Naruto . . . just the thought heats up my face. It's a pleasant thought, to be honest. He'd make a good dad, seeing as the Hokage is like the father of the villagers.

"I think you should take a closer look at him sometime. Perhaps you'll notice the same things that I did," a secretive glint passes over his eyes again, and we're left to wonder what he could possible be talking about.

A nurse comes in soon after he gave the suggestion. She apologizes profusely to us, but she tells us that she was given orders to give Kakashi a sleeping drug. Naruto complies quickly, and he pulls me along with him. He has become a man on a mission, and it's to go see that clone child. It's going to bring up memories about that grotesque hide-out and Kuroni's death, but I agree with him. We have the time, so we should address what Kuroni left behind for us.

"Tsunade will let us see him, right?" It seems like a silly question to me, but I notice the downcast look on his face. I reach out and take his hand in mine, an action which instantly cheers him up. This affection tactic seems to work a lot better than sparring the unhappiness out of him.

"There's no reason why she should keep him from you. Sure, you may get attached, but that's good. It should get to know us so that it's comfortable for whenever we want to raise it."

"Now you're the one saying 'us' and 'we'! Would you really raise a kid with me?" Naruto leans his head down close to my ear as we walk down an empty street.

"If we start dating, then yes."

"Really, because most people wouldn't go straight from dating to raising a kid!" It's about time that he got some clarification about the importance of this decision. He seems to think "dating" is just a term flung around by people who just happen to like making out.

"Naruto, listen to me," I walk in front of him and grab under his chin, "If I love you strongly enough that I would agree to date you, that means I'd be agreeable to everything that comes with that."

"What exactly do you think comes with it?" Naruto furrows his eyebrows. I knew ahead of time that he wasn't going to understand, so I'm able to clarify with a short list.

"All the other things that follow. Raising a kid is one of them, along with, well," As much as I try, it's hard to keep eye contact, "Engagement, marriage, living together-"

"Sex, Sasuke. That tends to come before any of that other good stuff," Naruto's beaming brightly, obviously dreaming about all of the aforementioned things that we may or may not be doing in the future.

"One thing leads to another, Naruto. So you're not just asking me to agree to be your boyfriend, you're essentially asking me to move in with you, marry you, and have a kid," I interrupt him before he can get the words past his lips, "And yes, you're also soliciting me for sex. It just all comes wrapped together with me."

"I always figured that you'd be that type," Naruto rolls his eyes and kisses me softly. He presses his chest to mine and smirks suggestively, "So would you rather I ask all that? Alright, then. Sasuke, will you move in to my house as a date and have sex with me while there's a kid and a minister ready to marry us in the next room?"

"I'm certain that we would be breaking several records and laws with that," It's stupid enough to make me want to his dobe, but it brings a small smile to my lips. I settle for just resting my forehead against his.

"Nice way of skirting around the question, Teme," He tries to sound bitter, but he just ends up kissing me again. I press my lips more firmly against his until he gets the idea. Parting our lips, we deepen the kiss. I know very well that I'm not making him worry nearly enough about whether or not I'll say yes, but I think I've been playing hard-to-get for long enough already. We've already gone this far, and I'm in love with him.

Now I just have to figure out how to say it.

* * *

><p>"You want to see the kid?" Tsunade darts around the room, preparing diligently for our inauguration. She's pulling out kimono and scrolls from closets that I never knew even existed in the Hokage's office. "That's easy, he's just a couple doors down. Normally, I'm free enough to have his cradle in here, but I roped Shiho from Cryptanalysis into looking over the little tyke. Now go there and leave me alone! I have so much shit to get done before tonight!"<p>

She's not the only busy one in Konoha. There's two large teams working on the inauguration and another on the festival. But no one seems to be working harder than this poor girl, Shiho. She's scrambling around, trying to clean up Aero's face while milk boils over on the little stove.

"Is the little guy misbehaving?" Naruto chuckles and picks up Aero as if he's done this sort of thing for ages. His arms create a perfect-sized cradle for the blond baby. "He's heavier since the last time we saw him. I'm glad he's getting healthier! He's still a bit pale, though."

"I was concerned about that too, Naruto-kun, but Tsunade assured me that his skin is naturally a light tone," Shiho is nice enough to answer him even though she's in the middle of trying to warm the milk properly. I was about to help her, but Naruto walks in my direction with the baby.

"Look at him, Sasuke. What do you think Kakashi was talking about?" As if on cue, the little child looks up at me with his expressive, slate-blue eyes. It's strange that there's any gray in his eyes, seeing as Lady Chance's eyes are green. As I stare further into them, I notice some faint lines in the irises. That couldn't possibly be what I think it is!

"Naruto, his eyes, do you see lines?" I ask him quickly, and Naruto searches for a moment.

"Yeah, you're right! They kind of look like, well I'm not sure but maybe, sorta?" I stop him and give him the word he's looking for.

"Rinnegan. He has an incomplete Rinnegan. It's a technique that only highly-developed Uchihas or people like Nagato could gain. It came from the Sage of the Six Paths, as you should know by now. He was the father of Senju and Uchiha. This kid would have to have both of those to have these eyes!"

"And his hair, look at how it's laying. It's still a bit short, but the front is laying flat, but the back won't seem to stay down!" He's right, his hair is behaving in a very familiar way.

"He must have taken it. I never imagined that he would create your clone using it, but he must have."

"Kuroni used your DNA, too. That's the only explanation!" Naruto should be concerned with the implication, but he just grins like an idiot. "He's ours, Sasuke! Both of us!"

"This really isn't how I intended to revive my clan," I sighed, but I hover a hand over the baby and let it grasp it's hand around one of my fingers, "However, it's not wholly unacceptable. I just never though it could be possible."

"I know, but isn't it great? Hey, Shiho!" Naruto calls across the room to the struggling girl, "It's ours!"

"What!" She drops the bottle onto the floor, "I never had a child! I haven't even . . .nevermind!"

"No, no, no, I meant it's Sasuke's baby, too! It's got genes from both of us! Man, this day just keeps getting better!" Naruto looks like he's going to start running around in excitement, so I gently take the baby from him and lay it back amongst its stuffed animals and blankets. Tsunade's spoiling him early, I see.

"Now I understand why Kakashi wanted to see us so urgently. He probably had just been able to see Aero, and he saw all the signs," I put a hand on Naruto's shoulder to calm down his excitement. It's good that he's happy about it, but I think it's starting to agitate the baby. "It's about time we go, Dobe. Aero needs to eat, and I think you're making feeding time more difficult for Shiho."

"Yeah, I get it. Thanks for taking care of my kid, Shiho!" He goes over and randomly gives the flustered woman a hug before letting me pull him out of the room.

"Do you think we should ask Tsunade if she knows about it being ours?"

"I'm sure she knew already, dobe. She's a medical expert, I'm sure she can tell what genes a kid carries when she sees him," Together, we head towards the inn for the final time so we can pack, "If you tried asking her right now, she'd probably bite your head off."

"Yeah, you're right. I'll leave her to that," I'm liking how complacent he's becoming. I figure that he doesn't feel like he has be the better man anymore. He already knows that he has my attention, so that means he's already the best.

My wandering thoughts are starting to sound like a stupid fangirl's driveling. I would be afraid of becoming obsessed if I wasn't already trained in the art of apathy. If I ever have strange thoughts again, I'll just become apathetic until I sort myself out.

That's not going to be a very effective plan if he ever decides to blow me again.

Oi! Didn't I just say that I wasn't going to think like that? Don't think like that! Shut up, mind, he's saying something to me!

"Did we ever find out the name of this inn?" Naruto's posing a valid question. We always just called it the inn, and the woman was the innkeeper. We didn't know either of the names for them even though their presence was pretty important during our Trials.

"Hello boys! I heard that this was your last Trial, it's big news around town! Did you pass?" Our little innkeeper, who we now know is a gossipy old lady, shuffled up to us and put our shoes into the closet.

"We passed! I'm going to become Hokage!" Naruto decided to even hug the little old lady, and she gave a odd gasp when he did.

"We never caught your name or the name of your in, ma'am," I asked her gently, and she looked at me as if I asked it in a different language.

"Why, I'm Ryoka! This here is the Kitai Inn," Or, in other words, it's the Inn of Hope.

"Nice to finally meet you officially, Ryoka-san. Let me introduce us again! I'm Uzumaki Naruto, and this is Uchiha Sasuke," He and I both bow to her, and she returns the courtesy.

"Nice to meet you, boys. And goodbye, because I assume you're here to pack! These past couple weeks have been great. Now, I must move along and take care of the other guests. I look forward to hearing good things about you, Hokage-sama!" With that, we head down the hall to our room.

When we enter the small room, I breathe in the familiar scents around us. It was in shambles compared to how we came to it, but it has changed drastically in my eyes. When we first came here, that kitchen table had been the site of many glaring contests and quarrels. It turned into a place where he and I would plan our Trials and make fun of the food that the other had made.

"You know, they added on a large section to the Hokage tower this time. It's where the Hokage and their family can live, that way they're protected by guards at all times," He speaks to me from the other side of the room where he's packing up the disorganized supply boxes. Meanwhile, I'm cleaning the kitchen and packing up any of our leftover food and throwing out what we don't want.

"So, I suppose that's where you're staying?" I glance over my shoulder to talk to him. His fingers are fiddling with some of the vests, scrunching it up then flattening it out.

"Ah, well, what I was trying to say is that, you see," Naruto stopped fidgeting and threw his hands and the vest down, "Are you going to live with me or not?"

After my time in jail, the years spent with Orochimaru, and the lonely time in Konoha before that, nothing could've sounded better. It's only been a couple weeks, and we haven't been in our room for much of the time, but it was long enough to realize that Naruto is easy to live with. He had started out by being a bit messy, but he learned after a single glare I made at an empty ramen cup on our table. Since then, he keeps his things in well-enough order.

He's not a bad cook, he washes his clothes, and he's respectful of my space, whenever I need it. Plus, it's nice to wake up to being in his arms, his warmth tying me to him. Even in his sleep, he whispers my name and smiles.

"Yeah," I answer faster than I would prefer, since I haven't even agreed to be in a relationship. I cover it up, "Though it will not have any implications until I decide it does, understand? We'll go through all the conditions later. For now, we need to focus on packing," By now, I'm used to being tackled while I'm not looking. Orange arms encircle my waist from behind, and he nuzzles into my hair and neck.

"I love you," He murmurs into my hair. As if it's a reflex, one of my arms reach up and behind me to grip blond hair. I twist slightly in his arms so I can catch his lips mid-nuzzle, pulling him in. I pull away just long enough to tell him that I love him, too. He lowers his head and deepens the kiss, his taste mingling with mine. Though my knees can barely hold myself up, I just told him that we had to pack, so this can't last long. So, I turn around quickly and push him into the nearby wall. My body took over, biting his lips and licking the abuse away, grinding our hips once, twice, until Naruto starts pressing back desperately. That's when I know to give one last kiss before pushing myself away by his chest.

"Pack," I give his ruffled appearance a once over, "And try to look presentable by the time we get back to Konoha."

"Oh come on! We have time!" He can complain and whine all he wants, I'm still going to walk away and finish packing up the supplies. I'll let his erection be his reminder of possible things to come. My own excitement will hopefully go away soon, though it doesn't seem probable.

"You little bastard. And you call me a tease, huh? Damn it," He grumbles and goes back to work. I feel only a slight pang of guilt when he calls me a tease. After all, I haven't done anything more than get him painfully hard. Maybe it won't take that long after all.

"Dobe?" I ask, walking up behind my bothered lover. He turns around, pouting and glaring slightly.

"Am I doing something wrong?" He mumbles and tosses away the rag he was using to clean the counters.

"No. Do you think you can stay quiet?" My mouth starts watering slightly in anticipation, and my palms radiate warmth against my sides.

"Why, I'm not being- Hey!" I lift him by the hips and sit him on the counter. I put one finger over his mouth and shush him.

"I'm not letting this get back to Tsunade, so you have to stay quiet enough that the innkeeper doesn't hear," I give the warning while unbuttoning and unzipping his pants. When I expose him to the cool air, he chomps down on his hand to hold back a hiss. He draws blood when I take the head in my mouth and lick it languidly. If I don't take it slow, he'll cum too fast for this to be worth the effort. I think back to what he did to me and imitate it. He had teased me by holding back, so I do just the opposite. I give myself over to lust, only barely holding back my own panting. Experimentally, I let my fingers play over the soft skin of his sac while I run my tongue over his dripping slit. In response, Naruto throws his head back and shivers, trying to thrust up into my mouth.

I've let this go on long enough. Taking in all that I can into my mouth and pumping the rest with my available hand, I build him up to his breaking point. Hungry sucks to his tip bring him over the edge, and I get a mouthful of hot cum. I consider spitting the foreign liquid out onto the rag, but it was gone in a simple swallow. I leave him there on the counter wordlessly, turning my back to him. It's a good five minutes before I hear him push off of the counter and zip up his pants.

"Take a nap, Naruto. I can have us packed and cleaned up way before we'll have to go."

"Mhm. Join me when you're done," His voice seems like it's coming from miles away in his thoughts. He crawls over and passes out on the futon, his face still brightly flushed.

Making good on my word, I clear out the rest of our things and put the bags near the door. I check the clock. We have a few hours before we have to go. I set the alarm and curl up with Naruto, whose taste I mull over in my mouth as I drift off to sleep.

* * *

><p>"Naruto-dono, please raise your arms!" One tailor pulls on Naruto's arms while three others work on fixing, modifying, and pinning his robes as needed. Another group of seamstresses work on getting an intricate Uchiha fan placed on the back of my robe, per Naruto's request.<p>

"Uchiha-dono, is this satisfactory?" It takes two seamstresses to hold up my kimono enough to show me the red and white silky threads that make up my symbol.

"This is great, but can you do me another favor?" An idea just popped into my mind, and I would like to see how it turns out.

"Why, of course! We were lucky enough that your robes fit you perfectly already, so we have a lot of free time. What would you like, Uchiha-dono?" The young woman blushes as she looks at me, but for once, I think it's more out of awe and respect than girlish fantasies. So, I tell them my request and they rush off to do it for me. Only twenty minutes later, they come back with the finished result. I have them put the robes and obis on me then. Naruto's still busy getting the ornate, fall themed kimono on. Bright red thread and an array of green silk wrap around him and fall like water from his broad shoulders. Gold threads in the fire glint like his hair, which is still messy, despite the efforts of the stylists.

"You take too long, dobe," I smirk when he nearly stumbles off the platform they have him standing on.

"Hot damn," He speaks as though his breath was taken from him. His eyes shine with pride as he looks over my fiery kimono. Representing the Fire Country and my own chakra, stylized flames raise from the hem and come alive as I move. My gold under robes give color to my pale skin, and the fire continues up into my red eyes. I knew just what he would notice and in what order because I can see myself in the mirrors surrounding him.

"You haven't seen it, yet," I turn around and allow him to look at the new symbol adorning my back. It's still my Uchiha symbol, but an Uzumaki spiral is stitched on the fan in shining, black thread. I'm not sure what it can be called yet, but whatever it is, it's ours.

However, I wasn't prepared to be spun around and caught in an embrace. Not in front of all these people, dobe! Think before you kiss me! He jumps back before I can hit him. The girls around us stare, and the male tailors have to staunch the flow of blood from their noses. It takes Naruto a moment before he realizes what he did.

"Oh, don't mind that!" He laughs nervously and scratches the back of his head.

"Get him dressed before I kill him," I hiss, but my smile reappears when I turn my back on him. I can feel his eyes burning my back as I walk away.\

* * *

><p>As the procession of guards take their first steps, the inaugural ceremony is set in motion. Side by side, Naruto and I walk in time to the drumming music in the hall. Our eyes are supposed to be set forward, but he keeps sending winks and smiles my way.<p>

Tsunade is in front of us, wearing the Hokage robes that she will be presenting to Naruto. She walks gracefully, as if all the stress from the previous hours had no effect on her poise. The elders stay beside her down the length of the hall, but even their presence is welcome. They hold themselves high despite their utter defeat.

Flanking us are ANBU guards, their masks looking more intricate and beautiful than ever. In fact, everything is looking brighter to me. The hall is lit with torches, but it's like the walls are on fire with light. The thrumming shamisen, deep drums and melodic flute control my heart beat and the rhythm of my thoughts. It's building stronger and faster as we near the balcony of the Hokage tower. When we finally emerge, the sun illuminates every inch of Naruto and I. Our friends, now that I can call them that, are on one knee for us. They bow deeper as we stop in front of them, and the villagers in the street follow suit.

Tsunade speaks first, talking slowly into the given microphone.

"History and hope for Konoha is being made this afternoon. With the inauguration of Uzumaki Naruto and Uchiha Sasuke, we will be entering a new era," She looks out on her rebuilding village and smiles, "And I've never seen a brighter future than this. I, Tsunade, officially resign as Hokage of Konoha." She backs away and bows to us before giving Mitokado the microphone.

"It is now time to pledge in the Rokudaime and his Assistant," He announces before turning towards us. We face him and nod our heads. Koharu stands before me, not showing any signs that she is upset. The pledges begin with Naruto.

"As Hokage, the most esteemed ninja in our village and our leader, will you strive to do nothing but good for your people?"

"I will," Naruto speaks clearly, but his anxiety shows in how quickly he says them.

"Will you promise to perform your duties with every ounce of your ability?"

"I will."

"Will you abide by all the rules, laws, and stipulations given by the past Hokages?"

"I will."

"Will you accept the life-long responsibility of protecting your village, even if it means your death?"

"I will."

Koharu begins my pledges. They sound a bit similar to Naruto's, but they emphasis my duty to Naruto.

"Will you give your assistance to the best of your ability?"

"I will," I speak calmly. No nerves have gotten to me yet.

"Will you abide by all the rules, laws, and stipulations given by the past Hokages and by the Hokage that you are assisting?"

"I will."

"Will you accept the life-long responsibility of protecting and aiding the Hokage and the village, even if it means your death?"

"I will," And that should be the final pledge. We have officially made it.

"As part of the Elder Council, I, Mitokado Homura, give you, Uzumaki Naruto, the title of Rokudaime, the Sixth Hokage of Konoha."

"And I, Utatane Koharu, as part of the Elder Council, give you, Uchiha Sasuke, the title of Assistant to the Rokudaime. You and Uzumaki are now officially in office."

Tsunade takes off the white robe and puts it onto Naruto. She bows before placing the triangular hat on top of his head. Naruto can't hold himself in, so he reaches out and presses a big kiss to Tsunade's forehead.

When Kiba and Rock Lee burst up and start applauding wildly, the rest of the rookies follow. They cheer, and it breaks the villagers out of their silent stupor. The screams and cries of joy bring tears to Naruto's eyes. A huge wave of confetti washes over us, and we're lost in our bliss.

That is, until it's broken by the leader of the Dragon Knights. Sweetie, with some remarkable strength for a woman of her size, manages to crawl up on the roof on a nearby building.

"What about those theories! Now that you two are in office, when will you show the true face of your evil plans! How about right now, huh? We're ready for you!" She screams out, spittle dripping down her double chin.

Naruto looks like someone gave him a cake that ended up being frosted with cat shit. I don't even pause before I take the microphone from him.

"If that's what you expected, then I'll clear things up for you myself. This'll be my first task as Assistant," I step through the aisle made by the rookies, who all pat my shoulders and back as I walk through them. Standing against the balcony, I address Sweetie and the rest of the crowd.

"Without realizing it, you Dragon Knights have proven one of my own theories. I believed that actions truly are louder than words, and this seems to hold true. I could stand here and rant about how much Naruto has done for you, how much he wanted all of you to love him all his life, but it would fall on deaf ears. You already know all of that, why would facts like that change your mind now?"

"Sasuke?" Naruto steps up beside me, but I only flick my eyes in his direction.

"I'll never be as good at Talk no Jutsu as Naruto. I've never been outspoken. All I can say is that, I assure you, none of the theories are true," I think for a moment, "Well, no, that's a lie."

"See! See, he's a lying ass! Why should we accept them in office?" Sweetie bounces and nearly breaks the roof.

"There's only one theory that holds any merit. I don't wish to give weight to any of the other rumors, but I want to make my whole title clear," I take a deep breath and wait a moment until the crowd falls silent in anticipation.

"I am Uchiha Sasuke, former missing nin and member of genin Team 7, and now the Assistant to the Hokage. From here on out, I can also be known as Uzumaki Naruto's boyfriend."

Needless to say, there wasn't a single jaw that didn't drop at my very public announcement.


	16. Post Trial: Submission

**Edit: Hey! Someone did fanart for this chapter! The artist's DA is Reiyumi, and it's the first time I had anyone make a tribute art for anything I've done, so I'm obviously super duper happy. FF won't let me really post the URL, so you're gonna have to look up ReiYumi on deviantart and look for her fanart titled Submission. Sorry!****  
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**This is nearly half the length of most of my chapters**, but that's because it's pretty much the continuation of the last chapter. Then again, I always felt that _**LEMON CHAPTERS~~~**_ should be quick and dirty XP Why, the biggest part of the plot of romance fan fics always happen during the lemon chapters, duh! They should be the focus.

Hope you like it. Sure, I'll admit it, I haven't written actual lemon before . And I'm a girl, who's also a lesbian. I'm relying on fan fiction knowledge and things I've looked up (Jiraiya style research?) Go right ahead and PM me any glaring screw ups or even little things that distracted you from it, that way I can get it right before The Trials is completed .

* * *

><p><em>Post-Trial: Submission<em>

My newly declared, totally amazing, mind-blowing boyfriend shoved the mic back at the old hag. Putting his hand on my back, he and I both bow to the hysterical crowd. I want some more screaming, people! When I sweep Sasuke into a showy kiss, all the girls break the sound barrier and my eardrums. When I lift Sasuke back up, he glares at me despite the smirk on his face.

I'll let him get pissed about the PDA later. Tonight, we're going to a festival in our honor! Seriously, can this get any better?

Leaving the crazed crowd behind, we go back to the dressing room. I'm nearly tempted to have my way with Sasuke against the mirrors, right here and now, but the damn stylists decide to dress us in new, simpler kimono. They drag him into the next room before ripping the layers off of me. They keep the warm layer and slide on a royal blue, silky kimono. I always thought that I would wear a yukata for my first big festival, but who am I to complain?

Sasuke comes back in when he's done. He was given a deep red kimono, the color making his eyes glow. Maybe that's also why I'm in blue, but don't quote me on it. It's not like I know everything about fashion and even less about traditional dress!

With a practiced flick of his hand, he dismisses all of the workers. He's the perfect little clan boy, he is.

"Did you like your birthday present, dobe?" So that's what that was, huh?

"Happy birthday to me," I haven't had a happier one, that's for certain.

"Sure. Come with me," He takes my hand and pulls me back out to the balcony, "Most of the stands are up already."

"Wow, the sun's setting already? What time is it?" The bright oranges in the sky make me long for my comfy track suit.

"It's only five-thirty, and the festival begins at six," I guess time flies by when you're fulfilling all your life's dreams in one day!

"Perfect! Now you and I can spend a few quiet moments together, away from the adoring fans," I slide my hand over his, and he smoothly laces his fingers in mine. Together, we step up to the spot where Sasuke told off Sweetie.

"Quiet? Don't promise the impossible, dobe," That's it, your hand's being squeezed, bastard! But only for a second, I don't feel like being accused of abusing my boyfriend so early in the game.

So for the half-hour we have free, we quietly watch the stands being put up, the children running around in their small kimono. In the sunset, all the bobbing heads were haloed with orange. There wasn't a single villager who was still in the last minutes of preparations, but other than the occasional order, all was silent. Even he and I only spoke in whisper occasionally.

My old friend, my new lover. My old villagers, my new era.

* * *

><p>A thundering crack marked the beginning of the festival, but Sasuke and I can't see where it's coming from. We're being carried in an elaborate vehicle by some men. They told me it was called a 'litter'.<p>

"Meow, Sasuke, don't you like our litter box?" He's sitting across from me since there's no room next to me, but we're close enough that our knees are touching. Luckily, we don't sway much. The guys carrying us were man-beasts who daylight as carpenters. Tazuna's among them, despite his grandson's protests about potentially throwing out his back.

"I've nearly had my fill of showy fanfare for one day," With a delicate finger, he pushing the curtain back slightly so he can see out the window. I do the same so I can see the thick crowd merging towards us. We're going so slowly that we've come to a standstill.

"Come on! We haven't even started the festival and you're already acting like a tired old man," I slide a hand up from his knee to the middle of his thigh. He raises an eyebrow and let's the curtain close. With the couple minutes we have left alone, we stay attached at the lips. Obviously, we can't do much more than that, but we don't need anything more. I'm so aware of my heart pumping, all of my tingling nerves and tightening muscles. I push a hand against his chest so I can feel the excited pounding in his chest.

We could do this for an hour, but it still wouldn't say enough.

Once we're in the center of town, which also serves as the stage for the festival's bands, they open the doors for us. With the men still holding us up, I hop out of the stuffy compartment. That probably wasn't very dignified of me, eh? So, to make up for it, I hold my hand out to guide the elegant Uchiha down from the door. Some girls, who I recognized as being Sasuke fan girls when we were in the Academy, started swooning at the my display of "chivalry".

"Hey, before we start this up, I have to ask everyone one question!" I yell out to the crowd, and they all yell back "What?" in unison.

"Where the hell can a man get some ramen?" The crowd burst out in a new wave of cheers and laughter, and half of them point down the road towards Ichiraku's stand. They make way for Sasuke and I to get to my favorite food joint. It takes him pointing out the little details, like the paper lanterns and the game stands, for me to really soak in the festival. He knows very well that I'm too busy dancing on Cloud Nine.

"Teuchi, I swear, you should be hired as my personal chef!" I greet the old man by running behind the counter and giving him a back-crushing hug.

"Naruto! I've been waiting for you to show up! I've got a good line up for you tonight! Look at what Ayame brought in from her last trip!" He sets two huge bowls of ramen down on the counter, one for Sasuke and one for me. On top, four oysters float back-to-back, and underneath that is some perfect pork cutlets and jumbo shrimp.

"Naruto, I knew you were going to come!" Ayame comes out from the bathroom in Ichiraku, drying her hands on her apron. I give her a hug, too, but I make a beeline for my ramen. Sasuke's already breaking his chopsticks apart and holding them. I break mine quickly, yell out "Itadakimasu!" then dig into the best ramen of my life!

I've never really eaten oysters before, but these are surprisingly good! Gummy, but good. I ask for twenty more oysters and my usual miso ramen to wrap up eating. Sasuke doesn't eat quickly, but somehow I only count seven oysters on the plate when I suck down my last noodles. Then again, Sasuke's more into seafood than I am.

"I always knew you could do it, Naruto, my boy," No, I'm not mistaken, there really are tears in the old man's eyes. I feel my eyes well up as I stand up and shake his hand and say my goodbyes. I wipe them away when Sasuke and I walk down the rows of stands. When I let my arm down, Sasuke takes my hand.

"Win me something," He plants me in front of a stand. The spiky-haired worker doesn't even look up when he tells us the obvious rules. Throw the ball, get it through the passing hoops. Simple as that.

"Shikamaru, can't you at least seem excited for my own damn festival?" I knock him over the head and he stands up like a wound-up toy.

"Naruto! Ah, man, sorry. And congratulations," He smiles at me and even gives an approving nod to Sasuke. His earlier spectacle must've earned him brownie points from the Rookie Nine.

"Thanks! You may not think so, but you really helped me get here. But now, you just have to take my money," I pass him the dollar for the game, but he pushes it away.

"Are you kidding? Why would I take the Hokage's money at his own festival? Ino, would kill me. This is her stand, you know. It's troublesome, but she and Chouji were mysteriously busy, so I got wrangled into subbing," He hands me the balls and turns on the game machine. For a second, I worried about making a fool of myself and somehow screwing up, but I get through every hoop perfectly.

"All that training actually amounted to something," Sasuke teases me dryly, so I ruffle the back of his head.

"Pick something, you ungrateful bastard!" I ask, but he's already telling Shikamaru what to pull down from the shelves.

"The bonsai. You need plants for your office, right?" Hey, since when did he know about my green thumb?

"Want me to keep a hold of it?" Shika asked as he placed the tiny tree in front of us.

"Send it to his office whenever you get the chance," Sasuke gently strokes the leaves and the small branches before taking my hand again.

"See you later, Shika!" I wave behind me as we walk from stand to stand.

The next group we run into is the Dragon Knights. We're both prepared for a fight, but they all drop to the ground and start apologizing before we can get out a word. They all give us their well-wishes, and tell us that they'll try to get Sweetie to "see the light," too.

"You can start trusting me once I've been in office for a while, okay?" I tell them all, and they all agree profusely, bowing to me and shaking my hand. They all scurry away from us. I'm not really sure that I should disregard them now, but I doubt I'll have time to worry about their theories with all the work I have to do. No, instead, Sasuke and I return to walking through our village.

We get free stuff at every one, and some things from people on the street. I wasn't prepared for the amount of autographs I was going to sign, and neither was Sasuke. Nine times out of ten, he was being asked by a girl. A few even boldly asked if they could see us kiss, but I shooed them away nicely before Sasuke could go postal. Many of the kids ran up and tugged on my kimono, wanting my attention and praise for things they had won. After the tenth round of "Find the Kid's Parents", Sasuke and I were beat. We had passed every stand, every person, and it seemed like our arms couldn't hold the bags of stuff we'd gotten.

"The fireworks are going to start soon. Should we find some place to sit?" He was really asking me 'Can we get away from these crazy people and put down these bags before my arms fall off?'. There's no way he'd really say that, but that's what I was about to say if he didn't.

"The mountain should be the best place, right?" I'm thinking about grassy area, behind where Tsunade's head is carved.

"That's just what I was thinking," Sasuke nodded, and we both took to the rooftops. Without being hindered by the hoard, we make it to the top in five minutes. I peel off the fancy kimono and fold it into one of the bags, and Sasuke does the same. I flop onto my back and roll in the grass.

"Is it wet?"

"Not at all. I guess they haven't had much rain lately," I shove my arms behind my head and stare up at the stars. Sasuke lays down and uses my stomach as a pillow. After a moment of thought, I let one of my arms out and reach to run my hand through his hair. A couple leaves had fallen in, so I work to peel the small dried pieces out.

"When do the fireworks start?" I ask him after a few minutes of relaxing silence.

"Probably not for another twenty minutes," He rolls his head to look at me, and it makes his bangs fall over his lips and chin.

"They can wait," I mutter, pushing the black hairs away. Slowly, I sit up onto my elbows, trying not to disturb him too much. It doesn't matter anyway, he switches his position the second I started moving. He places a curled finger under my chin and lifts it into a deep kiss. Though my eyes are closed, I can feel him straddle me, pressing our chests together.

Just kissing his mouth isn't enough. On a whim, I push his robe open and off of his shoulders. The weight of the sleeves pulls them off of his upper body entirely, exposing all of his skin to my wandering mouth. I want to be slow and loving, but one moan from him breaks all of my self-imposed strings. With one arm on the ground for support, I grind upwards. He smirks and rolls his hips in time with my thrusts.

To distract me, he kisses me again. Our tongues get involved the moment we make contact, and we can't even be bothered to breath through our noses. Our quick breaths run into each other every time we pull apart. He unties my robe and pulls it open unceremoniously, and I follow his example.

Something comes over me once I have his robes open. Shoving him onto his back, I grab onto the waistband of the shorts they let him wear underneath. Before he's recovered from being pushed away, I have his shorts off and flung towards our bags. He's still wearing another damn layer, his short black boxers, so I grab them, too. That Sasuke, he even pushes his hips up from the ground so I can get them off of him! His kimono has become more like a blanket for his body. Every inch of his skin glows in the light from the thin crescent moon.

With feather-light touches, I skim my hands over his smooth thigh, over his hipbones, onto his stomach. I follow the same path, but this time with kisses. My eyes stay glued to his proud cock the whole trip around his lower body, and I can tell that the lack of attention to it was frustrating Sasuke. To make up for it, I pull myself up a bit and lower my mouth over the head.

Now it's my turn to be surprised. Though he lets me suck him a couple times, he's quick to push me back. Wordlessly, he pulls my clothes off and tosses them aside, not leaving me a stitch of clothing. Red eyes drink up every bit of me, from my hair to my painfully hard erection, down to my grass-hidden knees, then back up.

"Warm weather we're having, huh?" I smirk. I'm pretty damn sure he likes what he sees.

"Really?" He tries to sound sarcastic, but he doesn't have enough air to pull it off.

"What? Would you rather I ramble about all the things I love about you, starting with how great you look without clothes?" I slide my warm hands down his sides, stopping at his jutting hips. He gasps lightly and lays his forehead against mine.

"Show me instead, like you always do."

I don't need to be told twice. Reading all of those magazines prepared me enough for what to do here. All I have to figure out is what to use as lube, though my mind is currently mush. If he would take his hand off my cock for two seconds, maybe I could think of something!

"Wait up, teme," I pant, and it takes him a second before he willingly sits back on his kimono. The promise in his flushed cheeks leads me to rip through the bags in search of something, anything useable. Finally, my fingers wrap around a bottle that's been in there for a while.

"Aloe vera?" I move back to him, wondering if it was safe.

"You've got to be kidding me." Sasuke wipes a hand down his face, "Don't you remember what that Toad Sage said? 'Aloe vera! So that's what that's for!'"

My eyes wide, I stare at Sasuke, then the bottle, then back to Sasuke. "He knew? He predicted that we'd use this as lube?"

"Never mention it to anybody ever, dobe," Sasuke shakes his head, "But don't get distracted."

I motioned to my cock, "Does it look like I'm gonna get distracted? No, now lay back," He looks a bit confused as he goes back onto the kimono. All's made pretty clear to him when he hears me flicking the cap open; he flinches at the sound. I gently knead his thighs, then slide my hands between them. He wavers a bit, but he lets me spread his legs apart.

I don't want him freaking out, that's the last thing I want. It's just experimental, but I think it's best if I blow him while trying to prepare him. I can only imagine what I'd be like in his position right now, so I try to be as considerate as possible. When he feels the first aloe-slickened finger push past the tight ring of muscles, his whole body shudders.

He finds a calming rhythm for rolling his hips into my mouth and against my finger, so soon I can add another one.

"Ngh!" He groans as I start gently moving my fingers into him, out of him, scissoring to loosen the muscles. Taking him out of my mouth, I crawl up to kiss him. He bites and kisses my lower lip, then sucks my tongue into his mouth. While he lets me dominate him, he starts rocking harder against my fingers. He's still pretty tight, but I'm sure it'll always be like that.

"Ready when you are," I whisper into his ear, and he nods. I slip my fingers out and look down at him. An idea pops into my head, and I impulsively act on it. With just a quick tug, I'm the one on my back and he's straddled on top of me.

"I don't want to end up going too fast and hurting you," I whisper, searching for the lube.

"You do realize, Naruto," From behind his back, Sasuke pulls out the open aloe bottle, "That I've been stabbed by kunai and swords before? As big as you are, I don't think it'll hurt as bad as being a ninja."

"Oh, right," I grin at the ego-bolstering "big" comment. The smile disappears into a moan when Sasuke starts applying the aloe vera to my neglected cock. He makes sure that I'm covered (a bit too sure, if you ask me). Once done, he positions himself above me. He hovers for a bit longer than I thought he would, so I start to speak up. Before I get the question out, I'm answered.

"Almost," Sasuke looks up to the sky and watches a trailing flare fly up and burst into a blue spiral pattern. The fireworks? Sure, but why would Sasuke want to wait for them?

"Given how loud you are normally, I figured that you'd need some sound coverage during this," I was about to protest by saying that I know how to keep quiet, but he takes all of my mind and shoves it south when he pushes me into him.

Good to his word, Sasuke doesn't complain about any pain, but he does pause for a moment. He relaxes himself as best as he can in order to take in all of me. The magazines had said that it's rare for virgins to be able to do that, but it's probably out of pride that Sasuke did.

Without spending too much time adjusting to the feeling, he lifts his hips up, then slides back down. He does this at a slow pace a couple more times, but then I start pushing up. I grab his ass with both hands and support him as he moves faster. If it didn't feel too good to miss, I would've blacked out with pleasure by now.

Though, what I'm feeling must not be anything compared to what's making Sasuke cry out.

"Naruto!" He pants my name and scratches his nails into my chest without thinking. He closes his eyes and lets me hit the same spot over and over again. This was mentioned, I think. Prostate, was it? Sure, whatever, doesn't matter right now. I swear, I'll never say Fuckin' A as a curse ever again!

"Damn it," Sasuke growls before he forcefully pulls us back into our original position, him on the bottom. He wraps his legs around my waist and pulls me into him again. "Be gentle, and I'll kill you," he growls, and I happily comply. My hips piston harshly against the spot, building in speed and strength until I have him screaming my name louder than what the fireworks can cover. He shoves his face against my neck to stifle his outbursts, but my own are getting louder with every thrust.

Nothing short of a sonic boom would be able to cover up his final moans, the ones that start up when I reach in between us and pump him roughly. When he comes, he goes entirely rigid against me. Even if I wanted to pull out before coming, he becomes too tight for me to even think of moving. Instead, everything I have gets released into him. The sheer force, the pure pleasure, it all blinds me for the next few minutes. It's auto-pilot that has me pull out and lay down next to my first-time lover.

"I should've known this would happen," Sasuke murmurs into my chest, as neither one of us is willing to move any further.

"Yeah," I sigh, "Oysters are aphrodisiacs, after all."

* * *

><p>Ye gods, I did it! I wrote a lemon, holy crap. Whether or not it's any good is for you guys to tell me in the reviews *~*~*~*~* Some of you might want to say something about the shortness of this chapter, but say something nice along with it if you're going to complain about the length. I'm a bit busy, and it'll be hard to go on from here. Send me some love, I'll send you some cyber popcorn. I'll have a reviewer's response for the next chapter to make up for the shortness, how about that?<p> 


	17. Post Trial: Occupation

Reviewer Response, as promised! For the sake of time (lol since when have I cared about that?), I only picked those who reviewed the most recent chapter, my lemon XP

**Dashel:** When you said hot and sweet, I thought of food XP I'm glad you weren't mad about the shortness, and that goes for a lot of others. Thanks for sticking around and reviewing so much!

**Emirri: **I read your review and immediately thought of Trollface "U Mad Bro?" because you asked if I was. You were the first one I saw who mentioned how I tread the line between sickeningly sweet and endearing, and that's what I like going for. Thanks!

**Alecksander92: **Ah, so this is a good thing? Yay! Yeah, I know it's so close to being done. I mean, 20 real chapters plus one sub-plot explanation...that's all! This is the 17th! So I'm seriously so happy that it's turning out so well.

**MabuTashi: **I'm glad you lolled (hurrrr~) I'm glad I was believable. And c'mon, admit it, it's just your favorite because of the lemon XP

**BadButt94: **Your loud cheering is still ringing in my ears XP. Best couple ever, really? Well, that's because NaruSasu _IS_ the best couple EVER! Am I right or am I right?

**Greenbeach4: **I might not have paid attention, but I think this is your first review? If it is, thank you! And I'm glad a lot of people noticed that I made Naruto being considerate. I always saw him being that way to others in canonverse.

**Operagirl76: **Super happy birthday for Naruto, I agree! But I did like my own little touch that randomly popped in my head, the one with Sasuke waiting. I was thinking of going the more cliché route and have them go off when they "saw fireworks" , or climaxed XP

**DNLover02: **I read your review and went "AWWWWWWW YEEEAAAAHH" like the internet meme XP And indeed, I have a kink for Sasuke riding Naruto. Look forward to the next chapter (wink-wink)

**Thanks for your patience and also for taking your time to review! I know I'm busy, so I can imagine that you are, too! But if you ever feel like saying something, you know I love dem reviews XP Cyber popcorn galore! *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***

**Trials has over 12,000 views and it's my most favorited story, and 135 reviews! (**Do you know how much it killed me to type most favorited?)

No ownie the Naruto. Now onto the next addition to The Trials!

* * *

><p><em>Post Trial: Occupation<em>

I refuse to do it. It may take all of my will power, but I will not give him the satisfaction!

_I will not limp!_

With every step I take, I'm reminded fiercely of our "rendezvous", as Naruto calls it. I ignore the throbbing as long as I can, but I can't stay sitting for so long. Something tells me that Naruto can read my expression. He eyes keep flicking over to me as he eats the omelette I made him. After battling with my pride, I shakily stand up and move to our new stove, my back to Naruto and my hands on the counter.

"Did you sleep well? I like the bed that they put in there, but I thought it would be too soft for your tastes," Naruto asks me, but I can hear the underlying amusement. He knows damn well that a firm bed would've exacerbated my "condition."

"It'll do," I grumble. I admit, I'm being a bit unfair to him, but if he's daring to poke at my pride, he'll never be able to repeat last night's events.

"In that case," When I wasn't looking, he got up and slipped his arms around me. His warm chest presses against my bare back, as we both only went to bed with shorts on. "Thanks for breakfast, Sasuke."

"If you really want to thank me, wash your plate before we leave for work," Everything is going a bit fast, but yes, today is our first day. The realization makes Naruto's arms tighten around me slightly, but he relaxes soon enough. Gently, he turns me to face him and kisses my expectant lips.

I always thought that eggs were supposed to make you taste bad. He just always tastes like Naruto.

"Gah, fucker!" I yelp so loudly that Naruto checks my back for burn marks. He had pressed against me, so my ass got pushed by the corner of the oven. In other words, that hurt like hell!

"What was that?"

"Shut up," No amount of self-control could hide my reddening face from Naruto's teasing gaze.

"Well, I'm sorry about the symptoms, but not the cause," He grins broadly and rubs my lower back. He tries getting frisky, but I push him back against the breakfast island as soon as one hand brushed my abused ass.

"Alright, alright, I'll stop teasing," Naruto throws up his hands defensively and fruitlessly tries to smother his laughter.

"If you don't, there won't be a repeat performance," Well, that worked. I had to catch myself before I relished my new power over the dobe. It's no surprise that some people assumed that I manipulate Naruto with sex. It's a hellishly persuasive tool, if all emotion is taken away.

"I'd like to see you try to keep your hands off me," He bends in and plants a quick kiss on my forehead before flitting off into the bedroom. I also had to get changed, so I follow him after a cleaning up a bit in the kitchen.

He shamelessly stares as I pull off my sleep clothes and throw on my usual shinobi outfit. Naruto, on the other hand, can't figure out what he's supposed to wear.

"How does a Hokage dress for work? All I know about is the optional robes and weird triangle hat!" Naruto pulls and grabs at his orange jumpsuit.

"Wear whatever makes you comfortable," I ease myself over to him, not wanting to agitate my sore body. "You became the Hokage by being your obnoxious self, so why can't you just dress like you normally would?"

"You know what, Sasuke? You're right," Of course I am. "It's not like they can fire me for not wearing formal kimonos or whatever! Hell, I can do paperwork in my underwear!"

"You'd be making my job very difficult if you did. I'm supposed to keep you from getting distracted, not becoming the distraction," Now that I think about it, the Hokage's office doesn't have those wall-covering windows anymore. . .

"Aw man! And here I was, looking forward to our lunch-break quickies in my office!" He snaps his fingers and makes an attempt to look genuinely disappointed.

"It's almost as if you're trying to schedule that sort of thing. I was expecting you to be more spontaneous than that, dobe. Are you saying you don't want to do anything during the recesses of important meetings, after mission assignments, or after you finish a project? You're not going to call me in to blow you from under the desk while you sign some pointless papers?" I can't continue on with my suggestions. If Naruto gets any more turned on than I can already see, he'll make my limp too obvious to hide. I absolutely refuse to show up on my first day with "UKE" stamped on my forehead.

"Sasuke?" Naruto swallows thickly, and I detect some nervousness in his eyes. Without words, it's easy to know what he's asking.

"After work, if you aren't too fatigued by all the work that's already piling on your desk. For now, get your robes on," I brush past him and take the white robe from the dresser. I open it and hold it for him. He slides his arms in, closes the robes, then goes to the mirror to see the results. While he's freezing up from shock, I gently place the hat on him to finish the transformation.

"If Tsunade could do this with a sake bottle in her hand at all times, you have nothing to worry about. You're going to be an amazing Hokage, Naruto," I wrap my arms around his waist and bury my face in his relaxing shoulder.

"Yeah," Naruto looks up and grins, then speaks louder, "Yeah! Come on, Sasuke! Let's do this!"

* * *

><p>"Fuckin' A, make it stop!" Naruto smacks his head down as I place the next set of papers in his "To Do" pile. As it turns out, villages in the middle of rebuilding need many zoning and work contracts given out. Plus, there's the matter of all of the technically homeless people who're staying in a large commune of tents. Despite the groaning, Naruto gives little smiles every time he gets to sign a document.<p>

"Get to it. I scanned the top page, and I gathered that these are mainly papers about building a new arena. Which is good, since I think your pupil needs to take the Chuunin exams soon."

"My pupil?" Naruto pops back up. The dobe had inadvertently dropped his forehead into a small puddle of ink. I scoff and reach into my back pouch for a cloth I normally use for wiping blood off my sword.

"Konohamaru, was it?" I dip the cloth into an untouched glass of water that I had given him earlier. He doesn't flinch when I lift his chin up and scrub at the black mark. When it was sufficiently cleared, I pulled the cloth back. Naruto grabs my forearm before it can get too far and stares at me with what I can recognize as longing. He can't get distracted, but I pity him enough to lightly kiss the red skin of his forehead. I pull back before he could try to escalate this to something much more time-consuming.

"You're not even to the worst part yet, Naruto. We have our first in-office meeting with the elders at fourteen o'clock," I tap at my pocket, the one that holds my Assistant notebook. Naruto groans again and rolls his eyes before taking the first paper off of the pile. His brow furrows as he scans over the rigid kanji.

I could see us just like this ten, twenty years down the line.

I'm staring. I probably should leave him to his work.

"I'll bring you more ink," I crack the door open before I think to add, "Hokage-sama."

The slam of the door was the only warning I had of the attack. My quick reaction time allowed me to open my mouth before my lips could be wrenched apart by his tongue. Hands that should be signing documents were instead gripping my hair and bruising my hip bones.

When Naruto pulls away, he has a strange expression on his face. I would usually describe it as "lustful surprise", but my rattled mind can only work enough to think the words "sexy" and "mine".

"For safety's sake," Naruto lets out a shivering breath, "Please, don't call me that unless I'm allowed to fuck you on the nearest surface." He backs away from me, but my wide eyes can't let go of him. As sore as I am, I can't help but want to give in to him.

No. He's busy, I'm busy, we have to cool off.

"N-noted, dobe," Damn, when have I ever stuttered! "Now, get back to your desk. I'll be back before the meeting."

"What about my ink?" He tilts his head, smirking at my obvious arousal. Like hell am I going to be a push-over.

"You should have enough, and if not, check the drawers. I have my own work to do, so if you would excuse me," I pull myself up and swiftly open the door for myself.

I blow right past the guards outside the door, hoping that they don't see the my flustered blushing.

* * *

><p>When I return to him, after collecting data from the hospital, Naruto is pacing around the room. He has out a kunai, which he's flipping around as if it's a butterfly knife, switching its positions from offensive to defensive. He stops when I sit down onto the sofas they brought in for the meeting.<p>

"Just remember, Naruto, you're invincible to them. It's your first day, so you're untouchable," I try my hand at comforting him. He sighs and sinks into the seat next to me.

"Excuse me?" Kotetsu, who has become amicable after the inauguration, pops his head in, "Should I bring some tea in here?"

"Gah!" Naruto smacks his forehead, "Yes, yes, please get that! I'm so stupid, how could I've forgotten tea?"

"You forgot it because it's not your job to remember. It's not my job, either," I cross my arms, "There are some tasks that are performed by the lower ranks. If you were supposed to fetch your own tea, it would be like the feudal lord needing to do his own dishes."

"That's how this works, Hokage-sama," Izumo joins Kotetsu in the doorway carrying a pot of tea and cups, which he sets down on the small table between the couches.

"Thanks, guys," Naruto lets himself relax against the cushion, "How are your living arrangements?"

"We're staying together, actually," I don't need my Eternal Mangekyou to see the light flush of Kotetsu's cheeks, "It's a small apartment, but it's better than what most people have."

"I know about the commune, but I've never been in there very much. I know Sakura is staying among them as a volunteer medic, but she never told me the conditions."

"Well, we're getting close to winter now, so a lot of people are worrying about getting too much snow. Last year, we only got an inch or two of it the whole season," They stand side by side near the door, which is respectful and customary. Naruto, not being one for customs, motions for them to take a seat on the other couch.

"Are you sure?" Izumo asks warily, quirking one eyebrow.

"Consider it an order, that way you can point the finger at me," Naruto grins and pours tea and offers it to them. I guess we'll have to send for a couple more cups later on.

"Thank you," They say in unison before taking a sip.

"Would it be possible to make a temporary boarding house for everyone before it gets too cold?" Naruto blows on his tea before drinking.

"It may be asking a lot to get something like that erected in the seven weeks we have before December," I patiently wait for my tea to cool down before picking it up.

"If Yamato would use his Mokuton every day, we could build something bigger than the feudal lord's estate!" My hyperactive boyfriend decides to pace around the room again after gulping back his hot tea.

"That may be true, but the elders may have different plans. They were having the construction workers focus on rebuilding the stores," Last time I walked through town, I saw that we had plenty of businesses up and running. How could we possibly need any more of them?

"Are you kidding me? To hell with that!"

"What would 'that' be, Uzumaki-dono?" Koharu rasps as she and Mitokado enter the room. With a flick of my eyes, I dismiss Kotetsu and Izumo. They jump up from their seats, bow deeply to the elders, and then scurry out before Koharu's glare lights them on fire.

"'That' is what we're going to be discussing, I imagine. Our action plan."

"Yes, we'll get to that. But first, we must elaborate on your clerical duties," Mitokado grunts as he takes the seat that Kotetsu abandoned.

"Clerical duties? Those should fall under my list of tasks," Only one minute in, and I'm already suspicious of what they want to assign Naruto.

"Usually, that would be the case. However, as Uzumaki-dono is such a young Kage, he should familiarize himself with the different departments that keep the village running smoothly."

"Call me Naruto, would ya? I love the titles and the sudden respect, but it's not like I've changed," He scratches at the back of his head nervously before darting to sit down next to me. It wouldn't last long, as I slip out and come back in with more tea cups.

"We'll compromise," Mitokado's brow relaxes a fraction, "Koharu and I will call you Uzumaki, then."

"Better," Naruto shrugs pours himself some tea, and starts sputtering when he realizes that he doesn't have tea cups for them. Already on it, I place them on the table and pour the elders their drinks.

"What do these duties entail?" Half of the difficulty of my position will come from keeping the dobe on one train of thought for longer than second.

"Uzumaki will be expected to visit each of the departments and the hospital for half an hour each. Afterwards, he will write a report about his observations, what tasks they were performing, and one suggestion for improvement," Koharu sips at her tea disdainfully, screwing her already-narrow eyes even further shut.

"Don't you think that would take too much time away from his more pressing tasks, such as the village's restoration?"

"It's okay, Sasuke. I can handle a little bit more work," His back stiffens before addressing the elders. "What we need to talk about is these homeless people..."

* * *

><p>For an hour, Naruto tried to explain how our economy wasn't nearly as important as taking care of the people living in the village. He made great points, all were valid and well-supported. It didn't stop them from figuratively stuffing cotton in their ears. Luckily, Naruto never gives up a fight. So, albeit grudgingly, the elders green-lighted his plan for building a boarding house.<p>

"It baffles me that we can have a fully restored Ninja Academy, but so few homes for the villagers," I growl, leaning on his desk. The elders had left as soon as they finished explaining all of Naruto's assignments, so it was just Naruto and I in the room once more.

"We lost a lot of our shinobi during the war. It just makes sense to make raising the new generation a big priority. Right?" Once again, he catches me by surprise with his moments of intelligent clarity.

"So, you do have a level head. You had me fooled," I smirk, and he whacks my stomach in retaliation. Almost apologetically, he pulls me down into his lap and buries his face against my back.

"I've been that way for a while," His words are muffled, but loud enough for me to hear. "It started when I confessed to you, actually. As weird as it sounds, it felt like somebody took a chain off my mind that I wasn't even aware of before it was gone."

"At the risk of sounding overemotional, I'll tell you that I felt the same way. That time in the cell was my first moment of clarity since the end of the war. Since then, I haven't regressed at all," I stroke a small circle in one of the arms he has wrapped around my waist.

"Damn it, Sasuke," His warm breath fans over my back. "Why do you have to be sore?"

I answer without thinking, "I've been okay for a couple hours now." I don't even have to turn around to see the dirty leer on his face.

"Can't we just go home now?" The suggestive tone has me torn between two options: run away from Naruto for professional purposes, or grind back against the hard-on I can already feel forming beneath his robes.

A knock at the door made the decision for me. I glance over at the clock and see that we only have one minute to go to the mission assignment room.

* * *

><p>After the eighteenth genin mission assignment, all D ranks, Naruto's usual fidgeting comes to a complete halt. Though it's only six at night, his eyelids droop and then fling open when he catches himself. We still have about two more hours of work to do. That dobe needs to wake up or we'll already be starting off on a bad note.<p>

Now, there's only one thing that I've ever used to wake up, for those times where Taka would be moving for hours without sleep. Coffee, and lots of it, is the only substance that can keep me awake for three days straight.

If that's what it does to me, what could it do to Naruto?

Damn it, he's snoring! I guess it's my only option. Slipping out of the room, I go and brew him some coffee in the lounge. I get some looks from the female workers in there, and I recognize them as being their attempt at flirty. Now, what would drive these girls to want me even though they saw my confession just yesterday?

"Excuse me, Uchiha-san?" One of the giggly women addresses me. I'm trying my hand at being more approachable to the workers here, so I turn around.

"Hn?"

"Did you confess to Uzumaki-san first, or did he confess to you?" What? I would've accused her of being invasive if we hadn't made everything so public.

"As you could probably guess, he confessed first," Trying to seem more casual than how I'm feeling, I put my hands in my pockets and lean back against the counter. The small dripping sound of the coffee gives me something to focus on instead of the girls' whispers.

"You're right, that was pretty obvious," The second woman chuckled before asking her own question. "Hey, Uchiha-san, do you even remember us?" I shook my head to tell her I didn't, "No surprise there, I guess. We were two of your admirers from the Academy. You never even looked at us once, didn't say a single word. But still, we thought we loved you."

"What she's trying to say is that we're happy for you. And, to be honest, we're happy you turned out to be gay. It made up for all of those moments of obsessing about becoming your girlfriend, and all the tears we cried when we failed over and over." I have problems conceptualizing how many girls cried over me without ever having a conversation with me, but

"I guess some of you can find some solace in thinking that it wasn't because you weren't good enough, it's just that I would never be interested in women. However, it wouldn't be the full truth."

"Tell us!" They yelped together, and my ears want to bleed. Oh, well, at least it won't be hard to break the news to them.

"I'm not with Naruto because he's a man, or because he's the Hokage. He is a dobe, but at least he got to know me. As long as someone gets to know me, they're allowed to feel any way they want about me," I shrug and pour Naruto's coffee into a dark green mug.

"But didn't you two hate each other before?" The first woman spoke softly, most likely in defense. I sweeten the coffee and put in enough creamer to make Naruto able to stand the bitterness. Once I finish stirring the drink, I position myself near the door.

"Perhaps someday you two will learn that no emotion is clear cut. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to get this to Naruto," I nod my head slightly after giving my small token of experience, which I do not give often.

Moving as swiftly as I can without burning myself with coffee, I get back to Naruto. Just in time, too, as he's already drooling on his desk. He managed to push through mission assignments, at least, so it's just him and me in the room.

"Oi, Sasssss," Naruto moans out-loud, "Get me ramen!"

"No, just coffee," Rolling my eyes, I jab a finger into his cheek. He opens one eye and squints at me.

"Coffee?" Yes, dumb ass. Despite my better judgment, I'll resort to giving you coffee.

"Drink it. You still have scrolls to sign, and then you're done. Unfortunately, it'll take an hour at least," I nudge the cup closer to his hand, and he sits up and takes it. He takes it and chugs it even though it was still steaming.

"Dobe!" I stop the coffee from getting on me and all over his robes when he chokes and coughs some of it out, but I couldn't stop it from making a mess of the table. Once again, I had to pull out my cloth.

"After this, you need to buy me a new cloth," I grumble, but Naruto doesn't respond. At least, not properly. In the same second that I feel his hand slapping my ass, I backhand him out of his chair.

"Ooh, that hurt, baby," What the hell! I scramble away from him before he could pull me down to the ground with him. He pulls himself up languidly and presses a hand to the bruise forming on his cheek.

"Heh, Sasuke, wouldn't you rather use that aggression for something more fun?" He takes a few steps towards me, so I back up further. He laughs again, but it's not his usual laughter. Now that I'm not so pissed off, I notice the slight twitch of one of his eyes.

Coffee was a mistake.

"Work can wait, Sasuke," I push him away before he can press himself to me.

"No, dobe, it can't. I gave you the coffee so you wouldn't leave more spit than ink on them!" Keeping him at arm's length doesn't stop him from molesting me with his eyes.

"I know what liquid I feel like leaving on you right now, baby," Fucking gross, Naruto! So, coffee turns you into a douche bag?

"Go do your work!"

"Pleasuring you is part of my work. Now, be a good boy and put your hands on the desk, please," With more strength than I was expecting, Naruto pulls on my arms and tries to bend me over the desk. I struggle violently, kicking and trying to hit him with my head, but I can't get him off me.

"You dumb ass!" I growl and flip him over the desk with my legs, then tackle him to the floor and pin him there. He enjoys it way too damn much, so I punch him in the stomach and knock the wind out of him.

"Sasuke," He wheezes out finally, "I'm alright, okay? Please, I'm fine, I'm done," Warily, I stand up. After taking a short breather on the floor, he stands up, too.

"Work, right?" He rubs his stomach and face, his expression devoid of all creepiness.

"Yeah, work."

* * *

><p>So, not only is coffee a bad idea for Naruto, it also makes him have moments of perverted insanity. One minute, I'm placing papers on his table and he's not even looking up from the desk. Next thing I know, his hand slides between my legs and grazes over my inner thigh.<p>

This is one of the off moments.

"Just a bit more, Sasuke. I'm nearly done!"

"Hurry up, dobe!"

"Almost, almost!"

"You aren't even doing it right."

I grab the last scrolls he had to sign and reorganize them. He didn't remember that scrolls that need to go departments went into a separate pile from the ones that go to other villages.

"Ah, right," Naruto shook his head. "Hey, that reminds me!"

"What?" I flick my eyes and look into his. As soon as I see that glint, I know that Perverted Naruto was making an appearance again.

"For an uke, you sure have a big cock," What a riveting observation, Naruto, thanks for sharing it. Can you shut the fuck up now?

"Whatever, can you finish up here so we can go home?"

"You know, why don't you go ahead of me? You could get yourself undressed, grab the lube I have in the bed-side table, and start preparing yourself for me," he waggles his eyebrows, but I stand my ground.

"I'm not leaving you alone in this state," I flatten my voice, as difficult as it is to stop the quivering in my throat.

"So I'll just have to hurry along, now, won't I?" Shit, I didn't even notice that he was done! Without missing a beat, he takes a hold of my hand and pulls me against him. His hands roam around me and under my clothes as his lips work against mine.

I . . . I guess we could, I mean, he's done with his work. If we could get home first, then maybe we will. If he would just stop touching. . .

"Let's go," I didn't mean for it to sound like a moan, but I was too breathless to do any better. He nods and opens the window. We jump up the two stories it takes to get to our home's level.

"Naruto?" I ask him as he starts stripping off my shirt in our foyer, "Is our house soundproof?"

"Why, do you plan on being a screamer tonight?" he teases me before running his tongue over one of my nipples.

"Haa!" I jump a bit as I'm stripped from the waist down in one quick motion. I have to hold myself against Naruto to keep the cold air from touching my heated skin.

Wait, why am I completely stripped and he still has even his robes on? Angrily, I pull at his clothes until he takes everything off. He pulls our bare bodies together as soon as he could, and spends some time leaving fresh marks on my neck. When he pulls back, I check his eyes for any sign of Weird Naruto.

Thankfully, he's not there. Now I can actually enjoy this without feeling sexually abused.

"Our bed needs broken in more than our front door, Naruto," I press a hand against his shoulder. Instead of heading towards the bedroom, he slides his hands behind my thighs and lifts me up around his waist. His cock is so close; does he really intend on fucking me in the foyer without any preparation?

I lean down and kiss him, preparing for the searing pain of being entered without lube. However, I'm suddenly not pressed against the wall. Naruto's carrying me?

I really need to stop underestimating Naruto.

Next thing I become aware of is the soft blankets against my back and the pillow under my head. Immediately after that comes the sensation of being bitten. I look down to see Naruto's teeth and tongue marking my inner thigh. What turns me on isn't being marked, but his possessive stare. Even when he moves down to lick and suck my cock, he never breaks eye contact.

Just like last night, I'm not thinking straight. My breath doesn't even seem to go down to my lungs and all the outlines around the room are out of focus. My heartbeat pounds in time with Naruto's sucks. And now I'm panting, panting and moaning, moaning and mewling, even if it ruins my dignity. What kind of dignity can you hold on to if you're being prepared by thrusting fingers?

The slick fingers spread apart and press harder and deeper with every thrust.

And without any warning, he's hitting that hellishly sensitive spot. Despite my crying out, he doesn't stop moving until I can't stand it anymore. His tongue laps one last time on the tip, and my control is broken.

Oh for fuck's sake!

On his face?

"No, don't you fucking – Dobe!" Before I have any say in it, Naruto's already licking my cum off his face. His chin, his nose, both cheeks; I'm lucky I didn't hit his eyes!

"What? It's worth it just to see your blush," He grinned and grabbed the lube again. I flip him on his back and take the lube from him.

"Oi, I prepared you for a reason!"

"Shut up," I roll my eyes before spreading the lube onto his cock. He breaths a long sigh of relief, as though he was that fucking scared about being the uke.

"So you're going to ride me again?" He grins and grabs my ass with both hands, positioning me over his cock. I'm a bit shaky (it is only my second time. . .), so I lean forward and kiss Naruto. He relaxes under me, which is good for both of us. If he's nervous at all, this won't turn out well.

But if he fell asleep, it won't happen at all! That damn idiot! I know he had a long day, but you think that he would be able to keep his eyes open for the ten minutes it would take to fuck me!

Then, I remember one vital thing: The worst part about coffee is the crash afterwards.

Fine. I'll just have to make time for it tomorrow.

* * *

><p>Can we say "Writer's Block" and "End of Marking Period Projects"? Both things raped me hard enough for this to be late.<p>

In other news, I hope everyone had a great Halloween, but I'm looking forward to this weekend. My girlfriend is acting in a play and I get to go see her. Everyone tell her good luck in your reviews *~*~*~*

Also, because I want to give people some expectation for timeliness, I'm just hoping really hard that I can have my 20th chapter posted on my birthday, which is December 7th. It'll be my last one, other than the quick subplot summary I'll throw in. And my next chapter should be fun, but it may also be short like my last chapter, as it is mainly a PWP inside a real story. But, rest assured, there will be some plot points in it building up to the final scenes of The Trials!

Thanks for being patient XP


	18. Post Trial: Relaxation

Alright, you know, I do want this done by my birthday. After looking at what I had planned for this chapter, I realized that it wasn't something to wait twenty some days for. Plus, the whole plot for it sounded like a single conversation. So, I'm combining what would be my 18th and 19th chapters. So, it will be 20 chapters total once I include the sub-plot explanation.

Oh, and since I'm skipping what would be a Naruto chapter, this will work out nicely. So now, Sasuke will also have his two-chapter POV.

So yeah, **THIS IS SASUKE'S POV AGAIN**

This fun lemon is based off of a little fantasy I had. Credit for the SasuNaru insert goes to **maxridelover. **I wasn't going to put any in, but I figured out a way to keep myself pleased even with my slight aversion to SasuNaru.

Enjoy the penultimate chapter of The Trials!

Trials 18:

The new stack of paper lands down on Naruto's desk with a resounding _thunk_. By now, the poor idiot's too tired to muster up a groan. Instead, he only mutters about needing more coffee. I don't see why he even bothers asking; coffee stopped working a week ago. It coincided with the elder's decision to add calligraphy lessons to his daily gauntlet of duties. Nonetheless, I get him some espresso, which seems to be the only viable caffeine drink.

If I didn't have my own laundry list of tasks, I'd spend more time trying to console him. In just the past month, he's aged twenty years. Not physically, of course, but you can see the fatigue in the bruised pouches under his eyes.

On my next trip into his office, I have to catch myself before I curse aloud. Those fuckers are back, looking smug as ever! I would sort a thousand scrolls if it meant that I could put them into the most excruciating, tortuous Tsukiyomi imaginable. I'd start with Koharu, with a thousand senbons for each eye, for just the first ten hours, then I'd get a lion and...

"Oh, Uchiha! You're just in time. We've got a new report for you two."

"Let me guess, it's more rumors about ninja leaving their villages in protest of the Shinobi Alliance," I sit in my chair behind Naruto's desk and scoff. It's seems like every week, the elders come in to milk these rumors for all they're worth.

"I've heard about it from Gaara, already. The Land of Earth is closer to them, so the defected shinobi have affected him more," Naruto sighs and continues scribbling information down on scrolls.

"Yes, but have you heard of the the possibilities of an Akatsuki copy-cat beginning to form near Kusagakure?" Mitokado's making it sound bigger than it is. No shinobi even close to Akatsuki's level has shown themselves thus far, with the exception of Naruto and myself.

"We'll do something about it if they make themselves known. I've told you before, these rebellions will die down as soon as the new generation grows up with this system. For now, we don't have the time to worry about them while we're still trying to figure out the politics of a Shinobi Alliance," Without much thought, I stand up and put my hand on Naruto's shoulder, protecting him from their psychological attacks.

"But that's the same mistake that was made before! We can't ignore these shinobi until they become too powerful to stop without a new Shinobi World War!" the old crone screeches at Naruto.

"Will you stop shouting about war when we're in the first time of peace in years?" Lolling his head back, Naruto speaks up again. I don't know what he's thinking, which is rare, but the look he's giving me tells me that I need to get these elders out before he erupts.

"I'll make a deal with you, Koharu-san. If you and Mitokado leave right now, Naruto and I will discuss a plan of action, if there is to be one. Understood?" She considered my offer for a moment, then scoffed and left without another word. That's the only smart thing she's done since I've met the bitch.

Feeling suddenly worn out myself, I slump over and press my forehead against his. If Naruto didn't always feel a lot warmer than me, I would think that all this work has given him a fever.

"Anything on your mind?" I ask quietly. It's unnerving, not knowing what's going on behind those tired eyes.

"A lot of worries," He sighs and reaches a hand to the back of my head. Fiddling with my spikes comforts him, I've found.

"Those shinobi shouldn't worry you. If they do become a nuisance, they will be swiftly dealt with. Just focus on rebuilding this village. Speaking of which, the apartment complex is going well," Hearing of some success may help pull him out of the slump. I know it's not much, but I can't come up with any better ideas.

"I'm more worried about the entire shinobi system," Spinning around his chair, he pulls me down to straddle his lap, facing him. His hands aren't wandering like they usually do.

"The Shinobi Alliance is going well, I thought," Out of a habit that I've developed this past month, I massage his shoulders. Naruto groans appreciatively.

"Kages. That's what I'm rethinking. They're like lines drawn between the villages, you know?" He chuckles drily.

"There always has to be a leader to represent each group. There will always be separate villages, Naruto, with separate leaders," I keep my tone frank as though I'm stating the absolute truth. To be honest, I wouldn't be sad to see the Kage system gone. Nonetheless, I hope he doesn't start questioning it.

"This system is still young, you know. It's only a little over one-hundred years old, right?"

"Considering that the First Hokage is Tsunade's grandfather, I'd say that's true. You should've paid better attention when they were teaching history at the Academy, dobe," I speak softly so I don't gain a place on his list of problems.

"Whatever, teme," Naruto grips my thighs tightly. With how little attention he's been giving me, this is quite welcome.

"Look, Naruto. The villages have their own Wills, like Konoha's Will of Fire. They have their leaders, their histories, their cultures. This Alliance is everyone's chance to show who they are without fear of being spied on or attacked by another village. The Kages have become co-workers."

"So long as we have a common enemy. If you haven't noticed, we don't have any threats. Konoha is weak now because of the construction, but people are _still _scared of Kyuubi. The other villages won't attempt anything because of it," His brow furrows again. He's been doing it enough to cause a fine crease in his skin, not quite a wrinkle, to appear above the bridge of his nose.

"Or, maybe, they just don't have any reason to attack us. In fact, don't we have construction workers from most of the other villages?" I shake my head, "You're becoming paranoid."

"Somebody has to be, might as well be the one in charge," What's happening to him?

"Enjoy the peace time, dobe, since you're the one who brought it about!"

"I can't enjoy anything if I have so much work to do!" What the hell, dobe? Don't snap at me like that!

As a final burn, he lets go of of my legs and leans back into his chair, obviously shooing me off of him. Growling, I stand up and stalk to the door so I can leave this bastard to his work.

"I'll bring you your damn contracts, if you want work," I slam the door behind me and brush by all the guards who try asking me a question. However, a couple guards are having a conversation in the break room about something interesting to me.

"Yeah, man! My workload has been cut down by a half, at least!" That's ridiculous, people should be working now more than ever! What the fuck would've cut it down that far?

"I know! They gave me the next week off! My family and I are taking a trip to a resort town," They? Does he mean...

The fucking elders.

They're giving Naruto the work of thirty people, aren't they! Damn it! They're going to pay for what they're doing to him!

Protecting Naruto from work-related depression isn't part of my job description, but it is included in my duties as his lover. This task will take going to the source, but some damage control needs to be done first. By damage, I mean lack of sexual contact. We're living together, but there has only been two days in that whole dry span of time that Naruto didn't pass out as he walked through our front door. Even so, his eyes don't look like they're even on me, so I end up too pissed off to come.

Not that he's noticed.

That's it. I'm done! Those bastards are getting a taste of my power.

The guards let me in without even watching me warily, as is usually the custom around me. No, the fools led the predator to the prey. Without hesitation or greeting, I metaphorically pounced. With my Mangekyou fully activated, I look down at the elders.

"I believe we should have a little talk about Naruto's workload."

"Hnnn…" they groan in response. If I hated them less, I might have been able to smirk at their zombie impression.

"First, all of his extraneous studies should be removed. He and I will decide what duties have been traditionally the Hokage's and which ones should be added."

"Mhm," Koharu hummed in agreement. Finally, the bitch has stopped being difficult. I should have thought of this plan earlier, before Naruto's light was reduced to a pinprick.

"Next, any superfluous work that has been assigned to me shall be assigned to their proper specialists. We will still oversee the progress," I continue my list, wracking my thoughts for any other desires.

"Uh," Mitokado grunts. I think of one more addition, and the rest of my plan floods in from the depths of my libido.

"You will come in at four o'clock to assign Naruto and I a Shinobi Alliance- related mission to theKing Coin Casino. It's a mission," What the hell would we be doing at a casino for the Alliance? "To see if it could serve as a resting area for any Kages passing through."

Good enough.

"Yes," Koharu muttered, and I break eye contact. My suggestion will still be burned into their minds.

I should go pack. After all, it's four o'clock in thirty minutes.

"That place again?" Naruto stares at the elders with his mouth slightly agape. I don't bother acting surprised at Mitokado's mission assignment. Recon on a casino seems legitimate.

"It would be an interesting place for Kages to stay if any were to visit our country," I shrug and place a hand on Naruto's shoulder. "It's good that I already have us packed and prepared for missions."

"Why would you assume that we'd be getting missions?" He looks up at me with an eyebrow cocked. For once, Naruto isn't playing dumb.

"Sometimes, the Hokage will get called out suddenly. I wanted you to be ready for anything. I'm your Assistant, remember?" Squeezing his shoulder, I address the elders once more.

"If that's all, then Naruto and I will be leaving immediately. No need for any guards, it's not far from here," I feel no reason to hide my smugness, as they are moronic enough to not realize they're being controlled.

When were these two _ever_ considered good shinobi? They can't even realize that they're being manipulated by an infamous genjutsu user!

"I can't see Gaara staying at a place like this," Naruto winced at the loud chatter of the gamblers and the ringing and beeping of the machines. Now that we're here, I should probably tell him what I did.

"Naruto, let's get our room. I have something to tell you," I whispered in his ear just like we did on our first visit to the King Coin Casino. It feels like that was ages ago, even though it was only a month and a half.

"Tell me?" he asks, but I don't say another word until we've requested our room and entered it. It's a more modest suite, except for one detail.

It's covered in mirrors. The walls, the ceilings, the headboard of the bed; all are covered in clear mirrors. The floor, thankfully, is carpeted, though the red fibers must be three inches tall. I know what I had planned wasn't very clean, but this is porn-style lewdness. Maybe I should request a different room...

"These mirrors are pretty, don't you think?" he gives me a light smile. Screw it, then. If he likes it, we'll stay.

"I can tell you now, I guess," I raise my hands and press his chest back until he sits on the bed. I can see all of my actions in the headboard and the wall, but I try to stop making eye contact with myself.

"To put it simply, you are overstressed, so much so that you've been neglecting me. Once I realized that the elders were giving work from other departments, I decided to deal with them my own way."

"Sasuke, you didn't!" His eyes grow wide, but I finish my speech before he can object.

"I . . . _'persuaded'_ them to give us a fake mission to this casino. I remembered the thick walls and privacy, which is what we need for the next part of my plan."

"Your plan? How many parts are there in this 'plan'?" I don't blame him for being skeptical about the morality of my actions, but he'll know that I have good intentions soon.

"First part was getting us here. Second part is to get you out of this work stupor by waking you up with highly unconventional sex," There, plain and simple.

"That sounds like a fucked-up Sleeping Beauty," Naruto laughs, much to my relief. Being out of the village is doing wonders for his mood.

"Then tomorrow, we return to the village and confront the Elders about their actions. If they don't comply, we'll have them tried for traitorous behavior," My plan is simple. We'll have no trouble pulling it off when we get back.

"I might not know the textbook definition of it, but I can smell irony. You, accusing them of being traitors?" Only he can say something like that without getting brutally attacked.

"It takes one to know one," Sounds appropriate, but I didn't bring Naruto to a mirrored room in a casino to discuss commonly used phrases or rhetorical devices. Making it clear that I'm done talking, I unzip Naruto's jacket and fling it onto a nearby plush chair. "Now shut up and let me help you."

"Sure, Sasuke. Heal me with the power of your cock," Naruto tickled my stomach. I seethe internally, but I press on. Wordlessly, I strip him down to his boxers. Maybe he'll see how serious I am when I start the next phase.

"Naruto, make a clone . . . or two," If this doesn't wake him up, I'll eat my katana.

"What do we need them for?" He asks, but he's making the sign for it anyway. Soon, two other Narutos are sitting on either side of the original.

"Use your damn imagination. Are you too much of an idiot to realize the implication behind me wanting three of you at once?"

"Mirrors and clones, huh? Kinky," All three Narutos smirked devilishly.

"That's the whole point, dobe. Vanilla sex won't wake you up, seeing as you practically fell asleep on me the whopping two times we did it!" I grumbled, but the original Naruto merely shakes his head and laughs.

"Yeah, I'm sorry, Sasuke. Let me make that all up to you, hm?" Together, they stand up and start pulling at my clothes. None of them touch my long arm guards, though I was expecting that. My gloves are, after all, one of his biggest turn ons. I'm surprised they're not a mess by now.

Without warning, a hand goes over my eyes while other hands pull me onto the bed. My other senses activated when I heard steps. The hand over my eyes switched a few times before it's removed from my face. Now that I see the three identical Narutos in front of me, I can't determine the original. My eyes grow wide when the three dobes smirk.

"Okay, Sasuke. Let's get _wild_," I barely have time to let out a small gasp at the old phrase before they attack me on all sides. The flanking Naruto suck and bite playfully at my neck and shoulders while kneading my thighs and spreading my legs. The third Naruto kisses me deeply for a few moments before dropping his head to my nipples. Lazily moving my eyes from one Naruto to the other, I notice a strange detail. One Naruto keeps his eyes on what the middle dobe is doing, while the other one watches my expressions with intense focus.

I think that I may be the idiot who didn't realize the implication behind having three Narutos at once.

As if on cue, the Narutos go a step lower on my body. To aid in waking him up, I make it my duty to release every erotic moan and pant and growl that I can as they suck at my nipples and cock. My head flies back at one particularly hard suck from the middle Naruto.

Maybe I should've thought that through. My breath catches in my throat when I see my lustful eyes staring back at me from the ceiling. Three blond heads move with their ministrations, and three tan bodies wrap around my pale, naked one, all visible from the surrounding mirrors.

"Keep watching," the Naruto that's been observing me whispers in my ear. I obey until the voyeurism brings me near the edge. This level of play should be forbidden for someone as inexperienced as me . . .

With a few warning moans, I prepare to come. My lower muscles tighten and roughly force my cum out.

Wait, Naruto! Don't pull away! Stop! What are you doing! He knew I was coming, why didn't he catch it in his mouth? Why did he let me . . .

The other Narutos bend down and start licking my cum from Naruto's face, all three of them glancing up at me suggestively. So, that's how he wants to play this, huh? I hope my nerves don't get the better of me, then.

"Heh," I smirk down at the center Naruto, who I'm starting to suspect is the original, "What next?"

"Do you really have to ask?" No, but I do want to know why I'm being blindfolded with a headband.

"I guess not," I mutter as I listen to the footsteps. "Why do you keep shuffling yourselves around?"

"Don't want you to be biased, now. If you don't know the original, you'll have to treat all of us equally," The headband is removed, and I'm left staring into the mirror at three Narutos standing behind my prostrated body.

"I know what one of us will be doing, Sasuke," The one on the right spoke, and then the left one picked up where the other left off, "But what do you want the other two to do?"

Fitting the four of us together in my mind was like a sexual puzzle with many ways of fitting the pieces together. Finally making a decision, I pull one Naruto onto the bed in front of me. Backing up a foot, I kneel another Naruto in front of me. I suck on the Naruto in front of me before explaining myself. The kneeling Naruto follows suit, engulfing my whole shaft and swallowing the tip.

Out of the corner of my eye, I watch the scene from a side view. I can watch Naruto's cock disappear into my mouth while a similar view occurs below to myself. The third Naruto has found some lotion to use as lube. He slathers some onto himself, then grabs my hips.

Isn't he forgetting to . . . _oh fuck!_

He forces himself into my unprepared ass, my intial pain only slightly lessened by the lotion. He sets a quick pace, pushing himself as deep as possible with every quick thrust of his hips. All three of them moan and whisper my name. As ideas come to mind, I give breathless orders to the three.

"You," I pull the hair of the Naruto under me, "Touch . . . yourself,"

There will be no falling asleep this time. _Ne_, Naruto?

As I fuck Naruto's mouth while sucking his cock and feel him pounding against _that _spot, my moans turn into screams, pleads, and prayers. All I want is _more_.

_Faster!_

_ Harder!_

_ More!_

_ Naruto!_

I chant inside my reeling mind as I greedily lick his leaking slit, digging my nails into his muscular legs. He grips and pulls my hair as all of his muscles tighten. I expect his climax and position myself to catch his cum.

Instead, smoke blinds me as the clone disappears. Simultaneously, the Naruto inside of me screams in surprise, violently coming into me and more onto my back before collapsing onto his knees. The other Naruto stops and goes to check on who I'm guessing is the original Naruto.

"What was that?" I can't catch my breath, so I also drop onto my knees. My erection is painful enough that it's bringing tears to my eyes.

"D-don't you know?" Naruto pulls in a ragged breath, "I gain any memories from my clones when they disappear. You . . . you're pretty damn talented, aren'tcha?"

"Heh. You seem pretty shaken. Am I going to have to finish myself off?" That better sound like a challenge, because I'm not going this far to please him to only be short-changed in the end.

"No, but I think I need to catch my breath for a moment," He sighs and sits on the bed where the other Naruto had been. He falls back and breathes deeply, his chest expanding and falling.

After a very short break, he glances towards the side mirror. Slowly, a smirk pulls at his mouth. He reaches to the end table and grabs the lotion again. Once he has enough, he reaches down between his legs. To my surprise, he doesn't stop when he reaches his cock.

Spreading his legs wantonly, Naruto presses his slickened fingers into himself and starts scissoring his untouched ring of muscle. I watch shamelessly for a moment, but I can't keep my hands to myself. Grabbing the underside of his knees, I press his legs back and lean onto them so I can reach Naruto's lips. As our tongues dance unceasingly, the other Naruto applies lotion to my cock. As soon as he's finished, he presses my hips forward and until I'm aligned with Naruto's entrance. With another slow push, I'm sheathed into Naruto.

His breath catches and his brow furrows, but it doesn't stop him from squirming and pressing me into him harder. After a rhythm was set, the other Naruto joins by entering me. My hips are guided by the Naruto behind me to the original's sensitive prostate. I'm sped towards climax by the pleasure of being surrounded by Naruto in every sense of the phrase.

The sight in the headboard mirror was almost too much to bear, and the side view wasn't any less graphic. Overtaken by so much stimuli, I release myself into Naruto with an embarassingly loud cry of his name. I tightened my muscles too much, so the final clone disappears.

A babbling string of loud curses flies out of Naruto's lips as his second (technically third) orgasm overtakes him. Hot cum splatters onto our stomachs, and we're left as a messy heap of sweaty, cum-filled and semen-covered bodies.

The intensity left me blinded for a moment, but it completely knocked the dobe unconscious. Unable to keep my eyes open, I also start drifting off.

The final part of my plan can wait until our nerves have stopped screaming out in pleasure.

So, yes, the chapter that I made you guys wait twenty some days for is a short, kinky lemon from the dark recesses of my mind. Hope you're not disappointed. Luckily, for all of you, I promised to have it done by my birthday. That means, in three days at the maximum, my final chapter will be up along with the sub-plot explanation chapter. ^-^

But yeah, sorry for my disappearance. I got Skyrim, and since my mind was always on that, I couldn't find the mindset I needed to be in to write this dirty piece of work.


	19. Final Trial: Expectation

It's alright, everyone! I somehow managed to settle on an idea for the ending! It's thanks to inspiration from the most recent chapters, so this **includes spoilers.**

**Disclaimer: **I never ever ever owned Naruto, but what the hell, sometimes I feel like a NaruSasu fan should.

Oh wait, nevermind. Kishi already is a fan, and so are the people in the Anime Team that just made the new ending.

CYBER POPCORN AS A CELEBRATION FOR ALL MY PATIENT REVIEWERS!

* * *

><p><em>Final Trial: Expectations<em>

Not only should my brain not be working, my legs can't possibly be moving me through a damn forest! My afterglow is lasting way too long, and I blame that sexy, scheming, perverted bastard!

Following behind said bastard isn't helping my situation much, so I rush up to walk side by side with Sasuke. His eyes flick over to me, and I wink at him. He's not getting teased nearly enough, so I quickly squeeze his ass.

"No limp, huh? You're getting pretty good at this," I watch his smirk grow with my compliment. "In fact, I might even consider you a decent lover," Not so fast, Sasuke. His smirk falls and he glares at me. I can't hold in my laughter much longer, his face is priceless!

"I'm not the one who was knocked unconscious, dobe," Fuckin' A, he got me there. I fling an arm across his shoulders and plant a sloppy kiss on his cheek. I would've gone for his neck, but he has it tightly covered up to hide all of the hickies I put there. A surge of pride made it's way up to my grin. I really am kick-ass, aren't I, Sasuke?

"Be serious for a second, dobe, as impossible as that is for you," Yeah, yeah, go on with your mood swings, teme, "How are we going to handle the elders?"

Good question, but I really wish we didn't have to talk to them at all. I mean, what the hell are they going to do to Sasuke if we tell them that they got controlled? Should we even tell?

"No, I really don't want to tell them what you did," I mutter, but I know he can hear me.

"I never said that had to be part of it. We need to have a plan to get them to comply with the changes. They need to back off of you or I will force them to," Ya know, it's hard to believe that this is the same pissed-off, mangy Sasuke from when I first saw him again; even harder to think he's the same person as the hell-bent on revenge twelve year-old who I called my rival-slash-best-friend.

"Wouldn't it be kinda stupid to cause a scene right in the middle of the village? We barely have everyone's trust, and they respect the elders!" I take Sasuke's hand in mine, holding it firmly.

"If it's a matter of respect, then the villagers definitely respect you much more. The ones who still revere the elders are the older ones who remember them as ninja. You have the upper hand, Naruto. Use it." He tightens his grip on my hand, and I sigh. What the hell am I supposed to do, huh?

With last night fully behind us and the seriousness of what we're about to do, the crater of Konoha comes into view. My young, unpainted village with its bustling villagers . . .

A familiar tightness clenches around my navel, and I swear I can hear a growl. Sasuke doesn't look at me, so I know the growl wasn't because I want some Ichiraku ramen.

In one of my very rare floods of genius, a plan clicks into my head.

"Let me try something. Just trust me . . ."

* * *

><p>Kotetsu and Izumo flash wide smiles before opening the doors for Sasuke and me. The meeting room is unchanged from the very first time was called in here, complete with Shikamaru and Sakura.<p>

"Hey, you two!" Standing behind them, I place my hands on their shoulders. They both look back at me, only slightly surprised. I hope they leave soon, I don't want them getting in the middle of all of this.

"Naruto!" Sakura smiles up at me, "I was just reporting the safe return of the Suna doctors."

"Then what the hell is Shika doing here?" I'm not doing much to lighten the tension, but it's somethin'.

"I was the other escort. Someone had to do it," Shikamaru sighed and glanced at the clock. He's probably been doing that since he got here.

"Naruto and I have our own report for the elders, so if you would?" Sasuke raises an eyebrow, and they understand it as a sign to get out of here, fast. They bow to the elders and dismiss themselves. Sakura gives me a questioning look, so I try to calm her with a smile. From the look on her face, I don't think she's buying it.

When the door slides shut behind us, we take the seats that they just left open. Time to get to work.

"You know, I never got to ask why we kept those doctors for so long. Sakura was returned to us a while ago," I begin slowly, trying to keep a light tone.

"Don't you remember, Naruto?" Mitokado folds his hands on the table, "You signed a document to the Kazekage requesting their prolonged stay for research purposes."

"Oh?" I scratch the back of my head, "I guess I was a bit tired when I signed it."

"And that's our problem," Sasuke jumps right for the throat. I can't tell if it's a bad habit or not, but it works.

"I agree. It's unsafe for our Hokage to be unfocused when he's handling the village's affairs," Koharu, I swear, you need to go fall over and not get up!

"It's his workload, not his work ethic that is to blame!" Sasuke hisses lowly. I don't even need to look to know that his Sharingan is spinning.

"Being the Hokage is a difficult job, Uchiha," Koharu replies back just as icily.

"It's only this difficult because you've simplified all the other jobs in this building! You have him doing so much work from all the departments that there are people taking vacations!" I almost feel as though Sasuke is being my lawyer. I really need to speak up, too!

"I just wanted a chance to show you that I could be a good leader for this village, but then you pull a stunt like this!" Might as well confront them head-on as the ones to blame, right? Tip-toeing around it won't help anybody. This really isn't going how I intended. . .

"How dare you-!"

"You're right," Mitokado interrupts Koharu, who looks at him with shock. "We had so much trouble with Tsunade that we wanted to make you more compliant. However, it has come to our attention that you have done very well as the Hokage and as a hero to this village."

Well, damn. Mitokado is the nicer one, after all!

"So you're going to make things right, just like that?" Sasuke has an edge of suspicion in his voice. I don't blame him, they aren't the type of people to budge like this.

"We can discuss what his duties are over tea," Mitokado's forever-stoic face pulls into a faint smile.

Koharu scoffs quietly before bringing out four cups. With a snap of her fingers, an ANBU comes in with a teapot. With her loose kimono sleeve dangling, she pours red tea for all of us. Shrugging, I sip my tea. Sasuke, on the other hand, knocks it all back in one go.

"My, are you in a hurry, Uchiha?" Koharu tilts her head, smirking lightly at Sasuke's display of ill manners.

"To die? No, not really. But I hope you are," He unsheathes his katana, brandishing it in front of the elders. Not a single person here is surprised. That is, until Sasuke stabs me in the heart.

Their faces get even better when I dissipate into a cloud of smoke.

* * *

><p>I'm never gonna get used to having my clone's memories appear in my mind, but I'll have to get over it. I told Sasuke to trust me, and he did his part. Now, it's my turn.<p>

Using chakra borrowed from my buddy, Kurama (I still like that better than Kyuubi) I form a large fist of glowing chakra. Bashing it down, I burst a hole straight into the meeting room. I jump down to stand side by side with Sasuke.

"I was wondering if you'd let your real self be present for this. You wouldn't want to miss the Uchiha's death, or yours," Mitokado is NOT the nice one, damn it!

"Not gonna happen, you assholes!" I turn my head to Sasuke, "No wonder I could sense their maliciousness from a mile away, they're practically soaking the tatami with it!"

"Did you really think we'd jump blindly into your clutches?" Sasuke readies his blade again, facing the elders this time. "Kuroni's red potion, the other half of his chakra cure, hidden in red tea. Not the best cover."

"I hope you enjoyed it, Uchiha. It was made especially for you by the Suna doctors. It should start affecting you in," Koharu looks at the clock, "Three seconds."

"If your appearance as a jellyfish tells me anything, I'd assume you've also spiked it with that damn drug?" Fuckin' A, not again! It was already bad enough the first time, now Sasuke's gotta fight the elders while high off his ass?

"It's not an instant process, so we couldn't have you be capable of doing any damage before dying," Mitokado crosses his arms as if the bastard's scolding us.

"Who says he's dying?" A tired voice comes from the door, joined with a higher one yelling Sasuke's name.

"Shikamaru! Sakura! Didn't you leave?" I'm happy to see them and all, but I don't want them to get hurt in this fight.

"We thought that the doctors were pretty skittish when we took them back, and they'd been spending most of their time with the elders. It didn't take me long to piece the rest together," As Shikamaru talks, Sakura runs over to Sasuke and checks him with her chakra.

"His mitochondria are going insane! If they keep going, he'll burst into flames!" That has something to do with Kuroni's cure, doesn't it? One side gets the disease pulled out of them, the other gets infected, and then they blow up. Right?

Man, I hate it when I'm right.

_"What's that damn tugging!"_ The Kyuubi growls at me, and before I know it, purple smoke is seeping from my seal.

"Hold still, Sasuke. I can get some of the drug out, but you've already absorbed a lot. I don't know if I-" Sakura interrupts herself, blocking a flurry of kunai thrown at her and Sasuke. Her intense glare and pissed-off aura chill the room as she stares down Koharu.

"You may be an adviser, but I advise _you_ to not try that again. I doubt you want to know what happens when you fuck with my friends," her growl makes even me shrivel back. That's my girl!

"Standing around here is boring," Shikamaru picks up one of the kunai that Sakura stopped, then points it at Mitokado. "If I have the Hokage's permission, I'd like to attack the traitors with the intent to kill."

"I know I should say something about revenge and peace, but if watching Sasuke during the Trials told me anything, it was there's nothing wrong about kicking ass to protect those you love. So, go get 'em!"

Jumping into action literally, we took the fight to the roof, leaving Sakura and Sasuke in the room below.

"We need to get to the forest, Shikamaru. I don't want to cause a panic!" I yell over as I dodge a wicked roundhouse kick from the old chick. They're trying to delay us by only using taijutsu, I know, but I'm not sure I can handle much more than this. The elders are fast, somehow, and the pain in my stomach feels as though a blender was turned on in my gut. If Kurama's growls are any indication, he's feeling the same pain.

"Sakura, bring Sasuke when you can!" Shikamaru called down to her. She yells in response, but I can't make out what she's said.

"She said it won't take long. Anyway, she's already dealt with this drug before."

"Heh, hear that?" I smile mockingly at the elders, "It seems as though you've screwed yourself every step of the way. You should've had some other people do your fetch missions!"

"Knowing isn't going to help you anymore, demon boy! You will die either way, and the Uchiha and Jinchuuriki plagues will finally be cured," Mitokado controls his voice, but I can hear the long-lived hatred.

"And after that, we'll get rid of that demon spawn that Tsunade-hime has been watching- Ugh!"

She doesn't have much time to react before my hand is at her throat. In a single surge of chakra, I blast us into the forest, knocking down trees with Koharu's back.

Shikamaru and Mitokado arrive in time to see Koharu pick herself up from the ground where I threw her. Taking his chance, Shikamaru uses his shadow to tie her to an unbroken tree.

"Hurry up with Mitokado. I can't hold her like this forever," He smirks at me, "Not everyone has unlimited chakra."

"Noted!" But before I attack the readied Mitokado, I glare over at Koharu. "You know, if it was just me and Sasuke you were threatening, I would accept just defeating you in battle then locking you in jail. No, instead you bring my kid into this."

Yeah, they're pretty much fucked.

When I fall screaming to my knees, I know that I'm not in the best shape, either.

I sort hear Shikamaru yelling out my name, but nothing sounds louder than Kurama's terrible growls and howls. I don't know exactly when it happens, but those sounds start coming out of my own mouth.

* * *

><p><em>"Let me out, let me out, LET ME OUT!" <em>The fox crashes against his cage door, ignoring the pain of the seal resisting him.

"What are you saying! If you get out, you'll be ripped out of me, put into Sasuke, then killed! You don't _want_ out!"Inside myself, I jump to the top of the thrashing Kurama.

_"If you turn into me, you idiot, we can kill them quickly!"_ He growls, foam falling from the corners of his mouth.

"Wait, is this like Octopops and Hachibi? You'll get back in? Sh-shit!" I cringe with Kyuubi as another wave of pain blackens my vision.

_"Yeah, yeah, whatever! If you make this pain stop, I'll fucking do tricks, just make it STOP! Kill them and_ _fix this!" _I look down at him when I gain my vision back. His red fur is sticking up as much as Sasuke's does and his long claws are digging into the ground.

We're both at the ends of our ropes. I close my eyes and allow myself to sink. . .

* * *

><p>Suddenly, I'm as tall as a mountain and sporting nine more appendages on my ass. Despite this unfamiliar vantage point, my sharp eyes and nose point out the elders below me. Weirdly enough, I can even smell Shikamaru's fear at seeing the Kyuubi.<p>

"It's fine, Shika," It sounds extremely stupid coming from the Kyuubi's voice, "Look!"

It takes me a few moments to figure out how to do it, but soon I disconnect from Kurama and end up sticking out from between his eyes.

"That's better. See, Shika! We're under control here!"

"Tch, says you," Kurama scoffs and paws the ground, "At least the damn pain subsided."

We may be better, but Shikamaru isn't doing so well. His shadow weakens enough that Koharu breaks out of its hold.

"So you're showing your true form, demon boy? Killing you now will be much more satisfying," Koharu performs some hand seals and blasts a large fireball at me. Kyuubi blocks it with three of his tails, singeing his fur.

"Give up already," a circle of black fire rises around the elders, and a large purple figure appears from the thick woods. Its glowing bow and arrow points towards the elders as its face turns into a white, disturbingly simple grin.

Sasuke's Susanoo is as creepy as ever. He pulls back his arrow, ready to strike down the elders, but he directs his arrow into the woods past them. With the explosion, throngs of former ANBU Root vrfw embers burst out and attack Shikamaru and Sakura, who had appeared along with Sasuke. The elders whip out wire and attach it to trees, using it to leap out of the Amaterasu fire circle.

"It won't be long now. Can't you feel it?" Koharu cackles as she leaps towards me.

Augh, _my stomach!_

Koharu's kunai get planted into Kurama's shoulder before we can react. I feel the pain in my own shoulder, making me cry out.

_"End this, Naruto!" _Kurama hisses, turning his head towards Sasuke, who also has fallen to his knees.

"_Die!_" Mitokado leaps, summoning a _kusarigama _chain-sickle from one of his three scrolls. He moves to bring it down on the shaking Sasuke.

Everything goes in slow motion for me. I yell out Sasuke's name, and he cries out. But it's not in pain, is it? He looks so determined suddenly, and his mouth opens wide as the sickle bears down towards him.

A great surge of red flares up and engulfs both Sasuke and Mitokado. It clears up before my heart can start beating again.

Sasuke stands up, wiping the ashes from his charred lips. A nearly unrecognizable burnt body lies at his feet. Pointing his sword at the remains of Mitokado, Sasuke finally manages to talk in a hoarse voice.

"Your final mistake was trying to kill a fire-chakra user with fire. Idiot," he coughs, then looks up at me. When I wave at him, he leaps up to stand next to me.

"MITOKADO!" Koharu screams, tears streaming from her wild eyes. Her hair comes out of its bun and flies behind her as she runs towards his body.

"Koharu, just stop this!" I yell down, but she is totally deaf to me. Without missing a beat, she starts making hand seals. I don't recognize the pattern, but instinct tells me that Kurama does.

"Like hell I'm letting that happen again!" he yells, flinging all nine of his tails towards Koharu. I try to will him to stop, but I'm not nearly fast enough (or in disagreement enough) to stop him from crushing Koharu and a mile of forest with his tails. The resulting earthquake stopped all other fighting entirely.

"Damn it," Looking out at the results of this shitstorm, I sigh, "Why did it have to turn out like this, huh?"

"Don't, Naruto. I would sooner mourn the dead squirrels and birds from those trees before I would regret killing these insane elders," Sasuke, in a fucked up way, reassures me.

"Why can't I shake the feeling that this was for revenge?" I don't like how Sasuke's face changes when I say that word.

"I'd be lying if I said it doesn't feel good to have killed those responsible for my clan's massacre. No matter what their reasons were, it was my family that they ordered to have killed. This time, though," his eyes soften, "I wanted to protect my new family."

"Heh, right!"

Though my immediate family is Sasuke and Aero, all of my friends feel like family to me. My entire village is my family, even though we have fights sometimes. Even the elders were like annoying, angry grandparents to a lot of people.

"We should gather. . .their remains. . .for a proper burial" My head starts spinning. I think my fatigue is starting to kick in, or something, I don't. . .

* * *

><p>No, Sasuke...<p>

I don't want to wake up yet, it's too cold outside...

Can you shut the T.V. off? The people on it won't. . . stop. . .screaming?

"You saw him! He really is the monster fox! He nearly lost control and destroyed the village _again_!"

"Oi, Uchiha brat! Can you get Naruto to wake up already and help me here?" Tsunade?

"M'wake," I groaned, lifting my head up from what I figured out was Shikamaru's shoulder. Ah, so that wasn't Sasuke groping my legs, it's just Shika holding me up. Fuckin' A, I passed out, didn't I?

"Good. Do ya think you can whip up a speech for a mob?" Tsunade flourished her hands towards the frenzied villagers filling the street in front of us.

"Sheesh! You guys are moodier than Sasuke," I groan and peel myself from Shikamaru's back. A few cracks of my joints later, I stand up straight to face the crowd.

"I'm not stupid enough to think that all of you would be too pleased to see the whole Kyuubi right outside of our freshly reconstructed village, I get it. But Kurama- I mean, the Nine-Tails- has no reason or will to hurt anyone here. I could sense it if he did!"

"After that show out in the forest, why should we believe you?" An ANBU guard with his mask up asked me before spitting on the ground.

"You'll have to take my word for it, I guess. I'm sorry that I can't say anything better than that. He's been this free since the war! It's been over a year now, and you're just now worrying about him running out?"

This started up a whole new rant from the villagers. Most of their eyes are so wide that I can see the whites even from one-hundred yards away. How do they expect me to say one thing to calm their eighteen year-old fear?

Or maybe I shouldn't say anything, if the sword at my throat is any sign.

"So, you all think I should finish the job, huh? I should pretend that Naruto never existed, that he and his fox never saved your pathetic asses and protected your crushed village?" Without any wind, Sasuke's hair flicks and sways in warning, "I should cut his throat and let you bathe in the blood instead of remembering that Kyuubi was the only reason Naruto could last in a battle against all the tailed beasts. Naruto should _DIE_ because you're all _fucking bored_ with how safe he keeps your families!"

Another kunai appears at my right temple before I can say anything to Sasuke.

"Perhaps I should stab him because he surpassed all the hopes my mentor had for him," Whoa, Kakashi-sensei, give me some room here!

Nope, I just get a glowing fist underneath my chin.

"Maybe I should bash his brains out for being the only Kage in history to ever have the respect of all the other Kages," S-Sakura-chan!

"My shadows could rip him into pieces, but I think he would make me figure out how to protect everyone with his remains. It would be too troublesome," Shikamaru holds me still with his shadows, and one curls itself around my body all the way to my forehead. Something tells me he's just trying to stop me from hitting all the weapons around me.

A small figure wiggles its way through the crowd of people. Finally, Hinata squeezes her way out into the space between my group and the mob. Without hesitation, she faces me with her Byakugan activated and her hands in a ready position.

"I, too, will kill Naruto as a representative of the Hyuuga clan. He never should have made it so that the first and second branches could live in harmony," She smiles lightly at me, not a hint of nerves in her.

And with her came the rest of the "Rookie 9", all spouting some gruesome way of killing me and good things I've done these past five years. I don't even remember doing half of these things, really! That doesn't stop the tears flowing out of my eyes.

What does stop them is the red chakra flowing from my stomach and onto the ground. Before I realize what's happening, an Akamaru-sized Kurama is standing in front of me.

"As the object of all your fears, I will kill Naruto for all of you. It's the least I can do to repay him for releasing me from the bonds of hatred that threatened your little dwelling. It's also what all of you expect of me, is it not?"

Total silence follows the mini-Kurama's question, but my ballsiest friend approached him with a blank smile on his face.

"I'm sure you'll surprise everyone, Kyuubi-san," Sai reached out his hand, that weird look still on his face.

"It's Kurama, you ANBU brat," he grumbled, but he placed his thin paw on top of Sai's outstretched hand. The entire village gasped and backed up a few steps.

"Okay, so maybe you've got it under control. Maybe," whispers the old hag from the Paper Bag. In response, Sasuke gently smiles at me, along with all of my friends and comrades and supporters and teachers.

"You'll just have to prove it like always."

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><p><em>Epilogue:<em>

Kurama's been manifesting himself outside of my body for about a year now, and yet I'm still not used to it! I mean, how often do you see a gigantic fox sitting in the corner of a room? I know he doesn't pose a danger or anything, but I don't wanna see what happens if Aero keeps pulling on his tails.

Yeah, that's right! Aero is finally staying with me and Sasuke! Tsunade takes care of him when we have long missions or too much work, or on any day that she feels bored. Those days, for obvious reasons, are my favorite.

And the ass, A.K.A. the obvious reason, just walked in and sat down on its chair next to mine, along with the human it's attached to.

"You only have three more papers to look through, then we can take Aero for a walk," Sasuke put said papers in the bin next to me and kissed my head, as usual.

"Sure, as long as it isn't a billion degrees outside. Damn summer and it's crazy-ass heat waves," I take a sip of coffee before grabbing my pen and attacking the new set of forms.

"I never thought I'd see the day when you started sounding like some curmudgeonly old man. You're even squinting, dobe," he smirks and scratches the spot on my neck where I like it.

"Someone grab the kit from my tails before he loses himself in there!" Kurama growls at us, but I know he wouldn't put up with Aero if he didn't like him. Nevertheless, Sasuke picks up our wriggling kid and bouncing him in his lap.

"Shall we go on a walk, Aero?" Sasuke uses a lighter tone, but he absolutely refuses to baby-talk him. He nearly tore my ass apart for going "Aero Bear-o!" once when changing him.

"Ya know, if you talk to him like that, he's gonna grow up to sound like Rock Lee. He doesn't need to use old-timey grammar!" I look up from the papers when I hear Aero giggling. Standing shakily and using Sasuke's bangs to keep himself upright, Aero stares into Sasuke's eyes. His giggling increases when Sasuke makes his pupils spin slowly.

"If you hypnotize our kid, I'll cook dinner for a week!" I leaned away for my work long enough to plant a small kiss on my kid and a big kiss on Sasuke.

"Like hell I'm letting you near the stove," I don't blame him. See, I made dinner a week ago, okay? We only managed to get all of the stains out today. I get it, I suck at cooking anything but ramen.

"Fine, go ahead and be the good little housewife in the kitchen all the time! You can stay with the kid all the time, too, like a good mommy!" Sasuke can try to tease me, but he'll never be_ the_ _master_.

"Why would I deprive you of the chance to take care of Aero?" he smirks, "Raising a kid is like another Trial, Hokage-sama."

"Oh, fuckin' A! Please, no more Trials!"

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><p>You heard Naruto! No more Trials. Finally, I got out of my longest dry-spell yet. That's probably because I've scrapped the idea for the ending about. . . three times? Then I was reading the most recent manga chapters and it clicked. Honestly, though, I'm procrastinating on my last bits of midterms.<p>

Anywho, I still need to read my own story and beta it, however I will mark this as complete. Once I do that, I'll switch the sub-plot explanation to the end.

Thanks to everyone who read this before I completed it, and thanks to anyone who read this once they saw it was complete, and super-props to anybody who decided to read this all in one go. Leave a review, all of you, and I'll probably get the balls to write an AU next.

And my ultimate thanks goes to Boo, who deserves my love even more than Naruto and Sasuke deserve each other. Coming from me, that's saying something. She's the whole reason I wrote this story, so thank her if you liked this story!

Good-bye for now, everyone! *Shuts off cyber-popcorn maker and takes a bow*


	20. Trials SubPlot Explanation!

**The end, guys, but here's a bit of background!  
><strong>

Not surprisingly, I got whisked away to do things on my birthday. Meaning, I was kidnapped by my mom right after school, and only taken home at 7:40. Meanwhile, I hadn't written ANY of my final chapter, and I knew it wasn't something I should rush in five hours to get done.

But I did promise to publish something in three days. Because I determined that it doesn't give away the ending, I decided to give you the sub-plot explanation early!

Now you can learn the full story behind Kuroni Kashiwa, Lady Chance, Kemi, and how their lives intersected with Naruto and Sasuke's to bring you the main conflict of my story! Read it, put all of the pieces and Trials together, and I'll give you the final piece for your reading pleasure this weekend.

But first, a quick note about my lemon chapter. Woo hoo, that was fun to write, but I did include SasuNaru in it. I know I didn't add that to my summary or disclaimer, but I did feel like including it for one little instance. I'm trying to be more open-minded for my friends over at the Sasuke X Naruto Fan Club at Narutoforums. So, when I saw maxridelover's comment about making Naruto the "uke" for a little bit, I thought to just add that splash.

But to be perfectly honest, even though they would perhaps be switchers, my mind does not handle SasuNaru much anymore. I don't think I'll be adding it in any of my other stories that I'll ever do.

Which reminds me . . . What do I write next? Should I write again?

And if I did, should I write it in the same switching point of view style like this one, or revert back to doing third person?

When it comes to telling me what you want to see, think about what you find really hard to find that you just love to read. My thing was Part I Naruto and Sasuke. Nooo, I didn't (often) read about the 12 year olds having buttsmex, but whatever. There are still different scenarios or universes that some people just can't find enough of. Probably the only kind that I won't touch is genderbending. If it's gay, I'll go all the way. I'm looking forward to seeing what my fans (Squee I have fans oh mah gawd) want to read, because I'm willing to keep writing and not drop off the face of the Internet like I did after Cold Shower/ Taste my Love.

Oh, and another thing! I randomly looked through my comments and saw myself being referred to as "Writer-sama". I literally thought that it was just referring to the fact that I'm the writer of this story, and then I look at my username. Derp, my name is SoWrites. So, this is my official declaration that, as a NaruSasu fandom author, I would love being called Writer (-chan, -sama, -dono, -san, -teme, -dobe , etc. honorifics are all up to you to add to it.)

Uh, what was I saying? Oh right, here's the Sub-plot Explanation for The Trials . . . I admit, it's not really written fantastically. I originally only wrote it for myself and I just did some simple editing! Pst, don't own Naruto, but I do own Kuroni and Lady Chance and Big Dealer and yeah you get it.

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><p>Kuroni Kashiwa grew up as a pampered boy with his half-sister, Un-chan. When they were young, they would play card games together and dream of their futures. Un-chan wanted to become famous, one way or the other. Kuroni suggested to her, because her name means Chance, to become a <strong>professional gambler (Rat Trial)<strong>. When asked of what he wanted to do, he would always say that he wanted to be like **Un-chan's father, and doing crazy experiments like him**. His own parents were already dead, one from cancer, one from a heart attack. Kuroni believed firmly that he could find the cures for those and many other diseases. He hoped for a miracle.

Because of his high status, he was able to go to **medic school. **He and Kemi were both researching how they could contain mass amounts of Chakra, because they both believed that it was due to chakra deficiencies or blockages in non-ninjas that caused many of their diseases and weak immune systems. They thought that if they flooded their system with huge amounts of Chakra that they could kill any virus or unwanted bodies without harming the patient. While he was in school, he created a working chakra container that he used as his senior project. **They kept it at the school for further research (Rabbit Trial).**

When he just graduated, Kuroni was approached by a pale man who was seeking talented medic nins such as himself. He boasted huge laboratories and many willing test patients. Once they arrived at Orochimaru's hide-out and entered the labs, Kuroni realized that these test patients weren't so willing. He tried to refuse, but Orochimaru needed his knowledge of the containment of chakra for his many forbidden jutsus and for when he transfers his body. When he sees that Kuroni wasn't going to comply, he injected him with a **highly addictive chakra drug **that changes the direction of the flow of chakra, almost like turning around the poles of a magnet. The effect is an ecstatic high and heightened vision, due to the extreme amounts of chakra flowing to the mind and eyes. However, the withdrawal of this drug has **horrifying side effects.**

With Kuroni under his control, they would work together for years, experimenting with different ways to make Kuroni and Kemu's chakra flooder more effective. Orochimaru saw that, after so many years of abusing it, Kuroni was developing a high tolerance for the drug. His body was adjusting to the strange chakra flow. So, knowing it would cause a stronger effect, Orochimaru started mixing this drug into the chakra flooder. With that, Kuroni's body and mind changed with little hope of a cure. He became horribly paranoid, and he saw Orochimaru as a god. He'd board himself in his room for days with no sleep because he was too busy screaming at the demons crawling through his walls. Other days, he'd go running away from the labs suddenly, shouting hysterically that the chakra was chasing him.

His paranoia extended to his old father-figure and work partner, Kemu. Under the influence of the drug, **Kuroni broke into Kemu's laboratory and murdered him**, screaming about how Kemu was doing his work for the demons. What Kuroni discovered was that Kemu had been working on the chakra container even more so then he had, spending all of his time in his labs and **away from love and family**. In his search, he found the **perfect chakra chemical, a green liquid that emits purple smoke (Tiger Trial)**. If a patient would drink it, the doctor would only have to bring in an animal (or human) sacrifice, given a red liquid, and every foreign disease, virus, or demon would be released and put into the animal, which will spontaneously combust into a sterilizing fire. Stealing Kemi's notes, Kuroni now had what would later become his most prized possession.

When Orochimaru was killed, it was like he had lost a god. But more importantly, he lost a dealer. Kuroni did not know its origin or the recipe for the drug he was so addicted to. Orochimaru never revealed that he spiked the chakra container with the drug, so the unwitting Kuroni was forced to go cold turkey. His patients, who he was using the spiked chakra flooder on, suffered from psychosis. Kuroni, while he was withdrawing, became less paranoid, but his "piety" reached its peak. He paid keen attention to the war, and saw Naruto, the container of the Kyuubi, to be the perfect vessel for the second coming of his god. Knowing that Orochimaru would need many bodies to transfer into, all with the capabilities to contain the Kyuubi, he turned to his first option: The prisoners.

He practiced on Orochimaru's prisoners, trying to make them fit for the Kyuubi and his master. "Practice" as in **"brutal and horrendous surgeries" (Snake Trial)**. Girls were ripped into being boys, men were starved and their bones were broken and shortened. Their faces were ripped and patched and stitched horrendously over and over again. Infections took over many of them, leaving them crazed and scared. The ones who didn't have sex changes were forced to mate, and their children were forced to speed through the growing process with dangerous amounts of steroids, hormones, and chakra. While some of these creatures may look sixteen, they were truly only four.

Frustrated and growing more paranoid with each day of withdrawal from the drug, he realized that his god must feel spiteful. Perhaps it was because he was offering poor excuses for vessels, these patchwork dolls! He knew his god would want to be reborn in the most supreme conditions. Listening to the voices coming from the walls, he went to find a virgin.

Knowing that Un-chan was still living her sheltered life as a Kashiwa, Kuroni kidnapped her, unknowingly **sparking a revolution between the clans (Ox Trial)**, for the Kashiwas completely blocked themselves off from the other villagers in fear of the next kidnapping. Only **one Kashiwa man **didn't suspect the Momiji clan . . . (A/N: I don't feel like keeping a secret. It's the old guy from the Ox Trial, Lady Chance's grandpa. Woo!)

The next kidnapping never came. However, the revolution was pushed to its boiling point when the Momiji's **Golden Acorn was inexplicably found in the Kashiwa's possession.**

Once he realized that he must not leave a trail, **he did what he knew would distract them** completely from Un's disappearance. She did not come quietly, but she had to be kept healthy to be a surrogate. So, forming a plan, he stole **Rummy's Mask and the Golden Acorn** from the Kashiwa and the Momiji clans' trinket collections. After planting the dupe acorn and escaping to his hide-out, he altered the mask so that it was able to hold chakra. Then, he imbued it with the drugged chakra flooder. He never realized the drug was inside of it, he had only observed its effects on his prisoners. It worked just as well on his half-sister.

Now that he had his virgin, he debated on how he would have the child conceived. He believed himself to be important enough. Unfortunately for him, he had become sterile due to his many years of chakra overloading and drug use. His next idea was even more complicated and impossible, for how was he supposed to get sperm from Naruto himself? Kuroni wasn't a ninja, so he went to his third and last plan. Orochimaru had left him with the knowledge of many dark sciences. Kuroni's particular favorite was cloning**.** So, following around Naruto and picking up items for DNA, Kuroni gathered what he needed to **clone Naruto**. One of those items was the stolen DNA from Orochimaru's former disciple and Kuroni's fallen arch-angel, Uchiha Sasuke.

He used his sister and successfully produced a clone. However, the baby was born prematurely and therefore dangerously ill. Kuroni couldn't use any steroids on him to make the child grow to the proper "age" quickly. Raising this child was going to cost him much more than intended. If he was going to keep it alive long enough to become the container for the Kyuubi, he would have to pool all of his resources. He enlisted **three nearby villages** for protection and supplies. After some plastic surgery on Un-chan, she officially became **Lady Chance**. He cut Rummy's Mask in half and instructed her to give it to the **owner of a casino**, then become his mistress. With her income, Kuroni could comfortably raise this clone and keep himself safe.

Reading over Kemi's notes, he saw that he needed to find how to reverse it; Naruto must drink the first liquid, releasing the Kyuubi, and then be the one to combust. His clone, however, must take in the Kyuubi but survive. He knew it would take him months, perhaps years to figure it out. His work was highly improved with the study of **chakra-containing crystals (Horse Trial)** that one of his guardian villages mined. He had all the pieces, and he had nothing but time...

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><p>That's what I had written, but now all of you have read Kuroni's death and you know what has happened to him since he began creating clones. Hope the pieces are becoming a bit clearer, and some Trials are looking less pointless! The only trials that aren't Kuroni-related ones (Elders or Dragon Knights related usually) are Dragon, Goat, Monkey, and Dog Trials.<p>

You can ask me any questions that you might have had, and I will answer them as long as I don't feel like they might spoil the final chapter.

* * *

><p>In the meanwhile, I had another thing written from my early days of being a Yaoi fangirl. Now, this song is only for Yaoi fan<em>girls<em>, but lots of love goes to any of the Yaoi fanboys out there! I can't really describe the tune exactly, the refrain sounds a little bit like "Oh I'm a Good Old Rebel" aka kind of American military march sounding. Honestly, play around with the tune yourself if you wanna! It gets louder and louder, when I sing it.

Oh, I'm a yaoi fangirl!

I wear my title proud and true

Oh, I'm a yaoi fangirl!

Yaoi is for me and you

Oh, I'm a yaoi fangirl!

Well if you hate my love of smut

Oh, I'm a yaoi fangirl!

Then you can take it up the butt!

Oh, I'm a yaoi fangirl!

If thoughts of buttsex make you sick

Oh, I'm a yaoi fangirl!

Then you can suck a big, fat dick!

Oh, I'm a yaoi fangirl!

I know that I don't have a cock

Oh, I'm a yaoi fangirl!

But I still say that gay boys rock!

Oh, we are yaoi fangirls!

Yaoi! Boy Love! Shonen-ai!

Oh, we are yaoi fangirl!

What we love best is GUY ON GUY!

If anyone wants to add a verse, just put it in your review of this chapter XP I have a few stored away somewhere, maybe I'll add them sometime.

**Thanks again for reading!**


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